RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (Full Version)

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allalone47 -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/17/2006 4:32:49 PM)

It is about right and wrong. But if you read and look it is one side that states that the other side is worng and than goes and does what it states the other is doing., and isn't. Yes the politdtions are the problem but the bigger one is we put them there.



Sdarcy -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/17/2006 7:08:14 PM)

My comment to Ms. Anne was pertinent to the relationships mentioned by other Mistresses here. I met Ms. Anne a few years ago and at one point invited her to a private function at my dungeon at which she appeared with a man whom I did not know and whom I had not been advised would be arriving. As I later found out, she didn't really know him either, thereby compounding the faux pas. They had both been drinking and interrupted several scenes as well as being generally loud and intrusive. For those unaware - it is simply not done to show up at someone's private dungeon with a stranger. We don't care to have our locations made public, and we must know in advance exactly who is going to be there. Had it been anyone else showing up for the first time with a stranger I would have turned them away at the door.

I made a comment later about her friend to someone else, something about his being a silly little yuppie, and that was enough to warrant a vicious vendetta against me lasting at least two years. I don't visit chat rooms and don't have verbatim records - but I was informed by quite a few people about some very nasty and untrue things said about me by Ms. Anne. I haven't kept track as these things don't interest me - I was vaguely aware that the gossip had stopped coming back to me and assumed she'd found another target for her animosity.

All things being said, though, I would definitely take anything said by Ms. Anne as having been spun dizzily in her favor - not that we don't all attempt to present ourselves in our best light, but I'd think twice before sending a check to the legal fund. She's a very intelligent woman, absolutely, but IMO a bit apt to gloss over ethical issues if they're inconvenient to her purpose.

I'm sure I'll receive something unpleasant in reply - unfortunately, I probably won't see it.

Regards,

Ms. Susanne D'Arcy



MizSuz -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/19/2006 4:51:55 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sdarcy

All things being said, though, I would definitely take anything said by Ms. Anne as having been spun dizzily in her favor - not that we don't all attempt to present ourselves in our best light, but I'd think twice before sending a check to the legal fund. She's a very intelligent woman, absolutely, but IMO a bit apt to gloss over ethical issues if they're inconvenient to her purpose.

I'm sure I'll receive something unpleasant in reply - unfortunately, I probably won't see it.

Regards,

Ms. Susanne D'Arcy




Ms. D'Arcy,

Bravo to you for stepping forward in a public venue to state your experience even knowing that it may put you in line for yet another obsessive smear campaign, as has been seen time and time again with this person and anyone with the gall to hold her accountable for her less than functional behaviour and grossly spinned presentations. 

Those of us that have suffered this sort of behaviour from her know that it's her trademark and that she has a very long list of people she has done similar things to in her wake.  Wouldn't it be nice if all of them would find this post and step up to detail their own experiences with "the maitresse"?

Off the top of my head I can think of at least a half dozen, one being the NCSF.  Those are just the ones I know of and have born witness to.  I will eschew naming anyone other than the NCSF (a public organization), though, because I think these people should make this choice for themself.  Especially since doing so may put you in her sites for more smear campaigns.

Again, bravo to you, Ms. D'Arcy.

Edited to add - I recall her spending a good deal of time in AOL chatrooms bragging about knowing you.  That stopped suddenly and I assumed it was because you too had not embraced her as much as she wanted to let people think.  I know you to be a bright woman with a long history in the scene and everyone I know who knows you respects you considerably.  I'm sorry that you, too, suffered the smear campaign that so many have had to endure.



BBWDomme1 -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/19/2006 7:23:37 AM)

I just re-read my previous post and feel the need to clarify one line.  I posted that I recalled the exchanges between Suz and Ann and found the synopsis by Suz to be credible.  I also say that I remembered said exchanges because they were inappropriate.  Let me clarify what I meant.  I meant that I remembered them and considered Suz's posting credible because Ann's interactions were inappropriate, not Suz.

Sorry for any confusion.



Sdarcy -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/19/2006 9:35:04 AM)

Thanks so much for your kind words! Although - ego does drive me to point out that I was Maitresse long before Ms. Anne picked it up. I believe we even had a conversation about it at one point, but that was years ago.

I sincerely wish Ms. Anne would find a different way to express her disagreements with people - all things considered, she really is quite brilliant, and potentially a wonderful addition to the BDSM scene. As things stand, however, I find her behavior to be most often abusive and frequently dangerous to others.

