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RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 7:49:40 AM

crouchingtigress

Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
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Yay! for shock value, in speech, in art, in actions...

It is pushing the boundaries of convention that makes for a new and fresh world, every single day. Taking risks and getting your wings clipped is the yin and yang that make the world such a damn interesting place to be...

"One can not discover new lands until he concents to leave sight of the shore" Andrew Glide

_____________________________

Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."

(in reply to RiotGirl)

Post #: 21

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 8:02:42 AM

truesub4u

Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

I can see what most are saying... so yes a little back ground is warrented here... This is Jacksonville NC.. bible belt territory... full blown Military (Camp Lejune.. USMC) Military payday weekend... jammed packed mall.. with a shit pot full of "I'm outta the house away from my parent teens" all over the place... plus general public.

Now to Answer feastie.... I am aware of the whole situation as to that day... The food court is in middle of mall with entrance to back parking lot and theater. I personally seen these couples enter.... go and order their food.. and was sitting there talking. I made eye contact with one and smiled. Now at this time mine were ingaged in each other and had not taken notice. Not 5 mins... not 10 mins... but 35 mins later... was when the rousting began. I'll go one step further to state that this Mall has within it a few stores that sell lots of BDSM playtoys so to speak... leather shop.... Goth shop (that sells dog collars... etc) Hot Topics is a major Goth/Hard Rock toy store that sells sexy clothing..to dog collars.... cuffs... ankle and wrist bracelets that can used to bind one down with... . to the dragging off your ass style pants. I think they're call trip pants.

There was no wondering around the mall at this given time nor sense I had seen them walk in. They went straight to Chinese food section and to tables. They didn't even sit in the front... they sat in the back area. So I do not think they were actually demmaning center attention. I think more people notice when the security guard began the rousting. It was not a simple whispering to the ear... it was a YOUR KIND NEED TO LEAVE... this statement is what grabbed mine and many others attention.

I know this is more ifnormation that should of been given last night... but it was 2 am... and OWNED was picking on me in IMs making me lose my train of thought on my post... so it's her fault... LOL

Though I can still understand what most are saying about shoving our ways down others throats... but hell that's a catch 22. I too do not care to see others necking so much it looks like the could start fucking right there. But as Chaingang and others stated as well... where does the offensive start and stop. It's ok to see one wearing a shirt that says.. Give Me Head Till I'm Dead... but it's offensive to wear a shirt that says... Give Me Face If That's The Case..... i've seen women size 18 trying to wear clothes for size 10... OMG talking offensive.... but they felt comfortable in them.... or the guys wearing pants that hand down below their ass so everyone can see their boxers.... my own and their friends sitting there with Goth from head to toe... from hair spiked... to make up... collars... safety pins all over body and clothes... (Damn i'm still hoping this is just a stage they're going through)....

So again.. where does it start... stop... who's to say what... to one group of people...and not another group?... And still interrested in seeing of others exprences with something like this... either witness.... or was involved personally...

_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

(in reply to RiotGirl)

Post #: 22

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 8:03:10 AM

RiotGirl

Posts: 3149
Status: offline

quote:

hi madam, i want to be ur submissive slave, i m Rahul from hisar, haryana, india. my mobile no. is +91-9896677880. u may e-mail me at [email protected] . pls feel free to call me any time.

desperation is a highly unattractive trait. <grins> You must also have difficulty reading. Did you not see the repsonse to GA? This is inapporpriate behavior, i'm highly offended and i'm gonna run off and get mall security to remove you!! <wicked grin>

Oh wait.. There are clearly defined rules for the forums. Please abide by them before the mods revoke your priviledge to participate in the forums. Think about what an unruly place the forums could be if we could all hide behind our type and run amok saying as we please.

LOL think about me not holding my tongue...

