RE: M/s D/s Relationships

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: M/s D/s Relationships

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: M/s D/s Relationships

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: M/s D/s Relationships - 5/5/2006 10:25:26 AM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

quote:

Give me your own personal definition of what the D/s or M/s relationship is.

A dynamic between an owner and one (or more) who is owned where the owner has the right to exercise the authority and controls the direction on any given issue within their dynamic and the owned does not.

quote:

Is yours a TPE style relationship? What does that mean to you with regards to obedience?

If he commands, I obey. Most often, he compels or I just do because it's what I am meant to do or supposed to do.

quote:

Do you allow your sub/slave or if sub/slave are you allowed limits other than the standard moral ones?

I have no need for limits. If limits were needed or required, Himself wouldn't be the right owner for me.

quote:

With certain obvious restrictions; do you function in your day to day life like a “normal” couple?

Well, we eat, sleep, shower, etc., just like 'normal' people. ::chuckles::

quote:

What I mean by this is that living the “kink” 24/7 is a difficult proposition, so do you do whips and chains etc 24/7 or is your daily routine more normal while holding onto the D/s or M/s dynamic?

I don't think his job would appreciate it if he spent his working hours whipping me. That said, unless he's on the road, he works out of a home office so can, at the drop of a hat, whip me at his whim and often does. I have set chores depending on the day of the week which are subject to change if he needs me to do something different. Our lives are fairly structured but there is room for flexibility. After the work week and in the evenings you would be hard pressed to walk in and see the Cleavers hanging around.

quote:

Are there any out there who live the D/s or M/s life without the bdsm play? Or with only occasional bdsm play? If so how do you feel you are regarded/treated by the community here on CM and in real time?

The senses are important to both of us and we explore all of them quite frequently. BDSM feeds our senses. Charity feeds my soul. Power feeds my beast. I don't see how either an online or offline discussion group/community matters here. If someone asks a question, I'm happy to answer it, but I'm not going to be doing things differently to satisfy someone else's ideals. Himself and I have our 'own' way which works quite well for us and has for several years.

quote:

Do you think your online search would be easier or more difficult if you posted D/s or M/s is what you are looking for?

I have no opinion on this question as I have no personal experience with it.

quote:

Do you have protocols for other Doms/Dommes contacting the owned one?

I request they have respect for either my wedding ring or the collar. Most do, some don't. If they don't, I have a delete button online and feet to walk away off line. I've never needed anything more than those two things.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to twicehappy)

Profile

Post #: 21

RE: M/s D/s Relationships - 5/5/2006 11:41:16 AM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

Doing a little research here so would like to hear from anybody in a 24/7(not necessarily live in) D/s or M/s relationship.

Give me your own personal definition of what the D/s or M/s relationship is.

I have an M/s relationship and it basically means that he has the last word on everything. Things happen the way he likes them to, as a rule. I don't have a burning desire to *serve*, as such ( heresy, I know)..... I chose to live this way for personal reasons. I don't *need* it ...I am pragmatic mostly and know that life functions better this way, for me.

Is yours a TPE style relationship? What does that mean to you with regards to obedience?

Yes, it's a TPE relationship.....In regard to obedience, I mostly do the things required of me , sometimes I don't, but I always know that I should and suffer when I don't..lol

Do you allow your sub/slave or if sub/slave are you allowed limits other than the standard moral ones?

I don't have personal limits inside my relationship.

With certain obvious restrictions; do you function in your day to day life like a “normal” couple? What I mean by this is that living the “kink” 24/7 is a difficult proposition, so do you do whips and chains etc 24/7 or is your daily routine more normal while holding onto the D/s or M/s dynamic?

Day to day living has to done, by both of us. Going about routine life doesn't mean being a slave is put on hold. It's always there, it's what the relationship IS.

Are there any out there who live the D/s or M/s life without the bdsm play? Or with only occasional bdsm play? If so how do you feel you are regarded/treated by the community here on CM and in real time?

I don't regard any part of my life as *play*. I also don't think I am part of a CM community....and I have no idea how I'm regarded.

Do you think your online search would be easier or more difficult if you posted D/s or M/s is what you are looking for?

I haven't experience of searching.

Do you have protocols for other Doms/Dommes contacting the owned one? If so what are they?

