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Tasks for a sub at home - 3/5/2011 3:49:40 AM

nunofdabove

Posts: 6
Joined: 3/5/2011
Status: offline

Hi All,

Long time lurker, first time poster here. I just want to begin by saying what a great community this is.

So myself and my long-term girlfriend used to enjoy some bdsm play on a semi-regular basis, there was a local club we would go to once a month or so and we would play at home too.

For various reasons (life, employment, health), we've had very little play over the last year or so, our sex-life is still reasonably good, but it's mostly vanilla.

The circumstances are changing now and we would very much like to get back to our old dynamic and introducing kink/bdsm back into our relationship. To help with this, I had thought of having a daily challenge for my sub while I am away at work and she is at home (she only works 2 days a week at present)
I plan to leave a note for her when I leave in the morning (quite early, she would still be asleep) and depending on how she does with her challenge that day, there will be either punishments or rewards in the evening when I return.

BDSM is primarily a sexual part of our relationship, so challenges will focus around this, they will not be chores or similar.

I was wondering if any others had done similar before, or had any suggestions for challenges, some I've thought of are below;
(Note: She will not lie to me as a submissive, so I can trust that I will receive an honest report of her progress with these tasks)

1) I will set an alarm to go off once every hour during the day, her instructions will be to hit the snooze button once the alarm goes off and proceed to masturbate, without orgasm, until the snooze buzzer sounds. She does not have any difficulty achieving orgasm and is able to make herself do so quite easily so this should be challenging for her.

2) On a day when I know she is going to town to do some shopping or similar, I will instruct her to do so with either a butt plug or vaginal eggs inserted.

3) At a specified time before I am due home, I will instruct her to put on cuffs/collar and kneel in wait for me. (quite a simple task, really)

Has anyone any other suggestions or thoughts/comments?

Thanks
Nun Of D Above

Post #: 1

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/5/2011 5:08:27 AM

Aileen1968

Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline

I scrubbed the tub.
In the process of removing bad pineapple, duck and evil monkey wallpaper borders.
Cooked him lots of food.
Will be washing the windows and screens when it warms up a bit.
Repainting all of the rooms.
Etc. Etc. Etc.

Doing things for him, even though they are just every day things are like mental foreplay for me.
If he has told me that he wants something done, even if it's raking the leaves, then it means that it is important to him and becomes the top thing on my list of things to do.
And then he throws in things like crawling nude for him in stockings and heels.
Strangely...both types of tasks arouse me.

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Post #: 2

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/5/2011 7:34:18 AM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

How the hell lass am I expected to go to bed and have an image of you crawling nude in stockings and heels.?????????? Farque... now where's that blow up sheep.. Naa gave it to the Kiwis next door ..... Ohhh Neets, lover.. Put those stockings and heels on babe......

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to Aileen1968)

Post #: 3

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/5/2011 8:09:08 AM

Hillwilliam

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Joined: 8/27/2008
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Skimpily dressed car washes are always fun. If there is enough privacy and not a buncha pubescent pervy kids in the neighborhood (fenced back yard is good) Said car wash should be done wearing one of your white tee shirts and nuthin else.

Kink, meet practical.

(in reply to IronBear)

Post #: 4

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/5/2011 8:58:51 AM

porcelaine

Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: nunofdabove

Has anyone any other suggestions or thoughts/comments?

Greetings,

In the past I was not allowed to masturbate without his consent. However, he did require several tasks that reinforced my sexual slavery. One of them involved a small piece of ribbon that he'd given. There was significance involved in the colors chosen. It was expected that I would lubricate it on a weekly basis and apply it each morning to my wrist. It was a mental tactic to impress what I was (to him) and combat my inability to accept that part of our relationship. And it worked.

Namaste,

~porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to nunofdabove)

Post #: 5

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/5/2011 9:06:15 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Has she been taught not to cum without permission? Because expecting her to do so without teaching her how means you should be the one punished if she fails. If she's going to teach herself everything, then why isn't she topping you?

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Post #: 6

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/5/2011 11:48:11 PM

nunofdabove

Posts: 6
Joined: 3/5/2011
Status: offline

Porcelaine: Thank you for your input, could you explain the significance of the colors further?

