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collarworthy -> In Urantiams defense.......... (5/8/2006 10:23:42 PM)
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When my sub Urantiam told me he was posting threads on this site for advice, I was glad to see he had an audience to help answer the questions that plague him, even tho I knew he was opening himself up to potential ridicule. But Urantiam is a very "by the book" kind of sub; he lives for the written word; whereas I'm more of a "fly by the seat of my pants" kinda gal. I learn something new about myself every day, such as the fact that my need to be dominated is purely sexual. In the bedroom, I cry like a kitten and beg to be used; in the business world, I go toe to toe with management and would rather die than be told what to do. let alone get on all fours and accept a whipping for someones personal gratification. . I'm grateful that I made this discovery before it was too late. Therefore, when Urantiam told me he wanted to ask you people online their advice on this subject, I saw no real harm.
But after reading the responses he's gotten, I'm a little disheartened at some of the feedback he's been receiving. I dont think anyone is intending to hurt his feelings, but I fear they are nonetheless. Urantiam is a very emotional person. He feels things deeply. I dont see what can be gained by poking fun at his genuine quest for advice, and while I thank those who have answered him sincerely, I would suggest that those who have nothing nice to say should say nothing at all. In particular, the concern about us having spent any " real time " together, altho warranted, shouldn't be the main issue here. We have spent hours and hours on the phone, and webcams are a wonderful way to prove whether a person is "real" or not. While I can understand those who question the viability of "love" on his side in such a new relationship, I have to ask: in a world where people use others as human toilets; where subs / slaves are beaten and tortured in their quest for " happiness"; where people are shoving ponies tails up their butts and allowing themsevles to be branded like cattle to prove their worthiness, how can anyone question whether its possible for a sub to love someone so quickly. I will plead guilty to the fact that this relationship is moving at a fast pace, but that certainly didnt seem to bother any of the potential Doms I spoke to before realizing I wasn't capable of lasting in that arrangement. They had me hogtied and collared after the first five minutes. Suggestions of piercings and whippings and torture...oh my!
I dont have a Domme bone in my body, and Urantiam is aware of that fact.. I cant even punish my puppy when it pees on the floor. I would be just as happy for him to call me by my given name instead of Mistress, but it makes him happy to address me that way so I dont question it. Urantiams' feelings, altho intense, are stemmed merely from a desire to serve, and mine in return to his, are based on the need to be worshipped and cared for. He has no problem accepting the fact that I still seek dominants for sex, and I have no problem accepting the fact that he isnt capable of fulfilling me in that department. His relocation here will either work or it wont. But as no children or family are involved in this decision, neither of us can see where anyone can be hurt if it doesnt work out. And on a site where people hurt people every day, physically AND mentally, how can that be wrong? In closing, I ask that if you have to poke fun at someone, then please, poke it at me. My skin is much thicker than his, and the only place I can ever be hurt is in the bedroom. Urantiam is guilty of nothing more than being a complete submissive and seeking someone to serve. I only hope Im able to do him justice as his Mistress
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