RE: Man? (Full Version)

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TemptingNviceSub -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 6:30:28 PM)

As someone has said in a earlier posting..I bas my thoughts of what a man should be upon my Fathers role..A man who is honorable,loving ,caring,protective,a hard worker,teacher of wisdom,with a bit of the mischevious little boy that peeks out at times and made all of us crack up when we saw it,one who puts his family first and foremost above his own needs.....be well..tempting




LaTigresse -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 6:44:52 PM)

I agree that many of the qualities I listed I also strive for myself. However there are differences in men and women that are ideal. In a woman there is a certain femininity, a softness, awareness of herself and the world around her, of her own feminine power that would not be very attractive in a man. The same holds true for the reverse, qualities that are attractive in a man's nature that I would not wish to see in a woman. The differences makes neither more or less than the other, only special in their own right.




slavejali -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 6:45:54 PM)

so true LaTigresse..[:)]




akisha -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 7:42:49 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

As someone has said in a earlier posting..I base my thoughts of what a man should be upon my Fathers role..A man who is honorable,loving ,caring,protective,a hard worker,teacher of wisdom,with a bit of the mischevious little boy that peeks out at times and made all of us crack up when we saw it,one who puts his family first and foremost above his own needs.....be well..tempting


LOL ok this would NOT be a good measuring stick for some of us.




UtopianRanger -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 8:09:26 PM)

quote:


Above and beyond genitalia? 

An Adam's Apple.


HAR! You can say that again. If they don't have one, they're in a hellva lota trouble. [;)]


 - R




BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 8:30:03 PM)

quote:

Most people think there are certain trait’s a male of the species needs to have over and above simply having the correct set of genitalia. What do you think makes a man?
When I speak of a man, not loosely defined as being born with a penis, I mean the he possesses the following qualities: integrity (in appearance, and congruent words/actions), hard working, reasonable smarts, honor, ability to respect all (stronger/weaker), gallant, serious, gracious with his strength unless the situation calls for different.   M




ladychatterley -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 8:40:16 PM)

I don't know the answer, but Lorenz Hart had some good questions on the topic:

What is a man?
Is he a stimulant, good for the heart, bad for the nerves?
Nature's mistake since the world begun.
What makes me give?
What makes me live?
What is this thing called man?




TemptingNviceSub -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 8:46:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: akisha

quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

As someone has said in a earlier posting..I base my thoughts of what a man should be upon my Fathers role..A man who is honorable,loving ,caring,protective,a hard worker,teacher of wisdom,with a bit of the mischevious little boy that peeks out at times and made all of us crack up when we saw it,one who puts his family first and foremost above his own needs.....be well..tempting


LOL ok this would NOT be a good measuring stick for some of us.
..LOL..and I thought about that as I was posting..however it was a question about what makes a man...not...what makes a Dominant..then I would have to tweek so to speak on my thoughts in that arena...be well...tempting




DelightMachine -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 9:13:12 PM)

I think when we talk about someone being "a man" when we're NOT talking about whether or not that person has a penis, we're talking about that person accepting responsibility and being strong, especially in the big things.

The biggest things probably all have to do with character -- but especially anything that calls for courage, discipline, fortitude. Those are the aspects of morality and character that deal with being able to do things despite your lower emotions (fear, desire, laziness).  

Real men are also protective of those who are physically weaker than themselves.

You didn't exactly ask this, but it's related: I think whenever we talk about masculiinity we're referring to something that deals with strength in some form (physical, emotional, etc.). Our ideal of someone who is feminine always seems to have something to do with sensitivity (physical and emotional, especially). I think anyone needs to have both strength and sensitivity, but we're more concerned about strength in men and sensitivity in women.

This seems to reflect the fact that the vast majority of men are physically stronger than the vast majority of women and that men and women tend to think differently -- most men seemt to separate their thinking selves more from their feeling selves. If that sounds confusing its because I don't have a very clear idea about it, I just think that last statement is something pretty close to the truth.

I like the Maryland motto. I think it's in Latin, but translated it means "Manly deeds, womanly words." I think that's a recognition that we all need to be something more than just masculine or feminine -- we need the best both, and each one of us individually needs something more (including, as a matter of fact, manly words and womanly deeds). 




MistressLove999 -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 9:15:40 PM)

One can only respect a Man who loves his child so much. Congrats to you and I am sure he will grow up to be a fine MAN with your love beside him.





Sab -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 11:51:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Padriag

Rudyard Kipling wrote the best answer to that question I've ever come across.

If
by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream and not make dreams your master;
If you can think and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build them up with worn out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute,
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth, and everything that's in it,
And, which is more, you'll be a Man my son!




