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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/12/2006 8:57:21 PM

theRose4U

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quote:

That really pissed me off, because I'd already addressed that issue and his bringing it up again told me he wasn't listening the first time.

You're shocked by this how exactly? Seems to be a continuing theme.

(in reply to Evanesce)

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/12/2006 9:01:12 PM

Wulfchyld

Posts: 2618
Joined: 12/7/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix

folder titled "potential stalker".

*wonders who is filed in "L"*

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Submission is not a gift... it is plunder!
Where there is a whip, there is a way!
Dom/mes of a feather, beat the f*ck out of slaves together

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/12/2006 9:27:14 PM

Evanesce

Posts: 2325
Joined: 9/14/2005
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quote:

You're shocked by this how exactly? Seems to be a continuing theme.

Well, yeah, but this was before the pattern was established.

Got another email from him today, telling me all about the town-wide garage sale this weekend and how I'll really find some great things for my house if I just go down there. Not gonna happen.

I did take y'all's advice, though. I've moved all his emails into a folder under his name, and I'm simply going to ignore him from now on.

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Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/12/2006 11:45:36 PM

LadyHugs

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Dear Evanesce, Ladies and Gentlemen;

I agree with keeping a folder on unwanted solicitations by anybody. It needs to be said that men are not the only ones who stalk and can't take no for an answer. There is a female that is a "problem" but, for now it has been handled by a few seasoned dominants and a police officer that is in the scene.

With anybody who keeps on pushing, making excuses it is a manipulation to keep you engaged. Even if it is responding to an email. It is fishing for weakness. Enticing to met here or there, is another manipulation as well. Off your turf, you're at the mercy of your survival mode and not wise. To suggest having friends come with you will thwart most cases however, this chap has wanted to engage you both into a dialog.

Good advice was given, to create a folder. Keep the evidence, log the conversations, make copies of the E-mails as well. You just never know what this chap is up to. I would also put your premise on special attention/patrols, saying there has been a date that can't accept a 'no' for an answer. If local, some officers will go to this chap and give him a direct message to stay away, logging it on their files.

Respectfully submitted,
Lady Hugs

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/14/2006 4:56:08 PM

NikkiAnn

Posts: 64
Joined: 5/7/2006
From: Redford, MI (near Detroit)
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Mistress Denise,
I ask you to please look at my profile, I don't know if I am the type of person you are looking for , but I do have many of the qualities you are seeking. My needs are pretty small compared to what I may offer to someone such as yourself. Thank You so much for looking.

Submissively Yours,
Nikki Ann-

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LOVE as though you have never been hurt before,
SING as though no one can hear you,
LIVE as though heaven is on earth.--Souza

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/14/2006 7:12:47 PM

OKCmalesub

Posts: 3
Joined: 5/14/2006
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I am new to this site , and am a sub male that respects others right to pick and choose .
I have read your delima.
From what you discribed any talk from You (pro or con) only excites him more
Which means you need to be out of the picture and a third party intervine to shatter his dream world he has mantifested
But above all do not assume anything
Let the police handle it
Good luck

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/14/2006 7:15:14 PM

Evanesce

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Check your mail, Nikki.

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Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/14/2006 7:24:49 PM

OKCmalesub

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I got to ask how he contacted you in first place ? here ?
do you find it some strange he lives around the block?
Not to scare you , but I am guessing he has been stalking you far longer than you may realize

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/14/2006 7:29:24 PM

Evanesce

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No, he hasn't. And to the best of my knowledge, he's not on this site. We met via that other site. The one I "forget" to visit any more, in spite of having paid whatever it was to have our ad there. Strange that he lives 10 minutes from me? Not really. Interesting concidence, though, that he was "trained" by someone I know well, whose slave gave me a great deal of insight into how this individual operated when I contacted her to see if my impressions of him were consistent with their experiences. They were.

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Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/14/2006 7:41:11 PM

OKCmalesub

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well I have read alot of good advice for you about this , as for me I am still trying to figure how I got a ice cream cone beside my name ha

(in reply to Evanesce)

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/14/2006 8:13:28 PM

ladylexington

Posts: 117
Joined: 6/7/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

Simply put: Even the negative responses are providing him wank material.

MisPandora is right. Every response, even responses that we would consider negative gives him a fix. Because he lives so close to you, the situation is more complicated than blocking an e-mail. I'd recommend that you read "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin DeBecker. It is an excellent book on stalking behavior that offers some very hands on advice about how to deal with these personalities. Best of luck.

