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What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 12:53:32 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		Reading about going out to dinner in a nice restaurant, wearing a collar and "slut" clothes (not my word), the person on the left side of the slash seemed to be of the idea that if people were staring at the couple, it would be due to the collar.

My thought was if people were staring, it would be due to the "slut" clothes. 

What would be your thoughts if you saw something like that?  I think I can predict for some, it would be "nice shoes". LOL.

Years ago when I was taking clients out to dinner on an expense account, I went to some really upscale restaurants.  I do remember one time a maitre d' trying to discreetly refuse service to a gentleman due to his companion.  It wasn't discreet because the young lady's voice carried when she inquired as to why they wouldn't be dining that evening.  It was completely a "Pretty Woman" moment.

So, back to the question... do you dress for the occasion and location, or do you wear whatever you want, wherever you go, and to hell with everyone else?  If you do dress for the occasion and location, what are your thoughts when you see someone who clearly does not?

Cali


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AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll
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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 1:01:15 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		I dress for the occcasion. I'm all about respecting the home in which you are and following their "rules". If you don't like them then don't go there. If I'm at a 4 star restaurant then I wear a nice dress, not too short, not too low cut, very respectable. If I'm at a nightclub then I'll wear something a little skimpier and showing off more skin.

When I see people who don't follow the "rules of the house" I automatically think they are uncouth and have no decorum. I don't really understand people who just do whatever the hell they feel like. To me it means they have no respect for anyone at all and they're completely selfish....not people I usually have much to do with.

When I see a woman wearing a collar and "slut" clothing, it's the clothing that causes me to stare, not the collar. There are collars that are very low key and and then there are collars that scream but it's her clothing that's going to make me think she might be someone he had to pay to bring her along.

(in reply to CalifChick)
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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 1:04:31 PM   
JstAnotherSub


Posts: 6174
Status: offline 		I think that people who dress "sluttish" at inappropriate times are desperate for attention, good or bad. I know some associate it with extreme confidence, but to me it says the exact opposite.



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yep

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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 1:11:37 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick.
So, back to the question... do you dress for the occasion and location, or do you wear whatever you want, wherever you go, and to hell with everyone else? 

Cali



It is expected that I wear that which is acceptable to the establishment I am about to go to, because they are the hosts, even if they are taking money. If I am to dress a certain way, then Master would not take me to somewhere that didn't have the dress code he wanted.

quote:

If you do dress for the occasion and location, what are your thoughts when you see someone who clearly does not?


I don't care how other people dress and it's none of my business. The only time it matters is if it's under Masters roof, and then he deals with that.

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RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to CalifChick)
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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 1:16:28 PM   
discreethusband


Posts: 52
Joined: 3/3/2009
Status: offline 		When in Rome. I usually try to dress appropriate for where I am at. I take issue to people wearing their pajamas out to go shopping at 3:30 in the afternoon. That novelty wore off in college, or at least should have. I tend to agree with the poster above, that people that wear what ever they want, when ever they want, with no care or consideration usually have no respect for others. Or at least, have no consideration for others.

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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 1:18:09 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		While I believe people should do what they wish to do, I also believe that we need to use reason and some sort of social accountability with some reason there as well. I love different types of clothing and accessories and tend to wear what I wish to, but there was a time when I could not. I would spice up what was acceptable for the occasion with my own flavor, but always had to keep in mind those first impressions, my reputation and what I had to do beyond personal expression.

You can call attention to yourself in many ways, but if you are a rebel and feel that you need to prove you are a free spirit and do what you will, whenever, wherever; you will in my opinion be an agitator in some form, somewhere. I don't believe we must conform at all times, but if you are involved in a certain activity, it is a 'nice person thing' to respect others there.

I wore things in a professional setting that would never get noticed because of the whole picture. You draw the eye or attention with whatever you are wearing whether that be a jacket, skirt, jewelry or make up. Whichever is the more prominent, will get the attention. So I wouldn't be looking at a collar when there was someone wearing slutty clothing. I wouldn't really care for myself, but if it caused a scene or drew attention from what we all were there trying to do, I would feel that was attention seeking and lacking in social skills. I wouldn't respect that aspect of it.


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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 2:11:04 PM   
purepleasure


Posts: 6941
Joined: 4/9/2004
From: Lehigh Valley, PA
Status: offline 		Remember the old saying "Clothes make the man (or woman)"? This is one of those moments. Accessories are very versatile and might make a statement on their own, but the first impression is almost always from garments.

For instance, if the same woman in question were in dirty clothes in need of repair, would you be looking at the collar or her clothes?

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Your stupidity does not impress me.

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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 2:49:31 PM   
MercTech


Posts: 3706
Joined: 7/4/2006
Status: offline 		Sometimes it can be fun... i.e. Kilt and leather buffcoat with a tavern wench on the arm going into a five star resturant.
Walking into an IT conference in full biker leathers.

