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RE: possessiveness? - 7/30/2011 3:35:37 AM

sirsholly

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quote:

is "my" an off-limits word to you? has it ever been?

I am thinking in the context of "my" husband.

Sure...he is "a" husband...but he is also mine. I have as much to say about the relationship as he does, irregardless of my orientation as a submissive and his as a Dominant.

Yes, he is mine, as i am his. We chose each other and it seems disrespectful to the relationship not to use "my" or "mine" in relation to each other.

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Post #: 41

RE: possessiveness? - 7/30/2011 9:25:28 AM

kiwisub12

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In my first bdsm relationship, i referred to my Sir as "my Sir". He initially had issues with the idea that i owned him - but i pointed out that if he owned me, then i had a propriatory interest in him, ergo, he was mine.lol.

He got used to it after a while. And since i was not overly possessive, it didn't bother him.

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Post #: 42

RE: possessiveness? - 7/31/2011 2:36:31 AM

Focus50

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From: Newcastle, Australia
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

Yes, he is mine, as i am his. We chose each other and it seems disrespectful to the relationship not to use "my" or "mine" in relation to each other.

Which is how it is with my submissive within the relationship. But the fact remains that "my" is a possessive pronoun, it does imply a personal ownership and why my sub is restricted from using it with outsiders when referring to me.

Considering all the semantics played out in this thread over such a simple concept of what "my" implies, I'm not especially surprised no-one's gone for the dictionary. Or maybe they have....

Anyway, mine says (somewhat oddly) that "my" is the "possessive form of I".

Focus.

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Post #: 43

RE: possessiveness? - 7/31/2011 3:04:19 AM

DeviantlyD

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From: Hawai`i
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

Yes, he is mine, as i am his. We chose each other and it seems disrespectful to the relationship not to use "my" or "mine" in relation to each other.

Which is how it is with my submissive within the relationship. But the fact remains that "my" is a possessive pronoun, it does imply a personal ownership and why my sub is restricted from using it with outsiders when referring to me.

Considering all the semantics played out in this thread over such a simple concept of what "my" implies, I'm not especially surprised no-one's gone for the dictionary. Or maybe they have....

Anyway, mine says (somewhat oddly) that "my" is the "possessive form of I".

Focus.

Okay, here ya go.

my |mī|
possessive adjective
1 belonging to or associated with the speaker : my name is John | my friend.
• informal used with a name to refer to a member of the speaker's family : my Francine won top honors in the science fair.
• used with forms of address in affectionate, sympathetic, humorous, or patronizing contexts : my dear boy | my poor baby.
2 used in various expressions of surprise : my goodness! | oh my!

And before anyone gets hung up on the "possessive adjective" descriptor, that's "possessive" in the grammatical sense, not otherwise.

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Post #: 44

RE: possessiveness? - 7/31/2011 6:18:07 AM

LillyBoPeep

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here's a snippet on semantics from wikipedia -

quote:

Semantics For possessive adjectives as elsewhere, the genitive does not always indicate strict possession, but rather a general sense of belonging or close identification with. Consider the following examples:
my mother or my people
Here, a person does not own his or her mother, but rather has a close relationship with her. The same applies to my people, which means people I am closely associated with or people I identify with.
his train (as in "If Bob doesn't get to the station in ten minutes he's going to miss his train")
Here, Bob most likely does not own the train and instead his train means the train Bob plans to travel on.
my CD (as in "The kids are enjoying my CD")
my CD could refer to a CD that I own, a CD owned by someone else but with music that I recorded as an artist, a CD that I have just given to someone here as a gift, or one with some other relation to me that would be identifiable in the context.

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Post #: 45

RE: possessiveness? - 7/31/2011 3:55:31 PM

Focus50

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So are you pair of bush lawyers claiming "my" doesn't indicate possession or ownership in any context, whatsoever?

As far as relationships are concerned, I don't own my brother, sister, mum or dad; or my friends, neighbours, workmates or fellow bus travellers. But as far as my D/s dynamics work, YES, I do own my submissive for as long as we both choose to be together.

Now Lilly, which context are we at CM to consider your OP?

Focus.

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Post #: 46

RE: possessiveness? - 7/31/2011 10:03:20 PM

HannahLynHeather

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oh for fuck's sakes, are you really so fucking unsure of yourself that you are afraid people will mistake you for the submissive if she dares use the word "my" in front of other people?

as much as it must suck to be you, if you really honestly believe even half of the stupid shit you post, it just has to suck so much worse to be your submissive.

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Post #: 47

RE: possessiveness? - 8/1/2011 2:37:05 AM

Focus50

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And coming live from the comfort, security and anonymity of its own out-house, the latest diatribe from CM's resident trash talking gutter-mouth.

Over-compensating to the max, as usual....

*yawn*

Focus.

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Post #: 48

RE: possessiveness? - 8/1/2011 10:47:59 AM

AngelControlsU

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I really have to agree with Hannah on this one and I do not think that the word ‘My” necessarily implies ownership, yes if I say “that is My dog” or “My pencil” or “My dick in your ass” you obviously understand that I own those things, hence the word “My” but when I say “My teacher” “My brother” “I am running late to catch My bus” no one would hear that and think “wow she owns her own bus” it is absolutely ridiculous to not allow your sub to refer to you as ‘My Master” or My Mistress, Or My Sir or that ever the fuck you like to be called. Further more I think it implies a exclusive dynamic, by saying “My Master” I now know that she is submissive to only you and not just anyone who claims to be the Master of the day, not all people who play in BDSM are exclusive or ongoing, a sub might call someone Master while they are playing and the next day go back to there vanilla life no longer thinking of that Master as her’s or having any ownership over her. If you are worried about other people thinking she is the real owner because she called you “My Sir” then you need to build up your self confidence, it doesn’t sound very dominant to me either. What if she is talking to other slaves about their Masters and need to clarify between You and other’s Masters? Should she then say “the Master who owns me” every fucking time? Can we say INSUCURITY? When I own a slave I am most certainly Their Master and I would expect then to refer to me as “my Mistress” when speaking of me to others. If anyone was stupid enough to think that they own me because they used the word “MY” then they are obviously a fucking idiot and they can just ad that to the long list of other moronic things I am sure they think.

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Post #: 49

RE: possessiveness? - 8/1/2011 2:27:57 PM

Focus50

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Wow!

<shakes head in utter astonishment>

Now to prise my jaw back up off the floor.....

Focus.

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Post #: 50