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I don't know you, but I find your comment to be almost laughable. You strike me as someone who discovered D/s on-line rather than in real life.

I've been openly involved in D/s for almost 20 years, and I've NEVER met anyone at a real life event who felt that they were inherently superior to subs/slaves (who were not their own) simply due to their own self-appointed role as a "Dominant".

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I kindly correct them, just as I would if they misspelled my name.
Them: Good Morning, Slave.
Me: Good Morning, Joe. Perhaps you weren't aware, but my name is Kiya. :)

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ORIGINAL: kalikshama

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I kindly correct them, just as I would if they misspelled my name.
Them: Good Morning, Slave.
Me: Good Morning, Joe. Perhaps you weren't aware, but my name is Kiya. :)

Would you ever move forward with someone like this or are you just providing a public service?

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ORIGINAL: kalikshama

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I don't know you, but I find your comment to be almost laughable. You strike me as someone who discovered D/s on-line rather than in real life.

I've been openly involved in D/s for almost 20 years, and I've NEVER met anyone at a real life event who felt that they were inherently superior to subs/slaves (who were not their own) simply due to their own self-appointed role as a "Dominant".

I've been wondering about this myself recently.

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ORIGINAL: OwnedFemaleFlesh

Another related irritation is when other subs (often Gorean) insist on calling my Owner Sir, even after he has told them not to.
owned xxx

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ORIGINAL: kalikshama

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I kindly correct them, just as I would if they misspelled my name.
Them: Good Morning, Slave.
Me: Good Morning, Joe. Perhaps you weren't aware, but my name is Kiya. :)

Would you ever move forward with someone like this or are you just providing a public service?

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ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

For God's sake, woman, I have to compete with your live-in Dom AND this guy as well?  I am a strong, proud Dominant, dammit!!!!!!

/Takes a number, shuffles powerfully to the end of the line/

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ORIGINAL: Buzzzz

I also hate it when I see some doms talk to newbies (or the person that is with me)at munches and such an calls her "little one" .

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ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Don't forget my male submissive !!

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ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

It's funny... I have gotten a little more ... relaxed about this.  Every word spoken here in Korea pretty much can have an honorific used with it.  Honorifics are just part of the way things get done here.  Of course my form of honorific tends to be, "anyang hoshmikah, sugar darling!"  Hey, it's an honor to be called "sugar darling" by me.

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ORIGINAL: OwnedFemaleFlesh

I never call anyone Sir but my Owner. If I called everyone Sir, how would I give my Owner the extra respect he deserves? I agree that if *I* approached a Dom wanting to play with them, submit to them or be considered by them then it might be a nice idea to start as I meant to go on. But this doesn't explain why Doms who approach me for 'a chat' or 'friendship' then try to insist on being called Sir. It seems to me that there are many low-status individuals who use online BDSM as a way to get the respect they fail to get in their real life. Unfortunately for them, they are not going to get that respect from me.

Another related irritation is when other subs (often Gorean) insist on calling my Owner Sir, even after he has told them not to. For him, Sir is the personal, sexual, intimate title that I give him and for others in BDSM to refer to him by that title is an attempt by them to position themselves as submissive to him, something which he has not asked for or consented to. It is particularly rude for them to continue after he has made his feelings clear, claiming 'that's just what I call all Doms' and imposing their standards onto him.

If someone says 'call me Sir' I simply say 'no thanks' and carry on with what I was saying previously. No-one can dominate you without your permission!

owned xxx

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ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

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ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

It's funny... I have gotten a little more ... relaxed about this.  Every word spoken here in Korea pretty much can have an honorific used with it.  Honorifics are just part of the way things get done here.  Of course my form of honorific tends to be, "anyang hoshmikah, sugar darling!"  Hey, it's an honor to be called "sugar darling" by me.

What is so interesting about this conversation, is that in a profession situation, I have no problem calling someone Sir. I have often been called upon to address someone when I didn't know their name. Sir or Ma'am works fine for that, or Miss if they seem young enough.

It's a staple of the business world.

It's just to me, in the BDSM world, Sir (or Ma'am) means something beyond basic etiquette. In implies a connection and a sign of respect I don't have (and am never going to have) for the average desktop dom.

Although I admit I would use it in a real time situation where I thought it was called for, b/c I respect the person, or b/c it was expedient. For example, at a munch where I have not been introduced, I would say: "Sir, may I ask your name?" usually I can tell a male dom from a male sub, but I would use the Sir anyway, and a male sub would give me a look and make it clear I was wrong about what side of the kneel he was on.

In most cases the dom will introduce himself, realizing I called him Sir b/c I didn't know his name. To me, saying "Hey you" is rude, and it doesn't matter if I am in domme or sub mode. It's just not polite and not the way I want to put my best self forward when meeting new people.

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ORIGINAL: ChasteDream

obviously since you're a slave and I'm a Master, its crystal clear which of us is right!

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ORIGINAL: ChasteDream

obviously since you're a slave and I'm a Master, its crystal clear which of us is right!