I can speak to whoever I like and many Doms do contact me...it merely depends on how they behave toward me * usual thing , manners, general politeness* as to whether I continue chatting to them. There's no need for restrictions, as far as I can see.

Thank you all in advance, as many of you know from previous postings here the house PhoenixRisen is of a philosophical bent and your answers set off many a great debate.

You're welcome. Regards, agirl

(in reply to twicehappy)

Profile

Post #: 22

RE: M/s D/s Relationships - 5/6/2006 4:12:48 AM

twicehappy

Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

Celeste, your answers most closely resemble my own with the exception that as long as everything gets done neither Master nor Mistress give me a list. They may have something specific they need done that day but otherwise it’s up to me. Plus she and i are home together all day so a lot depends on her plans. Some would say we lack structure but that is not the case, i think it is more because we are bikers and our structure is different. I have to tell you i love this line;

quote:

I don't think his job would appreciate it if he spent his working hours whipping me.

It states so perfectly what so many others who are looking for 24/7 but have not lived it fail to grasp; you simply cannot stalk around in high heeled boots or chaps swinging a whip all day. But you are still always aware that you are a sub/slave or a Dom, it colors your days M/s within the scope of normal living.

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to BitaTruble)

Profile

Post #: 23

RE: M/s D/s Relationships - 5/6/2006 4:20:46 AM

twicehappy

Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: fyreredsub

quote:

Do you have protocols for other Doms/Dommes contacting the owned one? If so what are they?

most definately, if anyone wishes to speak with this girl they must petition Master/Mistress, unless of course slave then it is allowed.

Do you find there are those who attempt to circumnavigate this rule?

We are an M/M/s household not Gorean but we expect Doms/Dommes who wish to chat with me to request permission first. Never have they denied this unless the request was made for inappropriate reasons. Nor do they expect to be asked each time, only the initial time. Yet there have been those who having been told to follow proper protocol still persist to the point of one of my owners having to be more than a little rude.

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to fyreredsub)

Profile

Post #: 24

RE: M/s D/s Relationships - 5/6/2006 7:57:35 AM

fyreredsub

Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline

Master and Mistress have both in the past had to deal with it.
One was quite the respectful Dom and it was while this girl was under Their protection and in negotitations and was not yet under consideration for collar.
the other was very recent and not thro this site and well Mistress took care of it.His intentions were not honorable in Their opinion.
When this girl is written she staetes to whomever, they must speak to Master/Mistress.Generally the writer never does

and that ends it. Some seem to ignore what is written in her profile.
*smiles*,once Master was logged into this ones acct here and got a chat request from a Dom

.
this one rarely gets written anymore and she is pleased with that.

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to twicehappy)

Profile

Post #: 25

RE: M/s D/s Relationships - 5/6/2006 9:30:08 AM

fyreredsub

Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline

this one needs to make a pre-java quota correction

Master was emailed while in her account,sorry for the confusion.the brain wasnt fully functional yet.

quote:

ORIGINAL: fyreredsub

Master and Mistress have both in the past had to deal with it.
One was quite the respectful Dom and it was while this girl was under Their protection and in negotitations and was not yet under consideration for collar.
the other was very recent and not thro this site and well Mistress took care of it.His intentions were not honorable in Their opinion.
When this girl is written she staetes to whomever, they must speak to Master/Mistress.Generally the writer never does and that ends it. Some seem to ignore what is written in her profile.
*smiles*,once Master was logged into this ones acct here and got a chat request from a Dom.
this one rarely gets written anymore and she is pleased with that.

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to fyreredsub)

Profile

Post #: 26

RE: M/s D/s Relationships - 5/6/2006 7:34:57 PM

Rayne58

Posts: 746
Joined: 2/22/2005
From: Sydney Australia
Status: offline

Give me your own personal definition of what the D/s or M/s relationship is.

Ours is D/s (Dom/sub) - for us it means the dynamic is always there. I serve Him and He takes care of me (emotionally and physically)

Is yours a TPE style relationship? What does that mean to you with regards to obedience?

Ours is a loving relationship first with the D/s second. He asks, I obey. I also take charge at times when He is ill.

Do you allow your sub/slave or if sub/slave are you allowed limits other than the standard moral ones?

We both have limits, luckily they are much the same.

