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RE: older men - 2/6/2011 9:55:32 AM   
graceadieu


Posts: 1518
Joined: 3/20/2008
From: Maryland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: keepmehard

why do subs say that age is a factor? it sseems to me a lot of subs are just looking for boyfriends, not an experienced master


It's true that plenty of people in this lifestyle are looking for a partner in all areas of their life, and may have a hard time taking a guy their parents' or grandparent's age home to meet the folks! Or just be squicked by the idea of having sex someone old enough to be their mom or dad. There's really nothing wrong with that as far as I can see, but maybe I'm just biased because that's how I feel....

(in reply to keepmehard)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: older men - 2/6/2011 9:55:45 AM   
MrRodgers


Posts: 10542
Joined: 7/30/2005
Status: offline
Can't edit my last but let's be honest people...

First there is the gut...almost all have them,

...then there is the balding spot IF there is any hair left.

...then there is the spontaneous naps.

...then there is the deafness...can't hear shit.

...and let's not forget the walker or wheelchair.

..teeth in or teeth out if he doesn't forget them. (I tell my women...just leave theirs out)

I wouldn't want an older man either...ya think ?

(in reply to TotalDiscipline)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: older men - 2/6/2011 10:14:12 AM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I'm really glad you said this.

You know, it occurs to Me that someday (in 20+ years) I am also going to be a senior citizen.  At that point in My life, chances are that there is going to be somebody out there who is at least twenty years younger than Me, who is more appealing to play with, and who has a much greater longevity factor for a long term relationship.  When that time comes, I am going to have to accept the fact that it's somebody else's stage and I've already had My turn.


Greetings LadyPact,

Your response is the best answer I've seen thus far on this subject. While it crops up quite frequently, I've never encountered anyone that accepts the inevitable and does it with the grace you've articulated. Well stated.

Namaste,

~porcelaine


_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: older men - 2/7/2011 4:24:49 PM   
nakedplaything


Posts: 28
Joined: 1/11/2011
Status: offline
peppermint, i totally agree with what people are saying to the op. but the bit about him finding a male submisive -  you didnt actually mean that literally did you? its hard to tell sometimes with the written word. are you actually suggesting that he simply gets a male sub to cater for his bdsm desires? please tell me your not.

(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: older men - 2/7/2011 5:33:00 PM   
Twoshoes


Posts: 1218
Joined: 7/27/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I'm really glad you said this.

You know, it occurs to Me that someday (in 20+ years) I am also going to be a senior citizen.  At that point in My life, chances are that there is going to be somebody out there who is at least twenty years younger than Me, who is more appealing to play with, and who has a much greater longevity factor for a long term relationship.  When that time comes, I am going to have to accept the fact that it's somebody else's stage and I've already had My turn.


Greetings LadyPact,

Your response is the best answer I've seen thus far on this subject. While it crops up quite frequently, I've never encountered anyone that accepts the inevitable and does it with the grace you've articulated. Well stated.

Namaste,

~porcelaine



+1

(in reply to porcelaine)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: older men - 2/7/2011 5:33:27 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: nakedplaything

peppermint, i totally agree with what people are saying to the op. but the bit about him finding a male submisive -  you didnt actually mean that literally did you? its hard to tell sometimes with the written word. are you actually suggesting that he simply gets a male sub to cater for his bdsm desires? please tell me your not.


NPT, this is the post you're referring to: 
quote:

ORIGINAL: peppermint

You also have preferences.  You want a female submissive.  What is wrong with a male submissive?  Shouldn't a Master be able to Master anyone, males as well as females?  This is not all about sex you know.  You could Master a male submissive for your sadistic leanings and find a vanilla female for the sex part if you are straight. 

We all have preferences.  Some want their partner to live within a certain distance.  Others have certain height requirements.  Many are only attracted to people with a certain body type or a certain color of hair.  There are people who only want a certain race.  Strangely, we get young Doms complaining in the forums that the submissives want older Masters.  Some want to marry their partner and have a family.  There are even some who just want a regular partner to play with, no strings attached.  A submissive does not HAVE to accept any Dom, Dick, or Harry, of any age, of any size, no matter where they live,not matter what the conditions just because that person claims to be a Master. 

I am very sorry if you are finding it difficult to find a submissive.  To be quite frank, according to my male friends it is very difficult to find someone when you are over 60 let alone almost 70.  This is especially true if you would prefer to find someone younger.  Many looked for years before finding someone.  You have been a member here for a month.  Rome was not built in a day, and submissive are not found in a month when you are over 60, or any age for that matter.

I do understand the problems of older Doms and submissives.  Gary is going to be 70 in a few days and I will be 60 soon.  I do understand the difficulties of finding partners at our age.  It is especially difficult for older males as there are so many more of them than older kinky females.  However, whining as your first post in a forum will not make you more attractive to any submissive. 

