RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire?

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VaguelyCurious -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 4:28:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ElderKnight It should also be very obvious I'm new because I can't figure out how to do the quote/respond thing. I'm laughing at myself as I'm typing this. This is a tutorial on quotes.

DeviantlyD -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 4:35:10 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: 0ldhen A friend of mine(everybody say we miss ya FukinTroll) once commented that there should be a 72 hour death watch for new posters. A period of 72 hours during which they could read the forums but not post. This would allow the newbies to take time to observe who is who, how they talk and relate. I disagree. quote: ORIGINAL: ElderKnight Hello to you all, and I have a question(s) for you subbies and slaves. Of course I know there is a difference, but these will center around a 24/7 relationship. This is my first post, and I figure the charlatans don't view the posts and I can get a somewhat straight answer. 1) RELOCATION - What do you look for that would motivate you to relocate for a Dom/Master and how much time do you think is reasonable talking with them before you do? 2) PROFILE - What is it that you look for in a profile that catches your eye, intrigues you and you find yourself wanting to know more about a particular Dom/Master? I may have more pending what comes out of this, and appreciate the input. L. The answers to these questions could be as varied as the number of submissives on this site. For #1, personally that is impossible to answer. I would only relocate if I felt reasonably certain that the man I was relocating for was someone I was going to be with for a long time. That would involve meeting that person, having a long distance relationship with that person and so on. For someone else, they may be willing to relocate without meeting. As for #2, it's a very subjective question and generally speaking, I am doubtful as to the existence of a one-size-fits-all response. My suggestion? If you know who you are looking for, tailor your profile to appeal to the person you believe her to be. However, don't discount serendipity. I've often heard people say something along the lines of "I thought I wanted this, but I ended up with that and I couldn't be happier."

hausboy -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 4:51:25 PM)
Given that I've had two girlfriends (one who became my wife/Domme, er, now ex-wife ex-Domme) relocate across the country for me, I can't say that I would not relocate for the right person, but I don't advertise that fact. it is gonna take a LOT...I mean, a LOT, to get me to relocate for a Domme. While I absolutely deplore the city where I currently pay taxes, the fact is my aging parents live here, my career is flourishing here and I own a house here. So that Domme will have to truly be something special--we're talking "THE ONE AND ONLY ONE" for me to pull up stakes and move to a new city where I have to start over from scratch. Unless....she is remarkably wealthy such that I no longer have to work another day in my life for a paycheck and has managed to so completely capture my heart and trust.... then I'll plant the "for sale" sign in the front yard myself!

Kaliko -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 6:03:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sexyred1 As for relocation. It irks me when Dominants write me "can you relocate" in their first email to me. Really?? My life is as equally important as theirs is. Instead of waiting for the APPROPRIATE time to discuss relocation, for either party, such as..uh, you know when you are in a RELATIONSHIP, then and only then does relocation come into play. That wouldn't irk me. I know that I don't want to get involved in another long-distance relationship, and so I would want to know up front if someone who lives far from me is able to relocate. If not, I wouldn't even bother getting to know that person, lest I fall in love (again) and be brokenhearted (again). I can see how it can be seen from a different perspective, but to me it seems like a logistical question. In my case, I cannot move. I cannot relocate. So my question to a long-distance would-be Dominant would be, are you able to relocate? If the answer is no, why even get to know that person?

JanahX -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 6:39:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ElderKnight Nope, but seems my sarcastic sense of humor go over like a lead baloon on this site. Why is everyone so serious and rigid? Did you happen to see the thread on anal plugs?

BeautyDebased -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 7:28:39 PM)
Greetings Elder, Primarily I think, just be yourself, have some funny and interesting photo's and above all, patience. As for the word subbie...it's a word, if someone gets so offended by a simple word then I wouldn't waste my time with them, I'd laugh at them because it's not meant to be taken all serious all the time, it's about fun too and no, regardless of what they may say there's not much of that on these forums which is why I'm rarely here unless a post in as the collar turns captures my eye. What I see most of is a"clique" of people who sit around telling opinions and attacking some who don't agree with them, not all forum members are like this but sadly I know many people who have been attacked here for a simple slip...really? who cares lol. I'd not have an avid forum member as someone I'd consider when I was looking, collared now but I'd have to wonder, why are you there listening to all these opinions of others rather than actually living the lifestyle yourself with a sub or slave....seems silly to me, I was attacked here once for putting smiles up so who knows, though I do wish you luck. Time to amscray from here and go back to actually living the life, my Master is home from work today [:)] Beauty.

BeautyDebased -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 7:47:42 PM)
I decided to add this after speaking to my Master about this thread and what He had to say, There seems to be so many angry submissves here, "Why should I have to relocate" .....well as my Master so simply put it, you, don't have to do a thing, if you want to wait where you are and are happy to stick to being stubborn while hoping someone closer to you will come along. However, it's not a demand a Dom makes, but an offer, if a sub should come along who really likes this guy she might love the idea of moving to him, it's not an invitation or demand that every sub reading his profile should relocate and if it's not for you then fine, but for some it might be, might be just what they were seeking, a little less of knocking people down without any prior thought as to what their words may actually mean could work wonders here. It's sad really and it makes people in the lifestyle look bad too, a simple "Well, Id rather not relocate to a Dom because I'm happy where I live though if it was the right Dom I may consider it" or "I'm not interested in relocation at all" would suffice, some manners also go a long way, again goodluck to the poster, I do suggest just talking to real subs who are seeking someone and say they are willing to relocate, you will likely get a better and more heartfelt response. mittens and her Master.