Thanks

Nuno

< Message edited by nunofdabove -- 3/5/2011 11:53:12 PM >

(in reply to porcelaine)

Post #: 7

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/5/2011 11:51:41 PM

nunofdabove

Posts: 6
Joined: 3/5/2011
Status: offline

Yes she is quite capable of not cumming without permission.

She is not the one topping, I am the Dom, she is my sub.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 8

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/6/2011 12:29:30 AM

phoenixmoonn13

Posts: 398
Joined: 6/11/2010
Status: offline

for me not allowed to touch unless master tells me to no use of toys to mastabate either. no cumming with out permission. no underwear when at home and only wear skirts. when out can wear as i wish ideally skirts but nto imperative.
asking permission to leave the room get into bed out of bed go out etc etc. cooking washing cleaning etc. and making sure i relax do things for me in teh day and on his days off to have no house duties (ok other than cooking and making coffee) just to be at his feet and do things i enjoy.

(in reply to nunofdabove)

Post #: 9

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/6/2011 3:59:20 AM

porcelaine

Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: nunofdabove

Porcelaine: Thank you for your input, could you explain the significance of the colors further?

Thanks

Nuno

Greetings Nuno,

The color significance was associated with the stages of progress. I suspect that he made correlations with the emotional element being impacted. For instance, the first color was red. It was very apropos. I felt like he was tearing away parts of my person and the trickles of his actions were readily evident. It hurt, but only for a time. There were valleys and peaks to be surmounted.

Given my reluctance to embrace slavery in its totality, particularly in the manner he wished, there were areas of resistance that needed to be addressed. He attacked them from several angles. The ribbon provided a visual reminder of what had been accomplished thus far. In spite of my discomfort with its use, I reached a point where it became a positive symbol in my mind and one I readily embraced. I wore it without fail both in and outdoors and began to set aside my ideas in deference to his.

However, I was not made aware of these things ahead of time nor did I know when the next would be given. This allowed a certain measure of intimacy when each milestone occurred. We'd reflect and offer mutual feedback on where I stood at present. I began to take pride in my accomplishments.

Namaste,

~porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to nunofdabove)

Post #: 10

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/6/2011 8:50:52 AM

LillyBoPeep

Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
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i guess i don't understand why you have to be "taught" not to come without permission? if you feel it coming on, can't you just take a break and let the feeling subside? "i have not been given permission to go to 10, so i'll just stay around 8." seems pretty straight forward to me...

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"Obey your Master." Metallica

(in reply to porcelaine)

Post #: 11

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/6/2011 10:15:23 AM

porcelaine

Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

i guess i don't understand why you have to be "taught" not to come without permission? if you feel it coming on, can't you just take a break and let the feeling subside? "i have not been given permission to go to 10, so i'll just stay around 8." seems pretty straight forward to me...

I was not permitted to engage in self pleasure unless the release was approved. However, he did orchestrate instances where I worked myself into a frenzy only to hear the proverbial stop. The buzz kill usually ended in a fit of laughter for him. However, I do recall that this wasn't habitual. It was used in tandem with the restriction and generally happened when a sizable amount of time had elapsed. In other words, he knew I was fidgety and chose to exploit it. I think that's an important factor of sexual controls. When they're overused the body learns to adapt. I was never allowed to get to that point.

Namaste,

~porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)

Post #: 12

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/7/2011 3:40:37 PM

DevilishEnvy

Posts: 48
Joined: 2/16/2011
Status: offline

You can give set tasks. Like have her write out things she'd enjoy or would like to do. Or research toys she wants to try. Or certain things like pictures, movies, lit erotica stories that arouse her. If you both have picture phones, you could text an order and have her take a picture of her completing the order. Have her go to fetlife.com and make a list of fetishes and how she feels about them. Give her certain vague clues all day about something you want to do when you get home. Have her clean a room naked and send pics of herself doing it. Leave littles notes with commands in strange places. Tie her to a piece of furniture with a ribbon and give her certain tasks that must be performed before she can get up (just makes sure she has scissors handy for emergencies). Have her text and ask permission for everything that she wants or needs to do, no matter how small. Buy a bdsm book and have her handcopy a story from it of something you want to try, then tell her about halfway through the day that you want to try it. Phone sex on breaks...

