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First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 1:07:55 PM

falccon

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When you approach a Domme, what are some good questions to ask?

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 1:23:55 PM

ChatteParfaitt

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quote:

ORIGINAL: falccon

When you approach a Domme, what are some good questions to ask?

I would approach a domme as you would *any* female you were interested in.

Check the FAQ's thread at the top of this forum section, it has tons of great information.

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 1:31:54 PM

LadyConstanze

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

quote:

ORIGINAL: falccon

When you approach a Domme, what are some good questions to ask?

I would approach a domme as you would *any* female you were interested in.

Check the FAQ's thread at the top of this forum section, it has tons of great information.

Yup, we don't tell them about the secret handshake just yet....

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There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 1:56:19 PM

falccon

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much appreciated. thank you.

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 2:02:59 PM

Hillwilliam

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Why dont you try "Hello, my name is ______________. How are you this evening?"

Make sure you smile and look into her EYES not her TITS.

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 2:07:21 PM

gothikbutterfly

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I have to agree Hillwilliam....a man who looks directly at the chest and not into the eyes is obviously out for something OTHER than what he is actually looking for lol.

Eye contact is a must. It shows you have enough confidence in yourself and who you are as a sub/slave/Dom/Domme/Master/Mistress etc.

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 2:35:28 PM

LadyPact

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"How are you?" Definitely a good one.

OP, what would you ask anybody else if you were trying to engage in casual conversation? It's not like Dominant women are strange aliens from another planet.

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 2:41:14 PM

gothikbutterfly

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You could always say what I say when aproaching a higher authority. "Good ______. Hope all is well". (I left it blank because it really depends on what time of day you meet said Domme).

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 2:44:25 PM

Killerangel

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"Hello, I am ____." "How are you enjoying your summer?" "Do you have any special plans for a vacation in the upcoming months or perhaps a long weekend? Where will you be going?" "Have you tried the new restaurant downtown that opened last month yet? I thought it was overpriced but I loved what they did with seasonal ingredients." "Have you read any good books lately? I just finished ___ by ____ and found it a bit on the dry side." "Do you have any pets? What are their names?" "Have you seen the new movie yet with ____? It was very exciting, I couldn't believe what they did with special effects."

Dommes are people, approach them like people. Be interesting, courteous, and friendly. Be someone she'd like to chat with. Do not ask her about kink, tell her about yours, or ask if she'll do A, B, or C to you. Do not offer to show her a cock or a butthole picture. Do not go into a long, rambling, description of what a wonderful and devoted submissive you are. Do not call her Mistress, Goddess, Ruler of the World, or CuteyPieHoneyBunch until you ask what she would like you to call her. In short, act as though you are at a party meeting a woman for the first time and making polite, interested, conversation with her

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 3:58:56 PM

Rochsub2009

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

It's not like Dominant women are strange aliens from another planet.

I see that you're still denying your Kryptonian heritage.

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 4:08:59 PM

LadyPact

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Shhhh. I'm mild mannered Claire Kent. Nobody knows any different when I wear a pair of eyeglasses.

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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 4:17:53 PM

falccon

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thanks to all who replied. once i get past the small talk, what specific questions do i ask to see if we are compatible?

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 4:31:56 PM

BonesFromAsh

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I'd like to share a wonderful story by AAkasha that was posted in the Creative Writings forum.... The Bitch in High Heels

Have a read through and see if that gives you a general feeling as to how many dominant women like to be approached. Once you're able to realize that the important part of the equation, generally, isn't so much the dominant as much as it is the woman part, it should become clearer.

As for specific compatibility questions...I would suggest not being in such a rush to "get past" the small talk. Remember...the devil is in the details and sometimes those details are dropped as subtle hints in not-so-small talk.

< Message edited by BonesFromAsh -- 5/11/2011 4:35:02 PM >

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 4:32:19 PM

MistressDarkArt

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She's the Domme. After you get acquainted (small talk as you put it) why not let her ask the questions? IF something develops from there and she expresses an interest in pursuing the D/s bdsm aspect of you, you could ask her if she'd like you to fill out a comprehensive checklist. After looking that over, she should be able to tell you if you are compatible with her needs.

PS: Listen to BonesFromAsh...she knows what she's talking about here!

< Message edited by MistressDarkArt -- 5/11/2011 4:52:11 PM >

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 4:47:14 PM

RedMagic1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: falccon

thanks to all who replied. once i get past the small talk, what specific questions do i ask to see if we are compatible?

"Why did your last relationship end?"

The way she answers tells me 90% of what I need to know about potential compatibility.

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Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 4:47:38 PM

mummyman321

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Shhhh. I'm mild mannered Claire Kent. Nobody knows any different when I wear a pair of eyeglasses.

Where is a piece of red kyptonite when you want it?

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Life - Its not about where you are but about the journey to get there - I prefer to choose the road less traveled

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 4:55:16 PM

Politesub53

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quote:

ORIGINAL: gothikbutterfly

I have to agree Hillwilliam....a man who looks directly at the chest and not into the eyes is obviously out for something OTHER than what he is actually looking for lol.

Hey.....he may just be a lot shorter than you.

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 5:06:03 PM

falccon

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BonesFromAsh

I'd like to share a wonderful story by AAkasha that was posted in the Creative Writings forum.... The Bitch in High Heels

Have a read through and see if that gives you a general feeling as to how many dominant women like to be approached. Once you're able to realize that the important part of the equation, generally, isn't so much the dominant as much as it is the woman part, it should become clearer.

As for specific compatibility questions...I would suggest not being in such a rush to "get past" the small talk. Remember...the devil is in the details and sometimes those details are dropped as subtle hints in not-so-small talk.

that was a definite eye-opener, and it should be required reading; i'm glad you presented it to me. if i didn't read that article, i would of messed up my whole approach. i kept looking at them as a Domme first, but it should be as a woman first.

(in reply to BonesFromAsh)

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 5:19:33 PM

LadyPact

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quote:

ORIGINAL: falccon

thanks to all who replied. once i get past the small talk, what specific questions do i ask to see if we are compatible?

Dude, you are forty-eight years old. What kinds of questions about compatibility did you ask women in your dating life before the kink part came along?

The world is pretty vast. If you reduce it all down to "what kind of kinks do you like," you're going to sell yourself (and the person you're dealing with) short.

When you dated vanilla, were you in some big kind of rush to ask what kind of sex a woman liked? Was your first conversation about how she likes her relationships structured? Did you say, "hi nice to meet you..... How many children do you plan to have?"

Of course you didn't. You were meeting a person, not planning a relationship from the word go. The rest of that stuff fell into place as you were getting to know each other. That's how you determined compatibility. You can always talk about the kink once you get to know her as a person. She'll appreciate you for it.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to falccon)

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RE: First time questions for Domme - 5/11/2011 5:36:02 PM

BonesFromAsh

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quote:

ORIGINAL: falccon
i kept looking at them as a Domme first, but it should be as a woman first.

By jove, I think you might be getting it!

Now, how would you approach a woman you were interested in?

You might find this interesting also... "Courting a Dominant Woman" by Laura Goodwin
While I find the "degrees" thingy interesting (to say the least), you'll see the same idea of woman first/domme later coming into play.

Good luck and keep reading. Also, get thee to a munch!

(in reply to falccon)

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