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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/5/2011 11:54:07 PM   
hngnyc


Posts: 24
Joined: 3/24/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: VideoAdminAlpha

...



Thank you for your reply. It is credible.

I will say that Mod 21's comment, "He is intimately aware, I'm sure." was a cheap shot by an authority figure and dimishes the moderators if they tolerate it.

I believe I have answered your question in one of my few previous posts.



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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/5/2011 11:56:12 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		*sends smooches and hugs to VAA*

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/5/2011 11:57:13 PM   
VideoAdminAlpha


Posts: 3876
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline 		As I was being honest, I have not read the thread, my attention was called to it because it appeared that possibly my comments would bring enlightenment from the site. I will go read them now .

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You can't please all the people all of the time.Unfortunately there are times you cannot please any of them :( You can only do your best, and hope they realize that.

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/5/2011 11:57:58 PM   
VideoAdminAlpha


Posts: 3876
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline 		Thank you, that is always truly appreciated!!!

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You can't please all the people all of the time.Unfortunately there are times you cannot please any of them :( You can only do your best, and hope they realize that.

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/6/2011 4:06:14 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenStWest

Here is how I spot fake lifestyle Dommes who are in actuality looking for customers.  Maybe it will help others, feel free to add to the list LOL
  1. They are under 25. For the most part they see this as a better option to wearing a funny hat and asking if you want fries to go with that.
  2. They say they are Pro and Lifestyle. What they really me is they are here for the Pro part. Anyone who really is both will have two profiles aimed at each type.
  3. Their email or IM id is listed in their profile. Pure lunacy for any Domme to resort to this as there are only 100 male subs per Domme.
  4. They contact you first. I know, I know, it may just be the real thing, but that is the kinda thinking they prey on. (Note, this is not always true, more so then the rest).
  5. They are ultra attractive. The photo is fake as if they were that gorgeous then why are they advertising?
  6. Their messages arrive quicker then they can be humanly typed.... I mean cut and pasted.
  7. They want to collar you on the first day.
  8. They treat you like a piece of shit, before they get to know you :)



I think that you are lumping several different types together.

There are legitimate pro Dommes who may in fact hide that fact.  Since I'm not looking for a Domme, pro or otherwise, I haven't directly experienced that.

There are also scammers who pretenmd to be beautiful young women who then reveal that they are stranded in some other country or else willing to meet you if you supply airfare.  One telltale giveaway is that they always equate D/s with sheer kinky sex.  I used to think this was stupidity on their part until I realized that they are targeting men who themselves do not know the difference.

There are also fake Dommes whose entire mission is to get you to sign up on some website.

They all use different methods.

quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenStWest

Miss Asylum, beats working at Mcdonalds huh?


MissA has worked as a consultant and as a professional model.  She's lived overseas.  I believe that she's completed her degree.  And she's smart as hell.  I'm not sure why you felt compelled to tell her she should be working in a McDonalds.  That comment won't win you many friends nor help you in your goal, which should be to get yourself a lifestyle Domme.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/6/2011 5:30:00 AM   
MissAsylum


Posts: 1863
Joined: 1/9/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenStWest

Miss Asylum, beats working at Mcdonalds huh?


I actually have worked at McDonald's before...as a manager...when I was 16. I didn't hate my job, and I didn't mind it either.

However, I think you need to get from under the idea that if a woman was not professionally involved in the BDSM world, she would be stuck at a job where she would be greeting people with, "May I take your order?" As Steven said above, I have a degree (Master's in Art, Bachelor's in English), I model, I've worked as a consultant, and to add to the list, I am a professional makeup artist. Many, if not all Professionals are extremely smart and would do just fine on their own.

I'm not bragging, but I've worked damn hard to get where I'm at. Being a professional Domme only supplements my income. I don't depend on it for anything.

So I don't know what you may have heard, but this is not easy way to make money. I bet you haven't a clue what it costs to run on rent out a play space, how much equipment costs, how much going to seminars and taking classes cost. If you had even the faintest idea, you wouldn't be making statements like you have.

