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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/9/2011 7:12:28 PM   
mummyman321


Posts: 2102
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Dusseldorf
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan
The spice must flow.  I controlz teh spice, I controlz teh universe.  (Sorry, couldn't resist.)
 
When I play, I like the toys and clothes.  But I don't need them to be fancy.  I love pervertables so I'm just as happy going on a scavenger hunt in the garage as I am with the expensive stuff.  I'm also big on comfort, so I'm more likely to wear jeans and a t-shirt than glossy fetish wear. 
 
For me, it's all very mental.  Picture the mad scientist running experiments - if I do X what reaction will I get?  Or, I want reaction Y, what do I need to do to get it?  It less about the toys and the clothes and more about the reactions I get.  If the spice is the most expedient method for getting what I want, then I'll use it.  If not, I won't.


I loved the movie Dune btw!

Agreed, the Spice does not have to be fancy. It can be any item taken out of its normal use for additional sensory input. It doesn't have to be a pair of leather boots. It could be gym shoes and bobbie socks. It could be the wooden spoon out of the kitchen drawer. I like the mad scientist analogy. The real key as you stated is the mental aspect. The Spice are mere tidbits to drive the mind in different directions.

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Life - Its not about where you are but about the journey to get there - I prefer to choose the road less traveled

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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/9/2011 7:14:49 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		No spice please. Sensory overload isn't pleasurable to me. Mind fucks cause panic attacks. For me it's the emotional connection with The Man. And sensory deprivation is more likely to elicit a good reaction from me. Bondage, gags, blindfold. If there's music it has to be soft and without vocals. The less other input, the more I can focus on him and what he wants from me.

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Slave to laundry

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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/9/2011 7:43:00 PM   
Buzzzz


Posts: 839
Joined: 11/28/2010
Status: offline 		Toys and gadgets are great, yet they can get distracting. when I play, I now limit myself to 2 or 3 toys and that is it (I leave the other toy bags in the car). I found th at it emcourages me to be creative (use toy different ways etc).

they also can be too much. No toys,, just 2 human beings , is what it is all about.

So, I would classify myself as "in the middle"

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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/9/2011 8:28:39 PM   
hematitan


Posts: 49
Joined: 6/25/2010
Status: offline 		Honestly, it depends on how much "spice" we're talking about. I agree with what some have said about too much ending up being sensory overload (which I suppose could be good if that's what you're going for...). Also, while sometimes I like the look of something, I don't really have a fetish for, say, latex or leather.

But I love toys, or at least some types of toys. They don't have to be fancy.

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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/9/2011 8:28:58 PM   
faithbunny


Posts: 99
Joined: 10/28/2007
Status: offline 		My master is also my fiance, so I'm definitely in the 'that's way too much work' camp. I would feel silly as hell in fetish gear, and we as a couple just aren't that theatrical. With us it's more a $20 Target nightie, robe belts if he wants to tie me up, a hairbrush if he wants to spank me. Courtesy of my last birthday, I am now, however, the proud owner of restraint tape, a leather blindfold, and a very heavy silver collar, so after 10 years, we've dipped a toe in. I suppose if we had the extra cash and the free time to make use of it, we might create dedicated play space where such things would be more at home than in the boring old bedroom where we sleep every night.

~faith

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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/9/2011 9:05:01 PM   
mummyman321


Posts: 2102
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Dusseldorf
Status: offline 		I want to thank everyone who has replied so far. I have enjoyed reading the responses and seeing your pov on both sides of the coin. I like to understand what makes people tick. I look forward to seeing more responses. But for now I am going to call it a night!

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Life - Its not about where you are but about the journey to get there - I prefer to choose the road less traveled

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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/10/2011 5:58:05 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		Toys are fun and all, but the greatest spice remains touch.

