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[Poll]

D/s is about unfairness


Right as always. You're brilliance makes me so hot, Peon.
  29% (7)
Total wank as usual, Peon. When was the last time you went out?
  45% (11)
That's not the key thing, but sort of. Let me explain.
  25% (6)


Total Votes : 24
(last vote on : 1/30/2011 6:43:45 PM)
(Poll will run till: -- )
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D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 4:27:39 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Just found myself ruminating about this. For me, as a hetero sub male, the crucial thing is that a D/s relationship is unfair. It is *wrong* that some woman has superiority over me, gets to give me orders, control me, punish me for infractions . . . and so on.

And this is why I like it. This is what gives me the buzz. I love all the contradictions that it implies, no matter how much they bust logic apart.

But what say everyone else? Give your innermost thoughts and coherently argued opinion. I shall grade your post accordingly and the writer of the best response shall have his or her hair ruffled fondly.

_____________________________

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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 5:34:47 PM   
gungadin09


Posts: 3232
Joined: 3/19/2010
Status: offline 		Okay, i'm not even gonna try for the best argument. But i would have used the words "authority" and "subordination" to describe D/s, instead. To me, the fact that we're not all created equal isn't the same as "unfairness". i don't respect people who i think are unfair, and for me respect is a prerequisite for submission. i will submit to the person who is better than i am (at whatever thing), that by being associated with them, i become a better person myself. i give respect because it is earned, and i get something back in return. i'd say that's absolutely fair.

pam

< Message edited by gungadin09 -- 1/29/2011 6:05:10 PM >

(in reply to PeonForHer)
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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 5:43:39 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		I often contemplate the unfairness of my playmate having to do all the work while I just lie there, bound and helpless, quivering in ecstasy or shrieking in terror.

(in reply to PeonForHer)
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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 5:46:34 PM   
RapierFugue


Posts: 4740
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Just found myself ruminating about this. For me, as a hetero sub male, the crucial thing is that a D/s relationship is unfair. It is *wrong* that some woman has superiority over me, gets to give me orders, control me, punish me for infractions . . . and so on.

And this is why I like it. This is what gives me the buzz. I love all the contradictions that it implies, no matter how much they bust logic apart.

But what say everyone else? Give your innermost thoughts and coherently argued opinion. I shall grade your post accordingly and the writer of the best response shall have his or her hair ruffled fondly.


You're missing an option:

d) I find you fucking hi-larious, but your option selection sucks rancid badger puke from dead goat's arses ;)

(in reply to PeonForHer)
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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 5:48:44 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		It's unfair in our relationship but I don't get off on that, it's not what revves me. It is just how it is because he gets what he wants and I don't always get what I want. 

(in reply to RapierFugue)
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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 5:59:35 PM   
TreasureKY


Posts: 3032
Joined: 4/10/2007
From: Kentucky
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

For me, as a hetero sub male, the crucial thing is that a D/s relationship is unfair. It is *wrong* that some woman has superiority over me, gets to give me orders, control me, punish me for infractions . . . and so on.

And this is why I like it. This is what gives me the buzz. I love all the contradictions that it implies, no matter how much they bust logic apart.


That's cool.

For me, it isn't about fairness in our relationship.  (Heck, life isn't fair.)  We have a partnership and we are equals.  It's just that someone needs to be the leader of our relationship and have the responsibility of making final decisions... and we prefer that he be that leader and decision-maker. 

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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:02:52 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline 		our D/s relationship is what we both want. How is that unfair? 

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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:03:27 PM   
Tantriqu


Posts: 2026
Joined: 12/29/2006
Status: offline 		I was brought up 'traditionally', i.e., all females acquiesce to all males. My parents are in a morganic marriage, where my mum is considerably smarter than my dad; however, she hides it and manipulates him into thinking he makes all the decisions. It disgusted me from the moment I recognised it, and I swore to never act that way, to never live a lie or to lie so much to others.
Fortunately, with my first 'real' boyfriend, at least we had an egalitarian relationship where I didn't have to hide my brains, and we had a lot of 'I do that to you, then you do that to me' sex.
But then I discovered with him it's very arousing for me to be sexually dominant and here's the important bit, good men are aroused, sexually and emotionally, by being submissive and by serving me.
AMAZING!! I Love Fucking Good Sub Men in their Fabulously Receptive Asses! And They Do, Too! ILFSFRA! ATDT!

I'm no sadist, and I'm not interested in masochists. I couldn't enjoy doing what I do and being who I am without having someone who at least equally enjoys what I do to him. It's very restful to us both that it's all above-board and clearly communicated. Oh, and fabulous multiple orgasms all 'round.
Nifty.
Apply rufflage here: :

Edited to add: A, B and C

< Message edited by Tantriqu -- 1/29/2011 6:07:15 PM >

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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:07:26 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

my mum is considerably smarter than my dad; however, she hides it and manipulates him into thinking he makes all the decisions. It disgusted me from the moment I recognised it, and I swore to never act that way, to never live a lie or to lie so much to others.


i am not slamming your parents, Tanriqu, but i would see this type of a relationship as far more unfair than a consensual D/s relationship


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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:08:48 PM   
Tantriqu


Posts: 2026
Joined: 12/29/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

my mum is considerably smarter than my dad; however, she hides it and manipulates him into thinking he makes all the decisions. It disgusted me from the moment I recognised it, and I swore to never act that way, to never live a lie or to lie so much to others.


i am not slamming your parents, Tanriqu, but i would see this type of a relationship as far more unfair than a consensual D/s relationship



That's what I meant.