Regards,

Ms. Susanne

quote:

ORIGINAL: MizSuz


Those of us that have suffered this sort of behaviour from her know that it's her trademark and that she has a very long list of people she has done similar things to in her wake.  Wouldn't it be nice if all of them would find this post and step up to detail their own experiences with "the maitresse"?






MisPandora -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/19/2006 2:36:41 PM)

Tis a shame that she was apparently too drunk to remember being at your space, much less meeting you.  The ethics of said individual would certainly be called into question if she didn't recognize that bringing an uninvited guest to a private party is a no-no, much less doing what she was doing in a gated community.  That simply deserves a DUH.



MaitresseMissAnn -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/19/2006 3:13:51 PM)

I push edges, that is what a Domme does.  I push edges without apology when I see a wrong that needs righted. I will  win this lawsuit and give our side a victory for once.  And there are all kinds of brilliant people helping me move toward that end.

I understand that there are some Dommes that might rather see me lose.  Afterall, they started this debacle by writing to the authorities about me years ago hoping they would get me in trouble. When given lemons by them, I spin them into lemonade.  It's a matter of mindset and my refusal to accept their small-mindedness as truth.

The only "abusive" behavior in this whole debacle is that Miz Suz published my home address, full legal name, birthdate, and private unlisted phone number on the internet and shared it widely.  There are lines of right and wrong that should never be crossed.  We should never snitch to the authorities or others in a way that is hostile. She crossed that line and proof of its crossing is documented. As you can see from these posts the ladies do seem to have quite a bit of hostiilty toward me. You don't see me stirring up trouble for people where they live, nor will you ever. I simply could not live with myself if I did.

As a Domme, I have sponsored many large events, weekly public workshops, private dungeon parties, and even a large national juried erotic art ball which received rave reviews in mainstream press.  In these experiences, I found sometimes that people do not flow in the exact way I want or in the exact way I think is appropriate.  When I encounter this, I practice something known as tolerance.  The most accomplished people I know all do this.  That explains why the projects I produce are so well-attended and why I have so much support.

TOLERANCE is what will lead our community to enjoy the same freedoms that the gay community finally enjoys.  They don't get their parties on Navy Pier or The Chicago Theater by constant infighting, snitching, and backstabbing. They have finally arrived through years of careful networking, activism, and the practice of tolerance among each other. At one time they experienced similar problems that our community now faces in terms of infighting.  This is documented in the book "After The Ball, How America will Overcome Its Fear & Hatred of Gays in The 1990's", which was outlined by two Harvard graduates.

The biggest problem with our community is how nasty people are to each other.  I learned that early on with Miz Suz.  I've learned it from others.  I've seen people call authorities and ruin events, even causing them to be cancelled especially in Chicago. I aligned myself with the Arts community because they do not do that to each other.  I've seen much from our community that is contrary to the tolerance and unity which is needed to ultimately lead us into the civil victories we deserve. We're easy to hurt when we are divided.  Sadily it typically starts with femdoms who do not have their egos in check; women who would rather hurt than nuture our community. These women will ultimately be placed outside of the circle.

I am rather tired of this senseless fighting. I could make up things about them if I wanted and run around the internet finding people to colloborate what I say is true if I wanted. It is pointless and does not advance any worthy goal.  And further, the brilliant people around me are above it.

I do keep these boards informed of the updates on my legal case because I intend to deliever a victory for us and I think it is important that people see the steps I take to do it.  I also want to inspire activism in others.  Activism requires courage and it is not done by hiding on the internet.

I fully recognize that I  am not likely to  be popular with mean-spirited people like Miz Suz who would rather hurt a person over jealousy than do the right thing for our community. However, I will prevail.  I always do.  The brilliance Ms. D'Arcy sees in me is really just a reflection of the brilliance of those with whom I surround myself.  I do not do any of this alone and never have.






MaitresseMissAnn -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/19/2006 6:03:23 PM)

quote:

Tis a shame that she was apparently too drunk to remember being at your space, much less meeting you.  The ethics of said individual would certainly be called into question if she didn't recognize that bringing an uninvited guest to a private party is a no-no, much less doing what she was doing in a gated community.  That simply deserves a DUH.


