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RE: Question about masochism - 7/14/2011 7:28:20 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		so... um... yeah...
uh...

it got a little warm in here...


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RE: Question about masochism - 7/14/2011 7:48:30 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: winspiritsbaby

Thank you all for your responses.
Decadent...I think you're right, martyrdom does seem to fit a little better.



I suppose some people might see giving pleasure to their partner as "martyrdom"... funny, I never have felt like a martyr for that anymore than I feel like a martyr for giving a back rub.

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Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

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RE: Question about masochism - 7/14/2011 7:56:04 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

The psychological definition is wrong. The proper definition of a masochist is one who acts like or has an interest in the behaviour described by the writer Leopold von Sacher-Masoch. He wrote about all kinds of things - pain, pleasure, cruelty, submission, fetishes, slave contracts and much more. His fantasies were mangled to fit the new-fangled 'science' of psychology, which needed labels for its project, and they chewed up the works of Masoch to get at them.


Word usage changes...here is what medical definition online...

quote:

mas·och·ism (ms-kzm)
n.
1. The act or an instance of deriving sexual gratification from being physically or emotionally abused.
2. A psychological disorder in which sexual gratification is derived from being physically or emotionally abused.
3. The act or an instance of deriving pleasure from being offended, dominated, or mistreated.
4. The tendency to seek such mistreatment.


http://medical-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/masochism

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sadomasochism
Sadomasochism broadly refers to the receiving of pleasure—often sexual—from acts involving the infliction or receiving of pain or humiliation. The name originates from two authors on the subject, the Marquis de Sade and Leopold von Sacher-Masoch. A subset of BDSM, practitioners of sadomasochism usually seek out sexual gratification from these acts, but often seek out other forms of pleasure as well. While the terms sadist and masochist specifically refer to one who either enjoys giving pain(sadist), or one who enjoys receiving pain(masochist), many practitioners of sadomasochism describe themselves as at least somewhat of a switch, or someone who can receive pleasure from either inflicting or receiving pain.


_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to OwnedFemaleFlesh)
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RE: Question about masochism - 7/14/2011 8:36:19 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

so... um... yeah...
uh...

it got a little warm in here...



yeah...we need to maybe... open a window...or something...

*fapfapfap*

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RE: Question about masochism - 7/14/2011 8:55:01 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: winspiritsbaby

Thank you all for your responses.
Decadent...I think you're right, martyrdom does seem to fit a little better.


I am not a masochist. I am not a martyr.

I am a submissive woman who happens to get off on eroticized pain done in certian ways by someone I connect with.

I don't see a trace of martrydom in being excited if your partner is into something. Of course this depends on the level of sadism involved.

There are some things that push me out of the erotic pain zone and in that case, I just will not do it, no matter who it is.

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RE: Question about masochism - 7/14/2011 8:57:22 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

Oooooh, she hates, and I mean hateshateshates the pain. She twists, she cries, mewls, moans, whines, begs, grovels, pleads and suffers...buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut she absolutely adores the harsh control, the fact that I'll take what she would never give, that I'll make her suffer to slake my desires, and that I'll take her to the brink over and over again to do so.She loves (As in that wonderful love/hate/love thing slaves/subs have) the fact that I can and will treat her like a piece of meat, that I will just tear through all her pathetic id defenses and reduce her to a quivering piece of cunt meat.

My kink is power.
Hers is surrender.
All that we do are branches that spring from this main trunk.



Jeez..I missed this. Another swoon strike for Kana. :)

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RE: Question about masochism - 7/14/2011 9:26:43 AM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		I would say yes, because martyrdom is a form of masochism.

quote:

ORIGINAL: winspiritsbaby
If that pleasure is derived from pleasing your Mistress/Master/Domme/Dom and not directly from the act itself, would a person still be considered a masochist?



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pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Question about masochism - 7/14/2011 10:18:45 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		My partners loves the idea of pain but hates it when I hurt her intensely. I can just about tear her nipples off and most of that is pleasure but at a certain point, her cunt can hurt and of course the rest of her. However, she loves the marks afterwords, looking in the mirror and seeing where my hand bruised her ass or cunt.

I try not to think about it much anymore and just beat her, we both get off in some way and that is enough for us!

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Question about masochism - 7/14/2011 12:20:36 PM   
winspiritsbaby


Posts: 141
Status: offline 		Thank you all. Many of you have brought up some interesting points.

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RE: Question about masochism - 7/14/2011 1:28:28 PM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline
quote:

it's fucking complicated and that's the truth.
No it's not in the least Hun, the answer is right there in your post.

quote:

she does get pleasure from being hurt by me

quote:

she didn't get the kick of hurting for me


It's all about you, that you are the one doing it. See, really very simple.

(in reply to HannahLynHeather)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Question about masochism - 7/14/2011 2:27:27 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		Fast reply

What about those of us who ARE masochists BUT we do not derive sexual gratification from the pain, nor do we derive any kind of 'pleasure' at all...yet, we seek the pain, and we seek higher levels of pain...for other reasons?



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RE: Question about masochism - 7/15/2011 3:53:25 PM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline 		I guess that really would depend on what those other reasons were. If it was, for example, as a form of self-punishment, to atone for some sin or failing, then I would say no. If it were to achieve some sort of transcendental mind space, I might say yes, I'm not sure about that one really.

So yeah, it depends.

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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Question about masochism - 7/15/2011 3:57:56 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

Fast reply

What about those of us who ARE masochists BUT we do not derive sexual gratification from the pain, nor do we derive any kind of 'pleasure' at all...yet, we seek the pain, and we seek higher levels of pain...for other reasons?




Okay well shit on me. If Heather can have the cojones to answer, then so can I.


