sub guys limits (Full Version)

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mancslave2 -> sub guys limits (4/29/2011 5:45:12 AM)

ok new question, probably been done before.
generally guys, what are your limits when being dominated?
stuff you think isnt ok or just doesnt feel right for the time if youre meeting just to be dominated for an hour or so.
if prompted by a domme prior to meeting, what things would you request she doesnt involve during the session with her?



BonesFromAsh -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 5:50:58 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: mancslave2

ok new question, probably been done before.


Well, if you had read the Administrative Announcements thread like I suggested in your other post, you would have come across this little piece of wisdom...
Often, your questions can be answered by doing a search of the archives.

Did you?

[:D]



mancslave2 -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 5:56:37 AM)

did a search and didnt bring up any relavent results.
so if you know of a post where people list their limits for comparison then please send me the link



coookie -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 5:59:03 AM)

Your limits are your own. Spend some time doing some research and find out what yours are. I personally (though i am not a submissive male and this would not be because of a first meeting but anyways) have electricity as a limit because my heart is a bit wonky. I have scat limits because ..ewwww. I have blood limits because i believe that my blood belongs in my veins. See how they are all pretty specific to me?



BonesFromAsh -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:00:28 AM)

Your original post mentions nothing regarding comparison. What is a limit for you might not be a limit for someone else...how does comparison come into this?



mancslave2 -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:09:02 AM)

comparison of lists. seeing how many come up again and again on list from people. see which are common ones.
i had chatted to a woman on here claiming she was a genuine domme and would meet people and dominate if paid.
then suddenly flipped out and accused me of being someone else simply because we had similar limits.
surely not that much of a valid point? surely the same stuff is off limits to most people?
hence asking.



BonesFromAsh -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:16:12 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mancslave2

surely the same stuff is off limits to most people?


Surely you realize what happens when you ass-ume things?

Surely you did your own research on the other side of CM by perving similar profiles, yes?

Surely you realize this woman may have chosen to tell you what she did simply in order to not meet.

Surely you realize starting two threads about the same issue can appear a bit obsessive.

Oh, and please...don't call me Shirley. [;)]



mancslave2 -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:32:35 AM)

both threads not about the same stuff. the other is about so called dommes who require a 'tribute' before chatting and are just ripping people off.

this is different. she didnt ask for a 'tribute' just mentioned i would be expect to pay for the time, which is acceptable. but then she just flipped out and claimed i was some other guy, and i didnt get the feeling it was to spare my feelings. i think if she was genuine and wouldnt meet then yeah she would just tell me to fuck off.
im wondering if she is just taking the piss or genuinely does consider im similar to whatever other guy she means.
based on just me saying my limits were
Me:

no blood. no pooh. no violence. nothing public. no pics no vids
no marking no piercing
no pain, within reason. very mild pain ok,. like spanking, torture and beating not ok
She:

ok
well
your secrets out
i know who you are
and dont see why you think i dont
im not stupid
you obv have 2 x collar mes
Me:

nope. just one
mancslave
She:

hmm..........
funny u spell pooh the same as him
and
have the same limits



BonesFromAsh -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:41:10 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mancslave2

both threads not about the same stuff.


Are you sure about that? Look at what you just posted here and look at the post you made on the other thread that mentions a person by name (btw...Did you read the Blacklist thread? Don't be surprised if that post or your entire other thread gets pulled).

Seriously...in the grand scheme of things, does it matter if you have the same interests as another?

Say what you mean and mean what you say.


*ETA....You know, there's the old saying that everyone has a twin somewhere in the world. Oddly enough, you (or at least your screen name) plays into this...minus the #2. [;)]



GreedyTop -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:44:44 AM)

quote:

she didnt ask for a 'tribute' just mentioned i would be expect to pay for the time,


and this is NOT a tribute in what way?


TRIBUTE is not necessarily a BAD thing, despite what you so obviously think.

