RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset.

RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (Full Version)

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LadyPact -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:25:29 PM)
It has nothing to do with being a bitch. It everything to do with being a competent adult. Christ on a cracker! My kid's twenty-three and if she came to Me with foolishness, I'd ask her if I had failed her in raising her in some way. If she didn't have the comprehension or the strength to know that "no really does mean no" I would wonder where in the fuck I had failed as a parent.

needlesandpins -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:29:33 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng so sorry lady pact for being new about this and not knowing. not everyone was born a bitch. not knowing what? common sence tells you you don't have to do something you don't feel comfortable with no matter how new you are to 'this'. whatever 'this' maybe. if you are talking D/s then it's the same as anything else, you set your store out and if they don't like it you either come to some sort of compromise or it's a hard limit. simple. if you mean you are a total virgin then be very careful as there are alot of guys that will take that and move on. i'm not usually one for lists, but in this case i think you should. make a list of what you want and most certainly what you don't. be very choosy. also, be very careful how you word things in a forum. things can come over differently depending on how a person choses to read it. like your bitch comment, it comes over to me as though you are implying that LP is a bitch. not that LP can't address that herself be that the case. needles

Icarys -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:31:34 PM)
quote: My kid's twenty-three and if she came to Me with foolishness, I'd ask her if I had failed her in raising her in some way. If she didn't have the comprehension or the strength to know that "no really does mean no" I would wonder where in the fuck I had failed as a parent. Not everyone raises their kids like that...unfortunately.

LadyPact -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:31:49 PM)
As the old joke goes....... Being In Total Control Here Damn right.

LikesEmYoungNHng -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:31:56 PM)
no does mean no. wow what an easy concept... really wow i didnt even think about it like that... and i was raped after saying no....... hello open your eyes!! (not you, me) now i see why you werent getting why i didnt get it. i need to take my blinders off. i think all men will love me then i get hurt....

LikesEmYoungNHng -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:34:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Icarys quote: My kid's twenty-three and if she came to Me with foolishness, I'd ask her if I had failed her in raising her in some way. If she didn't have the comprehension or the strength to know that "no really does mean no" I would wonder where in the fuck I had failed as a parent. Not everyone raises their kids like that...unfortunately. sadly this is my case too.

BonesFromAsh -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:35:10 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng no does mean no. wow what an easy concept... really wow i didnt even think about it like that... and i was raped after saying no....... hello open your eyes!! (not you, me) now i see why you werent getting why i didnt get it. i need to take my blinders off. i think all men will love me then i get hurt.... This is all about some guy you've never met who wants you to cry and masturbate while on the phone with him? Really? Edited to add...I'm always amazed at what I read on "adult" sites.

LikesEmYoungNHng -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:36:57 PM)
yes. common sense slapped me in the face.

Kaliko -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:38:33 PM)
Damn. This whole thread feels so....anticlimactic. And confusing.

LadyPact -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:42:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng no does mean no. wow what an easy concept... really wow i didnt even think about it like that... and i was raped after saying no....... hello open your eyes!! (not you, me) now i see why you werent getting why i didnt get it. i need to take my blinders off. i think all men will love me then i get hurt.... Don't pull this shit. You aren't talking about some man who raped you. The question came up regarding some man that you haven't even met in person! If you have unresolved rape issues, go to therapy. Nobody on these boards can fix you so that your past wounds don't encroach on your new relationships. In all seriousness, if there's something wrong in there....... Repair it. Do that for yourself before you get involved with other people. The fact that you want to play the pity card says a lot more about you than it does about Me. If that comment stings a bit, you might want to think about why.

poise -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:44:11 PM)
I'd like to offer you a few training tips, free of charge, and I won't need you to get on the phone and cum for me to know whether you are learning or not. Not every Tom Dom and Harry that writes you on the other side is someone with sincere intentions. Many will see you as fresh bait and try to manipulate you into doing things simply because they say they are a Dominant. You are new here, and I am certain your mailbox is filling up fast. Use this to your benefit, and do not ever feel you are obligated to anyone simply because they show up in your mailbox. You are going to be getting alot of attention you may not be used to getting. Alot of the men on the other side are only interested in sexual gratification. While that in and of itself isn't a bad thing, remember that you have the right to keep it within your boundaries. Be prepared for many to call you fake if you don't perform for them. Or for the very creative "You must do this to prove that you are submissive". As cliche as this sounds, even though you may be submissive, you do get to submit to the man of your choice, in the manner in which you choose. And lastly (I think!) I note that your signature states you are under consideration by a Sir JC. Please feel free to tell him that you were once considering him too, but have since changed your mind. Best of luck to you!

needlesandpins -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:47:30 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact As the old joke goes....... Being In Total Control Here Damn right. quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact Don't pull this shit. You aren't talking about some man who raped you. The question came up regarding some man that you haven't even met in person! If you have unresolved rape issues, go to therapy. Nobody on these boards can fix you so that your past wounds don't encroach on your new relationships. In all seriousness, if there's something wrong in there....... Repair it. Do that for yourself before you get involved with other people. The fact that you want to play the pity card says a lot more about you than it does about Me. If that comment stings a bit, you might want to think about why. likes both! needles

LikesEmYoungNHng -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:48:00 PM)
true, ladypact.