(and yes, its not okay as there are rules. Just like its not okay to go shirtless in a store. Rules! Today i have upbraided two people for imposing their right/wrong perspective - as they have directly involved me with their behavior - do as you please but dont involve me when you are clearly in the wrong)

(in reply to rahul1722003)

Post #: 23

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 8:11:15 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: truesub4u
This is Jacksonville NC.. bible belt territory... full blown Military

Yeah but NC has a huge kink population and community base. Go figure.

(Camp Lejune.. USMC) Military payday weekend... jammed packed mall.. with a shit pot full of "I'm outta the house away from my parent teens" all over the place... plus general public.

quote:

It was not a simple whispering to the ear... it was a YOUR KIND NEED TO LEAVE... this statement is what grabbed mine and many others attention.

Hard to say- it's not really the right way to handle any situation unless it's already out of control, so I'm willing to pass it off as one guy who got a bug up his ass one day and decided to do something stupid.

Does it suck? Yes. If someone really wanted to make it an issue- they probably could.

But, as someone mentioned, this is the risk you take when you push the boundaries. I support people who take those risks, and feel for them when they are unfairly pushed down. Enough time and pushing and those things won't be as risky anymore.

Ultimately we each still need to find our own point of balance, and what level of being out works for us.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to truesub4u)

Post #: 24

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 8:28:36 AM

truesub4u

Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
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LOL LA.. so true.. NC is full of kink and lifestyle so to speak... to be so intolerable about it..

_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 25

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 8:39:10 AM

bklynbbw

Posts: 147
Joined: 10/19/2005
Status: offline

Riotgirl....I love your posts....always make me smile....(OK....they make me crack up laughing) we seem to have the same sence of humor.....although Im a bit shy about posting...<smile> I just saw where the gorgia dom posted 7...yes 7...times in a row on another thread. where are the mods LOL

(in reply to RiotGirl)

Post #: 26

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 8:49:29 AM

RiotGirl

Posts: 3149
Status: offline

quote:

Riotgirl....I love your posts....always make me smile....(OK....they make me crack up laughing) we seem to have the same sence of humor.....although Im a bit shy about posting... I just saw where the gorgia dom posted 7...yes 7...times in a row on another thread. where are the mods LOL

Awwww dont be shy!! Whats the worse they can do to you? Other then of course the millions of things <grins> Glad it cracks you up to.. its always nice to hear that i've affected others in a positive manner! What a dweeb that GA person

(in reply to bklynbbw)

Post #: 27

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 8:53:25 AM

TNstepsout

Posts: 1558
Joined: 8/3/2005
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I have to say I agree with those who think the behavior was completely out of line. A mall is a public place with people of all different cultures, religions, backgrounds etc... and it would be wholly inappropriate if everyone just started pushing their lifestyle agenda onto everyone else. What's next? People start falling to their knees and speaking in tongues, sprinkling holy water on passers by? Will animal rights activists wear bloody fur coats or feminists burn bras outside of Spencers? What if it had been a neo-Nazi with an African American on a leash?

The world is full of people with strong beliefs and personal agendas. Many of them believe it is their mission to educate and enlighten the rest of us. But there is an appropriate time, place and way to make others aware of alternate ways of living, thinking and expressing oneself. Forcing your differences on others in a public place full of families and children is not it.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 28

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 9:04:57 AM

SweetEscravo

Posts: 193
Joined: 12/17/2005
Status: offline

Personally, I would never go that far in public, just because I don't like to force things onto people. It almost seems like some people do that for the shock factor- and that is definitly not me. I am in this lifestyle because it makes me happy. I don't need to shout it from the rooftops or show it off.

I do admire the people who have the guts to be obvious and open about their sexualities or kinks, but I think there is a time and a place. Sure, it would be nice if everyone accepted everyone, but I don't see that happening any time soon. I don't think there is any need to be that obvious in a place where young children are. It puts the parents in a bad situation. When I have children, I sure won't be exposing anything to them until I feel they are old enough and mature enough- then maybe I will explain why my husband and I are the way we are. But there is no need for something that kinky in a public mall. It's just disrespectful.

