RE: "Willing to relocate" (Full Version)

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GreedyTop -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 12:05:16 PM)

~FR~..

if I am in sub mode, it's ok for me to be willing to relocate.  If I am in toppy mode, it's not.  ok, got it..  *rolls eyes*




CreativeDominant -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 12:17:45 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

After browsing around on the other side, this is something that keeps popping up on profiles... willing to relocate. That little phrase makes me pause. I know many people who have relocated, me being one. And while im struggling not to make a judgement call, it seems to me that, at least for a dominant, the willingness to relocate speaks a bit about that person.

Am i the only one who gets that niggling feeling?
Tis a touchy subject for me.  Up until my kids were grown, the answer would have been "No...I will not relocate".  Yes, I was divorced and they lived with their mother but I was determined to be a father in a more substantial way than monetarily.

Once they were grown, they were no longer a totally viable reason for not relocating.  Yes, seeing them is important to me but let's face it...there are oodles of kids allllllllllll over this country who live far away from their parents.  No...the biggest reason for me became the fact that I had a practice that was building again, despite all that my ex did to ruin it.  Add in the fact that I was 51 when my youngest was finally out of child support.  Try looking at the idea of studying for state boards in another state, then taking them, passing them, selling my practice here, starting another one there along with the dynamic/relationship that I have moved for and it stayed easiest for me to state that I would not relocate...

Then the inevitable happened...I met someone who, when push came to shove, I realized that I would move for.  But...we ended.  Now...when I look at it, I look at the expense in moving all that equipment, taking the boards, paying for the new license, the struggle of setting up a new practice and once again, my belief is that I would not.  But...she taught me to never say never.




Chulain -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 12:19:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum
But of course it's 3 simple easy to understand words. Anyone who understands English and is NOT a conspiracy theory WHACK job.

It must be hard going through life convinced so many people are conspiracy theory whack jobs.




SailingBum -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 12:29:08 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Chulain

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum
But of course it's 3 simple easy to understand words. Anyone who understands English and is NOT a conspiracy theory WHACK job.

It must be hard going through life convinced so many people are conspiracy theory whack jobs.



REALLY! It's not that difficult. Although I am starting to wonder about you.

BadOne




MalcolmNathaniel -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 12:51:20 PM)

I have already decided to move.  I'm just sick and tired of this location.  I simply haven't decided where to move to, nor have I found a job in someplace I'm interested in.  Besides which, I can code anywhere I have a computer and a net connection.  Anything I can't will have to be done on site which means I would be traveling anyway.

Having a connection to another location would steer me in that direction.  It does not mean that I'm willing to move immediately and set up house in a woman's apartment on the spur of the moment and take over.  That would be ridiculous.




DesFIP -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 12:55:37 PM)

Oh and although The Man moved up here, we had been ldr for four years when he did that.We had both said we would be willing to relocate under certain circumstances. Not immediately for either of us but eventually.




VaguelyCurious -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 1:14:00 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Chulain

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum
Jeez some of you folks are reading wayyyyyy to much into a couple simple words. My work is such that I could relocate easily. My family is another story. Also I need to be near the water for sailing. However If I ticked the relocate box it would mean that I am willing to move nothing more.

And of course everyone is like you.


He didn't say anything of the sort. In fact, he didn't even vaguely imply that. He just provided a set of circumstances other than creepy-basement-dwelling that might lead him to tick 'relocate', and pointed out that anyone who assumed basement-dwelling-dom from that is reading too much into it.

You're jumping on him over nothing.




oceanwynds2 -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 1:18:44 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

~FR~..

if I am in sub mode, it's ok for me to be willing to relocate.  If I am in toppy mode, it's not.  ok, got it..  *rolls eyes*


Yikes that could be dangerous...one leg in one place and the other leg somewhere else and you split down the middle...oh my :) Sometimes i have a crazy visual sense of humour.

OP, Relocating is an option that some can do and in my book nothing wrong with that. It does not flash red flags or any thing. It is a condition, with nothing more.




GreedyTop -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 1:24:26 PM)

*snort*
I've NEVER been able to do a 'split'..

how are you, Wyndie?




kalikshama -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 1:42:41 PM)

quote:

I have never seen a female dominant state in her profile that she is prepared to relocate and yet I have seen plenty of dominant men making that statement. Is that because women in general prefer to stay closer to their families?


Just wildly speculating here - I know men who are deliberately vague so as not to get ruled out before they have a chance to sell themselves. This might come under that category.

Him: what are you into?
Her: blah blah blah
Him: why, so am I!