Stefan

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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 3:50:17 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MercTech

Sometimes it can be fun... i.e. Kilt and leather buffcoat with a tavern wench on the arm going into a five star resturant.
Walking into an IT conference in full biker leathers.

Stefan


May I ask what is fun about it? What do you get from it? Is it an attention thing? Just curious.

(in reply to MercTech)
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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 3:53:51 PM   
tiggerspoohbear


Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline 		I wear clothing appropriate to the occasion.  I would not have a Dom "instruct" me to wear slutty clothes to a restaurant, or to go out in public (ie. mall etc.).  I'm self-conscious as it is and over 45, I will not make a fool of myself just because someone wants me to do so. 

If we were at home by ourselves, or with a group of like-minded friends, then that's a whole nuther ball of wax.  A collar can be tasteful, any piece of jewelry can.  I also don't want to make people around me feel uncomfortable with my choice of clothing.  My kink is NOT theirs, why expose them to it?  I'm past the age where I want to rebel in public and make an ass of myself. 


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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 4:19:05 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		I tend to wear whatever is on the top of the clean clothes pile. I don't have much in the way of clothing, a few pairs of jeans and a dozen or so button-down shirts, and a few t-shirts (I'm a bit too rotund to wear t-shirts often). So I never dress up, nor do I deliberately dress down...I just dress and to be honest since fashion and what I wear means so very little to me I really don't care what other people wear, that too is of no consequence to me.


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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 4:43:01 PM   
Kaliko


Posts: 3381
Joined: 9/25/2010
Status: offline 		I dress appropriate to the location and occasion. I am not offended when other people dress to the extreme - I might be more interested than anything else.


(in reply to Arpig)
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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 4:48:37 PM   
gungadin09


Posts: 3232
Joined: 3/19/2010
Status: offline 		i almost never eat out, but when i do i dress appropriately. If i saw someone who *didn't* i would notice it, but it wouldn't bug me much. Not like it would bug me for them to come in with their screaming baby, or to get drunk and talk and laugh so loud that the whole restaurant could hear.

If someone came in wearing hoochie clothes and a collar, i would probably notice the hoochie clothes.

pam

< Message edited by gungadin09 -- 2/20/2011 4:49:27 PM >

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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 5:15:38 PM   
LadyRedRose


Posts: 104
Joined: 1/28/2011
Status: offline 		there's a time and a place for everything, that does not mean it's anytime and any place. someone might like to behave in that manner but i prefer a bit more restraint. i dress for the occasion.

(in reply to gungadin09)
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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 5:43:58 PM   
Termyn8or


Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline 		Glad I stopped by.

Cali, if your ass is in it I will be looking whether it is the finest linen or a burlap sack.

A collar ? I would be pleased to step on your leash. They are watching ? Let's just tease them a bit more :-)

T^T

(in reply to CalifChick)
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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 5:45:12 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

So, back to the question... do you dress for the occasion and location, or do you wear whatever you want, wherever you go, and to hell with everyone else?


I usually dress for the occasion which is why I don't wear a football jersery to the opera or an evening gown to a football game.

quote:

If you do dress for the occasion and location, what are your thoughts when you see someone who clearly does not?


As long as they don't stink, I'm cool with it. I wore a prisoner outfit (orange to boot!) to my own wedding but I smelled good while I was wearing it.

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"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to CalifChick)
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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 5:45:19 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Wearing a collar is not always a sign of BDSM or a power exchange relationship. Sometimes it is simply a fashion statement. I see it all the time.....usually with multiple piercings, bad makeup and black clothes.

If I go to a nice restaurant, that I have taken the time to dress appropriately for, and see some one dressed inappropriately......I think "How tacky/trashy/awkward/sad/whatever comes to mind." given the nature of whatever they are wearing.

It doesn't really matter to me one way or another. They pay the price for the choices they make, not I.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 6:18:08 PM   
Aylee


Posts: 24103
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline 		Pretty much what LaT said.

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RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 6:20:56 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble


quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

So, back to the question... do you dress for the occasion and location, or do you wear whatever you want, wherever you go, and to hell with everyone else?


I usually dress for the occasion which is why I don't wear a football jersery to the opera or an evening gown to a football game.

quote:

If you do dress for the occasion and location, what are your thoughts when you see someone who clearly does not?


As long as they don't stink, I'm cool with it. I wore a prisoner outfit (orange to boot!) to my own wedding but I smelled good while I was wearing it.


I would seriously love to see the wedding photos!!!

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: What do you think when you see... - 2/20/2011 6:41:07 PM   
kallisto


Posts: 1185
Status: offline 		I dress for the occasion and location. Slutty clothes at an upscale function/location would draw my attention long before a collar would. However, to each their own. Some feel as though they need their clothes to make a statement about themselves. Others simply may not have been "taught" or advised on what would be considered appropriate.

(in reply to LaTigresse)
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