Although I must say, I would have loved to see it.

(in reply to Proprietrix)

Post #: 29

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 9:11:15 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SweetEscravo
But there is no need for something that kinky in a public mall. It's just disrespectful.

Although I must say, I would have loved to see it.

There's a difference between saying something you consider to be uncomfortable for you and not something you feel younger people should see (even though Claire's sell handcuff jewelry and other kinky accoutrement and markets directly to the 8-16 crowd), and suggesting that it's actually disrespectful to do so.

What makes you consider it disrespectful? Would you also consider it disrespectful for someone to wear a sari? Or a priests robes? Again- we don't have any evidence of any overt sexual or kink behavior here.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to SweetEscravo)

Post #: 30

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 9:11:45 AM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: truesub4u

I know this is more ifnormation that should of been given last night... but it was 2 am... and OWNED was picking on me in IMs making me lose my train of thought on my post... so it's her fault... LOL

Hey now.

It was 3am and you should have been in bed.

Having said that, Maybe the mall folks asked them to remove the leashes first? Were you able to hear their conversation? While I wouldn't mind seeing folks walk around leashed, I would be troubled to have to explain that to my inquisitive little nephews. I think they practiced poor judgment and lacked decorum by doing that.

I can see it now - new signs going up everywhere:
"No shirt, no shoes, no service. Check leashes at the door."

(in reply to truesub4u)

Post #: 31

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 9:14:15 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

You know, if you want to wear a collar in public or anything else (or lack thereof) in public you have to be able to stand up for your right to wear it and to deal with any backlash to it.

I'm not going to say its right or wrong simply that those involved will need to defend themselves and live with the consequences of their choices. Perhaps they will continue to walk in the mall on leashes ad if so maybe they want to stir things up and make some legal challenge and I believe this would be their rights as citizens (if they are citizens) to do so.

I'd say the same about a woman in a radical Islamic country who refused to wear a burka -- she knows the social customs and the laws and she makes a choice that she hopefully has to live with (though in this case living may not be allowed).

I'd say the same about a guy who wears a t-shirt with a naked woman on it to church -- he knows the customs and he makes his choice.

ETC

I can't control what other people do and as for influence, if I have any, I hope it comes from how I live as well as what I say.

For me, the most important matter is that I am honest with myself and that I am myself. Leashes in public, fetish clothing public or private, they have little to no value to me so this issue never comes up.

Now if someone easedropped and complained when they heard Fox call me Mistress or complained because he carries all the packages, opens all the doors, and gives me little bows, then I'd tell them to mind their own business.

I fear I may start wandering even farther from the OP if I continue.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to truesub4u)

Post #: 32

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 9:14:41 AM

truesub4u

Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
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LOL... check leashes at the door.....

Tosses OWNED an grannysmith for her lunch bag... and my daughters crutches.....you the only one I know who can drop an Iron on her own toe... LOL

_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 33

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 9:15:01 AM

Proprietrix

Posts: 756
Joined: 7/15/2005
From: Ohio/West Virginia
Status: offline

I don't understand what's so difficult about "explaining it to the children".
"Mommy, why is that person wearing a leash?"
"Because he wants to."
Well now, that was simple enough.

_____________________________

IMO, IMHO, YMMV, AFAIK, to me, I see it as, from my perspective, it's been my experience, I only speak for myself, (and all other disclaimers here).

(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 34

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 9:17:10 AM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: truesub4u

LOL... check leashes at the door.....

Tosses OWNED an grannysmith for her lunch bag... and my daughters crutches.....you the only one I know who can drop an Iron on her own toe... LOL

Oh hush now. LOL.. It hurts.

(in reply to truesub4u)

Post #: 35

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 9:19:17 AM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix

I don't understand what's so difficult about "explaining it to the children".
"Mommy, why is that person wearing a leash?"
"Because he wants to."
Well now, that was simple enough.