Remember this please.  Until a submissive has agreed to be YOUR submissive and agrees to wear YOUR collar, the submissive has the rights to have any preferences he/she might have for whatever reasons he/she has for those preferences. 



My take is that peppermint was simply reminding the OP that since he is complaining about younger female subs having preferences, he should realize that he himself has preferences.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to nakedplaything)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: older men - 2/7/2011 6:32:37 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5169
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline
quote:


My take is that peppermint was simply reminding the OP that since he is complaining about younger female subs having preferences, he should realize that he himself has preferences.



Thank you, Steven.  That is exactly the point I was trying to make. 

But heck, why can't a straight male top play with a male bottom?  Sex does not have to be part of the play nor does it make the straight male top a homosexual or even bi if he enjoys BDSM with other males. 

However, that is neither here nor there.  The point was that he "could" use a male for BDSM play and a vanilla woman for sex.  It is a viable alternative if the OP would give up HIS preferences. 

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: older men - 2/7/2011 6:41:19 PM   
dcnovice


Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
Status: offline
This is not exactly on topic, but I love the story. The guy who told it swears it was true.

He was working the registration desk at a BDSM workshop in the Rose Room at a local hotel. A sweet little old lady came to the door.

"I'm sorry, ma'am, the Garden Club is in the Magnolia Room, just down the hall."

"Oh," she replied, "Is this the BDSM workshop?"

Taken aback that the group's efforts at discretion appeared to be for naught, he mumbled, "Yes."

"Well," she smiled, "I think then I'll have myself a seat."


_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: older men - 2/7/2011 6:50:24 PM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
Not exactly on topic, but something I think applies.

It seems that a lot of people see anyone older who emails them as someone who wants a scene relationship with them.

Now, I'm quite happy with my situation and I'm not on CollarMe to make conquests.  My major goal is to be helpful so when I see a profile that asks for information, particularly on the offline community, I send a polite note with a bit of information and an offer of more if it is desired.

It's amazing how many "deleted unread" comments I see appearing in my outgoing mailbox.  It's generally young women but numerous men have chosen to not even look at of what the email consisted.  I admit it's their loss, but at the same time, it's frustrating, particularly since I'll rarely email anyone who hadn't indicated that they wanted information.


_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to dcnovice)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: older men - 2/7/2011 6:59:40 PM   
LPslittleclip


Posts: 1163
Joined: 9/29/2007
Status: offline
i was not looking for a certain age when i was looking i was keeping my options open i do understand that some want partners in a age range. i have met many older Domm/es that i have learned from but i found my MIstress and i mesh in so many more ways than just kink it turned out i am slightly older than Her but it did not matter i am her collared slave and i am proud to be Hers

_____________________________

proud to serve the awsome
LadyPact

(in reply to dcnovice)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: older men - 2/7/2011 7:35:14 PM   
HisSexyBrat


Posts: 16
Joined: 1/31/2011
Status: offline
why do subs say that age is a factor? it sseems to me a lot of subs are just looking for boyfriends, not an experienced master

Is it the sub? OR is it the Dom?

No Offense but some younger subs don't want a Master with the OLD Balls! Some subs don't want a Master that has to take Viagra to keep it up. As subs we will get old and need to remember we will get old<er> as well. As a Dom it may be better to keep a sub that is within 5-10 years younger or older.

Happy hunting KMH

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: older men - 2/7/2011 11:17:56 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5169
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren

Not exactly on topic, but something I think applies.

It seems that a lot of people see anyone older who emails them as someone who wants a scene relationship with them.



There are many times I have written a long mail to someone only to delete it before sending.  What is the sense when you know in your heart that the person really doesn't want to hear what you are saying?  I try to remember back when I was in my 20s.  I am not sure I would have taken advice from someone I consider a senior citizen.  Heck, I don't think I had any conversation with someone that age unless it was my grandma. 

Experience is the greatest teacher.  Everyone must learn on his/her own.  No matter what others tell them it's not fact until it's proven to be fact by the real experience. 

(in reply to JohnWarren)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: older men - 2/9/2011 7:46:34 PM   
CelticPrince


Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline
quote:

You also have preferences. You want a female submissive. What is wrong with a male submissive? Shouldn't a Master be able to Master anyone, males as well as females? This is not all about sex you know. You could Master a male submissive for your sadistic leanings and find a vanilla female for the sex part if you are straight.

We all have preferences. Some want their partner to live within a certain distance. Others have certain height requirements. Many are only attracted to people with a certain body type or a certain color of hair. There are people who only want a certain race. Strangely, we get young Doms complaining in the forums that the submissives want older Masters. Some want to marry their partner and have a family. There are even some who just want a regular partner to play with, no strings attached. A submissive does not HAVE to accept any Dom, Dick, or Harry, of any age, of any size, no matter where they live,not matter what the conditions just because that person claims to be a Master.

