D/s is about unfairness

D/s is about unfairness (Full Version)

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[Poll]

Right as always. You're brilliance makes me so hot, Peon.

29% (7)

Total wank as usual, Peon. When was the last time you went out?

45% (11)

That's not the key thing, but sort of. Let me explain.

25% (6)

Total Votes : 24

(last vote on : 1/30/2011 6:43:45 PM)
(Poll will run till: -- )

Message

PeonForHer -> D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 4:27:39 PM)
Just found myself ruminating about this. For me, as a hetero sub male, the crucial thing is that a D/s relationship is unfair. It is wrong that some woman has superiority over me, gets to give me orders, control me, punish me for infractions . . . and so on. And this is why I like it. This is what gives me the buzz. I love all the contradictions that it implies, no matter how much they bust logic apart. But what say everyone else? Give your innermost thoughts and coherently argued opinion. I shall grade your post accordingly and the writer of the best response shall have his or her hair ruffled fondly.

gungadin09 -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 5:34:47 PM)
Okay, i'm not even gonna try for the best argument. But i would have used the words "authority" and "subordination" to describe D/s, instead. To me, the fact that we're not all created equal isn't the same as "unfairness". i don't respect people who i think are unfair, and for me respect is a prerequisite for submission. i will submit to the person who is better than i am (at whatever thing), that by being associated with them, i become a better person myself. i give respect because it is earned, and i get something back in return. i'd say that's absolutely fair. pam

kalikshama -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 5:43:39 PM)
I often contemplate the unfairness of my playmate having to do all the work while I just lie there, bound and helpless, quivering in ecstasy or shrieking in terror.

RapierFugue -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 5:46:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer Just found myself ruminating about this. For me, as a hetero sub male, the crucial thing is that a D/s relationship is unfair. It is wrong that some woman has superiority over me, gets to give me orders, control me, punish me for infractions . . . and so on. And this is why I like it. This is what gives me the buzz. I love all the contradictions that it implies, no matter how much they bust logic apart. But what say everyone else? Give your innermost thoughts and coherently argued opinion. I shall grade your post accordingly and the writer of the best response shall have his or her hair ruffled fondly. You're missing an option: d) I find you fucking hi-larious, but your option selection sucks rancid badger puke from dead goat's arses ;)

littlewonder -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 5:48:44 PM)
It's unfair in our relationship but I don't get off on that, it's not what revves me. It is just how it is because he gets what he wants and I don't always get what I want.

TreasureKY -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 5:59:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer For me, as a hetero sub male, the crucial thing is that a D/s relationship is unfair. It is wrong that some woman has superiority over me, gets to give me orders, control me, punish me for infractions . . . and so on. And this is why I like it. This is what gives me the buzz. I love all the contradictions that it implies, no matter how much they bust logic apart. That's cool. For me, it isn't about fairness in our relationship. (Heck, life isn't fair.) We have a partnership and we are equals. It's just that someone needs to be the leader of our relationship and have the responsibility of making final decisions... and we prefer that he be that leader and decision-maker. [;)]

sirsholly -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:02:52 PM)
our D/s relationship is what we both want. How is that unfair? [sm=dunno.gif]

Tantriqu -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:03:27 PM)
I was brought up 'traditionally', i.e., all females acquiesce to all males. My parents are in a morganic marriage, where my mum is considerably smarter than my dad; however, she hides it and manipulates him into thinking he makes all the decisions. It disgusted me from the moment I recognised it, and I swore to never act that way, to never live a lie or to lie so much to others. Fortunately, with my first 'real' boyfriend, at least we had an egalitarian relationship where I didn't have to hide my brains, and we had a lot of 'I do that to you, then you do that to me' sex. But then I discovered with him it's very arousing for me to be sexually dominant and here's the important bit, good men are aroused, sexually and emotionally, by being submissive and by serving me. AMAZING!! I Love Fucking Good Sub Men in their Fabulously Receptive Asses! And They Do, Too! ILFSFRA! ATDT! I'm no sadist, and I'm not interested in masochists. I couldn't enjoy doing what I do and being who I am without having someone who at least equally enjoys what I do to him. It's very restful to us both that it's all above-board and clearly communicated. Oh, and fabulous multiple orgasms all 'round. Nifty. Apply rufflage here: [sm=hearts.gif]: Edited to add: A, B and C

sirsholly -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:07:26 PM)
quote: my mum is considerably smarter than my dad; however, she hides it and manipulates him into thinking he makes all the decisions. It disgusted me from the moment I recognised it, and I swore to never act that way, to never live a lie or to lie so much to others. i am not slamming your parents, Tanriqu, but i would see this type of a relationship as far more unfair than a consensual D/s relationship

Tantriqu -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:08:48 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sirsholly quote: my mum is considerably smarter than my dad; however, she hides it and manipulates him into thinking he makes all the decisions. It disgusted me from the moment I recognised it, and I swore to never act that way, to never live a lie or to lie so much to others. i am not slamming your parents, Tanriqu, but i would see this type of a relationship as far more unfair than a consensual D/s relationship That's what I meant.

