quote:

ORIGINAL: Hisprettybaby

Wow, lots of good ideas on this thread. Some I've even done myself.

Marisol, I peeked at your profile and you have a really neat cat there. A yellow tabby it looks like.

quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious
FR

Also, check out Amazon. Their Health & Personal Care section has some...interesting (and cheap!) products in it. :D

quote:

ORIGINAL: MaamJay
I am plus size too, and I did a WHOLE lot of bdsm before I invested in a corset! By then I knew people in My local scene who made them at reasonable prices and I got them one at a time as I could afford them. The first was especially cheap as it had been made for someone else who changed their mind about buying it ... and it was purple too! They are nice to wear out to parties etc and I do feel sexy in them BUT I find I can only do some forms of play in them without finding it too restricting. Like flogging and spanking good ... but attaching ankle cuffs and spreader bar to a sub NO GOOD as if I managed to get down that low wearing one ... I'd never get back up! So for play at home, I'd rather just wear some good lingerie (I have some lovely floaty long nightgowns with lacy bra-like tops), or maybe a low-ish cut top (the assets always turn the guys on!), and a split-sided skirt made of nice slippery smooth fabric.

As everyone else has said, LOADS of great cheap pervertables available from other stores, crops etc I second the idea of the equestrian store. They also sell that self-sticky bandage (for horses) in great colours which makes quite good bondage tape and a lot cheaper than the official stuff. Pet stores awesome for cheaper collars, leashes etc ... short check chains (sometimes called choker chains) work quite well clipped to collars used as ankle cuffs to make shackles. Kitten collars with bells attached to wrists or ankles can be fun, especially if you give the sub a task or a position and tell them you don't want to hear the bells ring (or they will get a whack every time they do etc!). Be creative! One of the most fun scenes ever was when I tied a sub's hands behind their back ... then told them to put away the shopping!

I agree with others here, refreshing to see a new Domme who is asking questions AND listening to the answers, willing to learn. Ask away Marisol!

Ma'am Jay aka violet[A]

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Unless your measurements are standard, I'd got for underbust corsets, I got a few overbust ones, the only ones that really fit are made to measure, with an underbust one, you don't have that problem.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Black leather show crops cost more. But you can pick up a neon green or bright red one for less. And they're easier to see when you're packing up.

Since you're 18, you may still be either living at home or have a roommate. I'd invest first in a numbered padlock and a cheap suitcase to keep all your stuff in. Numbered because keys are like socks in the dryer, they walk on their own!

quote:

ORIGINAL: StrikingBeauty
As LadyPact says, a collection of good quality equipment is something that you build over many years. While pervertables are nice and can fill needed niches, it IS a good idea to save up some dollars and on occasion buy a good piece, like a well made flogger or an exotic wood paddle or the like.

After 10 years, those are the pieces I still use, and I've replaced all the 'cheap but fun' early stuff I've had with better quality. But it's a process...you buy good piece, learn how to use it properly, become proficient, think about buying another piece.

I have to admit....I'm not big on investing in expensive kink wardrobe. Nice lingerie, the little black dress with a pair of heels, etc, work just fine. And again - that's a matter of keeping your eyes open, catching a good sale, etc.

There are guys out there who expect that if you call yourself a Domme, that means you have all the equipment and wardrobe of a successful Prodomme of many years, but are going to make that available for them to play with at no cost or effort on their part. Avoid men like that. They don't want a woman; they want a fetish delivery service.

The "nice boy" (for lack of a better term) male sub that you DO want to spend time with is realistic, willing to grow and learn with you, and will expect that he's going to contribute to "the collection" just as much as you are.

quote:

I'm not going to get into the semantic issue of dominant v. top here... but part of dominance is controlling YOURSELF. Work on yourself, study, get a job, pay your bills on time, be an EXAMPLE that others will want to follow. This does not require wealth, just a sense of personal responsibility. I am a dominant everywere, it's how I carry myself, and how I live my life. It has NOTHING to do with playing and everything to do with leadership.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

Hijack just to say... It's good to see you Lady Angelika!!!

quote:

ORIGINAL: Marisol

Yeah, that's the problem I'd been finding with men contacting me here. They say "We don't want a prodomme", but then they expect an 18 year old, college student who works as a childcare provider to be able to afford all these toys. Just what are they thinking?!

quote:

ORIGINAL: JWriter

You know what? There is a great alternative to being a financial domme or being without toys. (Right here it may not be clear as to who gets to keep those toys and lingerie, but unless he likes wearing lingerie, I would assume it is you.) It's that after you get to know someone, in a nice few public meetings, you casually mention, "Gee, I'd love to take you .." wherever it is .." and, crop your...." whatever you'd like to crop "and, give you some welts to remember me by, but, unfortunately, I just don't seem to have a crop."  (That is manipulative and promising an outcome if he only takes the bait to go be a... what did you call it... a submissive and what was it.. do what a submissive does... like buy things for play. I say manipulative because of your last sentence. 'I just don't seem to have a crop.') Or, "Let's go get some lingerie for me to tease you by wearing."

There is no reason to feel bad, because you are allowing a man who wants to buy you things to buy you things that are going to please the both of you. (No reason to feel bad if someone buys you something, but what about you enticing him to buy you things? {Just a note.. a gift isn't something you ask for unless it is Christmas, you're sitting on Santa's lap and he asks you what you want.} That is honest? That isn't manipulative? If it is honest in your opinion and no reason to feel bad... you and I live different ethics and surely have a different view/opinion on many things. Now... lets address the gift thing again. A gift is something you keep, so therefore, this proves my first comment and who gets the goods. Another point... who says that what a submissive does, is buy you things?)

quote:

{Just a note.. a gift isn't something you ask for unless it is Christmas, you're sitting on Santa's lap and he asks you what you want.}

quote:

ORIGINAL: JWriter

It would be ever so lovely if some of the women on this forum would stop adding to my words, twisting them, and, then lightly dipping them in bullshit before trying to serve them back to me.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Tantriqu

Dollar store sleep masks, leashes, collars, dog bowls and costumes, stationery store binder clamps, Army/Navy [how I miss that store!] snake bite kits, lanyards, rope, and grommets for make-your-own restraints and leatherwear, Salvation Army thrift store silk ties [ugly colours, but as above, who cares what they're bound to the bedposts by if they're wearing a dollar store sleep mask?], and my prized bargain, a long narrow 80's mirror in tubular steel: now imagine a good man on his hands and knees over it: I can watch his face and other reactions as I do things to him with my more expensive toys!