RE: What Do You Offer... (Full Version)

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leadership527 -> RE: What Do You Offer... (6/27/2011 2:57:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss
And to stay somewhat on topic...



  • I can't cook: I can... or I can hire someone who can better than me.
  • I can't clean: I can... or I can hire someone who can better than me.
  • thank goodness the washing machine does the laundry Yeah, it does it for me too
  • I'm a fair hand at baking: Neat but so is the local bakery

In other words, all that stuff is mostly useless. Can you LOVE me? Can you commit to a relationship? Can you deal with the levels of intimacy that I thrive on? Can you care about someone else more than yourself? Do you have the strength to actually do that when it's hard? Are you a good person? These are the things which matter to me. Oh yeah, and as a passing thought, how do you feel about obeying?

But hey, at a bare minimum, I'm pretty sure you can blow Ron. And given his last post I'm thinking someone had better soon. I'm a bit worried about him.



SailingBum -> RE: What Do You Offer... (6/27/2011 3:02:43 PM)

Ehhhh I guess Im much more fundamental in that I never was lookin on here. But since the OP did ask I have nothing and everything to offer. Take me as I am or walk on by as it really make no difference to me.

BadOne



sunshinemiss -> RE: What Do You Offer... (6/28/2011 5:49:42 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

But hey, at a bare minimum, I'm pretty sure you can blow Ron. And given his last post I'm thinking someone had better soon. I'm a bit worried about him.


I think Ron probably has a passel of pretties that he trots out every night and gets his jollies with and then "woe is me"s himself here as a reaction to keep the channels open for when he has a vacancy...



sunshinemiss -> RE: What Do You Offer... (6/28/2011 6:22:30 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

In other words, all that stuff is mostly useless. Can you LOVE me? Can you commit to a relationship? Can you deal with the levels of intimacy that I thrive on? Can you care about someone else more than yourself? Do you have the strength to actually do that when it's hard? Are you a good person? These are the things which matter to me. Oh yeah, and as a passing thought, how do you feel about obeying?




Your questions remind me of a poem (everything reminds me of a poem I suppose...)
The Invitation
By Oriah Mountain Dreamer
It doesn't interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for,
And if you dare to dream of meeting
Your heart's longing. It doesn't interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool
For love, for your dream,
For the adventure of being alive. It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon.
I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow,
If you have been opened by life's betrayals,
Or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain,
Mine or your own,
Without moving
To hide it or fade it or fix it. I want to know if you can be with joy,
Mine or your own,
If you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes
Without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic,
or to remember the limitations of being human. It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true.
I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself,
If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul.
I want to know if you can be faithless and therefore be trustworthy. I want to know if you can see beauty
Even when it is not pretty every day,
And if you can source your life
From its presence. I want to know if you can live with failure,
Yours and mine,
And still stand on the edge of a lake and shout to the silver of the full moon,
"Yes!" It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair,
Weary and bruised to the bone,
And do what needs to be done for the children. It doesn't interest me who you are, how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand
In the center of the fire with me
And not shrink back. It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied.
I want to know what sustains you
From the inside
When all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone
With yourself,
And if you truly like the company you keep
In the empty moments.



Isambard -> RE: What Do You Offer... (6/28/2011 9:31:48 PM)

Good companionship, a place in the country, and cheap booze.

Oh yeah, and a free hat.



SlaveKelly4life -> RE: What Do You Offer... (7/4/2011 11:46:45 AM)

Besides "kink", I have intelligence, loyalty, determination, commitment, diligence and a natural desire to please.



leadership527 -> RE: What Do You Offer... (7/4/2011 12:07:15 PM)

In short... yeah... yeah to that whole poem. In fact... HELL YEAH!

I almost hate even saying that because that poem is pretty woo-woo for an engineer type such as myself. Did I just lose some engineer street cred in among all my domly street cred losses?

That poem so expresses what I'm looking for in a partner. It is such a different take than the walking embodiments of perfection that frequent this board. I don't want someone who has never lied. I want someone who HAS lied... seriously and hurtfully... and grown from that experience. I want someone who knows their own imperfections and is good with them. That way, there's some hope that they'll be OK with mine. There's also the hope that they won't crumble into ruin the moment they realize they are, in fact, imperfect.

That, I think, needs to go on my profile.



roland23 -> RE: What Do You Offer... (7/5/2011 12:52:25 PM)

What do I have to offer besides BDSM?

Advice. Avoid people who ask questions about what you have to offer!



Flagrante -> RE: What Do You Offer... (7/5/2011 2:30:20 PM)

I disagree with this poem quite strongly.

We all sweat and fart and our mouths smell bad in the morning. We are all who we are, warts and all. Basing esteem on conditions or clauses is out of the window for me because it means that we can only love ourselves if we have successfully navigated some form of rat maze and pressed the right buttons.

You're OK, I'm OK. I value myself knowing that I have faults, imperfections. You value yourself knowing that you have faults and imperfections. We do not value ourselves because of what we earn, what we dress, who we know. We value ourselves because that is the beginning of loving ourselves, forgiving ourselves, accepting our fallibility as part of what we are. And if we cannot love ourselves, forgive ourselves, how can we love other, forgive other?

And if I cannot reach for the moon, or stand silent in fire, or plumb the oceans, that is quite alright by me, because I accept that I am fallible and live quite serenely with myself.

Only in this way, can I value you for yourself, without conditions or restrictions. "I will only love you if you obey me, I will only love you if you meet my expectations, I will only love you if you give me a blow job" What happens if you fail to navigate the rat maze and press the right coloured buttons? Does that mean I fall out of love with you? "Unfortunately Esmeralda, your blow job was only 83% efficient. You must pack your bags and leave my house. I know it is the middle of the night, but you have brought it on yourself"

But if I accept you in your worst moments and you accept me in my worst moments, then we have the ability and support and freedom to be the best that we want to be and not the best that I want you to be or the best that you want me to be.

I see all the restrictions and negative clauses in the profiles.

"I am not looking for.... Short men need not apply.... If you are..., then pass right on by....". Do you really think we have the ability to restrict all the "wrong" people out of our lives and not throw out the baby with the bathwater? Have you heard of the congress of apes? The congress of apes decided to design the future of the ape. Their final specification was hairier body, longer arms, bigger chest, louder voice, bigger dick. Then all the apes were amazed when this naked ape with puny chest, quiet voice and six inch dick took over the world and put them all in zoos.

I see these clauses and I ask myself. Will this person accept me as I am with all my faults and human fallibility? If the answer is no, then I am not welcome for myself.

Sorry if this is a long post. But the reality is that we are all the heroes/heroines of our own stories, and for me, it is far too short a story for this kind of restrictive judgement.

Excuse the length of this post.

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