I don't get this, at all. My mind says this means you need help. But then when I think about it, that you need help to satisfy your own needs, but not another's, makes no fucking sense.

What can I say? This is a type of emotional and physical masochism I am not acquainted with. So I shall bow out and wish you well. No judgements, if you please.




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RE: Question about masochism - 7/15/2011 4:08:34 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		I will not answer for IrishMist, but I am sure there are people into physical violence for many reason, maybe it is a huge adrenaline rush.

Think about Fight Clubs and boxing, etc. It does not have to be sexual.

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RE: Question about masochism - 7/15/2011 5:30:20 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		LOL

Ok, I guess I can answer the question that was not asked about the question that I posted.

Think about it. Everyone ASSUMES that a masochist derives some kind of pleasure from the pain...it's assumed that this pleasure is the reason WHY they are masochists in the first place.

Yet, there are some out there...like me lol...who don't actually get that kind of pleasure from pain. I enjoy pain simply because it's a reminder to me that I live and can still feel (I am not going to go into that more deeply...already been there on the boards and not going to revisit )
YET, I get no actual pleasure out of the pain that is inflicted, nor do I receive any sexual gratification from it. It's simply a reminder for me.

So...what about those of us who fit outside the box of assumed definitions for masochists?



I love throwing a wrench in everyone's spokes

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RE: Question about masochism - 7/15/2011 5:35:32 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist
Yet, there are some out there...like me lol...who don't actually get that kind of pleasure from pain. I enjoy pain simply because it's a reminder to me that I live and can still feel (I am not going to go into that more deeply...already been there on the boards and not going to revisit )

Serious question here and no snark intended: If the only purpose the pain serves is a reminder that you "live and can still feel," why wouldn't something that feels good work just as well? For instance, a foot massage. It would remind you that you are alive and it feels wonderful (if you're not too ticklish). Wouldn't indulging in nice sensations like eating delicious foods, getting a massage, etc. serve that same purpose just as well? Intrigued and curious...........luci

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RE: Question about masochism - 7/15/2011 5:39:38 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Serious question here and no snark intended: If the only purpose the pain serves is a reminder that you "live and can still feel," why wouldn't something that feels good work just as well? For instance, a foot massage. It would remind you that you are alive and it feels wonderful (if you're not too ticklish). Wouldn't indulging in nice sensations like eating delicious foods, getting a massage, etc. serve that same purpose just as well? Intrigued and curious...........luci

Actually no...a massage would not work simply because I need the pain to take the edge off my own personality...which is the reason why I seek it out to begin with. A foot massage, while it may be nice and feel good...does nothing to 'quiet' the beast, so to speak.

However, this is not about me.

It was a serious question I asked. All too often, people overlook those who are perfectly normal in every way, yet, seek out sensations for reasons that do not fall into 'the normal reasons'.

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Question about masochism - 7/15/2011 5:50:35 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline 		Gotcha. Thanks for the answer......luci

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Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Question about masochism - 7/15/2011 5:51:07 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci


quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist
Yet, there are some out there...like me lol...who don't actually get that kind of pleasure from pain. I enjoy pain simply because it's a reminder to me that I live and can still feel (I am not going to go into that more deeply...already been there on the boards and not going to revisit )

Serious question here and no snark intended: If the only purpose the pain serves is a reminder that you "live and can still feel," why wouldn't something that feels good work just as well? For instance, a foot massage. It would remind you that you are alive and it feels wonderful (if you're not too ticklish). Wouldn't indulging in nice sensations like eating delicious foods, getting a massage, etc. serve that same purpose just as well? Intrigued and curious...........luci


luci: A wonderful question, but I fear one that does not go the full gamut of understanding. Pleasure is all pervasive and easy to find in this society. Pain, not so much. For whatever reason she needs that which is NOT SPOKEN. Not erotic pain, not discipline for wrongdoing. Just. Plain. Pain. For it's very own sake.

My own emotional labyrinth is much more convoluted. I say: I want pain b/c HE needs it. My own need for pain is secondary, I am the sub, after all. I can think, I need pain b/c it pleases HIM.

Irish is saying, I need pain, b/c  it please ME.

Think about those differences. Think about what that means, for who I am, for who Irish is.

Let's get clear, I am NOT saying I have answers, I am saying, I have tossed something out there.....where can we take it?




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RE: Question about masochism - 7/15/2011 5:55:02 PM   
Pteryx


Posts: 29
Joined: 7/14/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci


quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist
Yet, there are some out there...like me lol...who don't actually get that kind of pleasure from pain. I enjoy pain simply because it's a reminder to me that I live and can still feel (I am not going to go into that more deeply...already been there on the boards and not going to revisit )

Serious question here and no snark intended: If the only purpose the pain serves is a reminder that you "live and can still feel," why wouldn't something that feels good work just as well? For instance, a foot massage. It would remind you that you are alive and it feels wonderful (if you're not too ticklish). Wouldn't indulging in nice sensations like eating delicious foods, getting a massage, etc. serve that same purpose just as well? Intrigued and curious...........luci


luci: A wonderful question, but I fear one that does not go the full gamut of understanding. Pleasure is all pervasive and easy to find in this society. Pain, not so much. For whatever reason she needs that which is NOT SPOKEN. Not erotic pain, not discipline for wrongdoing. Just. Plain. Pain. For it's very own sake.

My own emotional labyrinth is much more convoluted. I say: I want pain b/c HE needs it. My own need for pain is secondary, I am the sub, after all. I can think, I need pain b/c it pleases HIM.

Irish is saying, I need pain, b/c  it please ME.

Think about those differences. Think about what that means, for who I am, for who Irish is.

Let's get clear, I am NOT saying I have answers, I am saying, I have tossed something out there.....where can we take it?






that, chatte, is an elegant answer.

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