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[Poll]

Were your parents fair to you?


most the time
  34% (15)
some of the time
  23% (10)
all of the time
  13% (6)
seldom
  23% (10)
unsure
  4% (2)


Total Votes : 43
(last vote on : 10/8/2012 8:10:22 PM)
(Poll will run till: -- )
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RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/10/2011 7:27:55 PM   
slvemike4u


Posts: 17896
Joined: 1/15/2008
From: United States
Status: offline 		Not in the least,but they taught me a valuable lesson......after coming out of that house,with all the scars and damaged psyche....I ,as a parent myself,recognized the absolute necessity for a child to feel unwavering love,constant safety...and ultimate security in both.As a result I have the best son in the whole damm world( though I doubt he could beat up everyone else's sons) and the warmest,lovingest relationship it is possible to have.I accomplished that by being nothing like my own dad.....for that,I guess,I should thank him....but the bastard is long dead so there is no need to

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RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/10/2011 8:25:59 PM   
ladyneedshelp


Posts: 78
Joined: 4/18/2011
Status: offline 		My parents were the greatest. Even our friends thought so! Most even called them mom and dad. They were scout masters and always took the VW bus (pre seat belt days) full of kids to places like the pool....or boating on the meer. The water was waist deep and they has canoes kyacks john boats and little sail boats and little islands that u could land on like captin hooks ship or puff the magic dragon isle....we would take a picnic and have a great day! . They made life an adventure. We used to drive a thousand miles to spend 2 nights camping and checking out diffrent areas.....nothing like 4 day weekend adventures! dad was in the air force so we even went to England and parts of Europe! There was game nights for the family and better yet game night with friends......they forgot about us till ten! We were not rich but comfortable, dad retired in my teen years and went to work in private industry....we felt rich then! LOL! In some ways it sometimes felt like one of us was getting special treatment, but in the end we all got special treatment. Right up to the end of their lives they were there for us always. Anyone who knew them knew they could go to mom and dad for wise words, understanding or a helping hand. I was amazingly blessed. To top it off.....though not in the lifestyle.....in the home mom was dominate and dad was submissive. Many a night we kids laid on the floor watching tv while dad rubbed moms feet.....I miss them!

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Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/10/2011 9:10:29 PM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline 		No. When I really needed them my mother turned on me and blamed me for everything, and my father refused to challenge her, even though he told me in private he disagreed with her. This behaviour of hers continues to this day. I am alternately lying about it, or I caused it, depending on her mood.

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/11/2011 6:05:11 PM   
tiggerspoohbear


Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline 		My dad was great, not my mom.  My sister, although 2 1/2 yrs younger was always the one I was compared against.  I may not have liked her much, but I did love her, she was my mom.  I lost her almost 4 yrs ago, and even if we hadn't made up, I do miss her every day.  I'm lucky that my dad met his g/f less than a year after my mom passed, and she's the mom I wish I had. But mine did the best she could with what she had.  Raised small town French Catholic where the priest in the town over-rode the mayor and any other higher ups, religion was what she knew.  And I didn't live up to that image until she got sick. 

I'm glad my dad outlasted her, as sad as it it for me to say so, but she had no friends, relied on my sister and me and it would have been pure hell.  Before we lost my BIL to ALS 2 1/2 yrs ago, he told her that if my dad went first there was no way in hell my mom was moving in with them, he would have had to divorce my sister.  She realized the same thing.  And there was no way I could have lived with her, I'd be in jail today or awaiting trial.


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RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/11/2011 9:20:44 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline 		My mother taught me, by example, the type of parent i would never want to be.
My father did nothing to stop her.


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RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/12/2011 6:07:55 AM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Both my parents were great.

Mom is still alive. 

I had things quite good- tho at the time- I did not think so.   Now that I am an adult I am amazed at just how much they made for our family.

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/12/2011 6:17:50 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		My grandparents did their best.  They loved me.  They weren't always fair.  They often didn't reward good things.  But never once did I wonder if they loved and supported me.  Never once.  I was never scared of them.  I was never afraid that their hands would strike me.  Even if they got really mad, it was obvious no harm would ever come to me.  We should all be so lucky.

They both absolutely believed in me.  (Well Grandpa did.  Grandma believed I was smart but that I'd be a bad girl.  They were both right.)


best,
sunshine


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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/12/2011 7:25:53 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		The 'rents were awesome. 

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/12/2011 7:28:14 AM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		Your poll is lacking a "no" option, sparky.

My parents were ignorant hillbillies who did the best they could, which frankly was not all that great. Fortunately they were from different parts of WV, so they were not cousins, and therefore their progeny were not born swimming in the low low end of the gene pool.

