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The Art of the search - 6/25/2011 3:44:35 PM

DOMaroundNYC

Posts: 1
Joined: 4/26/2006
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Searching for your one on CM is more of an art than a science. Trying to weed out fakes and those who are not truthful is always less than fun. I wonder if the one for each us exists here?

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RE: The Art of the search - 6/25/2011 3:52:08 PM

BurntKitty

Posts: 3340
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: Here To Eternity.
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Patience, grasshopper.... By posting here you've taken your first step to learn about the force... (Never mind, I'm mixing up my philosophers.)
It's taken a few people months if not years to find their mate.

Welcome to the cool side of CM, "the Boards!" Folks here speak their mind, have fun & banter on a daily basis. It's a lot better than the "other side", at least I think so.
Dive in, jump in wade in any way you want to get involved.

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RE: The Art of the search - 6/25/2011 5:40:01 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
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Well, fella, you've been here five years and your profile is pretty good, aside from not having any pics of you. Maybe go to some kink events - NY should have lots of them.

Welcome to collarme.

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RE: The Art of the search - 6/25/2011 5:42:35 PM

hlen5

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Welcome to the boards!

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RE: The Art of the search - 6/26/2011 4:33:06 AM

OohAahMrs

Posts: 7723
Joined: 7/14/2010
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Welcome, hope you can find the one! Hope i can find a couple of dozen!

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RE: The Art of the search - 6/26/2011 5:28:41 AM

ashjor911

Posts: 7793
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: balcony, having a Smoke
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Welcome To CM

PS: Love the Art of Duct Tape

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RE: The Art of the search - 6/27/2011 12:37:17 PM

milfyclass

Posts: 8
Joined: 6/26/2011
From: NY
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Destiny perhaps?

'The Art of the Attraction' might be more apt.

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RE: The Art of the search - 6/27/2011 12:49:09 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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Welcome to CM. At the very least to the posting side of it, since you've been here for five years.

Is there someone for everyone? It's hard to say. I don't know if that's necessarily true for people in general, much less to say that it's an absolute for kinky people on a website. It might entirely come down to the opinion you hold as an optimist or a pessimist.

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RE: The Art of the search - 6/28/2011 4:17:05 PM

tiggerspoohbear

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Welcome to the boards. Good luck in your search.

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RE: The Art of the search - 6/28/2011 4:41:32 PM

ImpishSub89

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Joined: 6/27/2011
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fate definitely plays a hand in it but your actions play a bigger hand

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RE: The Art of the search - 6/29/2011 9:25:53 AM

findingmistress

Posts: 22
Joined: 3/23/2011
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queit agree and quiete disagree..... agree becoz i am here finding a mistress since 2 months and still didnt accompolished.

disagree bcoz i am a true slave if i get owned i will realy serve my dream mistress well.....

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RE: The Art of the search - 6/29/2011 10:13:40 AM

tiggerspoohbear

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quote:

ORIGINAL: findingmistress
queit agree and quiete disagree..... agree becoz i am here finding a mistress since 2 months and still didnt accompolished.

disagree bcoz i am a true slave if i get owned i will realy serve my dream mistress well.....

Can take a whole lot longer to find a mistress, 2 months is nothing.....and "true slave" compared to what? Sorry, the twue card doesn't wash around here, who's real to one might not be for another.

< Message edited by tiggerspoohbear -- 6/29/2011 10:14:27 AM >

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RE: The Art of the search - 7/4/2011 11:45:39 AM

milfyclass

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From: NY
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Perhaps a more mainstream approach is required for those particular 'perfect' other. If there were just more honest and trusting people to reveal that they have a certain kink within a few days of being together (say 72 hours over many months of dating and socializing together). Perhaps like gay men since the 70s in SF and NY, there needs to be a code of sorts. Perhaps either wrist bands or pendants and charms, rather than handkerchiefs/bandannas in certain pockets (remember those?!)

Wish there was greater trust and maturity and respect for values and privacy so we could communicate these ideals/preferences of kinks in real time.

To Admin: how about like mainstream dating sites, more options to search for others by interest? And choosing what we're actually looking for. Me? I'm a novice non-lifestyle Mature Woman looking for a cute boyish genuine YM (18 to 25) interested in certain things. Filter results by those that are interested in Female Supremacy, but not into Lifestyle BDSM etcetera. Can we get a feature to do this?

Anyhow. I find it annoying that people just simply don't take 2 minutes to read the profile before sending a message. And when they do they are 'in scene' rather than just being themself and writing to me as simply a potential friend and woman. Maybe it's just me and those not so seriously into the whole Dominant 24/7 Lifestyle scene, but it's actually offputting when men (especially those older men with weird rude silly names, and overweight) write me with 'Mistress i want to be humiliated and serve you in whatever way you want, everything from foot massages to licking your toilet bowl clean!' Yikes. Not only is it a turn off but a bit over the top and desperate.

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RE: The Art of the search - 7/4/2011 8:50:16 PM

tiggerspoohbear

Posts: 19141
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People choose to be honest or not. And the Admins and Mods certainly have enough to do without having to start to add features here, there and everywhere. It's quite simple really, if the message sent doesn't appeal, there's a delete and block button. Use it as often as you wish, it doesn't cost a thing. The same as this site. I make use of it repeatedly on the other side. If ya don't match up with someone, it's not worth the aggravation or the hassle of corresponding back and forth. Which is nice to find out before you open a cmail by being able to hover over what was sent. Easy peasy.

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RE: The Art of the search - 7/4/2011 8:54:58 PM

Tantriqu

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My beloved Douglas Adams said statistically there are fifteen or sixteen PERFECT mutual matches in the world: you just have to hope they're not all squatting by dungfires in subSaharan Africa [i.e., without WiFi].

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RE: The Art of the search - 7/5/2011 6:31:29 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

welcome..

Dude.. you're in NYC.

just off the first page of an AOL powered search:

TES: http://www.tes.org/
BDSM Orgs from domsubfriends.com: http://www.domsubfriends.com/cgi-local/wwwdir/db.cgi?db=org&uid=default&state=NEW+YORK&view_records=View+Records&ww=
(thats organization, not orgasms, for the usual crew of smartasses *grin*)

Neitherland ( a rather long list of various clubs/events in the NYC area.. you may have to scroll to find what something appropriate): http://www.neitherland.com/hyperballad/clubs/nyc_clubs.shtml

Paddles: http://paddlesnyc.com/

*sigh* I do so miss the original NYC Hellfire (RIP, Lenny)

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