taking the next step

taking the next step (Full Version)

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totallycaptive39 -> taking the next step (5/9/2006 3:57:21 PM)
i have not been in the lifestyle for very long....less than a year...i am submissive but have been conversing with a Master seeking a slave...i am struggling.although i know what i feel inside of me.....can i fully give up all rights? Can anyone give me any insight in how they came to know they were ready to make that step. thank-you

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 4:17:26 PM)
A) When you aren't asking that question anymore B) When you can clearly see the next five years of your life in the position you are commiting yourself to Why the need to rush from step A to step Y?

CrappyDom -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 4:18:36 PM)
If you haven't lived with a dominant in some sort of D/s relationship, trying to start with something extreme is doomed to failure. Yes there are 17 people here who pulled it off and are living happily ever after, but most of those relationships are a year or two old. How many nights have you spent in bed with this man? Would you consider him if you wanted a vanilla relationship? How many BDSM partners have you had?

mixielicous -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 4:37:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross A) When you aren't asking that question anymore i have to agree with this. as long as there is doubt in your mind, you are not ready. you will know when a man comes along whom you want to serve and worship for the rest of your life, there will be no more questions, just need, desire, and urge to submit completely. [:)]

mixielicous -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 4:39:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CrappyDom If you haven't lived with a dominant in some sort of D/s relationship, trying to start with something extreme is doomed to failure. Yes there are 17 people here who pulled it off and are living happily ever after, but most of those relationships are a year or two old. this is my situation, and our relationship has yet to prove the test of time. i feel though there is kind of an upper hand with us beginning as Nilla, because we evolved together, and i wasnt jumping into a mans arms who knew what he was doing, while i was in the dark by myself.

littleone35 -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 4:48:12 PM)
Well being a slave is a huge step. Might i suggest starting as a submissive and seeing how that goes. Now i may be totally off base but i think that is a starting place. As a slave if things do not go well it is harder to walk away. A submissive can say i am sorry this is not working for me and leave, a slave cannot really say that. I wish you much luck in your search. Matt's littleone

sweetbbwsub31 -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 4:55:54 PM)
Please don't be in a hurry. Take your time. Enjoy being a sub. Some day, when you are ready, you will know it. Some aren't ever ready to be a slave. Be true to yourself and follow how you feel. Good luck, sub tara

totallycaptive39 -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 5:12:14 PM)
thank you all for your replies....i am willing to meet and see where this goes.......like someone mentioned i will know when i meet Him if i am willing to completely surrender.

fastlane -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 5:13:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mixielicous quote: ORIGINAL: CrappyDom If you haven't lived with a dominant in some sort of D/s relationship, trying to start with something extreme is doomed to failure. Yes there are 17 people here who pulled it off and are living happily ever after, but most of those relationships are a year or two old. this is my situation, and our relationship has yet to prove the test of time. i feel though there is kind of an upper hand with us beginning as Nilla, because we evolved together, and i wasnt jumping into a mans arms who knew what he was doing, while i was in the dark by myself. Great post Mix but the man's arms you did jump it to should consider himself LUCKY! winks and lashes, Kevin

catize -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 5:54:35 PM)
I would suggest to you that a year is not enough time to make that decision. In my first year, I met two dominant men. One wanted a slave and told me I would make a great slave. The other wanted a submissive and told me that he didn't think I would be a good slave. What I learned from that is there are dominants who will try to make you into what they want; but you have to know what you want and are capable of providing. I would encourage you to take more time to learn about your submissive self.

unquenchable -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 6:52:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross A) When you aren't asking that question anymore I also agree with this. You will know when you are ready to make that commitment..don't hurry your journey just try to enjoy it. un-------

babysburnin -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 6:54:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: totallycaptive39 thank you all for your replies....i am willing to meet and see where this goes.......like someone mentioned i will know when i meet Him if i am willing to completely surrender. You haven't even met this man? Girlfriend ... "Snap out of it." You are thinking in fantasy-land and your actions/decisions will have real-life circumstances. You won't know after meeting him once ... That's a romantic and dangerous notion.

slavegirl18666 -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 7:02:28 PM)
It took me 2 years to make the step to real life slavery... And, now i have been a slave for 9 monthes and wouldn't change it for the world, but i mean, this is a "no turning back" kinda choice. Make sure it is what you want before you make that step, it just wouldn't be smart to put yourself into that if you didn't know what it was about. I'm not talking about book fantasy life either, i mean real life, because trust me, there is a MAJOR difference. Good luck in any choices you make.

ShivaTS -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 7:22:41 PM)
As a slave in training I had the desire to be owned before meeting my Master. I worry for you if you are being told you must submit to being a slave. Take it slow and at YOUR pace. Being submissive is good enough for some and they have no desire to become a slave. Infact they would be very unhappy being a slave. I hope you make the right choice for yourself and sanity,

mixielicous -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 7:33:11 PM)
thank you [:)]

mixielicous -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 7:37:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slavegirl18666 this is a "no turning back" kinda choice. [/color] not in every situation. actually, i find few people around here who actually make the "lifetime" commitment - for real. i know that personally, O/our contract states: "This I, _______________________, do entreat, with lucidity and the realization of what this means, both stated and implied, in the conviction that this offer will be understood in the spirit of faith, caring, esteem and devotion in which it is given. Should either of us find that our aspirations are not being well served by this agreement, find this commitment too burdensome, or for any other reason wish to cancel, either may do so by verbal notification to the other, in keeping with the consensual nature of this agreement. We both understand that cancellation means a cessation of the control stated and implied within this agreement, not a termination of our relationship as friends and lovers. Upon cancellation, each of us agrees to offer to the other his or her reasons and to assess our new needs and situation openly and lovingly. This agreement shall serve as the basis for an extension of our relationship, committed to in the spirit of loving and consensual dominance and submission with the intention of furthering self-awareness and exploration, promoting health and happiness, and improving both our lives." both being beginners, this was so important. we couldnt set ourselves up for destruction b/c we had a loving relationship and a sour M/s would be no reason to let that go.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 7:39:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: babysburnin You won't know after meeting him once ... That's a romantic and dangerous notion. Sigh I doubt this is one that we will win.

Lordandmaster -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 7:42:55 PM)
There is something very creepy about LA's new avatar.

slavegirl18666 -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 7:43:02 PM)
Mixie, you are very right, and i guess i should have been more understanding of everyones situation being different. In my situation, it's a "no turning back" situation, but everyone is different.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: taking the next step (5/9/2006 7:45:33 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster There is something very creepy about LA's new avatar. ROFL. I continue to protest that my online discussion style is completely the same as my actual personality and thus the bunny is completely accurate. Of course my local partner (who calls me bunny) said it's just because I haven't found a shark avatar yet. But then there's always angryalien.com who did Jaws with bunny ears... I'm still debating on keeping the peep or not, but it's nice that it gets noticed.

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