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Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 3:16:38 PM   
jon1979


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When meeting someone for the first time from an online source, and not the local community, how can you know that person will not cry rape or battery? Is there a worry for this? I tend to be very careful, and want to cross my ts and dot my eyes before I meet someone from this website.
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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 3:20:24 PM   
BonesFromAsh


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I don't see how this could happen if, like me, you meet in public for coffee. That's pretty much it for a first meet for me.

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 3:42:12 PM   
YoungBlondeSlave


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quote:

ORIGINAL: BonesFromAsh

I don't see how this could happen if, like me, you meet in public for coffee. That's pretty much it for a first meet for me.



THIS

If it's a first meet if it's more than just coffee or dinner I think you're anticipating too much. Go slow the first few times to gauge chemistry in person. Sometimes the chemistry online is quite different offline.

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 4:12:37 PM   
littlewonder


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How do I know? By getting to know him over time and building a relatinoship with him.

If you're talking about casual play...I got nothing. You take your chances.



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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 4:26:49 PM   
VaguelyCurious


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quote:

ORIGINAL: jon1979

When meeting someone for the first time from an online source, and not the local community, how can you know that person will not cry rape or battery?

...don't fuck or batter them.

Simples.

It's a risk, it's always a risk (and you're kidding yourself if you think the 'community' mitigates that). The severity of the risk depends on the level of crazy of the person you're dealing with. Don't play with people whose level of crazy you don't trust yourself to gauge.


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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 4:51:48 PM   
LadyPact


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If you're looking for a guarantee, I can't help you.  Somebody having next morning remorse is always a possibility.  One of the very reasons that you want to know who you're dealing with.

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 4:57:53 PM   
lizi


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quote:

ORIGINAL: jon1979

When meeting someone for the first time from an online source, and not the local community, how can you know that person will not cry rape or battery? Is there a worry for this? I tend to be very careful, and want to cross my ts and dot my eyes before I meet someone from this website.


There is no guarantee to guard against this and yes, you should be worried. So as the others suggested meet someone in public where there are witnesses. Say hello and goodbye to her where there are people around. If she cried rape or battery after that no one would believe her. You are always taking a chance when you move to a private location kink or no kink.

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 5:12:26 PM   
ladynlord


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jon,
"T" crossing and "i" dotting are very important. So first, get past the fantasy of a fuckfest spanksession within 15 minutes of meeting face to face. (Not saying it IS your fantasy, but it is a common one.)
Second, take to heart the advice of meeting in public for coffee or dinner, taking the time to get to know your partner, and like pact said, learn "who you're dealing with".
Third, limit your first encounter to something less intense...i.e. no marks, bruises, cuts, etc. and perhaps less sexual in nature.
Finally, if possible, it would not hurt to be seen together after your "session" at a place that is well lit, quiet, and even frequented by friends. If your partner is smiling, happy, glowing, or just pleasantly chatting with you, it would go a LONG way to avoiding buyer's remorse the next day that suddenly become accusations! Use the time as a way to find out what your partner did or did not like about the session.

BUT, like coaches will tell you, the only 100% safe way to not get hurt is to stay out of the game!

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 6:18:33 PM   
peppermint


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I have to agree with the others.  Meet in a public place.  Don't plan on playing at the first meet.  Get to know each other.  Same as for meeting and dating in the vanilla world.  You take your chances. 

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 6:37:21 PM   
DesFIP


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The same as anyone else you date. You date, you get to know each other as people. You talk a lot, about your real life, not just about sex. Become friends. Just because you like kinky sex doesn't change what's needed to build a healthy relationship.

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 7:34:32 PM   
DarkSteven


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The possibility she would call rape would be the same as if you met someone from a nonkinky site.

Before I meet someone, I try to get an idea of what kind of submissive she is, what makes her tick.


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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 7:48:28 PM   
porcelaine


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quote:

ORIGINAL: jon1979

When meeting someone for the first time from an online source, and not the local community, how can you know that person will not cry rape or battery? Is there a worry for this? I tend to be very careful, and want to cross my ts and dot my eyes before I meet someone from this website.


