VaguelyCurious
Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009 From: United Kingdom Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: RCdc Hi VC! quote:
Of course there's sexual inequality - different things appeal to men and women, quick, call the papers!  I know ya being sarcastic , but that's not sexual inequality, that's just personal preference. While there is a generalisation of men v. women it's not strictly across the board. I meant 'inequality' in the sense that the two are different - in general men do need to behave differently to women on a dating site - and that's due to a generalised 'personal preference' we imagine all women to have (i.e. face-photos only, profile text you wouldn't be ashamed to read to your great-grandma, emotions.) and all men to have (as much sexiness and as few limits as possible, 'cuz all men are horndogs, yanno! ). So the methods for approaching this general man and the general woman are going to be different. (and I can't believe that I've been on this site long enough that I'm using a word like 'horndog'. All y'all are a bad influence.) quote:
I'm not saying that I'm 'surprised' by this form of sexism... after all this is just a site of basically vanilla folk who practice BDSM... in other words it's no different from everyday life where sexism exists. But I do think there is a more knee jerk reaction to male v. female posters that is more prevalent in recent times (say... the last year or two) and it's becoming progressively more noticeable. Personal preference is one thing - but are we making sexism 'acceptable' by contributing to generalisations? Having only been here a year I can't comment on any overarching trend, but I reckon that given that we're on a dating site (sort of, heh), and questions like the OP's revolve around dating (*cough cough*) those generalisations are kind of handy for people to know if you tone them down a bit from where I was exaggerating above. Men come onto the Ask A Mistress board and want to know why women are ignoring their highly sexual first memos - are we supposed to tell them that their way of expressing themselves is just fine and not mention that they'll get much better responses from women if they tone it down, because that would be contributing to generalisations? It's contributing to the generalisation, sure, but it's also more likely to get them laid than telling them to carry on as they are because we won't judge them them would be Highly sexual male behaviour directed at women seems to irritate women (in general) in a way that highly sexual female behaviour directed at men doesn't seem to irritate men (in general). Are you asking the men to pretend to be narked when they aren't, or the women to pretend not to be narked when they are? Or both to a lesser extent? Because those are basically the three options if you want to treat highly sexualised men and women equally, and none of them really look great. quote:
Fuck it's too early here for this discussion.... Heyyyyyyyy, nobody's *making* you post in the morning!
_____________________________
Sthetic on FetLife.
|