To the contrary, I remember the entire evening of the summer of 2002, nearly 4 years ago.  It is rather tacky to negatively comment on people or a party you did not attend.

Ms. D'Arcy was told in advance I was bringing a guest and his name was provided to her in advance in writing.  He was a regular submissive of mine and someone I frequently stayed with in the Gold Coast when I visited Chicago.  He is a lovely person.

Ms. D'Arcy's space was located in an industrial part of the city and no place I would walk around in alone during the day, let alone at night. She accepted my guest's name in advance for her guest list.  I am only now learning that she had no regard for my safety or personal comfort and expected me to go there unescorted. I am glad I did go with an escort inspite of what she says about this now (4 years later) because my guest and I had to wait outside for several minutes in the dark before we were let inside.

I had drinks earlier at dinner, but did not play in her space, nor did I interupt scenes as she infers.  I felt out of place because my companion and I were both dressed in business attire and way over-dressed compared to the other guests. I've always been taught that being well-dressed is a sign of respect.  When people are well-dressed at my functions, I take them aside and thank them for it.  I suspect now that perhaps our attire was intimidating to her for some reason. I regret going, although her collection of dungeon furnishings is truly astounding and was cool to see.   It was kind of  like a creepy museum and I liked the physical environment even though it could have used a good cleaning.

As a hostess myself of many events, ranging in size from 1000 guests to private D/s parties in my home, I would never criticize a guest's behavior in a public forum.  Nor would I ever criticize a guest for bringing a companion, especially if that companion offered a measure of safety to my guest.  Making guests comfortable (and safe) should be paramount to any astute hostess.

People love coming to my parties because they know my friends are not pretentious, we go with the flow there, and everyone knows they are safe to express themselves as individuals without judgement...even if that expression is different than my own. A great example of such a party is the monthly Wicked Wednesday fetish parties I co-sponsor here in Indy.  Everyone is welcome and has become one of the most popular events in town and is co-sponsored by our local news alternative, NUVO.  More info about the monthly party can be found on my site.











LTRsubNW -> RE: Indianapolis Dominatrix MISS ANN on Political Talk Radio (6/25/2006 10:45:59 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MaitresseMissAnn

A little bit of history here... She hated me because a boyfriend of hers was a good friend of mine... 


I am constantly amazed that this still runs on year after year with no purpose or gain.

For those not in the know, I am that guy. MizSuz and I weren't boyfriend and girlfriend.  Both of us are old enough that monikers such as those were long ago outdated. 

I met Anne online many years ago, found her to be intelligent, business savvy and within a year or so invited her as a friend to come visit me.

During that period, MizSuz and I got to know each other and I found her to be singularly the most extraordinary women I've ever known and to this day feel the same about her as I did then, and if it's possible, even more so.  If I'm ever lucky enough at any point in my life to find and marry someone even half as remarkable as MizSuz, I'll consider my life fulfilled.

It became very obvious to me that MizSuz was the type of woman I'd very much prefer to spend the rest of my life with and I pursued her.  With vigor. 

Unfortunately, due to my bumbling, she later came to a vastly different conclusion.

Events occurred, I made some rather catastrophic mistakes (such as honoring my previous agreement to allow Anne to come visit me, which I can now see in hindsight would be highly inappropriate when {the sub} might be up for consideration) in my pursuit, things fell apart and I panic'd and asked Anne for advice (from a Dommes perspective).  I asked that she might talk to Suz on my behalf.

I would have tried anything to restore what I felt then and still feel to this day were the beginnings of a spectacular relationship with an even more spectacular woman.  As happens in so many cases where a man flounders, he tries all the harder, making the tsunami of effort only drown his efforts all the more.

What was well intentioned turned into a hornets nest of epic proportion that became so much larger than it ever should have, largely because of me.

Suz was never jealous of anyone, since she knew at all times where my feelings lie.  What grew out of a small thing, cascaded in to years of backbiting and catcalling, all unnecessarily.

I've seen various logs to know without question that Suz didn't contact any authorities (and I have a fair idea who did).  I've also seen specific comments from both of you (and websites) to know all too well that both of your tinder is constantly dry.  I really wish the both of you could find a way to stop carrying matches.

Anne, I hope you can find a way to accept my word on this and move on from it.  No one gains from any of this and all parties connected get sullied.  I've read your website and I hope your legal issues come to a conclusion soon.