Greetings,

You have a couple of options. You can listen to your loins, play roulette and hope all goes well. Or spend a little time getting acquainted and exercise a bit of due diligence in the process. If you elect to get slap happy during the meet and greet you have no one to blame if things go belly up. As others have indicated there's no guarantee, but the slogan buyer beware exists for a reason. Know the product before you take it home err hotel.

Namaste,

~porcelaine


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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/14/2011 10:32:01 PM   
SailingBum


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I never rape or beat a bitch on our first date... its a rule I have.

BadOne

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/15/2011 5:26:53 AM   
ChatteParfaitt


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You are about 15 miles outside of Cleveland. last I heard, Cleveland had a number of public dungeons and a swanky swingers club. I'm sure you can find a munch in your area.

If you don't trust your gut for someone you met online, take them to a munch for a first meet, and get other's input. Or take them to a dungeon for the play until you have a good handle on who they are.






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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/15/2011 7:44:27 AM   
sunshinemiss


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

I never rape or beat a bitch on our first date... its a rule I have.

BadOne







On which date do you succumb to that?

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/15/2011 7:54:55 AM   
strangedesire


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quote:

ORIGINAL: jon1979

When meeting someone for the first time from an online source, and not the local community, how can you know that person will not cry rape or battery?


You don't, any more than they don't know that you won't tie them up and mutilate them. This is a risky game for everyone.


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On that other site as Exegesis.

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/15/2011 7:56:38 AM   
thishereboi


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How did you know the first girl you ever slept with wouldn't call rape afterward? Did you worry about it? What precautions did you take to make sure your t's were crossed and your i's dotted?

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/15/2011 8:53:54 AM   
ResidentSadist


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They do cry rape.
I leave out the dozens I saw happen in the music industry and the adult entertainment industry.  Performers are often targets of rape (and paternity) charges.  The following 3 examples I am personally familiar with ended badly for women who faked rape.  Two stories are about women and bad serial abuse of the "women's state" biased laws until the women themselves were eventually caught.  The other example is one that cost my friend 12 years of his life in prison on a false charge and the bitch who filed false charges got paid (ex girlfriend turned coke fiend) .



Orlando Florida:
She said, "he tied me up then he fucked me." 
He said, "she asked me to tie her up and fuck her. It was her rape fantasy." 
My friend was arrested and had to put up his house for bond.

By the time the case went to Florida court, the female had been incarcerated and resided at the state funny farm.  Apparently, she had been abusing the legal system and after she inspired several other arrests for rape, they locked her up in the loony hatch.  The prosecutor eventually dropped charges but originally wanted a conviction with no jail time, just probation. 

Florida is a "womans' state".  A woman can have a man locked up and held for 22 hours by claiming assault of any kind.  They will arrest him without charges or any evidence of a crime.  They call it a "cool down" period to prevent domestic violence. 


(the names have been changed to protect the innocent)

In Detroit, there was a guy we will call Hollis for the sake of this story.  He was a small time drug dealer.  A girl claimed to police that he was a big dope dealer and raped her at gun point.  Police rammed down the front door of Hollis's house and rushed in with dogs and machine guns.  They had a warrant for his arrest which claimed he rape at gun point.  They shredded his place and found a couple joints of weed.  That was all.  No gun, no big stash of drugs.  So they arrested him on two charges.  Possession of user quantities and rape.  They gave the girl thousands of dollars from the Victims of Violent Crimes Fund.

Hollis was so offended at the false charges, he said all the wrong things in court . . . several times.  He even assaulted a bailiff that insisted he sit down while Hollis was in the middle of proclaiming his innocence at an inappropriate moment.  Hollis based his defense on the charge itself . . . which was a bad idea but hey, you gotta' go with what you know.  The charges were that he put a gun to her head and forced her to suck his cock.  Hollis claimed she threatened to cry rape if he didn't give her drugs for free, which he didn't.  He also asserted the charge itself was proof of his innocence because no man would point a gun at his own cock. 

