RE: It IS All About the Sex!

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RE: It IS All About the Sex! - 5/15/2006 12:53:29 PM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
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quote:

Is recognizing sex skills and their importance such a deviation from doctrinal purity that it becomes sufficient grounds for excommunication ?

Let me put it this way. If you come into 'my' church expecting sex, you're going to be disappointed. If you come into 'my' church insisting on sex, yes, you'll be excommunicated.

The thing is.. I don't force people to come worship at my altar and I don't appreciate it if they try to force me to worship at theirs. There are plenty of churches from which to choose, so why would someone walk in some place that won't meet their wants and needs?

Celeste

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RE: It IS All About the Sex! - 5/15/2006 1:37:24 PM

yourMissTress

Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
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quote:

How many feel as we do, that BDSM is as sexual as it is physical

Thank you Mercnbeth for a great topic.

Several posters have touched on different aspects of My feelings on the subject.

Sex is the core of BDSM for Me. I get an enormous sexual thrill from causing and inflicting pain, I even get wet thinking about creating pain in someone. From the first touch on the canvas that I'm about to strike or pierce or wax or whatever, to the initial cries and moans from My victim to the buckling of their knees, I am sexually charged. For My girl and I, our love making is hotter and more primal after a session of pain play.

I usually don't play with people that I don't have some connection with, some chemistry with. But on the occasion that I am playing with someone that I'm not attracted to sexually, I still get a rush of power. Of course My inner sadist gleefully rejoices in screams of agony no matter where they come from, as long as I am causing them.

My girl and I live within the D/s dynamic I am always her Domme, and she is always My sub. Regardless of where we are, who we are with, and what we are wearing. D/s is a constant element in our relationship even though sometimes it is and underlying element. Sometimes when it's secretive and known only to us, that heightens the excitement.

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Post #: 42

RE: It IS All About the Sex! - 5/15/2006 3:28:44 PM

truesub4u

Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: yourMissTress

quote:

How many feel as we do, that BDSM is as sexual as it is physical

Thank you Mercnbeth for a great topic.

Several posters have touched on different aspects of My feelings on the subject.

Sex is the core of BDSM for Me. I get an enormous sexual thrill from causing and inflicting pain, I even get wet thinking about creating pain in someone. From the first touch on the canvas that I'm about to strike or pierce or wax or whatever, to the initial cries and moans from My victim to the buckling of their knees, I am sexually charged. For My girl and I, our love making is hotter and more primal after a session of pain play.

I usually don't play with people that I don't have some connection with, some chemistry with. But on the occasion that I am playing with someone that I'm not attracted to sexually, I still get a rush of power. Of course My inner sadist gleefully rejoices in screams of agony no matter where they come from, as long as I am causing them.

My girl and I live within the D/s dynamic I am always her Domme, and she is always My sub. Regardless of where we are, who we are with, and what we are wearing. D/s is a constant element in our relationship even though sometimes it is and underlying element. Sometimes when it's secretive and known only to us, that heightens the excitement.

Can only smile and agree... but on the other side of this...

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Post #: 43

RE: It IS All About the Sex! - 5/15/2006 6:22:57 PM

kyraofMists

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BDSM is very sexual for me. The more intense and painful the scene, the more sexually aroused I become. Then afterwards when all the happy chemicals start to dissipate from my body, I become incredibly horny. It is part of my sexuality and for me I cannot separate them.

However, I also use play as one way to relieve stress. I find the primal scenes between me and my Lord to be very cathartic. I walk away from them sore of body but also feeling at peace, calm and content.

Knight's kyra

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Post #: 44

RE: It IS All About the Sex! - 5/15/2006 7:05:47 PM

Sinergy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver
I can't imagine having a sub and not indulging sexually. Having her bent over for a good paddling and not being aroused by her reddening butt? Impossible. Why bother if there is no sex involved, I've got better thengs to do. I hate having a woman fussing around me. I can make my own coffee and whatever else I need to do. I cook better than the women in my life too.

Hello A/all,

I forbid both of my submissives to ever enter the kitchen, except to do dishes. I never thought it was possible to burn water, but they proved me wrong in this.

I want a D/s relationship which exists both in the bedroom (as in having sex) and out. Which is not to say I have issues with people who have other forms of relationships, they just are not for me.

Just me, could be wrong, but there ya go.

Sinergy

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Post #: 45

RE: It IS All About the Sex! - 5/15/2006 7:13:31 PM

TemptingNviceSub

Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
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..humm..well personally for me BDSM can be sexual ,it can also be asexual..however in a D/s relationship then BDSM is and must be of a sexual nature, a part of the whole relationship if you will..the key word to me being..RELATIONSHIP...and as someone said..when first meeting with a Dominant in the beginning,I do not mind discussing our BDSM interests ..but if that is the full extent of conversation or the only interest shown then I am usually put off but if it is only a portion of getting to know me the person then my attention is captured....be well..Tempting

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Post #: 46

RE: It IS All About the Sex! - 5/15/2006 7:23:40 PM

MistressSassy66

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Joined: 11/5/2004
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For Myself,Its both.

