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new to all of this - 1/25/2011 12:11:48 PM   
dkimb


Posts: 1
Joined: 1/25/2011
Status: offline 		I have been asked to be collared. And am not real sure what all that means. I have read a few things on the web. But really wanted to get some ones view point. He is married and that is fine with me for now.
What I want to know is what will he expect from me in general and what will he expect of me.
Some one please give me some good info
Thank you
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: new to all of this - 1/25/2011 12:21:51 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Only he can answer that. If you don't understand something or the person you are involved with... can you expect that all will go well if you rush in before you are aware of what you are actually doing? You come asking questions that we cannot answer... when really, you must be answering a few questions yourself. What can you expect from rushing in?

A collar means different things to different people. Many players online will have a collar a week or by the month. It means little to them. It's an ego boost and a way to feel all domly or submissive like. To others it is like a marriage.

At the moment I would advise you to find out what you expect before you enter something worried about what they might expect. Just in all things in life, if you walk in a place where you are unaware, you may have a price to pay for that unawareness. Do you wish to play at life or live it?

Either way... ask him. You might want to ask his wife as well.


_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to dkimb)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: new to all of this - 1/25/2011 12:23:32 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		Wow. Ok, first off, you should not be considering getting "collared" if you know nothing about it.

Two: just because a man tells you something, it is not necessary to act upon it until you understand what it is you are agreeing to.

Three: no one can tell you what a man expects from you except for him. Ask him.

(in reply to dkimb)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: new to all of this - 1/25/2011 12:38:24 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		Like Lockit says, collaring means different things to different people. Ask him what it means to him.

I highly recommend you get the wife's phone number and talk to her. If he hesitates for an instant before giving out her phone number, this will be very telling.

(in reply to dkimb)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: new to all of this - 1/25/2011 12:59:14 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		As politely as possible - what are you trying to accomplish? You're going out with a married man, which has all kinds of red flags, and you asked him to make the relationship semipermanent without any idea of what that means. What's your fgoal here?

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: new to all of this - 1/25/2011 2:17:53 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Ask him what he would want you to do that he hasn't asked you to do already. Tell him what it is you wouldn't do no matter what. Are you willing to have him pimp you out? Play with others and let him watch via cam? Are you allowed to date since he has a primary partner?

For that matter, does his wife know about you? Is she okay with him seeing you? Are you going to have to do all the traveling to meet him and pay for the hotel room each time so she doesn't find out about you?


_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: new to all of this - 1/25/2011 2:27:23 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		Here are earlier threads on the significance of collaring:
http://www.collarchat.com/m_2598867/mpage_1/tm.htm#2598867
http://www.collarchat.com/m_3287436/mpage_1/tm.htm#3287436



< Message edited by kalikshama -- 1/25/2011 2:35:33 PM >

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: new to all of this - 1/25/2011 2:42:23 PM   
0ldhen


Posts: 2221
Joined: 12/27/2010
From: Henhouse in Trolltopia, Harleyville USA
Status: offline
Is this real life real time or only online?

_____________________________

Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't.

Za'beeta Regal, Et Vogo O' Lurwadra'd Wyka Go Abosh Inunsey.

(in reply to dkimb)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: new to all of this - 1/25/2011 6:56:39 PM   
Huntertn


Posts: 715
Joined: 10/7/2006
Status: offline 		lol..has tobe be online only or she'd know a bit more don't you think?

(in reply to 0ldhen)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: new to all of this - 1/25/2011 7:22:52 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		Your join date says today...so you either know him realtime and for much longer than a day and just have poor communication skills or you've actually just joined today and have fallen for the first troll that came into your inbox. Both options point to poor life skills.

_____________________________



(in reply to dkimb)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: new to all of this - 1/28/2011 4:40:01 AM   
subsfaith


Posts: 297
Joined: 11/21/2006
Status: offline 		This reminds me when my daughter was about four years old... I asked "Do you want to go to ballet lessons?"  She joy up and down in joy "YAY - Ballets lessons" followed by two minutes later, "Mummy what's ballet?"

OP - You are right to ask the question, however you are asking the wrong people.  The only person who can tell you what collared means in this circustance is the man who asked you. 

I do know that some people view collaring the same as marriage (obviously not this chap though LOL).  Some people will be offered a collar after a few hours, and for others a collar is something that is earned over several years, and there are also lots inbetween.  For me, it means nothing, I don't subscribe to this socially constructed concept.



(in reply to Aileen1968)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: new to all of this - 1/28/2011 5:00:45 AM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

He is married and that is fine with me for now.


This made me pause.... hmmm.. for now?

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to dkimb)
Profile   Post #: 12
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