RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play?

RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (Full Version)

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grandgnu -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/17/2011 4:06:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SexyBossyBBW It sounds to me, like you are seeking a lady to join in something, without a relationship, but one which might land he in jail, if she doesn't use he mind and avoind this casual sounding situation. M It sounds to me like you don't understand my play

Killerangel -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/17/2011 5:50:13 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: grandgnu quote: ORIGINAL: SexyBossyBBW It sounds to me, like you are seeking a lady to join in something, without a relationship, but one which might land he in jail, if she doesn't use he mind and avoind this casual sounding situation. M It sounds to me like you don't understand my play OP, I thought she had a point. What is it that she doesn't understand?

DarkSteven -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/17/2011 6:05:44 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: grandgnu quote: ORIGINAL: SexyBossyBBW It sounds to me, like you are seeking a lady to join in something, without a relationship, but one which might land he in jail, if she doesn't use he mind and avoind this casual sounding situation. M It sounds to me like you don't understand my play None of us do, because evidently there's something you haven't told us. Let me take a stab at the missing ingredient. OP evidently wants to FEEL like he is in mortal danger. I get the feeling that it's the perception of helplessness, of being brutally beaten that rocks his boat. So then the question becomes, how does he feel completely out of control and brutalized, while at the same time being safe? Did I nail it, or do you want to elucidate, OP?

stellauk -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/17/2011 6:31:24 AM)
Have you ever taken it into consideration that maybe your assumption that some girl's desire to kick your ass is her kink might be false? You've been somewhat critical of what other people have suggested. Are you just as critical of your own thinking and reasoning when you don't get what you want? I'm not trying to make a judgment call here. However if you're surrounded by women, you want them to do something simple like kick your ass, but you're not getting anywhere then just maybe the problem isn't the girls, it isn't the websites or other people. It just might be the way you are going about it. Okay, so girls kicking your ass is what arouses you. I get that. But how important to you is that the two come together? How about taking the kink and your arousal out of the equation and just concentrate on getting your ass kicked. Might not be perfect, but you get to experience a kicking from woman, and surely that in itself is progress, is it not?

LadyNTrainer -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/17/2011 10:49:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven Let me take a stab at the missing ingredient. OP evidently wants to FEEL like he is in mortal danger. I get the feeling that it's the perception of helplessness, of being brutally beaten that rocks his boat. If this is true, then it accurately describes my own personal relationship. My pet gets off on being brutalized and threatened, genuinely terrorized and in fear of his life. And I get off on doing that to him. Rough body play and brutal beating is definitely my thing. I think I love him most of all when he is bruised and crying and shaking, cowering under my upraised hand. His eyes are wide and staring, poised on the trembling edge of fear and worship. Beautiful victim, helpless object; the imagery is powerful and compelling to me. Yes, this is my kink. But the key words here are "personal relationship". I have less than zero interest in sharing this degree of intimacy and intensity with some random stranger whom I do not know, do not have a personal relationship with, and am not particularly attracted to or interested in. Same goes for every other femdom I know who is into this kink, or any other kink for that matter. No personal relationship = no thanks. By personal relationship I don't mean we have to be married with 2.5 kids and a white picket fence; I mean we need to be friends and have a foundation of mutual liking, consideration, trust, respect and appreciation for one another's company as human beings. Guys who just want to get their kink on with me and leave are just not that much fun for me, unless they have something else to offer that does make it fun for me or worth my while. What have you got that is special enough to make it fun for me, since you are not offering anything else I want? Are you incredibly hot? Do you have a gym-toned bod that is worth my time and energy just for the fun of getting my hands on it? If not, go to the back of the queue. There's a zillion random do-me boys in line already, and I'm not getting to any of them in this lifetime because I'm too busy playing with my personal partners and friends. quote: So then the question becomes, how does he feel completely out of control and brutalized, while at the same time being safe? We both have good imaginations and can suspend disbelief quite a ways. Sometimes we roleplay that we are different characters. Mostly that's not even necessary; my pet is in genuine fear and awe of my physical strength, and he likes it that way. I would never harm him, but I do like to brutalize and hurt him, mostly with my bare hands. But, y'know, just not into doing this stuff with people I don't care about and who don't care about me. It is much too intimate and intense for that. It pushes my own sexual and emotional buttons very hard to do this to someone, and I'm just not willing to go there with a stranger. The reason I'm not up for a heavy beatdown scene as casual kink play is not because it's not my kink, but because it is my kink. It is my kink in a major way, in a raw and savage and primal way that is intensely personal and that lives at the core of me, and I just don't want to share that much of myself with a stranger.

kalikshama -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/17/2011 11:05:04 AM)
quote: You have to think about how the femdom mind is wired. QFT

LadyPact -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/17/2011 11:12:48 AM)
OP, it's not that folks don't get what kind of set up that you're looking for. It boils down to co-topping (quick definition, play where more than one top is involved) no matter what kind of scene or the severity of which is involved. A "top" is anybody doing the action during the scene or play. Consider them the "do-er". What you're trying to put together isn't impossible. At the same time, there just aren't that many females that have the same interest as being part of a gang to carry it out. Those that do can find the situation fairly easily because they already know other Dominant women to do it with. I co-top for a variety of reasons. The ones that happen most frequently are because of teaching techniques or because I happen to be more sadistic than the other Top and that person needed that to pull off the result that they are trying to achieve. Yes, I enjoy these topping scenarios because I'm getting to be sadistic, but the other element in there that is included is I consider it doing a favor for a friend. That's why I suggested way back on the beginning of this thread to have your wife get to know other tops. It works. The way this thread has come across is that you are attempting a different method, which kind of looks like "open casting call". Open casting call rarely works because even though the kink might be shared, there's no incentive to participate in it with you. People don't know you. There's no reason for them to want to do this with you over and above any other Tom, Dick, or Harry that comes along. There's no reason for them to have any faith in you that you won't call the cops or try to stick them with your medical bill. They don't know what kind of person you are or there are going to be problems for them later on. Change your method and you'll change your success rate.