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/10/2011 7:45:33 AM   
ownedbyPF


Posts: 126
Joined: 2/18/2010
Status: offline 		Fast reply~

I wanted to chime in since we are 24/7, been living together almost 4 years, and yet, we still use the spice almost all the time. That seems a bit different than what others have said who are 24/7 and i find that interesting. Anyhow, i don't get tied up every night... but there's a cane or whip on my ass everyday. He uses me almost everyday and has a lot of the gadgets... not outfits, but crops, floggers, whips, canes, hood, gag, and so on... sometimes he just uses his hands, sometimes he grabs a nearby chord/wire... he is always doing something different to me so imagination is fully there, the other stuff is what delivers the welts and screams he wants to hear. It isn't all drawn out that often... it isn't like a long process of tying me up etc... most nights he just flips me over, or shoves me down, grabs whatever instrument of torment he wants for the night and sets to work.
s

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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/10/2011 8:43:54 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Definitely a spice person here.  Part of it is that I don't want to do one thing.  I want to do a thousand and one things.  I want to change sensations or inflict different types of pain and get the various reactions to different kinds of stimuli.  I don't just want to see what happens if I take one thing and use it multiple ways.  I want to be able to do that with a number of different things and use them in such a way that the contrast between the sensations plays into the reactions that play a part into it, too.  I love switching things up on people, whether that's a different material type of flogger, different weight, sting or thud, how much of this kind of pain going to last, etc, etc.




_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/10/2011 9:21:12 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Definitely a spice person here.  Part of it is that I don't want to do one thing.  I want to do a thousand and one things.  I want to change sensations or inflict different types of pain and get the various reactions to different kinds of stimuli.  I don't just want to see what happens if I take one thing and use it multiple ways.  I want to be able to do that with a number of different things and use them in such a way that the contrast between the sensations plays into the reactions that play a part into it, too.  I love switching things up on people, whether that's a different material type of flogger, different weight, sting or thud, how much of this kind of pain going to last, etc, etc.





See-I'm gonna vibe off of this in the opposite direction. When I was a kid (Not saying you are a newbie LP, heaven forbid, just sharing my experience) I liked to use every toy in the Bag o'Doom. As I've gotten older I've kinda gone towards a simpler route-I pick out a few things that strike my fancy, then work within them, playing with the million and one variations and nuances each toy can offer.

It's been pretty cool. Instead of rushing from one to another, I've had time to master each item, to find ways to use canes for pleasure as well as pain, to shift within regions of pain/pleasure and that wonderful back and forth, two trains running headlong into each other, need/fear, hope/agony thing going in her head.

I mean I've done epic scenes with only a pair of pliers and a few lengths of rope. Nothing more need be required.

Now, I'm not knocking the use he whole bag crowd-hell, I may be back with you a year or so down the road. This is just where I am at now. :-)

But, after all is said and done, really and truly, the greatest spice is the imagination and the heart. The heart for the connection between, hehehehe, the sufferee and the sufferer and the imagination to play on her emotions, mind and body like a soloist on a violin.


_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/10/2011 9:45:15 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

I loved the movie Dune btw!


If you loved the movie, you MUST read the book! I remember when I saw the movie in the theater, there was a cheat sheet - there's so much left out of the movie (as is always necessary to condense a book to 2 hrs.)

I vote for spice too!


(in reply to mummyman321)
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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/10/2011 1:53:21 PM   
mummyman321


Posts: 2102
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Dusseldorf
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
Definitely a spice person here.  Part of it is that I don't want to do one thing.  I want to do a thousand and one things.  I want to change sensations or inflict different types of pain and get the various reactions to different kinds of stimuli.  I don't just want to see what happens if I take one thing and use it multiple ways.  I want to be able to do that with a number of different things and use them in such a way that the contrast between the sensations plays into the reactions that play a part into it, too.  I love switching things up on people, whether that's a different material type of flogger, different weight, sting or thud, how much of this kind of pain going to last, etc, etc.



LP,
I get the switching things up to see the different reactions from the sub. One of my jobs at work is Design of Experiments. Testing what we call the corners of the box. Try every combination to see where your limits are. I think you would make a good Engineer! But I am also curious is it a visual, tactle an auditory stimulus to you? You mentioned the differnet material of the flogger, the different weight and whether it make sting or a thud. While these will all be sensory inputs to the submissive you also experience them from the other end as well.