I am very sorry if you are finding it difficult to find a submissive. To be quite frank, according to my male friends it is very difficult to find someone when you are over 60 let alone almost 70. This is especially true if you would prefer to find someone younger. Many looked for years before finding someone. You have been a member here for a month. Rome was not built in a day, and submissive are not found in a month when you are over 60, or any age for that matter.

I do understand the problems of older Doms and submissives. Gary is going to be 70 in a few days and I will be 60 soon. I do understand the difficulties of finding partners at our age. It is especially difficult for older males as there are so many more of them than older kinky females. However, whining as your first post in a forum will not make you more attractive to any submissive.

Remember this please. Until a submissive has agreed to be YOUR submissive and agrees to wear YOUR collar, the submissive has the rights to have any preferences he/she might have for whatever reasons he/she has for those preferences.


pepper,

as usual, your comments are right on the mark.......lets hope that he ponders your thoughts.

CP

(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: older men - 2/9/2011 8:29:22 PM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline
OP dont worry about your profile. I have changed my tons of times. What crappy advice go find yourself a man submissive. How old you are dosent mean anything. So the younger women want to stay in their age range. There are always some young ones who dont care about how old you are. If your going to change anything change your attitude period. It boils my blood to see guys any age cry on here that they cant find a woman. Im 66 years old and I have guys asking me to fix them up with women. Immaturity seems to be the norm on here. OP go over the advice that is on here and find what fits you and trash the rest. One last bit of advice Change your attitude period. Mellow out.

(in reply to CelticPrince)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: older men - 2/9/2011 8:34:22 PM   
Palliata


Posts: 371
Joined: 8/9/2010
Status: offline
You know this is the opposite of the thread I thought I was going to read. I've several times run across subs who only want to play with guys significantly older than them - young guys are inexperienced, as the wisdom goes, not to be trusted. I've also seen multiple 20-something doms complaining about not being given a chance because of their age. What I have NOT seen before was the opposite - older doms complaining about not getting their "due." Anyone else slightly perplexed by that?

_____________________________

I speak not of The Way, but only My Way. Think it not an indictment of Your Way.

I'm male. I know it sounds female. Work with me.

(in reply to CelticPrince)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: older men - 2/9/2011 8:44:29 PM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline
getting their DUE. LMAO Thats a good one. Palliata if you thought you've it all just stick around for a while.

(in reply to Palliata)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: older men - 2/9/2011 8:54:36 PM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

And it looks like a lot of old guys are just looking for someone to keep them hard.


Crikeys, You say this like it's a bad thing, this wanting to stay hard.  :-)

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to Aileen1968)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: older men - 2/10/2011 7:57:00 AM   
xelinda


Posts: 9
Joined: 1/31/2011
Status: offline
I prefer men who are older than me. It's my own personal preference.

I never knew my father. He passed away when I was two, and after my mother passed away when I was 8, I was sent to a home where I wasn't loved. My childhood wasn't about being a kid. It was about survival. Even in my young adult relationships, I have always prefered the company of friends, male and female, who were about 10 years older. I didn't get into all of the silly childish partying.

For me, I feel safer and more secure with an older man. Experience is part of it, but not the only thing I seek. Maybe I am just older mentally... Shrugs... It is what it is....

(in reply to Kana)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: older men - 2/10/2011 8:17:01 AM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aynne88

quote:

ORIGINAL: RCdc


quote:

ORIGINAL: keepmehard

why do subs say that age is a factor? it sseems to me a lot of subs are just looking for boyfriends, not an experienced master


Age does not equal experience.


Exactly. My man is 17 years older than I am but I have more 'experience" in the whole BDSM world than he does. Also, to the OP, clean your apartment or domicile or wherever that abode is. Seriously for me that slovenly background was the biggest turn off. Ick. I don't want to hook up with a slob and most women I know don't either. Just some advice.



Aynne, that's why I always look for ; "Serving as a Maid" on the left side of a sub/ slave's profile.
After we get the dumpster filled up it's only about 20 minutes a day to do all the chores.

_____________________________

"But Your Honor, this is not a Jury of my Peers, these people are all decent, honest, law-abiding citizens!"

(in reply to Aynne88)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: older men - 2/10/2011 12:48:31 PM   
MercTech


Posts: 3706
Joined: 7/4/2006
Status: offline
Age... I'm more into common interests.
If I catch something in a journal or profile that sparks my interest, I'll message about it.
If you say something in a forum that strikes a chord, I may send a cmail.

Occasionally, someone writes back very offended that an old fart with very varied vanilla interests would dare to message them. que sera...

Age ... irrelevant to conversation. Ignorance... a big blocker to interlocution.

Stefan

(in reply to popeye1250)
Profile   Post #: 80
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