With certain obvious restrictions; do you function in your day to day life like a “normal” couple? What I mean by this is that living the “kink” 24/7 is a difficult proposition, so do you do whips and chains etc 24/7 or is your daily routine more normal while holding onto the D/s or M/s dynamic?

We are just like any other couple. I'm available to Him whenever He wishes for anything. However Master has chronic ill health and much of the time He does not feel well. The dynamic is always there with me taking care of Him in our daily lives. Kinky play is limited by His health status at the time but we manage to have a healthy sex life

Are there any out there who live the D/s or M/s life without the bdsm play? Or with only occasional bdsm play? If so how do you feel you are regarded/treated by the community here on CM and in real time?

We aren't very active in the scene but have a couple of friends in the lifestyle who see us as just part of the lifestyle even though we are not as caught up in the protocol as they are. I feel our dynamic is just as accepted here on CM

Do you think your online search would be easier or more difficult if you posted D/s or M/s is what you are looking for?

Doesn't apply as we found each other on another site as friends before we even became a couple. I was a complete novice when it came to D/s but it's seemed to come naturally to me.

Do you have protocols for other Doms/Dommes contacting the owned one? If so what are they?

I'm allowed to chat to anyone and Master doesn't restrict my computer access. However it is made clear that I have a Dom and we are not interested in third parties for play unless they are female and bi.

(in reply to twicehappy)

Profile

Post #: 27

RE: M/s D/s Relationships - 5/6/2006 11:19:15 PM

Ceyx

Posts: 89
Joined: 8/23/2005
Status: offline

I wouldn't presume to define 'the M/s relationship.' I believe that every such relationship is unique. In mine, miss lives my vision of her, so far as it's possible. Just as important is the fact that she loves the way I see her, that it corresponds to the woman she wants to be.

I expect miss to obey any command that I give her, to the best of her ability. In turn, she trusts that I will always bear her best interests in mind. I understand her obedience in terms of a willing spirit and a heartfelt effort, rather than in terms of success or failure. I would allow her limits of her own if she felt that she needed them, but we know each other well enough-- and I love her deeply enough-- that she can operate safely within my limits for her.

Miss and I live apart, so obviously we're not being kinky 24/7. We both live normal lives, but miss does have a weekly schedule that I've planned for her. She has certain rituals and activities that she'll observe on a regular basis, some of which I share with her. I'll also give her specific tasks to perform for me, things that can be slipped into the context of her vanilla life.

As our relationship is presently long-distance, much of what we do together doesn't directly involve BDSM play (although some does). I think we've been treated decently here thus far, although naturally some people aren't going to 'get it' or see the appeal of what we do. They're entitled to their opinions.

I'm not searching for anyone, so I can't say whether I'd have more or less success if I listed an M/s relationship as my goal.

I generally prefer it if people write me first before writing miss, simply because it tends to cut down on the drooling advances. That said, if someone is respectful and has something worthwhile to say, and she's so inclined, I'm happy to let miss chat with them.

(in reply to twicehappy)

Profile

Post #: 28

RE: M/s D/s Relationships - 5/7/2006 6:51:59 PM

twicehappy

Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ceyx

I wouldn't presume to define 'the M/s relationship.' I believe that every such relationship is unique.

I love the amout of feeling you put into your post. What i was asking for by way of definition was what do you consider the beginning basics, before you get involved in the emotional parts.

I congratulate you on your luck and hope you get to realize 24/7 living together soon.

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to Ceyx)

Profile

Post #: 29

RE: M/s D/s Relationships - 5/7/2006 7:25:28 PM

RadioFlyer

Posts: 10
Joined: 3/28/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy
Give me your own personal definition of what the D/s or M/s relationship is.

Our relationship is very simple. I feel fulfilled by doing anything that can make her life easier. I obey her in all respects possible, and am grateful for all the different ways she provides for me. There are too many to go into, but sometimes I feel a bit spoiled :P

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

Is yours a TPE style relationship? What does that mean to you with regards to obedience?

Mistress allows me to be in charge, most often in the bedroom, when she can sense that I am feeling aggressive. She is always quick to put me back in line when things are finished, though.

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

Do you allow your sub/slave or if sub/slave are you allowed limits other than the standard moral ones?

