Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset.


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 12:43:12 PM   
LikesEmYoungNHng


Posts: 68
Joined: 5/24/2011
From: In My Place
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1


quote:

ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng

my thoughts exactly, im not into incest.

You are acting as though you are willing to consider it.


OH LORD NOT AT ALL. I DIDNT MEAN TO COME ACROSS LIKE THAT.

_____________________________

"No woman truly knows what she is, until she has worn a collar."- author unknown

"Only a life lived in the service to others is worth living."-Albert Einstein

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 12:45:01 PM   
LinnaeaBorealis


Posts: 8595
Joined: 10/5/2008
From: Insanity & beyond
Status: offline 		I have had to live in other people's homes for the last couple of years. Nobody has ever pushed me into doing anything in those homes that I felt was wrong to do. You need to not just state your boundaries, but make sure that others adhere to them. If that means losing this relationship, so be it. That will just free you up to meet the right one for you.

I agree about meeting potentials at munches. This is what I am requiring now & it's working great!! So far, not a one of the ones who have contacted me have come to a munch. This says to me that it's weeding out the idiots just fine!!!

_____________________________

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in
~~L. Cohen

Just one of the yahoo's

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 12:46:57 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Solution to your problem.

Shut off the PC and the phone.

It won't be an issue again.

By the way, if this is the biggest "problem" in your life, consider yourself lucky.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to LinnaeaBorealis)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 12:47:02 PM   
LikesEmYoungNHng


Posts: 68
Joined: 5/24/2011
From: In My Place
Status: offline 		THANKS!! everyone. the feedback is wonderful

_____________________________

"No woman truly knows what she is, until she has worn a collar."- author unknown

"Only a life lived in the service to others is worth living."-Albert Einstein

(in reply to LinnaeaBorealis)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 12:47:43 PM   
Phoenixpower


Posts: 8098
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsLadySue

It sounds more like you exist for him to get his rocks off over the phone listening to you cum. 


What she said. You really should consider to move on, considering you haven't met him in person so far...there are folks out there who try to use others free of charge to avoid paying for phone sex....not saying that he is one of them, but there is a potential that he is one of them, considering you haven't met him yet to form a genuine bond.

quote:

By the way, if this is the biggest "problem" in your life, consider yourself lucky.


Very well said

< Message edited by Phoenixpower -- 5/29/2011 12:49:45 PM >

_____________________________

RIP 08-09-07

The PAST is history, the FUTURE a mystery, NOW is a gift - that's why it's called the PRESENT

www.butyoudontlooksick.com/navigation/BYDLS-TheSpoonTheory.pdf

(in reply to MsLadySue)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 12:48:33 PM   
LikesEmYoungNHng


Posts: 68
Joined: 5/24/2011
From: In My Place
Status: offline 		touche ladypact.

_____________________________

"No woman truly knows what she is, until she has worn a collar."- author unknown

"Only a life lived in the service to others is worth living."-Albert Einstein

(in reply to LikesEmYoungNHng)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 12:51:30 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng


quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1


quote:

ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng

my thoughts exactly, im not into incest.

You are acting as though you are willing to consider it.


OH LORD NOT AT ALL. I DIDNT MEAN TO COME ACROSS LIKE THAT.

Then why do you have doubts or concerns about saying no? I realize he is the last man with a phone on the planet earth, but if we were living in an alternate universe where other guys have phones too, don't you think some guy would back off if you said no?

Something about what you are doing is making this guy hear "maybe." Type caps lock at him, not just me.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to LikesEmYoungNHng)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 12:58:19 PM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng


quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself

You tell him that it's not possible while at home, and explain why.

If you can find somewhere else you CAN do it, then let him know in advance.

If he continues to push it, then maybe it's time for some hard thinking on your part.


i have told him time and again, yet he's always telling me that i am not TRYING hard enough. i even started to cry and took a pic and sent it to him to help him...

i guess i could go in the car and drive to a secluded area and help him but when he wants it now he gets so frustrated.

i do want to please him. but maybe i need someone more open to communicate and a bit more understanding.........



How old is he?

