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What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 5:53:23 PM   
Laserfinger


Posts: 7
Joined: 7/5/2011
Status: offline 		Hey Folks Just a quick initial hello. In my 50's, clean, well groomed, professional, highly respectful, always a gentleman, 5'11", 189 Lbs and I feel confident with my appearance. I get those rare opportunities to hunt down sites like this and try to take advantage of the opportunity to reach out. Man, I gotta tell ya. When you have been bitten by the BDSM bug, the symptoms just lock in for the rest of your life.  I have had the wonderful experience of several partners and still keep reaching out for more. Most of my inability to have a lasting D/S relationship is due to a marriage that I have been in for over 20 years that is void of the D/S sexuality. Hey my bad, right? I am here in Arlington Tx and I am married. My wife is unaware of my attempt to reach out to play with other partners. I guess it goes without saying that discretion is highly important. I prefer to submit to a lady that is comfortable and highly confident with being my leader. My genetics gave me a personality from birth that always leaned toward pleasing, giving and I truly enjoy the art of pleasing my Mistress or dominant female partner. I am not gay or bi but I would consider myself bi-curious. That really sets up some natural limits to test. I am hoping to meet someone in the Arlington TX area that feels comfortable with my need for discretion and will give me an opportunity to prove my worthiness. I am familiar with rates or donations that the pros generally ask for and I very seldom have the extra funds to cover that. I guess I would really get lucky if I met a lady 35 or over that understood my variation with donations. Of course, it would be great if I could find other areas of value to her rather than just money. Not saying I can't donate, just saying, the amounts would be sporadic. Ok, I am hoping I have been cordial, and have not stepped on anyone's toes.  I am just speaking from the heart and telling it all straight up. Hoping to here from you. Have a wonderful day.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 6:14:55 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		Well, I gotta give you props for honesty.  Welcome to collarme.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to Laserfinger)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 7:22:53 PM   
smartsub10


Posts: 865
Joined: 4/23/2010
Status: offline 		So, if the wife doesn't find out, it's all good, right?  Hmmm.

Welcome to CM.....and good luck.


_____________________________

Beauty fades...stupid is forever
~ Judge Judith Scheindlin
____________________________________________

“Be that self which one truly is" ~Soren Kierkegaard

(in reply to Laserfinger)
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RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 7:29:25 PM   
Laserfinger


Posts: 7
Joined: 7/5/2011
Status: offline 		Hey Smart, that is not how I feel about this whole thing. Everything is not OK if the wife doesn't find out. The fact is, I have a conscience and I know deep down, I am not being true to her and that is being underhanded and dishonest. I don't like doing that. It sticks in my craw. The need is pushing me past it though.

(in reply to smartsub10)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 7:39:09 PM   
smartsub10


Posts: 865
Joined: 4/23/2010
Status: offline 		Sure.  your "need" is far more important than your wife's feelings if she should find out.  You're not the first guy to come to this site with the idea that the women in this lifestyle have no morals or values and are willing to hook up with any Tom, Dick or Harry who needs to get his jollies on the side while wanting to preserve his marriage.  Most of the women here on the forums want relationships built on honesty and trust.  That's impossible when the man is married and fooling around without his wife's knowledge or consent.

_____________________________

Beauty fades...stupid is forever
~ Judge Judith Scheindlin
____________________________________________

“Be that self which one truly is" ~Soren Kierkegaard

(in reply to Laserfinger)
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RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 7:42:48 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Welcome to the forums.  I have every reason to believe you will get exactly the reception that you deserve and probably exactly the one that you and your wife need.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to smartsub10)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 7:43:20 PM   
Killerangel


Posts: 1169
Joined: 8/3/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Laserfinger

Hey Smart, that is not how I feel about this whole thing. Everything is not OK if the wife doesn't find out. The fact is, I have a conscience and I know deep down, I am not being true to her and that is being underhanded and dishonest. I don't like doing that. It sticks in my craw. The need is pushing me past it though.


Hello, welcome to CM.
The thing is, we've heard from people in your position before and it doesn't tend to go well. Many people won't associate with others who are married or want confirmation from the spouse that it's ok. You may think that your wife would never understand or never go for it, but actually there have been several good threads on things to do to perhaps slowly bring her around. What have you got to lose except some time searching with the search feature and reading? The boards here are really quite instructive and maybe there's an answer in there somewhere that'll make you feel better about the whole thing.

(in reply to Laserfinger)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 7:47:27 PM   
Laserfinger


Posts: 7
Joined: 7/5/2011
Status: offline 		I have no defense to offer as you are correct.
I would simply reference the topic of my post.    

What are the odds? You have just answered that one for me. Of course, I was well aware that the odds of meeting someone are slim.

Again, thank you for shootin straight.l

(in reply to smartsub10)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 8:00:45 PM   
Laserfinger


Posts: 7
Joined: 7/5/2011
Status: offline 		Killerangel thanks for the warm welcome.

