impishlilhellcat -> RE: Spanking (7/29/2011 12:37:24 PM)
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ORIGINAL: MasterViper11 There are different types of Masters... Some, that condone spanking once in a while. Some that never spank. And some, simply spank their sub/slave for no given reason. (Just because it is a 'Dom' thing to do') I would like to, in my opinion, sum up all the valid reasons spanking should be carried out; Firstly; Punishment. This is when the spanking is carried out harshly, aggressively, and is persistent. It must not; be soft, teasing or erotic in any way! As this will give them the wrong idea, and help nothing. Depending on how much your sub/slave has angered you, toys such as paddles can be used to aid the pain. Discipline. As I have noticed many, will get confused between Punishment and Discipline. Punishment is to make the sub/slave aware that they have done something you do not like, where as Discipline, prevents this behavior. I have experienced other Masters, who did not carry out this ritual of a scheduled spank. Their sub/slave lost sight of their Master having complete control over them, and therefore, through no fault of their own, became slightly Dominant; decided they needed a more Dominating Master, and either left them or became a Switch. Which is why it is important to stay consistent. For example; Giving your sub/slave a spanking session every night before bed, Or maybe every morning before leaving for work. This way, it becomes a routine (preferably daily)and not only reassures her You are in charge, but more importantly, further strengthens your relationship. Before Sex Sex will get anyone excited. In fact; so excited, that sometimes a sub/slave will forget they are actually a sub/slave, and will advance to take control. In order to prevent this behavior, a firm spank, right before sex, reminds them that you are in charge, and not to assume otherwise. (Does not apply to Switches) For fun The key to any successful relationship (BDSM or not) is the bond. And creating that bond, relies on much more than just sex. It has to be fun. However, when I say fun, keeping in mind, that the 'fun' may not, in any way, put your sub/slave in control, or you under hers. Even if it is just for a good laugh. As it is very possible for her to enjoy the feeling of being Dominant, and then she may Switch. Which is why soft spanking is ideal to create that bond. As you are still in control, and she is still under your command; but no harm is being done, and allows for a relaxed atmosphere. I'd also like to add, that I did state this was purely My opinion. I do not intend for this forum to be a guideline of some sort. If you feel what I said is wrong, then feel free to express it. [image]local://upfiles/1252339/DA825E5DFACA4011AF9E31052FB5AE42.jpg[/image] I don't need physical punishment to remind me of my submission. A look or a word often snap me right in place. I enjoy the pain aspect of my D/s relationships, but it doesn't define the whole relationship or why or who I choose to submit too. Someone in my head is far more dangerous and exotic to me than someone running a paddle against my butt. As a submissive the last thing I want to do is to control my Dominant during sex or otherwise. Nor do I want to disappoint him in any way if I can avoid it. It's counteractive to my submission and causes nothing, but conflict on my part to play two roles.
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