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/25/2006 9:34:31 AM

Evanesce

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OK, so it's been a couple more weeks, and I've not had any contact with this guy at all. Not from my end, anyway. He's emailed me several times in the interim, with the latest having arrived today. In it, he talks about how this weekend is the perfect time for him to begin his service to us, and that he's even available to spend the night if we want.

This guy just doesn't get it! What part of "We're not interested" does he not understand???

On top of that, we don't just start someone "in service" to us without spending a great deal of time getting acquainted first. Compatibility is important to us, and there is none here!

Pushy bottoms really piss me off.

[Mod Note: email deleted. Please don't paste email into forum posts]
:: edited because the Mod deleted the email ::

< Message edited by Evanesce -- 5/25/2006 10:15:36 AM >

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Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/25/2006 9:49:29 AM

sublace

Posts: 201
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Begging is just crazy, especially after you have already said no. Whats so hard to understand? I would love to be serving someone too, but I'm not going to sit and beg. No matter how bad I would want to serve someone, if they don't want me thats it. The guy needs to get a clue.

sublace

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/29/2006 1:52:52 PM

Mlicious

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Having your Master respond to any further contact from this guy was exactly what I was going to suggest. His persistence further affirms your reasons for not taking him in. I would agree that he has stalker qualitites that you do not want to feed. Imagine how much of your energy and time he would soak up if you did have him around. He does not want the situation with you and your Master, he just wants the attention from you. I bet you do not hear from him much after he hears "no" from another male. Good luck.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Evanesce

I tend to view it as stalking as well, although I really don't feel I'm in any danger from this particular individual. He asked for permission to come to my house, which was, of course, denied. I believe he'll respect that. That, and I've got an 80-lb Rottweiler who loves to growl and bark insanely (like she's going to rip their throat out) at anyone who comes to the door (and at the traffic light at the corner, and the people in the church next door, and the trash can in the living room). He's not met her and doesn't know she's a big baby.

What I've decided to do is to have Master respond to him and tell him exactly what I've told him. I think, perhaps, hearing from the person who does have the ultimate authority in the household might cool him off. Unfortunately, Master won't be home for another week.

< Message edited by Mlicious -- 5/29/2006 1:56:28 PM >

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/29/2006 7:08:25 PM

theRose4U

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I had this happen a few weeks back from someone on another thread making an arse of themselves bragging about money and models. He insisted that he could "keep me in the life I'd like to become accustomed", if I would come to the mountains to own him as his work doesn't allow relocation. Wow never thought my life or career was that bad, but an applying sub that's never met me would know best right?

Anyway I remark on his apparent similarity to another profile and ask how it is that the pictures are identical. He replies it's a profile that was demanded by his pro-domme so that he can send his journal and tribute. [cough] When I ask why he's contacting me if he already has a domme he states that he needs someone more local to "fit his needs". A week goes by before I get all 5 profiles blocked and he gets the idea that no means no.

(in reply to Mlicious)

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/30/2006 7:32:04 AM

iliv2servher

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Enough already! Unless you like the drama. It's a soap opera. The sooner you block this guy the better. I'm worried that you might be setting yourself up for a real-life stalker. And don't assume he isn't reading your posts here either. I'd add him to your blocking list and contact CM just as a precaution.

Good luck.

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RE: Begging to Serve - 5/30/2006 2:42:35 PM

Mlicious

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That is good advice. I once had a stalker issue, unrelated to the lifestyle though. When I was ready to take further action, I was advised by police that in order to pursue stalking charges, I would have to wait for him to contact me again (dont call him), and give him notice that any other contact would result in your making a report and obtaining a PPO (Personal Protection Order or Restraining Order). I did just that. When he called, I gave him notice and threw in many expletives. The fool called again after that, and then I had the basis for a police report and a PPO. Fortunately, his calls ended with his receipt of the PPO and I did not have to pursue charges. While you may not want to speak to him at all, you strengthen your position by giving notice. Good luck.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix

I agree with some of the advice you've been given, but I take a slightly different approach when it's verging on stalking. I ignore, but I do not block/delete messages. In fact, I keep all messages neatly tucked away in a little folder titled "potential stalker". But I don't respond to any of them. It can back up your story if it ever does reach the point of police involvement (which it normally doesn't as stalkers *need* that feedback, good or bad, and if you don't provide it, they move on).

If I were to send any kind of final message to him it would be this "We have made ourselves clear that we don't desire relations with you. Please end all communication with us immediately. Anything after this point will be considered harrassment/stalking, and we will take the appropriate action. Good luck on your search."

< Message edited by Mlicious -- 5/30/2006 2:44:45 PM >

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