_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert


This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to LikesEmYoungNHng)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 12:59:25 PM   
LikesEmYoungNHng


Posts: 68
Joined: 5/24/2011
From: In My Place
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1


quote:

ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng


quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1


quote:

ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng

my thoughts exactly, im not into incest.

You are acting as though you are willing to consider it.


OH LORD NOT AT ALL. I DIDNT MEAN TO COME ACROSS LIKE THAT.

Then why do you have doubts or concerns about saying no? I realize he is the last man with a phone on the planet earth, but if we were living in an alternate universe where other guys have phones too, don't you think some guy would back off if you said no?

Something about what you are doing is making this guy hear "maybe." Type caps lock at him, not just me.


thank you, i just did, called him and he said i didnt listen and he wants me but wants me to listen and learn, and i told him this is new, we both have to listen and learn...but hes not having it. at all. so i will serve better to someone more suited to me.

_____________________________

"No woman truly knows what she is, until she has worn a collar."- author unknown

"Only a life lived in the service to others is worth living."-Albert Einstein

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 1:01:08 PM   
LikesEmYoungNHng


Posts: 68
Joined: 5/24/2011
From: In My Place
Status: offline 		30

< Message edited by LikesEmYoungNHng -- 5/29/2011 1:02:15 PM >

_____________________________

"No woman truly knows what she is, until she has worn a collar."- author unknown

"Only a life lived in the service to others is worth living."-Albert Einstein

(in reply to thishereboi)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 1:02:53 PM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline 		usually i agree alot with julia, where i disagree here is where she says you are very young. you are not, you are thirty and asking questions like an 18yr old with no experiance. from what you say of this guy, and so i'm only going by what you say, he sounds like an arse getting his rocks off. if you are looking for a D/s relationship then i don't see a) what he is teaching you b) what you are getting out of this. and c) under consideration for what exactly?

i mean, is this purely an online/phone thing or are you under consideration to live with him? if so why haven't you met already?

i'm sorry to say that at the moment, as harsh as it sounds, it's coming over to me that all you are is wank fodder. he has no respect for your circumstances or the way that makes you feel. i'm all for having my guy pushing my bounderies, but he knows me quite well after nearly three years but he also knows where to stop and that some things are just out of bounds altogether.

you need someone who respects you more than their next hand job.

needles

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 1:07:47 PM   
LikesEmYoungNHng


Posts: 68
Joined: 5/24/2011
From: In My Place
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins

usually i agree alot with julia, where i disagree here is where she says you are very young. you are not, you are thirty and asking questions like an 18yr old with no experiance. from what you say of this guy, and so i'm only going by what you say, he sounds like an arse getting his rocks off. if you are looking for a D/s relationship then i don't see a) what he is teaching you b) what you are getting out of this. and c) under consideration for what exactly?

i mean, is this purely an online/phone thing or are you under consideration to live with him? if so why haven't you met already?

i'm sorry to say that at the moment, as harsh as it sounds, it's coming over to me that all you are is wank fodder. he has no respect for your circumstances or the way that makes you feel. i'm all for having my guy pushing my bounderies, but he knows me quite well after nearly three years but he also knows where to stop and that some things are just out of bounds altogether.

you need someone who respects you more than their next hand job.

needles


i have no experience. i am 30 but am very new, so my questions come from a learning perspective.



_____________________________

"No woman truly knows what she is, until she has worn a collar."- author unknown

"Only a life lived in the service to others is worth living."-Albert Einstein

(in reply to needlesandpins)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 1:09:25 PM   
BonesFromAsh


Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng

30


But you don't know for sure because you've never met him, right?

What do YOU want from a partner? Are you looking for only online/phone interaction?

You say in your profile you want motivation...is that it?


(in reply to LikesEmYoungNHng)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 1:12:30 PM   
LikesEmYoungNHng


Posts: 68
Joined: 5/24/2011
From: In My Place
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BonesFromAsh


quote:

ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng

30


But you don't know for sure because you've never met him, right?

What do YOU want from a partner? Are you looking for only online/phone interaction?