PeonForHer -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:09:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RapierFugue d) I find you fucking hi-larious, but your option selection sucks rancid badger puke from dead goat's arses ;) RF, I know you to be a man who will not be beaten to a fond hair-ruffling by a person of inferior intelligence, wisdom and verbiage. Please kindly explain your comment more fully!

PeonForHer -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:12:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sirsholly our D/s relationship is what we both want. How is that unfair? [sm=dunno.gif] I don't know! You tell me! But if I were in the right type of unfair relationship, I'd be a pretty damned happy bunny, that's all I can say.

sirsholly -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:16:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer quote: ORIGINAL: sirsholly our D/s relationship is what we both want. How is that unfair? [sm=dunno.gif] I don't know! You tell me! But if I were in the right type of unfair relationship, I'd be a pretty damned happy bunny, that's all I can say. The "right type of unfair relationship" is a bit of an oxymoron, in my opinion. If it is a "right" relationship then you and your partner are both happy and satisfied, so unfairness should not be an issue.

Masticator -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:18:28 PM)
I wouldn't say it is about the unfairness for the sake of unfairness, but rather the unfairness is the result of the circumstances that we've both mutually and happily agreed to. And in that regard it is perfectly fair. The submissive gets certain pleasure or fulfillment out of giving in or submitting to the dominant and as I've heard them tell it..... the dominant's joy in this is a main catalyst of the joy the submissive achieves. The dominant gets pleasure or fulfillment out of that submission but also bears a significant level of responsibility for their partner's wellbeing. One of the ways that the stress of responsibility is soothed is by knowing that your submissive, out of devotion, respect and trust, is willing to endure unpleasantness. Is it fair that one partner gets what they want the majority of the time and the other partner makes some sacrifices? Of course not. Is it fair that one partner carries the weight of responsibility the majority of the time and the partner follows along? Of course not. Do Doms have to deal with things they'd rather not? Of course. Do subs have to deal with things they'd rather not? Of course. In my opinion the unfairness is part of the balance. And as a female dominant the balance is tilted to my benefit, I believe. And I think we're all supposed to like it like that, right? Incidentally I've heard quite a few (dare I suggest 'bad'?) subs complain that things aren't fair and I find it particularly interesting (yes and sexy) that you thrive on the unfairness of it all.

RapierFugue -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:22:33 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer quote: ORIGINAL: RapierFugue d) I find you fucking hi-larious, but your option selection sucks rancid badger puke from dead goat's arses ;) RF, I know you to be a man who will not be beaten to a fond hair-ruffling by a person of inferior intelligence, wisdom and verbiage. Please kindly explain your comment more fully! Tell me which bit you didn't understand and I'll try to help you :)

sirsholly -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:24:23 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RapierFugue quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer quote: ORIGINAL: RapierFugue d) I find you fucking hi-larious, but your option selection sucks rancid badger puke from dead goat's arses ;) RF, I know you to be a man who will not be beaten to a fond hair-ruffling by a person of inferior intelligence, wisdom and verbiage. Please kindly explain your comment more fully! Tell me which bit you didn't understand and I'll try to help you :) if its the part about sucking the rancid puke...don't answer him...ok?

PeonForHer -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:24:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RapierFugue Tell me which bit you didn't understand and I'll try to help you :) I didn't understand the bit where you chickened out of giving a proper answer because you're a big girl's blouse and a screaming woofter, RF. I hope that helps . . . .

RapierFugue -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:26:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer quote: ORIGINAL: RapierFugue Tell me which bit you didn't understand and I'll try to help you :) I didn't understand the bit where you chickened out of giving a proper answer because you're a big girl's blouse and a screaming woofter, RF. I hope that helps . . . . Pffft. Yeah, that's right, I went there. Pffft :) I was every bit as serious as your question was. More so, in fact.

Aylee -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:28:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer I didn't understand the bit where you chickened out of giving a proper answer because you're a big girl's blouse and a screaming woofter, RF. I hope that helps . . . . Speak American English please so that I can understand this phrase.

RapierFugue -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 6:31:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Aylee quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer I didn't understand the bit where you chickened out of giving a proper answer because you're a big girl's blouse and a screaming woofter, RF. I hope that helps . . . . Speak American English please so that I can understand this phrase. <narrows eyes> You're not helping. I just want you to know that :)

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