[;)]




NeedToUseYou -> RE: Man? (5/11/2006 11:58:18 PM)

The primary difference between a man and a boy. Is a man is sure of what he wants, his moral character is set, and he's comfortable with who he his. He knows what is important to him, and works towards that end. A boy simply doesn't know who he is yet, or what he wants. So, it breaks down to conviction in purpose. 




Kedikat -> RE: Man? (5/12/2006 12:06:18 AM)

A male or female should be adaptable to the situation at hand, and smart enough to change as it changes.
Specialization is for ants.
Genitalia does make the gender. Human beings of every type can be equipped with either set.
Be your best. Then you are a decent human being.




meatcleaver -> RE: Man? (5/12/2006 1:06:50 AM)

The belief in the wisdom of authority is the wisdom of fools and that holds true if you are the authority figure. Wisdom is reflective and a wise person is practical and adaptable.

It seems to me, women have a romantic attachment to the archetypal hero, the character that struts through a Hollywood film. It is fantasy and if they do exist, they are tools that serve other men and fight in wars that shouldn't be fought. They think that protecting their home is attacking someone elses but they really do believe they are protecting themselves and fail to see their crimes.

As a culture we have long since left behind the need to protect the homestead of wild animals or bands of raiders from other villages. Modern life is political and if you aren' t a political creature you won't succeed. The moment you start seeing the world in black and white and fail to see it is full of moral dilemas you are onto a loser. Integrity is just a word and anyone can make it fit themselves, it is meaningless even if you have a base line on which you measure it because someone elses baseline might be entirely different and view you has having none. The archetypal hero, if he ever existed is a museum exhibit, he is stuffed or he is putting himself in danger because he is not wise enough to question stupid people he thinks are wiser than him.




NeedToUseYou -> RE: Man? (5/12/2006 2:04:51 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kedikat

A male or female should be adaptable to the situation at hand, and smart enough to change as it changes.
Specialization is for ants.
Genitalia does make the gender. Human beings of every type can be equipped with either set.
Be your best. Then you are a decent human being.



It looks like you are set in your beliefs, there.




slaveofdarkhold -> RE: Man? (5/12/2006 2:16:04 AM)

Some brilliant answers in this thread, thanks MstrTiger for starting it. I don't think I can add much that hasn't already been covered. It did make me think of this quote though (it's from the muppets, please don't hold that against me)

'If you need to know the measure of a man, you simply count his friends'

I think that's spot on. Whatever qualities we might decide defines a man, it's certainly true that a good man will win the friendship, or at least the respect, of those around him.
The same can be said of women of course...




agirl -> RE: Man? (5/12/2006 2:23:02 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Padriag

Rudyard Kipling wrote the best answer to that question I've ever come across.

If
by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

etc.......



This is one of my favourite poems Padraig....but I think it's applicable to all humankind, not just men.  Those characteristics would be fine things in a female too.

Regards, agirl




agirl -> RE: Man? (5/12/2006 2:42:12 AM)

........and when it comes down to it, what makes a man, for me, IS merely the fact that he is a man. The physical differences, physical strength, genitals. In terms of characteristics, I can't think of any that I'd see as purely male or *making a man* that wouldn't sit well on a female.

Regards, agirl




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Man? (5/12/2006 6:17:37 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali
I really enjoy the differences between the male species and the female species....I don't want us to be the same (lifts her skirt for the feminists in the audience to spank me) lol


I actually agree.  I think feminism took a wrong turn in the 80s by masculinizing things in order to compete- in order to get the "male jobs" we "acted male" we "dressed male"- essentially we played by the male's rule in order to find our power as women in the new era.

I can UNDERSTAND why they did what they did, and certainly some measure of progress was made...but not in the long term.  We need to find our power in ourselves based on our OWN sense of rules- not playing by anothers. 

Now you've got women constantly conflicted over what they really want and males completely at a loss because women are either too scared to let someone else help them for fear of appearing weak or try to be superwoman. 

I think we should celebrate who we are on our own terms- and this includes males who act/have personality that is stereotypically female and vice versa. 




Dollbecky -> RE: Man? (5/12/2006 6:41:58 AM)

On one hand if you live as a male you are a man if you mean what makes the type of man I respect and hope other males model themselves on....(bits kiped from the insightful LaTigresse)
Strength of character
intelligent
honest
admits his mistakes and moves on
gentle with those that need it
knows how to give and recieve love
Not afraid to work
These are all good  things but the measure of a good man .....how he parents his children...
Very early on, I saw my Beloved tend to his baby sister after a scraped knee...thats when I knew he was not just any male ....[:)].





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