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Sexuality - 5/4/2006 1:37:30 PM   
brokenmaleslave


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I am wondering if the sexuality in profiles should be divided into 2 sections. Vanilla, and BDSM. I ask this because, as a submissive male, i have had occaison to submit to men, and have accepted the experience. However in the vanilla way that sexual orientation is defined, i am straight and have never had leanings toward sexual experiences with men. Does anyone else have a viewpoint on this?
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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 1:40:08 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
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ummmmmmm..........yes, and I can assert with great confidence that there is no coincidence in it with your own.

Sincerely,
Ron
edit:  but this is good for at least six pages out here.

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Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 1:41:52 PM   
artglfr


Posts: 235
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Why make it more complicated. I think in BDSM most of us will "Play" with the same sex...does NOT mean We  are having sex with them just that sometimes one realizes that a sub hasn't had a chance to play and  why not spank that ass and make them feel like they are part of the group.

I have no problem spanking and playing with a male at a play party but i don't see myself having one for my own.

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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 1:46:16 PM   
Proprietrix


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It seems to me if a male sexually submits to men, and has vanilla sex with women, wouldn't that just be bisexual. I have trouble with the concept of deliniating one's sexuality as "I'm gay under these circumstances, but straight under other circumstances." Why not just accept bisexuality?

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IMO, IMHO, YMMV, AFAIK, to me, I see it as, from my perspective, it's been my experience, I only speak for myself, (and all other disclaimers here).

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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 1:51:50 PM   
agirl


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quote:

It seems to me if a male sexually submits to men, and has vanilla sex with women, wouldn't that just be bisexual. I have trouble with the concept of deliniating one's sexuality as "I'm gay under these circumstances, but straight under other circumstances." Why not just accept bisexuality?
quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix

..because someone can have *sex* with the opposite gender and not be bisexual or gay.........taking part in sexual acts doesn't define your sexuality....either in vanilla or bdsm.

agirl



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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 1:58:19 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


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I would just put it in the profile "Willing to submit to someone based on their dominance, not their sexual preference/gender/orientation, but not desiring to be sexual with anyone other than women."

There's simply too many variations of sub/sex combos out there to be feasible to make a list of them all.  But you can state it just fine specifically in your profile.

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"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 1:59:24 PM   
brokenmaleslave


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix

It seems to me if a male sexually submits to men, and has vanilla sex with women, wouldn't that just be bisexual. I have trouble with the concept of deliniating one's sexuality as "I'm gay under these circumstances, but straight under other circumstances." Why not just accept bisexuality?


Because for me BDSM is not sexual, it is a way of life. i know and i accept i am submissive, even close to slave, but it is not limited by sexual appeal more, nature.

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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 2:25:22 PM   
Proprietrix


Posts: 756
Joined: 7/15/2005
From: Ohio/West Virginia
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quote:

ORIGINAL: brokenmaleslave
quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix
It seems to me if a male sexually submits to men, and has vanilla sex with women, wouldn't that just be bisexual. I have trouble with the concept of deliniating one's sexuality as "I'm gay under these circumstances, but straight under other circumstances." Why not just accept bisexuality?

Because for me BDSM is not sexual, it is a way of life. i know and i accept i am submissive, even close to slave, but it is not limited by sexual appeal more, nature.


I guess I was under the impression that you were submitting to men in a sexual manner.

Maybe it's all in one's interpretation. I don't consider the typical "scene" sexual. (as in, tie someone to the cross, beat them with some toys, kind of scene.) Nor do I consider cleaning someone's house and running their errands sexual. However, I do consider kinky sex, strap-on usage, anal play, etc... sexual.

If you're not submitting to them sexually, I guess I don't understand why sexuality would be in question in the first place.

If you *are* submitting to them sexually, I'd probably stand by my original statement of accepting bisexuality. I don't know many (if any) men who identify themselves as straight, but would willingly allow another man to play with their jewels or go down on another man.

Sorry if I misunderstood the original question.

_____________________________

IMO, IMHO, YMMV, AFAIK, to me, I see it as, from my perspective, it's been my experience, I only speak for myself, (and all other disclaimers here).

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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 2:40:59 PM   
MistressWolfen


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quote:

ORIGINAL: brokenmaleslave

I am wondering if the sexuality in profiles should be divided into 2 sections. Does anyone else have a viewpoint on this?


I do indeed; I want a third section added just for me...omnisexual...*toddles off to start making the placards for picketing with*

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Quoth the raven

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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 5:01:00 PM   
WyrdRich


Posts: 1733
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         Just me and my opinion but I simply can't get my mind around BDSM without some kind of sexual component involved.

        But then I don't understand alcohol-free beer either.