I grew up fast and learned that life is not always fair, that not everyone gets dealt a good hand, and that I had a choice: blame my parents for who I was for the rest of my life, or grow up and get over it.

It made me a tough person in many ways, not all of them positive. But like Holly, I did have excellent examples of how not to be when I had my own kids.

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RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/12/2011 8:51:59 AM   
VirginPotty


Posts: 11624
Joined: 7/16/2008
From: Virginville
Status: offline 		Most of the time was my vote.

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RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/13/2011 8:49:08 AM   
bisubpet4u


Posts: 2
Joined: 7/9/2007
Status: offline 		old lady - religious fanatic
old man - drunked, why? see old lady

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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/13/2011 8:54:10 AM   
girlygurl


Posts: 6973
Joined: 8/5/2007
From: in the palms of His hands
Status: offline 		No, but as many said, they did the best they could.

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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/13/2011 8:54:22 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		What is the definition of fair?

Life is not fair.

From my perspective, my parents are and were the most loving, supportive, patient parents in the world.

Did I think things were unfair when I was 16? Sometimes.

Do I think so now? No. Why? Because I grew up. I feel blessed to have them in my life.

People who persist in not recognizing that parents have flaws, forget that parents are also human.


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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/13/2011 4:08:07 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

My parents were ignorant hillbillies who did the best they could, which frankly was not all that great. Fortunately they were from different parts of WV, so they were not cousins, and therefore their progeny were not born swimming in the low low end of the gene pool.


"My parents were ignorant niggers who did the best they could, which frankly was not all that great. Fortunately they were from different parts of the hood, so they were not cousins, and therefore their progeny were not born retarded crackheads." Anyone find that offensive? It's no different than the filthy bigotry written above. And just because you're talking about your own bloodline, doesn't make it any less bigoted and hateful. Wow.
luci

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/13/2011 4:09:33 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline 		Ha, CM won't even PRINT the "N" word instead of "hillbillies." Hey mods. Why don't you censor ALL bigoted names? "Hillbillies" is just as filthy............luci

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RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/13/2011 4:16:57 PM   
hlen5


Posts: 5890
Joined: 3/2/2008
Status: offline 		Nope, although I'll chime in with everyone else who said they did the best they could at the time. They did well compared to the parenting they recieved, favoritism aside.


ETA: Hunky, if your parents were fair, why the question?

< Message edited by hlen5 -- 7/13/2011 4:17:38 PM >

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RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/13/2011 4:21:55 PM   
Aylee


Posts: 24103
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline 		~Fast Reply~

Sarah: That's not fair!
Jareth: You say that so often! I wonder what your basis for comparison is.


How would I know if they were "fair"?

I only have one set so I have nothing to compare it to.

Besides, I thought that parents were 'unfair' because they were parents. Isn't it part of the pre-natal contract?

As a matter of fact my 4 year old declared me "unfair" the other day. I cannot even remember what I had told her, but she sat down on the couch, crossed her arms, and said, "That's not fair." I told her, "Too bad, that's the way it is." And then hurried out of the room to laugh at her.

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RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/13/2011 4:32:51 PM   
JstAnotherSub


Posts: 6174
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

my parents did the best they could with the person I was growing up....

Mom still does.

I will grant that the material (me) that they worked with was deeply flawed, so they had a hard time wiht it..


but I will always say that my folks didnt fuck up... *I* did...


This, except my mom passed away in 2000. The one thing that they did do was always love me, in spite of the shit I put them through. So, no, they weren't fair, thank God.

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Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/13/2011 4:36:32 PM   
JstAnotherSub


Posts: 6174
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci


quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

My parents were ignorant hillbillies who did the best they could, which frankly was not all that great. Fortunately they were from different parts of WV, so they were not cousins, and therefore their progeny were not born swimming in the low low end of the gene pool.


"My parents were ignorant niggers who did the best they could, which frankly was not all that great. Fortunately they were from different parts of the hood, so they were not cousins, and therefore their progeny were not born retarded crackheads." Anyone find that offensive? It's no different than the filthy bigotry written above. And just because you're talking about your own bloodline, doesn't make it any less bigoted and hateful. Wow.
luci



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yep

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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Were your parents fair to you? - 7/13/2011 4:43:18 PM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline 		fr

nope, my mum was bloody awful a great deal of the time. sometimes i deserved a fraction of what she dished out, mostly she was way over board. i've tried very hard to be nothing like her as a parent.

needles

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Profile   Post #: 40
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