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/6/2011 10:14:22 PM   
QueenStWest


Posts: 25
Joined: 2/27/2008
Status: offline 		To VAA, you say you have not read the thread, so why are you commenting about it.  Would it not be wise to take five minutes to read what all the fuss is about, then comment?  People on here have accused me of being that guy, and I am not.  If anyone has cause to dispute my claim, and proof then come forward, otherwise take your medicine and shut the fuck up.

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/6/2011 10:18:42 PM   
QueenStWest


Posts: 25
Joined: 2/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:


I think that you are lumping several different types together.
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:



You are right, I am lumping in several things under the umbrella of "what to watch out for" if you are a sub looking for a lifestyle companion, on this site.

I forgot to add this:  anyone who says they do not have a pic.  In 2011 when every phone and computer can take a snapshot, that is pure BS.  It would be acceptable to hear "I have a pic but do not care to share it with you" but anyone who says they don't have one is 100% not worth investing time in

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/6/2011 10:39:41 PM   
QueenStWest


Posts: 25
Joined: 2/27/2008
Status: offline 		Miss Asylum, you say that you are a pro and lifestyle domme, but are in a relationship with a non sub.  So what is your lifestyle involvement actually, you give freebies to clients you like?  

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/7/2011 7:03:58 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Not directed at Me (again) but for conversation's sake, I'll throw in two more cents.

I'll gladly volunteer the fact that I am married to a non sub man.  That has absolutely nothing to do with My lifestyle involvement.  I'm Dominant to My submissive, not to My husband.  In the last six months, I organized a lifestyle event for one munch group, was a presenter at another, and been elected to the board as Dungeon Mistress at a third.  At two of those three groups, I'm also the charter captain of a charity drive.  As I've mentioned here and on other threads, I do play casually, and I don't make money off of anyone.  Let Me guess?  Since My husband isn't a sub, I'm not a *real* lifestyle Domme.

Being that this is My position, it's perfectly reasonable for Me to understand that others might have different styled relationships with different people.  Maybe it's very much the case with Miss A there.  A relationship that doesn't have a D/s component, some folks that she plays with for fun, and some folks that she plays with for business.  Seems rather reasonable, in My opinion.


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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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(in reply to QueenStWest)
Profile   Post #: 130
RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/7/2011 7:12:21 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		Thanks for being a first person accounting of what I was trying to articulate, LadyP (without success OR  making a posting.. I hate when I cant say what I mean and not have it come out lame.. ).
*hugs and regards to you all*

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/7/2011 10:55:09 AM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		Just an aside here but dang.. that QSW can really toss a pout!

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/7/2011 11:08:14 AM   
tiggerspoohbear


Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline 		And tossing a pout at VAA is not the smoothest move the ex-lax could make either.  QSW, you have no idea that the hours VAA, the other VAs and the Mods put into this site.  All at their own cost since it's volunteer work.  And not an easy one to do when douchecanoes make comments like you did.  I'm sure they're somehow used to it, but it's uncalled for and shows your general crassness and that you have no class.

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/7/2011 12:20:39 PM   
MissAsylum


Posts: 1863
Joined: 1/9/2009
Status: offline 		Thank you LP. You have worded this so much better than I could have at the moment.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact



Being that this is My position, it's perfectly reasonable for Me to understand that others might have different styled relationships with different people.  Maybe it's very much the case with Miss A there.  A relationship that doesn't have a D/s component, some folks that she plays with for fun, and some folks that she plays with for business.  Seems rather reasonable, in My opinion.




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I hate when I'm wearing my apple bottom jeans, but i can't find my boots with the fur.

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/7/2011 12:25:43 PM   
MissAsylum


Posts: 1863
Joined: 1/9/2009
Status: offline 		So I'm curious- since when is the level of my "involement" any concern of yours? And to what effect would it prove to you? Seriously, if I were you, I'd keep my one-sided "thoughts" abouts certain relationships and people to myself until i was more open-minded and educated on the subject matter.

