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Something I probably shouldn't share - 4/27/2011 10:54:37 AM   
NiceGuyNihilist


Posts: 194
Joined: 3/25/2011
Status: offline 		Once I worked with a legal Peruvian immigrant who hated, above anything else, to be mistaken for an illegal Mexican one. His English was poor, and he frequently produced malapropisms that put me in stitches. On his last day of work, in a spirit of jocular friendship, I wrote something unseemly in his farewell card. Minutes after he'd been presented with it, he came storming up to me, shaking the card angrily, and said, "How can you do this? This is my WELFARE CARD!"

< Message edited by NiceGuyNihilist -- 4/27/2011 10:55:18 AM >
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RE: Something I probably shouldn't share - 4/27/2011 12:41:03 PM   
Hillwilliam


Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline 		I worked with a Nicaraguan guy who was one of the best crystallographer/inorganic geochemists I have ever known but he had some doozies.

My favorite one was on the eve of a 2 day federal inspection. Someone asked if he was nervous about the inspection.

His reply "Hey, don't worry about it, I'm as calm as lettuce"

Another one he came up with was "I'm running around like a chicken with his legs cut off"

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Kinkier than a cheap garden hose.

Whoever said "Religion is the opiate of the masses" never heard Right Wing talk radio.

Don't blame me, I voted for Gary Johnson.

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RE: Something I probably shouldn't share - 4/27/2011 12:55:13 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		Okay, I have to ask: How calm IS lettuce?

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RE: Something I probably shouldn't share - 4/27/2011 1:53:25 PM   
Hillwilliam


Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Okay, I have to ask: How calm IS lettuce?



I THINK he was trying to say "cool as a cucumber"

_____________________________

Kinkier than a cheap garden hose.

Whoever said "Religion is the opiate of the masses" never heard Right Wing talk radio.

Don't blame me, I voted for Gary Johnson.

(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)
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RE: Something I probably shouldn't share - 4/27/2011 1:55:30 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Okay, I have to ask: How calm IS lettuce?


You ever seen one shooting up the area on the nightly news, or seen one on Cops, all drunk and beating his cabbage bitch? 

Yeah, didn't think so.....

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Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


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RE: Something I probably shouldn't share - 4/27/2011 1:58:31 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		You guys are funny.

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RE: Something I probably shouldn't share - 4/27/2011 6:33:39 PM   
Muttling


Posts: 1612
Joined: 9/30/2007
Status: offline 		I worked with an Indian who had been a construction manager in the U.S. for over 10 years.    The funniest thing you will ever hear is someone cuss with an Indian accent.  We used to get him worked up just to hear him say "fucking asshole."

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RE: Something I probably shouldn't share - 4/27/2011 6:36:14 PM   
Hillwilliam


Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Muttling

I worked with an Indian who had been a construction manager in the U.S. for over 10 years.    The funniest thing you will ever hear is someone cuss with an Indian accent.  We used to get him worked up just to hear him say "fucking asshole."

Even funnier is to hear a Frenchman say "you sheeeting bastaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaards"

_____________________________

Kinkier than a cheap garden hose.

Whoever said "Religion is the opiate of the masses" never heard Right Wing talk radio.

Don't blame me, I voted for Gary Johnson.

(in reply to Muttling)
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RE: Something I probably shouldn't share - 4/27/2011 10:04:18 PM   
SexyBossyBBW


Posts: 1693
Joined: 2/25/2010
Status: offline 		I had a persistent caller, not born in the US, asking me to go out, or "get with him." Someone who is a friend to me, and the family, and with whom I play around (words only).

So one day, after 2 calls from him, I tell him "you're a persistent Muthah phucker." He got so horribly offended.
Try explaining to a friend, you don't really mean to offend, that Mo Fo, doesn't really mean he.... I don't think I'll ever use that phrase again. M

_____________________________

"..touching was and still is and always will be the True Revolution" Nikki Giovanni
"Only when there are many people who are pools of peace, silence, understanding, will war disappear." -Osho

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RE: Something I probably shouldn't share - 4/28/2011 3:55:33 AM   
Muttling


Posts: 1612
Joined: 9/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SexyBossyBBW

Try explaining to a friend, you don't really mean to offend, that Mo Fo, doesn't really mean he.... I don't think I'll ever use that phrase again. M



I always took pride in being called a mo fo.    Since I have a kid, it would seem obvious to me that I fucked a mother at some point along the way.

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