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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 5:07:51 PM   
MistressWolfen


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quote:

ORIGINAL: WyrdRich

       But then I don't understand alcohol-free beer either.


alcohol-free beer!!! that is just sick and twisted.....*goes to lay down and ponder true perversion*

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Quoth the raven

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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 5:13:30 PM   
littlemissub


Posts: 118
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I agree with artglfr.  I consider myself straight but when it comes to BDSM play, I have no problems playing with a female.  But I would say My inclination is still towards men.  I think that jst comes from the open-mindedness of the lifestyle.  BDSMers tend to be a little more open and in tune with themselves than the vanilla population.  I figure though that there is no reason to change it here.  That would just complicate it more.  It is that whole thing that society makes you feel you should fit into a label.  Be happy with who you are and don't worry about it.

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~littlemissy~

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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 5:17:48 PM   
littlemissub


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exactly agirl.  It has more to do with fulfillment of the moment rather than a actual sexual preference.  People need to move past these labels!

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~littlemissy~

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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 6:19:21 PM   
CERCKL


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Joined: 3/4/2006
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quote:

exactly agirl.  It has more to do with fulfillment of the moment rather than a actual sexual preference.  People need to move past these labels!



...but, but, I just bought this new Brother labelmaker, I mean laminated and everything and you want to move past labels???

Dammit.

C

BTW Labels can both be limiting as well as defining...it should provide certain markers which we can expand from...unfortunately most use it as shorthand and just go with stereotypes...

My label "asshole"

< Message edited by CERCKL -- 5/4/2006 6:48:17 PM >


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AND I AM TOO AN ASSHOLE, I HAVE REFERENCES!!!

"Please, please, please believe me, I really am an asshole. All that Enlightenment and Higher Learning shit was all a ruse."

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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 6:38:14 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CERCKL

quote:

exactly agirl.  It has more to do with fulfillment of the moment rather than a actual sexual preference.  People need to move past these labels!



...but, but, I just bought this ne Brother labelmaker, I mean laminated and everything and you want to move past labels???

Dammit.

C

BTW Labels can both be limiting as well as defining...it should provide certain markers which we can expand from...unfortunately most use it as shorthand and just go with stereotypes...

My label "asshole"

Dear sweet asshole ...put brother away and get tattooist to place your label upon your person, more permanent less sticky!..*dang I hope he doesnt ask where he should place that tattoo)...hummm...Tempting

(in reply to CERCKL)
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RE: Sexuality - 5/4/2006 6:45:42 PM   
littlemissub


Posts: 118
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I know it is tramautizing when you buy a new labelmaker and run out of things to label.  No worries though, something new will pop up sooner or later.  Well, Mr. "asshole" it is a pleasure to meet you.  I agree.  Labels can be a good guide.  When I denounce them is when they support misleading stereotypes of a community or lifestyle.

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~littlemissy~

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RE: Sexuality - 5/5/2006 12:34:16 AM   
Wickad


Posts: 428
Joined: 3/12/2005
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brokenmaleslave

I get what you're saying - I think - lol.  ... and when can you move to Calgary  - lol.

I would love a boy who was willing to service a man but didn't want to - that would be fantastic!!!  Nothing like watching the hesitation and fear being overcome by the need to do my bidding - he he he!!!

Wickad

(in reply to littlemissub)
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RE: Sexuality - 5/5/2006 12:39:26 AM   
Kidless


Posts: 104
Joined: 5/4/2006
Status: offline
Oh,I get it.

Sport practice-and sport-makes perfect sense.

I used to beat boys as PRACTICE to beat girls.

I just didn't screw them too.

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RE: Sexuality - 5/5/2006 2:09:41 AM   
Wulfchyld


Posts: 2618
Joined: 12/7/2005
Status: offline
You could probably clear it up for the board by saying:
 
A)   I submit to men in BDSM, but not sexually.
2) Bobby Leather Love made me a bitch and I am torn.
iii) I am hetero nilla, bi-BDSM.

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Submission is not a gift... it is plunder!
Where there is a whip, there is a way!
Dom/mes of a feather, beat the f*ck out of slaves together


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RE: Sexuality - 5/5/2006 2:21:43 AM   
MsMacComb


Posts: 808
Joined: 3/30/2005
From: My Mothers womb.
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl
..because someone can have *sex* with the opposite gender and not be bisexual or gay.........taking part in sexual acts doesn't define your sexuality....either in vanilla or bdsm.
agirl 

 
 
 I must be slow but if consensual sexual acts with other people don't define your sexuality than what does? If someone was turned off by members of their own sex, they wouldnt be having sex with that person right? So the opposite would be if someone was attracted to members of their own sex they would be either gay/lesbian or bisexual. Or what am I missing here?





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Not looking for anyone for anything, any time.

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