Lucylastic -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/17/2011 11:27:10 AM)
I honestly think this is something that the OP is going to be looking for for a very long time. I dont think its an unrealistic kink, but hard to fulfill in the confines of the OPs limits(no pro, no relationship etc etc) Volunteering yourself seems to be the best idea Ive seen. Try going to a fet event and set up a stalll ...Kick my balls for charity stall or something? of course thats asking for trouble, but hey whatever swings your boat...just make sure you know the consequences:) And altho munches are great to meet prospective play partners, to get to know them, many of them, (at least here) dont go to munches they just go to the club nights/play parties altho YMMV.

Arpig -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/17/2011 11:42:36 AM)
quote: I think I love him most of all when he is bruised and crying and shaking, cowering under my upraised hand. His eyes are wide and staring, poised on the trembling edge of fear and worship. Beautiful victim, helpless object; the imagery is powerful and compelling to me. Yes, this is my kink. Whew! Now that's hot! You're my kind of lady. And I agree with you about there being little or no interest to it outside of a relationship. Brutalizing some random person just isn't the same as brutalizing someone you love. I don't know for a fact, but I suspect it is the same from the other side of the whip as well...that the fact that the person dealing out the abuse is the person who loves you and who also treats you with loving gentleness at other times would, in my mind at least, make the whole thing that much more intimate, intense and powerful. There's also the point that each person reacts differently, and the longer you have been beating a person, the better you know them and their body...the better you can beat them.

LadyNTrainer -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/17/2011 1:29:47 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact Open casting call rarely works because even though the kink might be shared, there's no incentive to participate in it with you. People don't know you. There's no reason for them to want to do this with you over and above any other Tom, Dick, or Harry that comes along. There's no reason for them to have any faith in you that you won't call the cops or try to stick them with your medical bill. They don't know what kind of person you are or there are going to be problems for them later on. Some really, really good points here. Women are slightly less vulnerable than men in this respect, but the fact is if I engage in a heavy enough scene to leave marks and bruises, and that person has buyer's remorse the next day and calls the cops, I am fucked six ways to Sunday. My liability is a lot worse if I caused real medical damage because they have a pre-existing condition that they either didn't tell me about or weren't aware of themselves. So, yeah, no. I'm not willing to engage in heavy play with someone I don't know and trust pretty damn well. I need to be able to trust them not to sue me or call the cops on me, and I need to know their medical history and limitations so that I don't cause damage bad enough for an ER visit with possibly automatic police involvement and subsequent medical bills which I could very well be held responsible for.

grandgnu -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/17/2011 4:32:51 PM)
The examples I provided from the drunk chicks attacking random dudes was fantasy that gets me excited, not actual play we practice. My wife and I utilize safe words and limits. Generally mild to moderate pain and plenty of humiliation. There can be some scraped up skin or bruises here or there, but never any broken bones or eyes hanging from their sockets. Anyway, I get the picture. We need to look at at least getting to know some people first before playing, thanks for the education :)

Dastan -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/20/2011 10:11:39 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Jennislut quote: Step 3: Buy vicodin, naproxene, bandages and an ice pack. seriously good advice! I can probab operate in the case of deep lacerations and internal bleeding or osteomuscular damage....let me know when the OP plans on doing it, I would need the practice, my sutiring technique needs some work..... But I wonder if my professors would consider it worth extra credits...? maybe even extracurricular practice ?

LadyDelilahDeb -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/27/2011 3:32:34 AM)
Fast reply: I get it, you want a service top who is willing to play with a stranger, who is not looking for a relationship, and who meets your specific criteria as to age and other attractiveness factors. Get thee to a "TNG" munch; it stands for "The Next Generation". Usually an under-30 or 21 to 35 crowd. But you're missing a bet; you want skill, you take it where you find it, and older dominas are the more likely. You know, there's a cartoon describing just what you want: a submissive woman willing to pretend to be a faux dominatrix. Even female sadists (dominant or not) are unlikely to be interested in this resoundingly ho-hum offer. I've seen them in action, and while they may qualify as full-fledged sadists, they're not interested in conforming to your ideal of womanhood. Lady Delilah Deb P.s. I get CM come-ons from these sorts periodically. So far, exactly one has met with me and discussed my requirements in a play partner (never mind whether or not I and he might suit in a D/s relationship, at first meeting it's too soon to tell!) And because he was married to a vanilla woman, my first and always requirement was that he have permission to play from his spouse. An honest gent, he didn't get it. The rest of them were looking, as you are, for some fast gratification from a do-me domina, and have not gotten it.

SexyBossyBBW -> RE: How Do We Find Sadistic Girls For Play? (3/27/2011 3:57:02 AM)
I get offers from younger/older men frequently, to provide severe spankings, and they would even tribute. My reply is, I would NEVER hurt anyone, I didn't trust implicitly. and golddigging is for amateurs What the OP proposes is possible, but I hope the girl who joins is smart, and can legally get out, if things go too far, and he ends up in a hospital looking like he's been through domestic abuse. M

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