(in reply to Killerangel)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 8:06:32 PM   
Laserfinger


Posts: 7
Joined: 7/5/2011
Status: offline 		Thank you Ladypact.
Your welcoming message really does a great job of forcing a person to start reading between the lines.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 9:13:03 PM   
MistressDarkArt


Posts: 5178
Status: offline 		Welcome to CM, Laser. Given your situation, methinks if the odds are good, the 'goods' will be odd

(in reply to Laserfinger)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/5/2011 10:48:22 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5169
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline 		Funny things sometime happen.  I have some friends who were married to each other.  Both were interested in exploring BDSM but just knew the other would not even consider it.  Then one day one of them saw what the other was reading online.  (light bulb lights up)  The other one was reading about BDSM!!!  Fancy that.  Could it be?  Was it possible...?

Yep, they had both had the same desires for years but never told the other.  They knew their spouse would think they were crazy.  So much better to not say anything. 

So they finally had the talk they should have had years before.  Next thing you know they were thoroughly involved, exploring, and learning all sorts of neat techniques and things. 

Yep, it's really funny about life. 

< Message edited by peppermint -- 7/5/2011 11:41:46 PM >

(in reply to Laserfinger)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/6/2011 1:38:08 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Laserfinger


What are the odds? You have just answered that one for me. Of course, I was well aware that the odds of meeting someone are slim.

Again, thank you for shootin straight.l



The odds are very very slim, you want a relationship on your terms but have very little to offer. If you were a woman, would you be happy with the stolen minutes somebody could give you and being prepared that he's only there when he feels the need, rest of the time you're alone. Leave BDSM aside and think your sister or daughter would have a relationship with a guy who's in another relationship already and his wife doesn't know that he's seeing somebody on the side - what would you tell her?

Once you put the shoe on the other foot, it doesn't sound good, does it?


_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to Laserfinger)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/6/2011 3:41:53 AM   
0ldhen


Posts: 2221
Joined: 12/27/2010
From: Henhouse in Trolltopia, Harleyville USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Welcome to the forums.  I have every reason to believe you will get exactly the reception that you deserve and probably exactly the one that you and your wife need.




I'll second THIS welcome.

And add that given your situation, perhaps a prodomme might be your best bet.

< Message edited by 0ldhen -- 7/6/2011 3:43:50 AM >

_____________________________

Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't.

Za'beeta Regal, Et Vogo O' Lurwadra'd Wyka Go Abosh Inunsey.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/6/2011 5:50:23 AM   
OohAahMrs


Posts: 7723
Joined: 7/14/2010
Status: offline 		Hey Lase, welcome of course, i'd say the odds are good, although you'll have to research and follow every angle, I've had many fun times in the US not all involving wads of dollars. The wife thing should concern you though, basically you're cheating on her, how about while your out having your kind of fun, she's got some guy round having her kind of fun, that'll be alright by you i take it?

_____________________________

You may choc the choc.........Oh forget it......

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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/6/2011 7:55:37 AM   
ashjor911


Posts: 7793
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: balcony, having a Smoke
Status: offline 		Welcome To CM

_____________________________

"operative" working undercover for the federal government of bangladesh.

my name is : bonsh ... jamesh bonsh.
code name : 009.5
licensed to give formla

(in reply to OohAahMrs)
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RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/6/2011 11:08:52 AM   
MistressDarkArt


Posts: 5178
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: 0ldhen

And add that given your situation, perhaps a prodomme might be your best bet.


Hen, he says above he can't always afford to pay the going rate for a pro. I guess that's when the wife won't give him his allowance

(in reply to 0ldhen)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/6/2011 12:28:51 PM   
Laserfinger


Posts: 7
Joined: 7/5/2011
Status: offline 		Those odds just keep getting worse and worse, don't they? Hey, I do appreciate the kudos for being honest. I probably should just sign up under another username and state that I am single.

Some have the capability of being totally dishonest with themselves. They actually have the ability to take some those skeletons and poof make them disappear. You know, just like they actually didn't happen. Those people that are throwing stones and living in glass houses. Oh well, each to his own.

What are the odds that most of the so called single guys on here are actually married??   Hmmmmmmmm

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/6/2011 12:49:32 PM   
Jayrays


Posts: 2
Joined: 7/6/2011
Status: offline 		Heh, I'm not married and I feel like my odds are almost just as bad as yours if not worse. I'm into tickling fetish and want to find a lady who shares that interest with me, but I am starting to feel like there's only a handful of people on the face of the earth who have any interest in it whatsoever. Being single and STILL having those terrible odds.. how do you think I feel?

< Message edited by Jayrays -- 7/6/2011 12:50:16 PM >

(in reply to Laserfinger)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: What Are The Odds? - 7/6/2011 2:45:21 PM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Laserfinger

Those odds just keep getting worse and worse, don't they? Hey, I do appreciate the kudos for being honest. I probably should just sign up under another username and state that I am single.

Some have the capability of being totally dishonest with themselves. They actually have the ability to take some those skeletons and poof make them disappear. You know, just like they actually didn't happen. Those people that are throwing stones and living in glass houses. Oh well, each to his own.

What are the odds that most of the so called single guys on here are actually married??   Hmmmmmmmm



What are the odds that married guys posing as singles will be busted pretty soon? You know if they can only be called at certain times, have rather limited time available, never invite somebody to their house, spend holidays and weekends at home... You really think women won't notice?

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to Laserfinger)
Profile   Post #: 20
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