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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:09:31 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RapierFugue

d) I find you fucking hi-larious, but your option selection sucks rancid badger puke from dead goat's arses ;)



RF, I know you to be a man who will not be beaten to a fond hair-ruffling by a person of inferior intelligence, wisdom and verbiage. Please kindly explain your comment more fully!

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com


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Profile   Post #: 11
RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:12:42 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

our D/s relationship is what we both want. How is that unfair? 


I don't know! You tell me! But if I were in the right type of unfair relationship, I'd be a pretty damned happy bunny, that's all I can say.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com


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Profile   Post #: 12
RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:16:31 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer


quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

our D/s relationship is what we both want. How is that unfair? 


I don't know! You tell me! But if I were in the right type of unfair relationship, I'd be a pretty damned happy bunny, that's all I can say.
The "right type of unfair relationship" is a bit of an oxymoron, in my opinion. If it is a "right" relationship then you and your partner are both happy and satisfied, so unfairness should not be an issue.


_____________________________

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TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:18:28 PM   
Masticator


Posts: 33
Joined: 7/24/2010
Status: offline 		I wouldn't say it is about the unfairness for the sake of unfairness, but rather the unfairness is the result of the circumstances that we've both mutually and happily agreed to.

And in that regard it is perfectly fair.

The submissive gets certain pleasure or fulfillment out of giving in or submitting to the dominant and as I've heard them tell it..... the dominant's joy in this is a main catalyst of the joy the submissive achieves. The dominant gets pleasure or fulfillment out of that submission but also bears a significant level of responsibility for their partner's wellbeing. One of the ways that the stress of responsibility is soothed is by knowing that your submissive, out of devotion, respect and trust, is willing to endure unpleasantness.

Is it fair that one partner gets what they want the majority of the time and the other partner makes some sacrifices? Of course not.

Is it fair that one partner carries the weight of responsibility the majority of the time and the partner follows along? Of course not.

Do Doms have to deal with things they'd rather not? Of course.

Do subs have to deal with things they'd rather not? Of course.

In my opinion the unfairness is part of the balance. And as a female dominant the balance is tilted to my benefit, I believe. And I think we're all supposed to like it like that, right?

Incidentally I've heard quite a few (dare I suggest 'bad'?) subs complain that things aren't fair and I find it particularly interesting (yes and sexy) that you thrive on the unfairness of it all.

(in reply to PeonForHer)
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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:22:33 PM   
RapierFugue


Posts: 4740
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer


quote:

ORIGINAL: RapierFugue

d) I find you fucking hi-larious, but your option selection sucks rancid badger puke from dead goat's arses ;)



RF, I know you to be a man who will not be beaten to a fond hair-ruffling by a person of inferior intelligence, wisdom and verbiage. Please kindly explain your comment more fully!


Tell me which bit you didn't understand and I'll try to help you :)

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:24:23 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RapierFugue


quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer


quote:

ORIGINAL: RapierFugue

d) I find you fucking hi-larious, but your option selection sucks rancid badger puke from dead goat's arses ;)



RF, I know you to be a man who will not be beaten to a fond hair-ruffling by a person of inferior intelligence, wisdom and verbiage. Please kindly explain your comment more fully!


Tell me which bit you didn't understand and I'll try to help you :)
if its the part about sucking the rancid puke...don't answer him...ok?


_____________________________

PICKED UPON
TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:24:45 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RapierFugue
Tell me which bit you didn't understand and I'll try to help you :)


I didn't understand the bit where you chickened out of giving a proper answer because you're a big girl's blouse and a screaming woofter, RF. I hope that helps . . . .

_____________________________

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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:26:59 PM   
RapierFugue


Posts: 4740
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: London, England
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer


quote:

ORIGINAL: RapierFugue
Tell me which bit you didn't understand and I'll try to help you :)


I didn't understand the bit where you chickened out of giving a proper answer because you're a big girl's blouse and a screaming woofter, RF. I hope that helps . . . .

Pffft.

Yeah, that's right, I went there. Pffft :)

I was every bit as serious as your question was. More so, in fact.

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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:28:54 PM   
Aylee


Posts: 24103
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
I didn't understand the bit where you chickened out of giving a proper answer because you're a big girl's blouse and a screaming woofter, RF. I hope that helps . . . .


Speak American English please so that I can understand this phrase. 

_____________________________

Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam

I don’t always wgah’nagl fhtagn. But when I do, I ph’nglui mglw’nafh R’lyeh.

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RE: D/s is about unfairness - 1/29/2011 6:31:04 PM   
RapierFugue


Posts: 4740
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aylee

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
I didn't understand the bit where you chickened out of giving a proper answer because you're a big girl's blouse and a screaming woofter, RF. I hope that helps . . . .


Speak American English please so that I can understand this phrase. 


<narrows eyes>

You're not helping. I just want you to know that :)

(in reply to Aylee)
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