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UniqueRaven -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 9:24:47 AM)
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(Ignoring the whole "subbie" banter) giggles
Ok, for me, what attracts me to a profile are a few things:
1. First I look at photos, age, height, weight, and location. I'm not interested in over 46, or under 35. He must be at leaste 6' (I'm tall)...5'11" maybe if everything else is awesome...and I prefer over 200 lbs (but not obese). Under 190 is pretty much a no-go. I like him physically larger than me, it's important to me. Photos, I will see if I find him attractive (there's a broad range for that), does he take care of himself, and what does his home look like (you'd be surprised how many men have photos of themselves in an absolute pigsty). If he doesn't have a photo, I'll need him to send one pretty quickly. Location...I will relocate, but not to Montana, North Dakota, or Utah. etc. For my career (if I am to be working) I need to stick to larger cities, and I need culture, so places like NY, DC, Chicago, SanFran, yes. Maybe places like Atlanta or Charlotte or Orlando...depending upon the next 3 items, below...but definitely not Oklahoma! (laughs)
2. If that's all in order, then next I look at spelling and grammar - are the sentences written well? Are there more than a few spelling mistakes? (we all make some but a lot makes me think he doesn't even know spellcheck exists) Does he type in textspeak? (A personal pet peeve) And does he make obvious errors, like calling himself a "dominate" instead of "dominant?"
3. If the spelling and all that is there, I move to content. Does he show that he has a firm grip on the reality of D/s or M/s as a relationship - even if he just wants a casual one? Or is it full of fantasy? I read one earlier today where it said his slave would only be allowed to speak when spoken to, and must phrase everything she says as "Master" [sentence] "Master" - as in, "Master, your eggs are ready, Master." Ummm, not sustainable (he also said his slave will be deloused regularly...what?). Or the Dom who said his slave will wear heels and stockings 24/7. These sorts of things tell me he is looking for something entirely different from me.
4. After that, if his writing shows he is looking for something real, then I read for compatibility...if what he says is compatible with what I seek and offer. And that's just like any other relationship, just with M/s or D/s structure.
In regards to relocation, it's just like any other relationship. Personally I won't speak with someone long distance if he's not able/ready to meet in pretty short order...long distance doesn't work for me. We need to be able to spend time together, weekends, etc., and when the timing is right then I would move...after I was confident all was in place and that the situation would "work" for us both. I relocated to be with my ex in NYC, and that was after about five months of getting to know each other. It was one of the best decisions I ever made, and I would do it again...but not casually.
OH, but Tiffany's jewelry will make me chuck all of the above out the window...jus' sayin'...giggles [:D]
Good luck to you on the site - and don't take anyone too seriously, everyone has different opinions and ways of interacting, and most are here just for fun. [:)]
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