Suz, I'm very sorry this continues, and I wish I had the capacity to stop it.  I've tried for a very long time.



candleTC -> RE: Indianapolis Dominatrix MISS ANN on Political Talk Radio (6/25/2006 2:27:03 PM)

girls, girls, GIRLS!!! Back to your corners, please!

This is proof positive to me ( and i am sure many others ) that sometimes, the adage " oh, it's only online, don't let it bother you", is just not always the case.  This is a case of online gone to real time of catastrophic proportions.

Years and years of constant banter, bicker and backbiting have not only taken a toll on your real life personal situations, but your also business endeavors.  What good has possibly come of this? Outing one another, drawing attention to each other in a world where most of the general public view us as sexual deviants anyway, has done nothing for the lifestyle as a whole.  I am apalled at this behavior.  Now, me being a "switch" will definately not get me the recognition or the respect, however, i have walked around in your thigh high boots in the professional realm for quite a few years.  I was highly respected as a Professional Domme in my community.  My client base was vast and they were sad to see me go. 
With that being said, I must say, I have never seen such unprofessional attitudes and lack of respect from one Domme to another... not only that, dragging a sub into the mix of your own personal vendettas.  He has very much taken responsibility for most, if not all of this.  This should no longer, ( if it ever really should have ) lay on his shoulders.  As Dominants, RULE NUMBER ONE, take responsibility for Our own actions.  At some point, it will be wise ( I would think ) to lay down the swords and wave the white flag.  It could only do wonders for Your business as a whole. 

With so much publication on the subject, I personally, couldn't imagine why any sub/slave would want to seek either one of You out .. there is no accountability.  Good luck with that.

Now, with all this being said, I have to jump to the "Dommes" that are allowing this thread to perpetuate into what it has in this Forum.  Picking sides, lashing out, continuing the backbiting... HIGHLY unprofessional.  Ya know, it seems that even 10 years ago, Dommes from all over used to band together and * gasp * support one another.  Even when the competition is great, seems we all had the same common goal.. What has happened.  For someone like Myself, who is considering re-entering the magical realm of possibilities into the Professional world, this is a huge turn off.. and quite frankly, scary.  Leaves me to re-think Our ( Master and Mine) decision of the whole thing. 

Good luck to each of You... however, this needs to be stopped... it's ridiculous.

I'm done with this... I am not here to continue to throw gas on a fire that should have burned out years ago, however, I am here to state what I see to be the obvious, from a totally unbiased view. 

Be well..... ( or something )

Beth
*leaves this as a pondering*
Thoughts are like arrows: once released, they strike their mark. Guard them well or one day you may be your own victim. - Navajo Proverb



MizSuz -> RE: Indianapolis Dominatrix MISS ANN on Political Talk Radio (6/25/2006 7:52:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LTRsubNW

Suz, I'm very sorry this continues, and I wish I had the capacity to stop it.  I've tried for a very long time.



I know you have but I appreciate your stepping up, yet again.  I value your attempts to not be hurtful whether I think them misplaced or not.  I hate that it continues and that, still, you are used wrongly as the crux.  We, apparently among others, have long tried to ignore and not rise to it, but still it persists.  It's been about 4 years for this drama now, hasn't it?  Just when we think it's moved on to greener pastures it's back again.

We'll always be more than friends regardless of the life situations, and that's something no one can touch.  I wish you only happiness, I know you know it.



happypervert -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/26/2006 5:27:53 AM)

quote:

And she is right about one thing.  I know how to spin a message.

That's a polite way to put it.

In cases like this where we see one person's account of reality be so different from everyone else's, I wonder if the one's head is miswired so she can shape her memory to suits her purpose at the time or if she is just a bald faced liar. You go ahead and call it spin if you want.

Oh, and kudos to Sdarcy for the way she artfully asked questions to get you blabbing and eventually expose this as a PR stunt along with your backstabbing. Well done!




NakedOnMyChain -> RE: Indianapolis Dominatrix MISS ANN on Political Talk Radio (6/26/2006 11:49:01 AM)

Fights like these are exactly why I keep myself to myself and very close friends where the lifestyle is concerned.  I've seen too much of this constant bickering, despite what actual wrong was done, to take part in my local BDSM community (which is really just an offshoot of Indy's.)