And something else that I'm curious about: what, pray tell, does my realationship have to do with the fact that you think I'm uneducated and would only be suited for cooking French fries for a living?
quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenStWest

Miss Asylum, you say that you are a pro and lifestyle domme, but are in a relationship with a non sub.  So what is your lifestyle involvement actually, you give freebies to clients you like?  



< Message edited by MissAsylum -- 2/7/2011 12:31:01 PM >

_____________________________

I hate when I'm wearing my apple bottom jeans, but i can't find my boots with the fur.

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Profile   Post #: 135
RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/7/2011 7:32:16 PM   
QueenStWest


Posts: 25
Joined: 2/27/2008
Status: offline 		My contention is that most under 25's are not lifestyle per say, but looking for an income, supplemental if it be.  Your profile makes it clear that you are looking for clients, but still feel the need to tell everyone that you are lifestyle.  Ok, but if your relationship is vanilla, then where does the lifestyle come in? As for your contention that you are "penalized for being attractive"  firstly, I am glad that you find yourself attractive, and secondly do you also complain that (god forbid) some of your clients come to you based on your looks?  

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/8/2011 12:57:18 AM   
LadyNTrainer


Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NocturnalStalker
I want 15%, and I also want three popsicles per day all of the grape flavour. If my demands are not met then I guess I'm out of luck, now aren't I?


Agreed.  If you think you can take fifteen inches, that is.  Also you did not specify which orifice the popsicles will go into, so we will of course be making that selection for you. 


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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/8/2011 3:21:52 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		On an English BDSM site I use there is a tick box for pro Domme/Dom/sub. Some people choose not to use it but if they get caught advertising and don't have a tick in that box they get reprimanded. In many ways its worked out well because there is now a 'pro' forum on that site and it also lets people know at the glance of an eye who they are dealing with.
There are problems however. Many pros use the site but not as a professional vessel. They are just there to catch up with people or perhaps find themselves a non paying partner. They still get dozens of emails and those emails are normally directed to their pro sites because even the best of them (who are not looking) won't kick a possible gift horse in the mouth.

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RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/8/2011 5:50:32 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenStWest

Miss Asylum, you say that you are a pro and lifestyle domme, but are in a relationship with a non sub.  So what is your lifestyle involvement actually, you give freebies to clients you like?  


Wow.  You are equating a relationship with play sessions.  You DO understand the difference, right?

quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenStWest

You are right, I am lumping in several things under the umbrella of "what to watch out for" if you are a sub looking for a lifestyle companion, on this site.



So you want to Dom the entire site and have it changed to suit your specific desires?

The above two quotes show a lot about you.  You want to be played with in sessions, and not have to submit outside of them.  The lifestyle Dommes generally want to have someone who will serve them outside the bedroom - cooking, cleaning, running errands, etc.

I get the feeling that you're looking for a woman who will be vanilla except in the bedroom, where she will Top you.  That is NOT what a lifestyle Domme is.  Basically, you're looking for a woman who will Top you like a pro Domme, but for free.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to QueenStWest)
Profile   Post #: 139
RE: Why have pro and lifestyle mixed together? - 2/8/2011 7:46:20 AM   
MissAsylum


Posts: 1863
Joined: 1/9/2009
Status: offline 		my relationship is not vanilla, never said that it was.My partner is not my submissive or slave,plan and simple. I am lifestyle because I go to munches (something i suggest that you do) and i have people i have met, that i play with for fun. I don't troll them for clients. And i "feel the need" to tell people about my relationship is because I am ASKED about it, just as you're doing now. And because you made a statement about pros who are claiming to be lifestyle being 25 and attractive, you made it sound like anybody who fits in those catagories CANNOT be lifestyle. And i have no problem with clients coming to me because i am attractive. They come back for my skills.

_____________________________

I hate when I'm wearing my apple bottom jeans, but i can't find my boots with the fur.

(in reply to QueenStWest)
Profile   Post #: 140
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