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Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 1:15:58 PM

GhitaAmati

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I mean the collar itself. Not the relationship. I think we'll all pretty much agree that the collar itself is just a symbol, and in itself doesn't really define the relationship. Just like a wedding ring isn't what makes you married. If someone walks out the door for work one morning without their wedding ring on, they aren't somehow NOT married for the day until they get it back on, right?

So my question is, if we KNOW that we are still owned, or still own someone, even if the collar doesn't happen to currently be around the neck, why does having that collar even matter?

(No, Im not trying to be snarky or annoying. Im just having one of those days where I think too much. Im just curious about everyone's opinion on this one)

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 1:41:42 PM

GhitaAmati

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Just wanted to clarify....yes I know there is no right or wrong answer to this question, its just a personal matter. I'm just curious

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 1:42:12 PM

agirl

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Mine never comes off.

Yep, it's symbol, a meaningful one for us. It's loaded with memories, our commitment, how we feel about each other, it makes us smile, it makes us feel good, it's a reminder on bad days when we're grouchy with each other, it reminds us how far we've come together, it's a tangible mark of a very special intimate moment when we changed from friends to owner and owned.

If he'd given me something else instead of, it'd be the same. It's not the actual item, it's simply what it signified/signifies......to us.

That's what it is, I'm still, as you say, just as owned with or without it.

agirl

< Message edited by agirl -- 3/30/2011 1:44:13 PM >

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 1:46:59 PM

gothikbutterfly

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 2:19:17 PM

NihilusZero

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Since you're speaking of ownership (and a purely subjective issue):

quote:

Why does a collar matter?

Because the owner says it does.

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 2:43:13 PM

Aileen1968

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I like how mine looks.
I like the weight of it on my neck.
I like how his hand can fit between it and my neck and he can choke me with it.
I like that I am the only woman he has ever collared.
I like that he is the only man that has ever collared me.
I like that I don't even have a way to take it off...only he does.
I like that I can wear it around my kids and they don't give it a second thought.
I like that it really is a symbol of his love for me.
I like that I'd be quite happy wearing this for the rest of my life.
I like that it sets off airport security.
I like that in almost two years of it being around my neck, it's only been acknowledged two times as what it is by a stranger.
I like that everyone else thinks it's just a necklace.
I like that a dog leash can be attached to it.

etc. etc. etc.

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 2:55:55 PM

peppermint

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For him the collar and the collaring were very important. Therefore, if it is important to him, as an extention it is also important to me. He loves the symbols he puts on me to denote that I am his. He likes when others understand the symbolism of the items. There needs to be no other reasons.

< Message edited by peppermint -- 3/30/2011 2:57:38 PM >

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 2:58:17 PM

FukinTroll

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quote:

So my question is, if we KNOW that we are still owned, or still own someone, even if the collar doesn't happen to currently be around the neck, why does having that collar even matter?

It only matters to those that value the significance. How valuable or significant is it to you?

Slurp~

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 3:28:08 PM

SorceressJ

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Every single one of these answers is correct. I like that..

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 3:31:02 PM

Aileen1968

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

I like how mine looks.
I like the weight of it on my neck.
I like how his hand can fit between it and my neck and he can choke me with it.
I like that I am the only woman he has ever collared.
I like that he is the only man that has ever collared me.
I like that I don't even have a way to take it off...only he does.
I like that I can wear it around my kids and they don't give it a second thought.
I like that it really is a symbol of his love for me.
I like that I'd be quite happy wearing this for the rest of my life.
I like that it sets off airport security.
I like that in almost two years of it being around my neck, it's only been acknowledged two times as what it is by a stranger.
I like that everyone else thinks it's just a necklace.
I like that a dog leash can be attached to it.

etc. etc. etc.

Oh......And when I get lost nice people know where to send me home

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 3:33:26 PM

FukinTroll

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SorceressJ

Every single one of these answers is correct. I like that..

Hey! If I do not get a gold star... at least a smiley face... I'll take my toys and go home!

Slurp~

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 3:35:42 PM

peachgirl

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He travels a lot for work. For me it is a nice touchstone throughout the day, when I am missing him. Like right this second.

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 3:40:06 PM

leadership527

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It matters because symbols matter. Symbols matter more the more meaning and emotion we invest in them. There's a reason that Carol has never removed her wedding ring... not even for a second... and the only time I did was for surgery and getting it back on again was literally my first conscious thought after waking up -- get ring... get home.

I've recently devalued the meaning of the collar on purpose so that it could come off her neck. So now it's on sometimes, off others. But it also is no longer the special symbol it used to be. Now it's more like a meaningful piece of jewelry.

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 3:43:07 PM

ResidentSadist

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Besides the romantic symbolic meaning in the relationship, unlike a wedding ring, it symbolizes and acts as a reminder of your status in the relationship. The collar is usually fit to accept a leash because you are to be lead. It can be objectifying, you are a pet or chattel being cared for and subject to the rule of your keeper(s).

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 3:45:39 PM

NocturnalStalker

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I prefer cutting them to let out the impurity of their former ways before meeting me. It is shedding the skin.

Just kidding, I'm not psychotic. Yeah, a collar is hot on girls.

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 4:08:21 PM

manonabike

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You need one to hang that little barrel of brandy from it.

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 7:02:46 PM

WyldHrt

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quote:

You need one to hang that little barrel of brandy from it.

Best. answer. ever.

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 8:37:34 PM

Arpig

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I started a thread on this topic a week or so ago. The end result of what I learned was this: It matters because it matters to those involved. And that's good enough for me.

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 8:49:42 PM

hausboy

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I wore a collar for many, many years....long before I knew what it meant (gimme a break, I was in high school...) All I knew at the time was that I love wearing it, it made me feel secure and it did get quite a bit of attention. I took it off to shower & sleep, but I had my own little daily ritual of how I put it on each morning, and took it off each night. I wore it all through college (where I learned what it meant--my Domme never required it, I chose to wear it)--and continued to wear it every single day until I was 27. The fire service would not permit any type of "jewelry" and it was just a short time later I transitioned, and my collar no longer fit around my neck.

Here's the interesting thing to me, Ghita. I wore that collar every day. Yet I was never more aware of my collar than the day I removed it. Not wearing my collar made me more conscious of my collar's presence than I ever was of it when it was around my neck. Today, even though I continue to serve as a domestic servant, I am un-collared. I look forward to that day when I will again have that security around my neck--but what's more important to me than the leather or chain itself, is the sense of security from having someone at the other end of it.

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RE: Why does a collar matter? - 3/30/2011 8:58:12 PM

ResidentSadist

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig
I started a thread on this topic a week or so ago. The end result of what I learned was this: It matters because it matters to those involved. And that's good enough for me.

I dunno' . . . I'm thinking that a little barrel of brandy hanging from it is pretty universally important!

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