Along comes my friend Eddy, a small time drug dealer in Detroit.  Eddy was charged with rape at gun point (use of a firearm in commission of a felony).  Eddy claimed a girl threatened to cry rape if he didn't give her drugs for free, which he didn't.  An hour later, police raided Eddy's house with dogs and machine guns but found no gun, no big stash of drugs. 

. . . and then the day came when Eddy was telling his story and he crossed paths with Hollis.  Hollis yells out, "what was her name?"  "Mary" comes the reply.  Hollis starts jumping up and down screaming "she got you too - she got you too".  They hauled Hollis out with both hands cuffed to one foot behind his back so he had to hop . . . and yes, this resulted in yet another postponement. 

Eddy was more effective than Hollis and several months later, we learn that Mary had been steadily receiving thousands of dollars at a time from the Victims of Violent Crimes Fund.  She was now considered an informant by the police and getting paid for the warrants her testimony generated.  Turns out many more people than just Eddy and Hollis were jailed on Mary's identical charges of oral rape at gun point and claims they were drug dealers.

I followed the Hollis and Eddy story for 6 months which was how long it took Eddy to get out.  By the time Eddy hit the system, Hollis had been in jail for 3 months.  So Hollis had 9 months in jail and was still in there when Eddy left.  I do not know what became of Hollis. 


Detroit Suburbs
True story - acquitted after being in prison for 12 years on a false rape charge
My friend Jeffery Moldowan's story

In short, Jeff dumps girl because she becomes a dope fiend.  She is at his house and in a confrontation, he slaps her face.  She is furious and files charges.  Jeff pleads guilty to the face slap. 

Later, the dope fiend ex is on 8 mile rd, probably selling her ass to pay for dope.  She gets kidnapped (white van) and these transvestites shove a pipe up her ass, tearing her up.  The 4 transvestites and their white van are wanted by Detroit Police for running a robbery ring.  Dressed like girls, they lure john's in, beat them and rob them.  In my opinion, the dumb ass dope fiend was probably standing on their corner and got beat down for it.  

Anyway, pissed off dope fiend girl says her ex Jeff and 3 other guys did it at 2am.  Problem was, detectives learned Jeff and 2 other guys had a solid alibi for that time.  So the prosecutor "amended" the time of the attack so they could charge Jeff.  Problem was . . . 2 other guys now had a solid alibi for that time.  The prosecutor proceeded anyway charging 2 of the alledged 4.   I mean hey, did 4 guys do it or did 2 guys do it??? What the fuck? 

According to Jeff, he said pissed off dope fiend girl got $25,000.00 from the . . . wait for it . . . here it comes . . . yes, the Victims of Violent Crimes Fund. 

So the Detroit Police know who the real rapists' are and the MO for the 4 transvestites and their white van.  They  ask the warren police to drop the charges so they could pick them up.  Warren police refused and the sidebar was that they were gonna' keep Jeff because he was a suspected pot dealer. 

Since Jeffery has been release, he filed a law suit against the city et all.  Then he was harassed, getting stopped in traffic over 15 times by local police.


The point . . . be vewy, vewy careful with newcomers in your life.  The suggestions to make first play dates in public dungeons is a good one.  It is something I practiced often . . . even for fly in dates.  We went to a party/munch/public-dungeon straight away where my friends would be present.  That makes for lots of witnesses and corroborative testimony. 

I can see it if I ever catch a court case "why yes your honor, ResidentSadist did stick 90 needles in her tits, cut a bloody corset shape in her back, shove a sharp knife up her cunt and fuck her in the ass using her own blood as lubricant" . . . "but he did it in a loving way and she liked it, I swear."

< Message edited by ResidentSadist -- 4/15/2011 8:55:49 AM >


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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/15/2011 9:00:17 AM   
Phoenixpower


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Simple, get to know them as people first...and start a relationship on getting to know the person instead of looking to get laid...

And as others said, its perfectly ok to meet in public places for a while to get to know the person better

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RE: Live meet ups from online encounters - 4/15/2011 9:06:58 AM   
RedMagic1


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One of your best posts, ResidentSadist.  And that's a high standard.

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Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

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