Tribute can be as simple as opening doors, handing her out of a vehicle, getting her flowers, etc.

broaden your views, grasshopper.



mancslave2 -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:46:22 AM)

thats my point. shes ditching me cos she claims im someone else or she thinks im someone else.
shes basing that entirely on me giving those limits which i suspect are pretty much the same for most guys?
hence asking about it here, i wanna compare my limits to other peoples and see if that list really is so uncommon.
mostly im just pissed off cos she seemed good then she does this.
pisses me off so much with this stuff going on all the time online.



BonesFromAsh -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:48:08 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: mancslave2

pisses me off so much with this stuff going on all the time online.


Then get offline and into real life. Go to a munch and meet people instead of playing at it on the interwebs.



GreedyTop -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:49:11 AM)

LIMITS are individual.


MY limits are not always or completely mesh with those of anybody else of my orientation.

it is ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL subjective. regardless of which side of the kneel (or outside of it) you are.



mnottertail -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:49:57 AM)

Now, see here old chap.  She's a tosser, your a wanker...You're going to find this alot, block, move on and keep playing the cards you have in your hand, sooner or later you are going to win the knickers. 



GreedyTop -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:54:14 AM)

I doubt it.



mancslave2 -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:54:47 AM)

to make the point again, does anyone agree those are a fairly common list of limits? do those crop up often from everyone?
or am i in a minority for specifying those?



thishereboi -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:55:47 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mancslave2

thats my point. shes ditching me cos she claims im someone else or she thinks im someone else.
shes basing that entirely on me giving those limits which i suspect are pretty much the same for most guys?
hence asking about it here, i wanna compare my limits to other peoples and see if that list really is so uncommon.
mostly im just pissed off cos she seemed good then she does this.
pisses me off so much with this stuff going on all the time online.


She mentioned that you both used the word "pooh" and I have to admit it I had two different people writing me and they both spelled it that way, I would wonder. As to the other limits being the same - that doesn't surprise me. Those are common limits. Personally, if she cut off communication based on that one word, I would consider myself lucky and move on to the next one. Maybe try to find some groups in the real world and not rely on the internet so much.



BonesFromAsh -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:56:46 AM)

To make the point again...

quote:

Seriously...in the grand scheme of things, does it matter if you have the same interests as another?


Even if you find 19 out of 20 subs that have the same limits, what does it matter?



GreedyTop -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 6:59:35 AM)

yeah, lotsa complaints like that... but they are almost always complaints by guys that have no plans to get out from behind their computers



LadyPact -> RE: sub guys limits (4/29/2011 7:00:35 AM)

OP, I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt.  While Bones is actually correct that we've had some great past threads where people discussed their various limits, they might be very difficult to find because the keywords that you would have to use to search for them would be so common that they appear in all kinds of threads.  There is some really good stuff in those past threads, but you may have to search for them by paging back, rather than using the search feature.  (Bones is actually better at this than I am on some occasions, so she may be able to recall certain thread titles.)

One quick side note.  I don't think what happened here was to "spare your feelings".  I think you were dealing with someone who wasn't really all that interested in meeting you in person in the first place.  Just My thinking on the matter.

When I first got clip, he had more limits than what he has today.  The stuff that is against TOS are things that are hard limits for both of us, so I'm going to avoid those.  We also had some in common, such as scat, that neither of us have any interest in whatsoever.  When hard limits are the same for both players, I don't find that to be an issue.

The ones that he had as hard limits when I originally got him that were different than Mine were needles, long whips, and vaginal coitus.  The last one was actually the first to go.  Needles came somewhere around the two year mark and long whips went to the wayside somewhere around three years.  (That last one has a lot to do with him spending too much time in war zones and it's the crack that is the problem, not the whip itself.)

To be very honest with you, if I were a bottom, I'd have more things on My hard limit list if we're talking about someone that you are just meeting for some casual play for the first time.  Some things drop off of the list as you go further into a dynamic or you have a long standing casual play arrangement with.



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