_____________________________

Life - Its not about where you are but about the journey to get there - I prefer to choose the road less traveled

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/10/2011 2:06:21 PM   
mummyman321


Posts: 2102
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Dusseldorf
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Definitely a spice person here.  Part of it is that I don't want to do one thing.  I want to do a thousand and one things.  I want to change sensations or inflict different types of pain and get the various reactions to different kinds of stimuli.  I don't just want to see what happens if I take one thing and use it multiple ways.  I want to be able to do that with a number of different things and use them in such a way that the contrast between the sensations plays into the reactions that play a part into it, too.  I love switching things up on people, whether that's a different material type of flogger, different weight, sting or thud, how much of this kind of pain going to last, etc, etc.





See-I'm gonna vibe off of this in the opposite direction. When I was a kid (Not saying you are a newbie LP, heaven forbid, just sharing my experience) I liked to use every toy in the Bag o'Doom. As I've gotten older I've kinda gone towards a simpler route-I pick out a few things that strike my fancy, then work within them, playing with the million and one variations and nuances each toy can offer.

It's been pretty cool. Instead of rushing from one to another, I've had time to master each item, to find ways to use canes for pleasure as well as pain, to shift within regions of pain/pleasure and that wonderful back and forth, two trains running headlong into each other, need/fear, hope/agony thing going in her head.

I mean I've done epic scenes with only a pair of pliers and a few lengths of rope. Nothing more need be required.

Now, I'm not knocking the use he whole bag crowd-hell, I may be back with you a year or so down the road. This is just where I am at now. :-)

But, after all is said and done, really and truly, the greatest spice is the imagination and the heart. The heart for the connection between, hehehehe, the sufferee and the sufferer and the imagination to play on her emotions, mind and body like a soloist on a violin.



Kana,
The Spice I mentioned for me lead to Sensory Overload. I like my limits pushed to the point I not longer have full control over my mind or body. Sensory Overload is one why to push my mind and body past that point. You mentioned being able to do an epic scenes with some simple tools. I have experienced Sensory Overload this way as well. Take a simple flogger, rope and leather wrist and angle cuffs. A slow methodic working of the body. Working the whole body but keep coming back to key areas again and again. Alternate the pain with please, a soft touch here, a whisper there. And after a few hours it become very hard to tell the pleasure from the pain. I see this as Sensory Overload too just in a different context without the toys.

But the key here, and as others have mentioned, is the very mental aspect of it. The imagination is what drives it. Just remember there are 2 imaginations in play :)

_____________________________

Life - Its not about where you are but about the journey to get there - I prefer to choose the road less traveled

(in reply to Kana)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/10/2011 2:12:13 PM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline 		fr

it all depends on mood and place really. i never was one for toys and dressing up, but since meeting this guy it's anything goes.

strangely i had a conversation today at work with 4 other ladies and mentioned the pics i have had at any one time of myself on my phone. they looked at me gone out and asked why, well to send to the guy as a bit of sauce for the day. their reaction was to ask why the hell i'd want to do that. i was a little shocked by the reaction until i remembered that 3 years ago i would probably have thought the same. depending on the person and places depends on the inspiration of different thinking and wants. this man inspires me to want everything.

needles

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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/10/2011 2:25:14 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mummyman321
LP,
I get the switching things up to see the different reactions from the sub. One of my jobs at work is Design of Experiments. Testing what we call the corners of the box. Try every combination to see where your limits are. I think you would make a good Engineer! But I am also curious is it a visual, tactle an auditory stimulus to you? You mentioned the differnet material of the flogger, the different weight and whether it make sting or a thud. While these will all be sensory inputs to the submissive you also experience them from the other end as well.

More than any other occupation, I tend to get engineers attracted to Me and it might just have something to do with your thought process above.  Even on a friendship basis, I mesh with them very well. 