I wish things were different, but you know the old adage about wishing in one hand and spitting in the other.



whereismyone -> RE: Indianapolis Dominatrix MISS ANN on Political Talk Radio (6/26/2006 12:09:45 PM)

Its such a lovely day. The birds are singing, the sun is shining, flowers are blooming; just lovely. *Pointedly ignoring pissing contest that goes no where. Suggesting the ladies in question take it outside, whip out their respective strap-ons and settle it once and for all*



LTRsubNW -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/26/2006 3:40:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: happypervert
In cases like this where we see one person's account of reality be so different from everyone else's, I wonder if the one's head is miswired so she can shape her memory to suits her purpose...


Ya know, none of this is necessary.  Both of these people are good people.  I respect both of them for different reasons.

I think I'm a pretty good person too, but I know for a fact I can almost instantaneously give you about 19 names and phone numbers of people who think I'm Satans spawn.

Some, I'm sure, could even prove the veracity of that claim.

But my Mom loves me...and that's all that matters.

It would appear that they have dropped it.

(Why don't you?).



Noah -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/26/2006 4:20:13 PM)


As opposed to a few of the posters here I'm grateful for the depositions from each side.

I go a lot by smell. One side of this discussion just reeks.

If you can't tell quickly and clearly which one that is I reccomend being more than usually careful in your approaches to any potential partner, professional or otherwise.



LTRsubNW -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/26/2006 5:01:00 PM)

I'm not saying it's rocket science.  I'm just saying other people have to swim here.



MaitresseMissAnn -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (6/28/2006 12:15:55 AM)

quote:

MIZ SUZ SAYS: "This will be the ONLY response I will make to these accusations on this forum."

Ownership of Words, Suz.

And I agree that Suz is an extraordinary woman in many ways.  I'd like to see her get over her insecurity.  And me too, for that matter.   I've learned a lot from all of this.

Stay Tuned!



Satindomme -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (7/8/2006 10:57:10 AM)

My name is Madra.  This is my real first name.  I have been a supporter of the bdsm lifestyle for 13 years here in Chicago.  I am or have been a member of Leather Rose, Galleria Domain, CDG (which was the original bdsm support organization in Chicago with a history second only to Eulenspiegel) and Quest.  Most of the leaders of the Chicago bdsm community know me personally and have for years.  I have never accepted funds for domination yet several of my friends are or have been lifestyle pro-dommes.  I am a lifestyle naturally dominant woman.  I "top" men who I am romantically involved with.  I have been accused in AOL chat rooms by "Miss Ann" of doing men in sleezy hotel rooms for money since 2002.  On 2/20/2003 in the AOL chat room, RealSubMen, my real name, address and phone number was posted by Ann with the help of her on line "sissy", screen name at that time, SissyinPantys.  Ann has alienated most of the genuine bdsm community with her arrogance, egotism and narcissism.  Her only interest in this lifestyle is and always has been monetary. She demonstrated her lack of knowledge daily in AOL chat rooms for years.  She did not even know how to clean dungeon apparatus.  She bragged that her service was not sexual with a strap on in plain view in one of her pictures.  She paraded a latex pet on a leash through a public park in daylight in plain view of children (pictured on her web site)  Note: this was not a barracaded staged photo shoot.  She always demonstrated disdain for anyone overweight (seeing a recent photo of her made me chuckle).  She preys on men who are "newbies".  They try to find their way in the bdsm community and unfortunately stumble upon her.  Several may have been injured, but as a rule, men who are injured fail to make police reports for fear of "outting" and embarrassment. "Buyer beware!"  I wish the city of Indy success in its' case against Melissa (Ann).  Anyone arrogant enough to run an adult business on a residential street within yards of a primary school and church without a license deserves to be prosecuted.  I wonder if Melissa is claiming the funds men are donating to her defense as income????

Madra, Mistress Madra to some, the Satindomme

[Mod Note:  email addresses and needless quoting removed]



Sdarcy -> RE: Spin Spin Spin - Round and Round and Round (7/8/2006 10:01:47 PM)

And I will happily vouch for Ms. Madra's sincere devotion to and support of the Chicago scene as well as her strength of character. She's one of the only people I know who never causes trouble, gossips, manipulates, or does anything but be genuinely and enthusiastically Madra! Hermit that I am, we don't see each other often but it's always a pleasure to run into her at an event or club.

Warm regards,

Ms. Susanne D'Arcy



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