If you search the forums for search topics : training, games, play, techniques, tasks, and such things, you will find tons more.

Damn, I think I broke either my brain or my fingers. lol. Hope this helps!

(in reply to porcelaine)

Post #: 13

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/7/2011 4:08:49 PM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

Assign her the task of flipping the office chair(s) over and cleaning
all the hair/thread/string that get tangled around the wheels.

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When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to nunofdabove)

Post #: 14

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/11/2011 1:34:17 PM

nunofdabove

Posts: 6
Joined: 3/5/2011
Status: offline

Thank you for your input DevilishEnvy, those are quite good ideas, I'll also search the forum as you suggested.

quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

Assign her the task of flipping the office chair(s) over and cleaning
all the hair/thread/string that get tangled around the wheels.

Oh that's just mean!

I like it :)

< Message edited by nunofdabove -- 3/11/2011 1:35:12 PM >

(in reply to DevilishEnvy)

Post #: 15

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/11/2011 2:39:40 PM

Arpig

Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline

quote:

Skimpily dressed car washes are always fun. If there is enough privacy and not a buncha pubescent pervy kids in the neighborhood (fenced back yard is good) Said car wash should be done wearing one of your white tee shirts and nuthin else.

And if there isn't a lot of privacy...just do it a bikini

_____________________________

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Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

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Post #: 16

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/11/2011 3:00:50 PM

Arpig

Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
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OK, sexually oriented tasks for around the house...I would go with Hill's basic premise of combining practicality with the kink. Have her do all her normal household tasks...but just add a sexual aspect. Have her do a certain portion of her daily tasks with her breasts bound, or clamps on, or a big plug in. Its hard to do without knowing her, for some girls just being nude doing the housework will be enough to get them aroused, and for others it would be nothing. It really depends on what you guys are into. You know her best.

I have found, that no matter what the activity, the more interactive you make it, the more fun it is. One idea along these lines would be rather than leaving her a note, have various sexual tasks written on slips of paper in a jar...phone her at lunch time and have her draw a slip and read it out to you...if she's into being called dirty names, then write them that way: rather than "masturbate" write "play with your slutty cunt" (yeah I'm not that good at sort of thing am I).

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran

(in reply to Arpig)

Post #: 17

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/13/2011 12:33:16 AM

DMFParadox

Posts: 1405
Joined: 9/11/2007
Status: offline

Yeah. Here's a suggestion I picked up from that ol' pervert, John Norman.

Inspect her, on a regular basis. Check her skin, muscle tone, ask her to move for you; and really learn her body. Tricky to introduce the concept as more D/s than just doctor's visit, but I've done it a few times, and pulled off right it can be incredibly intimate and reaffirming. Plus, if she knows she'll be inspected sometime when you get home, she'll be thinking about it off and on throughout her day. The way that worked best for me was post coital; I just started messing with her body, told her I wanted to just see and feel how she was put together, that she fascinated me; then a couple days later, did it again, and told her some things that had minor changes. Then told her I wanted to do it again next time I came over. Got her all kinds of hot and bothered.

< Message edited by DMFParadox -- 3/13/2011 12:35:04 AM >

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"The role of gender in society is the most complicated thing I’ve ever spent a lot of time learning about, and I’ve spent a lot of time learning about quantum mechanics." - Randall Munroe

(in reply to Arpig)

Post #: 18

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/13/2011 4:22:55 AM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

All duties, tasks and other instructions (detailed) are part of the DUTY STATEMENT a bound document which is required reading weekly as it has attached duty roasters (where applicable) and updated materials and timetables..

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to DMFParadox)

Post #: 19

RE: Tasks for a sub at home - 3/13/2011 9:52:55 AM

nunofdabove

Posts: 6
Joined: 3/5/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

All duties, tasks and other instructions (detailed) are part of the DUTY STATEMENT a bound document which is required reading weekly as it has attached duty roasters (where applicable) and updated materials and timetables..

Yea..... we're not 24/7 TPE, we don't do duty statements and documents.

(in reply to IronBear)

Post #: 20

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