When I have a Pro session its not sexual,yes I tie up private parts and touch them to torture them,
but the sex factor is not there.I do however realize that once home the submissives may have sexual fantsies and that makes it sexual,but that is in their own head not Mine.

Now in My private M/s life with slave bishop it can be sexual or not.
Most of the time the idea of her being Mine is enough to excite Me.Somedays there is no time to think.
Going about daily business the sexual aspect is not a constant,her being My slave for whatever I want or need is a constant.So for U/us its not about sex.

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Post #: 47

RE: It IS All About the Sex! - 5/16/2006 8:05:18 AM

MrRodgers

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Young lady, you pontificate way too much. The church of kink is a metaphor and in no way made any suggestion as to what you are writing here. Words have meaning expectations or insistence are nowhere in my post. The word force was also not in there so I haven't the slightest idea what you are talking about.

We have the forums it seems because to simply email in the great kinkosphere is, it would seem, always an attempt to get into a subs pants.

Now look at all the possibilities here involving sex...and sex skills and my emphasis on them is still very important to me and anyone I choose to be involved with.

Iam with the others here that reveal that sex can be involved during housework, cookouts, poolside...anywhere..that is in fact part of the kink...isn't it ?

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Post #: 48

RE: It IS All About the Sex! - 5/16/2006 8:14:34 AM

meatcleaver

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A woman shouldn't be let anywhere near the cooking. If I was a more paranoid person and didn't accept it was due to lack of cooking skills, I would say I've been poisoned several times by women who have wanted to please me in the kitchen!

There's only one thing I want to eat when if a woman is providing it and its not mushy pasta.

< Message edited by meatcleaver -- 5/16/2006 8:15:31 AM >

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Post #: 49

RE: It IS All About the Sex! - 5/16/2006 8:47:21 AM

BlkTallFullfig

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quote:

Many threads have been skirting the issue of having sex as part of BDSM, or separating the sexual aspect from the other sensations.

I've seen that, and while it obviously works for some folks, for me personally, it looks like a great movie with a terrible ending if there is no sex at some point before of after, lol.

quote:

What about the opposite? How many feel as we do, that BDSM is as sexual as it is physical.

Count me in.

quote:

What would happen if unattached submissives and dominants indicated that the reason they were pursuing a BDSM relationship was because they found it highly sexually stimulating and arousing?

I'd give him my number/oportunity to invite me for coffee or a drink.

quote:

Would that help or hinder them in their search? Is that type of 'honesty' something to keep hidden until getting to know the other person better? Is this aspect of compatibility a reason that some relationships don't go beyond the initial "getting to know you" period?

I think being honest about who one is, and what one desires can only help in the pursuit of a compatible/symbiotic relationship. Indeed if someone read my profile and somehow missed that sex be part of the equation, we would indeed not be able to get beyond the coffee/drink phase. M

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RE: It IS All About the Sex! - 5/16/2006 11:36:46 AM

talltxsub

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Joined: 11/10/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

quote:

ORIGINAL: Najakcharmer

quote:

ORIGINAL: talltxsub
HURRAY! Finally finding people willing to admit that they love the sex as part of the overall activity.

Problem is, most guys who are contacting women on an adult site seem to be incapable of distinguishing between "Yes, I enjoy sex as part of BDSM activities in the context of an intimate relationship" and "I am willing to have sex with YOU, right now, so send me photos of your penis and a graphically explicit suggestion about what to do with it."

Most normal, healthy human beings do have a sex drive and want to have sex. Those of us who are BDSM oriented may be having our sex in the context of a BDSM relationship. But there are good reasons for not saying "Hey everybody, I LIKE SEX and I WANT TO HAVE SOME SEX" in a profile on an adult site.

Najak,
Your points would be reasons I would want the option of putting sex into the profile checklist were I a woman, regardless if it was a "hard limit" or a "lives for". What better way to eliminate the foreployers and one-handed web surfers who are there anyway? This wouldn't create any more or less of these creatures, but it would make them more identifiable for the purpose of exclusion.

You only see the roaches scatter when you turn on the light. But to get them to congregate in mass in the middle of the room you may have to set out some bait. Only exposed can you determine if they should be eliminated or turned into pets.

That was not really the point of my comments....

It was more the general issue under discussion that for some people, sex is a necessary part of the broader subject. This is more in response those who say it is NEVER part of the subject than those for whom it is a mere ploy to get kinky sex.

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