Proprietrix, I always love your posts...but apparently all the kids you know are satisfied with just one answer!!!

Why does she want to?
Is she going for a walk?
Can I wear a leash?
Can I leash my brother?
Does Daddy put YOU on a leash?
Why? Why not?
Can I wear a leash to school?
Why does she want to be on a leash again?
Why is she walking behind him instead of next to him?
Why is her head down?
Why?
Why?
Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

LOL

(in reply to Proprietrix)

Post #: 36

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 9:22:44 AM

truesub4u

Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix

I don't understand what's so difficult about "explaining it to the children".
"Mommy, why is that person wearing a leash?"
"Because he wants to."
Well now, that was simple enough.

Now I can agree with this... I go through life saying there are things I do not want my own exposed to... but I can't stop it out side my home.. so when they are.. I tell them... just like I did this weekend. I told them.. straight up... my oldest did throw me with the.. Oh like you are mom.. the youngest just thought it was wrong to be tosssed out for expressing themselves. My profile even states I do not want mine exposed to this life... IN MY HOME.... but like Proprietrix said... just point blank tell them... it's closed minded people that get all flustered.. and try to be around the bush... and explain something they know nothing about.... this only makes it more confusing... if you don't know.. a simple.. I don't know why... or because they want to...

_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

(in reply to Proprietrix)

Post #: 37

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 9:36:45 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

Would you walk into a church during Sunday morning services wearing a T-shirt that says "I only worship Satan"?

Would you walk into an all black event wearing a T-shirt that says " I hate N_ _ _ _ _ s"?

Would you walk into a gay bar with a shirt that says "Homos deserve to die"?

Just a few examples but if you answered no to the above, why would then think it would be ok to flaunt your kink in a predominantly vanilla setting?

It all really boils down to common courtesy and the respect of other's differing views. I'm a biker but I have never felt the need to don all my leather gear and my "Fuck the World" T'shirt to attend a PTA meeting. I've also never felt the need to shove my kink in vanilla people's faces. I know who I am and I don't need the reaction of the world to validate that.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to truesub4u)

Post #: 38

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 10:00:18 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin
It all really boils down to common courtesy and the respect of other's differing views. I'm a biker but I have never felt the need to don all my leather gear and my "Fuck the World" T'shirt to attend a PTA meeting. I've also never felt the need to shove my kink in vanilla people's faces. I know who I am and I don't need the reaction of the world to validate that.

I agree completely. However, they stated that this was a mall- a public mish mashing of all people and where lots of cultures and expressions are expected with very little care given to outlandish clothes. As well this particular mall stated as selling kinky supplies and being open to sexual/alt people.

Wearing kinky clothes and even leashes don't seem to be flaunting in that particular context.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 39

RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... - 5/2/2006 10:22:57 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
I agree completely. However, they stated that this was a mall- a public mish mashing of all people and where lots of cultures and expressions are expected with very little care given to outlandish clothes. As well this particular mall stated as selling kinky supplies and being open to sexual/alt people.

Wearing kinky clothes and even leashes don't seem to be flaunting in that particular context.

Public expression of one's sexuality, at least in this country, is something that is unfortunately, still frowned upon by the vast majority. Especially when it comes to anything that is considered by society as being "deviating from the norm". I mean come on folks, we are so far behind that as simple an expression of affection shared between two people as hand holding or a kiss will draw stares, negative commentary and looks of disgust if that exchange happens between people of the same gender...or of two different races. I am not saying that's right...I'm just saying it just is. So in a crowded mall where there is a myriad of different culture and age groups, it is even more important sometimes, at least for myself, to at least be as inoffensive to others as I can.

Just because Lover's Lane sells dildos, it doesn't make it an appropriate place to go in to and drop trou and shove one up your ass any more than it would be appropriate to build your new garage inside a Home Depot store.

I know that collars and leashes are tame to folks like you and I, and you're right, I don't consider it to be outlandishly flaunting....but to some others that might be way out there on the edge.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 40

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