LikesEmYoungNHng -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:50:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: poise I'd like to offer you a few training tips, free of charge, and I won't need you to get on the phone and cum for me to know whether you are learning or not. Not every Tom Dom and Harry that writes you on the other side is someone with sincere intentions. Many will see you as fresh bait and try to manipulate you into doing things simply because they say they are a Dominant. You are new here, and I am certain your mailbox is filling up fast. Use this to your benefit, and do not ever feel you are obligated to anyone simply because they show up in your mailbox. You are going to be getting alot of attention you may not be used to getting. Alot of the men on the other side are only interested in sexual gratification. While that in and of itself isn't a bad thing, remember that you have the right to keep it within your boundaries. Be prepared for many to call you fake if you don't perform for them. Or for the very creative "You must do this to prove that you are submissive". As cliche as this sounds, even though you may be submissive, you do get to submit to the man of your choice, in the manner in which you choose. And lastly (I think!) I note that your signature states you are under consideration by a Sir JC. Please feel free to tell him that you were once considering him too, but have since changed your mind. Best of luck to you! thank you.

angelikaJ -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 1:59:07 PM)
You have mail.

LadyConstanze -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 2:04:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact quote: ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng no does mean no. wow what an easy concept... really wow i didnt even think about it like that... and i was raped after saying no....... hello open your eyes!! (not you, me) now i see why you werent getting why i didnt get it. i need to take my blinders off. i think all men will love me then i get hurt.... Don't pull this shit. You aren't talking about some man who raped you. The question came up regarding some man that you haven't even met in person! If you have unresolved rape issues, go to therapy. Nobody on these boards can fix you so that your past wounds don't encroach on your new relationships. In all seriousness, if there's something wrong in there....... Repair it. Do that for yourself before you get involved with other people. The fact that you want to play the pity card says a lot more about you than it does about Me. If that comment stings a bit, you might want to think about why. LP, while what you have said is true, a person who feels lonely might want to be more prone to falling prey to some idiot who promises what he or she wants to hear. I guess we all have leaned on somebody at one point in time, maybe all she's lacking is a friend who'll give her a hug and tell her what you said, a friendly push in the right direction.

Buzzzz -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 2:06:46 PM)
It is nice to see an OP participating in the discussion. Very "refreshing" .

LadyPact -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 2:30:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze LP, while what you have said is true, a person who feels lonely might want to be more prone to falling prey to some idiot who promises what he or she wants to hear. I guess we all have leaned on somebody at one point in time, maybe all she's lacking is a friend who'll give her a hug and tell her what you said, a friendly push in the right direction. LC, I'm not disagreeing with you here. At the same time, I also think we have to look at whatever it is that is driving us during certain times. Loneliness or other versions of emotional pain can have us making terrible decisions. The OP might get some benefit out of one of those good lessons. "If your best friend came to you with this situation, what would you tell them?"

PhilSlave -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 4:36:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng i live with family and over the phone it is hard for me to please my Teacher. (my Daddy) he wants me to call and cum for him while i cry, but i cant do that living under a roof that is not mine, i must respect my family but how can i do that while i am in training? If he doesn't respect your boundaries he's obviously not for you or what you thought you wanted isn't for you. Decide which it is and make the change.

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: i have stated my boundaries, yet He keeps getting upset. (5/29/2011 4:44:52 PM)
If it was me I'd boot him right out of my life like Monday morning trash. He should be respecting that it's hard for you to masturbate or cry at the drop of the hat while living around family. And someone who gets pushy and impatient when he can't have what he wants, when he wants, is more of a child than a Dom. quote: ORIGINAL: LikesEmYoungNHng [I have told him time and again, yet he's always telling me that i am not TRYING hard enough. i even started to cry and took a pic and sent it to him to help him... i guess i could go in the car and drive to a secluded area and help him but when he wants it now he gets so frustrated. i do want to please him. but maybe i need someone more open to communicate and a bit more understanding.........

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