You say in your profile you want motivation...is that it?




someone who makes me feel safe but someone who i can serve.

i a m looking for in person a real connection. not online or the phone.

i expect too much too fast.

_____________________________

"No woman truly knows what she is, until she has worn a collar."- author unknown

"Only a life lived in the service to others is worth living."-Albert Einstein

(in reply to BonesFromAsh)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 1:14:18 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Wait.  You're thirty and living at home?  Do you have a disability?  Did you lose your job in a cutback?  Is there some issue that doesn't allow you to understand mature, human relationships?  Please do tell Me what the problem is that you aren't being a grown adult here.  You'll have to excuse Me, but I am not seeing why a thirty year old woman doesn't have the common sense that God gave a rock to even have to ask this ridiculous crap.


< Message edited by LadyPact -- 5/29/2011 1:16:13 PM >

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to LikesEmYoungNHng)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 1:15:17 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

i have no experience. i am 30 but am very new, so my questions come from a learning perspective.


Your profile says you are 18

Edited to add, I just looked at your profile and I could swear it said 18 about an hour ago

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 5/29/2011 1:16:09 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to LikesEmYoungNHng)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 1:16:37 PM   
BonesFromAsh


Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng

someone who makes me feel safe but someone who i can serve. What does that mean..."someone who I can serve"? Do you have any thoughts on what that is for you? Sexual...non-sexual? Safe in what way? Safe as in someone you trust? That takes time.

i a m looking for in person a real connection. not online or the phone. Then stop playing online games with strangers.

i expect too much too fast. That's the root of the problem right there. Do a search on "sub frenzy".


(in reply to LikesEmYoungNHng)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 1:17:51 PM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng


quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins

usually i agree alot with julia, where i disagree here is where she says you are very young. you are not, you are thirty and asking questions like an 18yr old with no experiance. from what you say of this guy, and so i'm only going by what you say, he sounds like an arse getting his rocks off. if you are looking for a D/s relationship then i don't see a) what he is teaching you b) what you are getting out of this. and c) under consideration for what exactly?

i mean, is this purely an online/phone thing or are you under consideration to live with him? if so why haven't you met already?

i'm sorry to say that at the moment, as harsh as it sounds, it's coming over to me that all you are is wank fodder. he has no respect for your circumstances or the way that makes you feel. i'm all for having my guy pushing my bounderies, but he knows me quite well after nearly three years but he also knows where to stop and that some things are just out of bounds altogether.

you need someone who respects you more than their next hand job.

needles


i have no experience. i am 30 but am very new, so my questions come from a learning perspective.




it makes no difference. being owned does not mean being miserable and doing things you don't want to do. so learn to be strong and only give yourself to someone who deserves it. so far this guy just needs a kick in the cunt to make him listen. at the moment he's only thinking with his cock, most certainly not about your best interests.

there are plenty more where he came from. at the moment he's guilting you into trying to please him. i don't see what you are getting out of that.

ask yourself this; would you do this in a vanilla relationship? if not then why would it be different just because it's D/s? be stronger. tell him there are plenty more where he came from. he's not the only one who will give you what you want. but at the moment you are letting him do what he wants at your expence.

decide exactly what you want, lay it out exactly and if he can't do that then he's not what you want. hge can't turn it on you and say you are being bad. he's the one being bad and showing no respect for your boundaries. tell him that some things are a hard limit and sex on the phone with your family there is one of them. ask him if he would do the same, if he would i'd have serious doubts about him anyway.

needles

(in reply to LikesEmYoungNHng)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 1:17:55 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

usually i agree alot with julia, where i disagree here is where she says you are very young.


My bad, I thought she was VERY young...



_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to needlesandpins)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting u... - 5/29/2011 1:20:43 PM   
LikesEmYoungNHng


Posts: 68
Joined: 5/24/2011
From: In My Place
Status: offline 		so sorry lady pact for being new about this and not knowing.

not everyone was born a bitch.

_____________________________

"No woman truly knows what she is, until she has worn a collar."- author unknown

"Only a life lived in the service to others is worth living."-Albert Einstein

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094