Him (on plentyoffish) for the right woman, I'd be monogamous

(I do not suggest that my anecdotes are statistically significant.)




oceanwynds2 -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 1:55:11 PM)

Greedy, I never could do the split either..
I am doing great ...just counting the months down till I am living in Florida again..I love St Augustine!!

Thank you for asking
oceanwynds




Icarys -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 2:04:12 PM)

quote:

I once had in my profile "old fat and ugly homebody seeking same - must be willing to relocate to me." I received lots of mail along the lines of, "before I move in, how ugly are you?" People were actually jumping on the chance to relocate... That's creepy.

Sometimes people are looking for a change of scenery..I used to move for the fun of a new place when I was younger. Different town, state and so on. Hey, 25 states and numerous towns later I feel I've sown my oats in that department and have but one move left.

Nothing has to be creepy about it unless a person wants to perceive it that way.

Sometimes a person might feel they're becoming too complacent.
They just might be the adventurous type like myself.

I have relocated on occasion and found it a romantic gesture. Since my priority is the relationships health and the people in it..I've just never seen anything wrong with it..






NocturnalStalker -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 2:18:39 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

Could be the dom lives in a crappy northern climate and wants to move someplace warm to get out of the snow?


What a pussy.




mnottertail -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 2:21:18 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

Could be the dom lives in a crappy northern climate and wants to move someplace warm to get out of the snow?


Or lives in a crappy northern climate and his basement is already overflowing with the acid barrels and remains of those gone before?




windchymes -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 2:22:26 PM)

Just so happens my mouth is vacant at the moment...... [;)]




seekingOwnertoo -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 2:23:23 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

some folks are more free to relocate than others, regardless of any orientation. This may be due to family stuff (divorced parent, or not), employment possibilities (especially in the current job market), other familial respnsibilities.   If that stuff doesnt apply, then why shouldnt they be willing to relocate other than personal choice?



This is true. Some folks are more free to relocate than others, and orientation is not part of the decision.

Myself, I am single, have no children and in a profession that is HIGHLY relocatable. So I am not restricted to geography. And you might notice, have checked "willing to relocate" on my profile.

That said, relocation for a relationship is a very serious decision.

Long distance romance is full of fraught and peril because you don't see each other regularly enough to really know what you are getting yourself into.

If one is moving to you, then you are taking some responsibility for that person. Likewise, if you are moving to another person, you are putting some trust into the other.

What happens if you find a couple weeks or months later ... you don't even like each other? Or one has a side you didn't even know about?

There are lots of caviets that go into it beyond ... just willing to relocate.

But that is what the box says ... [:)] ... and some people check it ... because it could happen.

If cupid does the right arrow tricks! [;)]




mnottertail -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 2:23:47 PM)

I am gonna need at least three rooms, gotta couplea boys too. 




windchymes -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 2:24:55 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

I am gonna need at least three rooms, gotta couplea boys too. 


Oh, plenty of room for those gemstones, I've had my wisdom teeth removed.




soul2share -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 2:34:53 PM)

Well, I'm one that, like Greedy, only has the job holding me to one place.  And it looks like I'll be looking outside the area I live in now......two places here, Tampa and Volusia County are two departments I've applied to and will have scheduled tests for.  I have no idea what's in the future.....relocation is an option, not for the Dom, but for the job.   Kind of sucks, since I ended up here to avoid being unemployed!  Got my first paycheck.....I made more on unemployment!  WTF????????

I did know one Dom who wanted to relocate here to FL, we'd been a couple in AZ......however, I learned from another sub there that he was currently unemployed, and looking for a sub to support him.  So, I laid it out for him.....he's NOT living with me, he WILL have a job and provide equal cash for bills, and since he'd been playing with anyone who would, he'd better produce a clean STD test.  Well, he's still there......apparently, he wasn't expecting me to go all assertive on him......s'prise!!!!!!!!  I am NOT supporting anyone, period.  My money is mine.....stingy, yeah, bitchy, yeah, do I care?....hell, no.




kalikshama -> RE: "Willing to relocate" (1/28/2011 2:39:34 PM)

quote:

I did know one Dom who wanted to relocate here to FL, we'd been a couple in AZ......however, I leared from another sub there that he was currently unemployed, and looking for a sub to support him.  So, I laid it out for him.....he's NOT living with me, he WILL have a job and provide equal cash for bills, and since he'd been playing with anyone who would, he'd better produce a clean STD test.  Well, he's still there......apparently, he wasn't expecting me to go all assertive on him......s'prise!!!!!!!!  I am NOT supporting anyone, period.  My money is mine.....stingy, yeah, bitchy, yeah, do I care?....hell, no.


You ROCK!




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