I suppose I could be, but I trust my Mistress implicitly and have not ever asked for any sort of limits as I am sure she would never put me through anything I could not handle

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy
With certain obvious restrictions; do you function in your day to day life like a “normal” couple? What I mean by this is that living the “kink” 24/7 is a difficult proposition, so do you do whips and chains etc 24/7 or is your daily routine more normal while holding onto the D/s or M/s dynamic?

Our daily routine is often interrupted by friends of her 17 year-old son (who, along with his friends, is unaware that we are even a couple) but we have been at this for over a year and have learned to adapt and not even be bothered by it any more.

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

Are there any out there who live the D/s or M/s life without the bdsm play? Or with only occasional bdsm play? If so how do you feel you are regarded/treated by the community here on CM and in real time?

Our aspect of BDSM is much more obedience-oriented than the typical vision of BDSM, though we still use the toys and go into scenes every now and then. I believe that that is just our personal way, and do not question whether it is "true" BDSM at all. I don't think anyone in the community would think any less of us because of that.

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

Do you think your on-line search would be easier or more difficult if you posted D/s or M/s is what you are looking for?

Don't know. I don't need to search on-line :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

Do you have protocols for other Doms/Dommes contacting the owned one? If so what are they?

What? I'm hers, silly!

< Message edited by RadioFlyer -- 5/7/2006 7:28:52 PM >

(in reply to twicehappy)

Profile

Post #: 30

RE: M/s D/s Relationships - 5/8/2006 6:21:56 AM

MIstressCyn127

Posts: 10
Joined: 12/26/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy
Give me your own personal definition of what the D/s or M/s relationship is.

I basically take charge of most of his life at this point ( he now lives with me after having a p/t relationship for 18 moths or so). H e has protocols and routines and rules to follow that cover our acitivites in private and in public. If a situation comes up that hasnt been previously discussed as far as how to handle behaviourly, he defers to me and we go thru how to specifically handle something afterwards when we have a moment. I have a vision for his development emotionally, mentally , physically, spiritually and we work towards that.

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

Is yours a TPE style relationship? What does that mean to you with regards to obedience?

WIth exception to the fact that I do occasionally like to bottom with regards to play/sex we live the rest of the time in our rolls, so to speak. He does what I ask him and carries out his routines and tasks, and when he doesnt we have a lil behavior modification/snicker.

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

Do you allow your sub/slave or if sub/slave are you allowed limits other than the standard moral ones?

We never specifically discussed limits, Im not a hard core sadist, nor is he a masochist so on that front there isnt much to discuss between us really. I dont believe i push him harder than he can handle, although sometimes at the time he would beg to differ, but afterwards he is ok again. I guess he trusts me, and I know him well so there is no need to be specific.

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

With certain obvious restrictions; do you function in your day to day life like a “normal” couple? What I mean by this is that living the “kink” 24/7 is a difficult proposition, so do you do whips and chains etc 24/7 or is your daily routine more normal while holding onto the D/s or M/s dynamic?

We have a "routine " for when we are alone at the house, and one for when we have an audience. ALone he has specific clothes ( or lack there of) to wear, and rules about where he can sit, how he can eat etc etc..When others are here ( which is most of the afternoon/evening as I am a parent) the routine is more clandestine i guess you could say. He is not allowed to eat or drink without being offered by me ( wiht exception to water) he has to ask to pee, he opens doors , does what I ask of him etc etc.. so I guess we live it the majority of the time just in a toned down sort of way.

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

Are there any out there who live the D/s or M/s life without the bdsm play? Or with only occasional bdsm play? If so how do you feel you are regarded/treated by the community here on CM and in real time?

We play once or twice a week, depending on our work/kid/chore/bs schedules. I dont know how im regarded so that is a non issue. We dont intereact with the local community, as there isnt really one all that close to where we live and the facility that is about an hour away isnt convenient for us to attend now, we plan to in the future at soem point though.

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

Do you think your on-line search would be easier or more difficult if you posted D/s or M/s is what you are looking for?

I dont search really , other than we would like to find a bi-male to develop a relationship with for play sessions regularly.

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

Do you have protocols for other Doms/Dommes contacting the owned one? If so what are they?

I dont loan him out at this time. He doesnt search nor solicit and I dont loan him.

(in reply to RadioFlyer)

Profile

Post #: 31

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: M/s D/s Relationships

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Spam Policy

0.078