Yes, the factors are different on My end, too.  In a slightly different way.  Weight, texture, and the sounds that the toys themselves make (dealing with impact instruments) are part of the whole.  The way the falls strike and how quickly they are landing. 

When I'm at a certain point of top space, all of these things are amplified.  I'm hyper focused on everything that is happening in My little world.  I may not have a clue of how much time is passing or what people might be doing behind Me, but I know from the sound of the falls hitting the skin if they landed an inch too close for the effect I wanted out of the swing.  That's coming from somebody who will usually tell you that her hearing sucks.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to mummyman321)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/11/2011 8:45:29 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		Comments:
This:
"I have experienced Sensory Overload this way as well. Take a simple flogger, rope and leather wrist and angle cuffs. A slow methodic working of the body. Working the whole body but keep coming back to key areas again and again. Alternate the pain with please, a soft touch here, a whisper there. And after a few hours it become very hard to tell the pleasure from the pain. I see this as Sensory Overload too just in a different context without the toys"

Is exactly what I was referring to in this, with or w/o toys:
"To shift within regions of pain/pleasure and that wonderful back and forth, two trains running headlong into each other, need/fear, hope/agony thing going in her head"

And finally, the fantastic LP completely captured the way I feel in topspace with this:
"Yes, the factors are different on My end, too.  In a slightly different way.  Weight, texture, and the sounds that the toys themselves make (dealing with impact instruments) are part of the whole.  The way the falls strike and how quickly they are landing. 

When I'm at a certain point of top space, all of these things are amplified.  I'm hyper focused on everything that is happening in My little world.  I may not have a clue of how much time is passing or what people might be doing behind Me, but I know from the sound of the falls hitting the skin if they landed an inch too close for the effect I wanted out of the swing."


_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/11/2011 10:23:14 AM   
paulmcuk


Posts: 80
Joined: 4/16/2011
Status: offline 		While I enjoy all the "spice" as much as the next sub, I do find that it introduces an element of unreality. The essence of submission, for me, is that it is part of everyday life in an everyday setting wearing everyday clothes. A dungeon is more of a fantasy setting. I guess, like with food, spice is nice to add sometimes, but you don't want it all over everything you eat.

(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/11/2011 11:30:10 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		I like spice, but I think you can spice up almost everything with the right frame of mind and some fantasy and "accessorize"...

Though I do draw the line at camping, that is a hard limit...

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RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/11/2011 12:15:38 PM   
submitting4U


Posts: 64
Joined: 8/16/2010
Status: offline 		Spice for me is the Domina's sensuality and her ablility to seduce and control me ... seduction can be realized through her assertiveness and not necessarily sensualilty. While "toys" are fun, they can interupt the flow or energy stream between partners. Toys shouldn't invade or distract from the D/s relationship. For example, if a dominant women is controlling me and if she clumsily fumbles the whips, ropes, handcuffs, etc ... it kills the heretofore arousal she already had invoked ... So, staying focused on the mental aspect and keeping it simple goes a long way for me. Suffice to say, I am more aroused in relationship than by object (the fetish) per se, so others will feel differently.

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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Spice or No Spice??? - 5/11/2011 3:36:34 PM   
Aynne88


Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

Toys are fun and all, but the greatest spice remains touch.



Yes. I don't need a single toy or accroutement. I need his huge hands around my throat, a firm slap, or even a yank of my hair when he growls he is going to "hurt me." I hate seeing these posed photos of Doms with 50 toys spread out on their bed....it's so "Hey look what I can do!" No thanks. I like pain, and I like feeling at his hands. Too many gadgets and toys irritate me. Planning a scene would ruin all the spontanaity for me, and it makes me feel foolish like I am choregraphing what should come so primally I guess. Dressing up, well, I usually wear pretty sexy underthings anyway, so that's not an issue.

He is my spice, what we do together is the key to this, not what we use to do it with. Him and a room, that's it. I'm all set with that.

_____________________________

As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)



(in reply to Kana)
Profile   Post #: 40
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