RE: Emotionally Bound (Full Version)

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needlesandpins -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 8:57:09 AM)

i agree with alot of what has been said in here. you love him because you want to, you allow that to continue because you hope he will love you too. well he's had enough time and has repeatedly shown you that he anything but loves you.

we can not tell you how to stop feeling a certain way any more than we can tell you how to win the lottery. it takes a hell of alot of energy to love someone, but here's a thing, you are only 18. what if you had spent nearly half your life with the guy and then he treat you like shit like some of us have gone through? most of us responding are quite alot older than you and have been through it ourselves, which is why you are getting told the same thing.

i'll tell you this; that love you have that takes so much energy to keep up is easy. you want to hate this guy? well for sure it takes an awful lot more energy and time to keep hating someone. the guy is a user, are you really that cheap? that is what you are telling him, that you are easy and cheap. have some self respect because why would he love someone like that? if he's such a twat what makes him worth any of your emotion? how does he earn that from you?

stop looking for someone to love you and love yourself. if you can't do that then why would anyone else?

needles



hlen5 -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 9:05:07 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ariadne2771

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1


This is wonderful advice!



Welcome to the forums, ariadne2771!!



hlen5 -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 9:11:16 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Jaspersky

ok you little trolling jack@ss you can shove your little comment where the sun dont shine got it? i shoulda never posted here i only got one actually helpful responce all the rest were just saying the same thing over and over, and you know what i really dont much care to read anymore of the usless things the people posted here. thanks for 1 actually positive and helpful idea.



You have everyone telling you the same thing. That reminds me of this;

If one person tells you you are a horse, he's crazy. If three people tell you you're a horse, they're delusional. If ten people tell you you're a horse, it's time to buy a saddle. Giddy up, Jaspersky!

You can do this, good luck!!



juliaoceania -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 9:27:48 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Jaspersky

ok you little trolling jack@ss you can shove your little comment where the sun dont shine got it? i shoulda never posted here i only got one actually helpful responce all the rest were just saying the same thing over and over, and you know what i really dont much care to read anymore of the usless things the people posted here. thanks for 1 actually positive and helpful idea.



And instead of being grateful for the one comment you found helpful, you focused on those you did not.

I saw very few responses that were designed to be hurtful, even if they were not saying what it is you wanted to read.

I have started telling people in my real life this, and I will write it down for you... please give me a list of prescreened answers so that I know how you would like me to respond.[8|]



ariadne2771 -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 9:31:35 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: hlen5Welcome to the forums, ariadne2771!!



Thank you, hlen5!



hlen5 -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 9:35:03 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ariadne2771

quote:

ORIGINAL: hlen5Welcome to the forums, ariadne2771!!



Thank you, hlen5!




You're welcome!



ChatteParfaitt -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 9:35:04 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania




And instead of being grateful for the one comment you found helpful, you focused on those you did not.

I saw very few responses that were designed to be hurtful, even if they were not saying what it is you wanted to read.

I have started telling people in my real life this, and I will write it down for you... please give me a list of prescreened answers so that I know how you would like me to respond.[8|]


I love this idea, it's perfect for dealing with those ever so toxic family members.



hlen5 -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 9:39:35 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

..........I have started telling people in my real life this, and I will write it down for you... please give me a list of prescreened answers so that I know how you would like me to respond.[8|]


I love this idea, it's perfect for dealing with those ever so toxic family members.




Will you swish out the room after you say it??[sm=hyper.gif][sm=oddballs.gif][sm=hyper.gif]



ChatteParfaitt -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 9:41:35 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: hlen5


Will you swish out the room after you say it??[sm=hyper.gif][sm=oddballs.gif][sm=hyper.gif]



The above statement should be followed by a swishy type full flounce.



juliaoceania -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 9:43:23 AM)

quote:

I love this idea, it's perfect for dealing with those ever so toxic family members.


I have used it twice this week... I had a family member start ranting at me for suggesting she had lots to be grateful for, and the thing she is obsessively worrying about has not happened and may never happen. It was the perfect occasion to pull that line out and use it

Some people do not want constructive ideas on how to move on with their life or deal with their stress, they'd rather blame others for upsetting them... like the OP blaming her former dominant for the fact she will not control herself.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 10:45:39 AM)

I am glad I am not young anymore. Life is so full of momentousness and strife when you don't have the perspective of TIME.

Not to imply that I haven't realllly stepped in it as an older adult, but even a traumatic thing isn't as end-of-the-world as it would have seemed 30 years ago.



tazzygirl -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 11:25:40 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jaspersky

ok you little trolling jack@ss you can shove your little comment where the sun dont shine got it? i shoulda never posted here i only got one actually helpful responce all the rest were just saying the same thing over and over, and you know what i really dont much care to read anymore of the usless things the people posted here. thanks for 1 actually positive and helpful idea.


I stopped reading here.

Do you enjoy being the "fuck toy" while he continues to search for someone better?

Never make anyone your priority who keeps you as his option.

You ARE being used for sex until he gets an itch and starts looking again.

When you get tired of it, you will stop it.



LadyPact -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 11:33:01 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania
Some people do not want constructive ideas on how to move on with their life or deal with their stress, they'd rather blame others for upsetting them... like the OP blaming her former dominant for the fact she will not control herself.

Thank you.

Some answers really are that simple.  I get that some people don't want to hear a version of grow the fuck up.  At the same time, that doesn't make it a bad answer to the problem.  It's just not the one that the OP wanted to hear.



windchymes -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 11:42:14 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania
Some people do not want constructive ideas on how to move on with their life or deal with their stress, they'd rather blame others for upsetting them... like the OP blaming her former dominant for the fact she will not control herself.

Thank you.

Some answers really are that simple.  I get that some people don't want to hear a version of grow the fuck up.  At the same time, that doesn't make it a bad answer to the problem.  It's just not the one that the OP wanted to hear.



Exactly. It's so much more romantic to tell the world, 'oh, he has this power over me, I can't help myself, we have a special connection' and on and on. Everything and everyone is at fault except the one who is at fault, who expects sympathetic drama and coddling (enabling) instead of practical advice to help grow and move on.

I will never minimize the horrible feeling of unrequited love, but I have no sympathy for those who wallow in the drama.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 11:44:45 AM)

Well an afternoon's wallow is okay. But after that you're just being sloppy.



windchymes -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 11:48:26 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Well an afternoon's wallow is okay. But after that you're just being sloppy.


Actually, I totally agree. One good wallow is good for the soul. But after that, those bootstraps better be heading towards the sky! [;)]



LaTigresse -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 11:50:57 AM)

Is there any ice cream or cheese cake involved in the wallow? Or what about Hershey's syrup?

I wouldn't mind wallowing in Hershey's syrup.



LadyPact -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 11:54:56 AM)

Am I the only one hearing the tune......... And they call it puppy love.......

Look, I'm not saying that it doesn't suck when someone is in the thick of it.  We ALL go through this crud.  It's part of growing up.  At the same time, I expect this to be an adult site and that means put on the big girl panties and man the fuck up.

I just don't have sympathy for the OP.  It's the human experience.



LaTigresse -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 12:00:18 PM)

Indeed.

I think we've allllllllllll been there and bought the t-shirt. Years later we look back and laugh.



windchymes -> RE: Emotionally Bound (7/1/2011 12:03:37 PM)

I had to.....Ron, here's your warning [:D]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8NGYBrdRvU&feature=related




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