Kaliko -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 7:48:11 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BeautyDebased Greetings Elder, I'd not have a forum member as someone I'd consider when I was looking, collared now but I'd have to wonder, why are you there listening to all these opinions of others rather than actually living the lifestyle yourself with a sub or slave....seems silly to me, I was attacked here once for putting smiles up so who knows, though I do wish you luck. Time to amscray from here and go back to actually living the life, my Master is home from work today [:)] Wow. You're kind of a bitch. And I rarely, rarely say anything like that. But wow. I can see why you may have had some troubles here in the past. Judge much? I would post an argument as to why, but I'm sure you're too busy actually living the life to be checking posts here.

BeautyDebased -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 7:54:29 PM)
And now I'm a bitch for a simple opinion? I never said everyone, and as most people know there are good and bad where-ever you go, especially on forums, some browsing etc is fun but I prefer my Master to be focusing on U/us, not some website forums, and I don't see that as wrong, I also don't hate anyone who looks for a forum user as that's their choice just as mine is my choice. mittens.

Kaliko -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 8:24:07 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BeautyDebased And now I'm a bitch for a simple opinion? I never said everyone, and as most people know there are good and bad where-ever you go, especially on forums, some browsing etc is fun but I prefer my Master to be focusing on U/us, not some website forums, and I don't see that as wrong, I also don't hate anyone who looks for a forum user as that's their choice just as mine is my choice. mittens. No, you're right. I shouldn't say you're a bitch. I don't know you. Your posting was, though,...bitchy. As was mine. I understand that's your choice to not be with someone who posts on the forums...but I'm not here putting you down for your choice. When you say that you are leaving the board to get back to actually living the life, I'm sure you can understand how someone could be offended by that. The next logical step of your statement is that because I post on here, I'm not actually living the life.

LillyBoPeep -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/7/2011 10:39:59 PM)
what's bitchy is the condescending attitude that others who post on forums aren't living real lives, while you are, which makes you superior. it's all in the attitude and tone. i dont imagine it's really that big of a secret to you; you know your own motivations. =p when i was with my late Person, i posted on forums to yammer at likeminded people. we weren't involved in the local community, so i didn't really know any other s-type people to chat with. but holy crap, i was totally "living the life 4 realz" then, too. it's not an either-or situation; amazingly enough, people CAN do both.

OsideGirl -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/8/2011 7:17:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BeautyDebased There seems to be so many angry submissves here You seem to have missed that no one was angry. That's you putting your inflection into words typed on a screen.

domiguy -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/8/2011 7:32:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: 0ldhen quote: ORIGINAL: ElderKnight Nope, but seems my sarcastic sense of humor go over like a lead baloon on this site. Why is everyone so serious and rigid? A friend of mine(everybody say we miss ya FukinTroll) once commented that there should be a 72 hour death watch for new posters. A period of 72 hours during which they could read the forums but not post. This would allow the newbies to take time to observe who is who, how they talk and relate. You see like any other social group it is possible to make a faux paus here which can make you feel unaccepted or even attacked. I agree with him......if you first just join in a bit, observe, let folks get to know you, then your more serious posts get better reception. Plus you learn, if you ask a question, you'll get answered....not always in the manner you desire. Learn to accept this gracefully, learn to play back, learn to enjoy the banter....soon you will find everybody will develope respect or at least tolerence of you. Attack....get upset.....welll.....not so much then.....Sarcasm is an art form around here...but we know by the poster who is being sarcastic and who is not....again...it takes time....... Trolll could come on...answer a post that read "good morning" with "slurp ya slut" and he got answered with coos and begged for more. I can come on, name one of everybodies favorite boys Geogurt, discuss stealing and selling his manly products, and get help and cooperation from his friends, even his own lover. But I took the time to let everybody get to know me, some of the older posters I knew from before...but the newer ones I had to learn first. We are a fun bunch.....we can also be verra serious.....but if you go read a few pages on the I Admit thread, you'll see we also consider ourselves something of a family. Even those posters who make us roll our eyes and sigh.....if they have an issue...we are there with support. We have posters who sometimes go off the deep end...before we roast them for dinner we check....did you take your meds......is your back acting up again causing you pain making you crankier than normal...... Recently I was priveledged to go on vacation with several members off here.....I've met several others over time...in the past year I've had several come stay at my home for between a dinner to a 6 month time period. I've talked to their parents, spouses, lovers, Things......I know their pets names...their Dads medical history.....you get the idea here...... You...OP.....are joining in an extended family in a way....learn who likes corn...who likes raspberry jam.....that Aunt sadie wears two purple hats......learn to go...ok...I hate purple hats.....but I get how strongly Auntie dear loves them.....just not for me..... Try sticking around a bit.....open you mind(and heart) a wee bit more........you might find what you are looking for..... http://grammar.quickanddirtytips.com/ellipsis.aspx You should not replace all normal punctuation with ellipses. You should not allow the sweet lure of ellipses to muddle your ability to write a complete sentence. To quote the book Grammar for Dummies, “Using ellipses in this way can get annoying really fast.” The author of one of my favorite books, Punctuate it Right, feels this way about writers who use ellipses to imply that they have more to say: “It is doubtful that they have anything in mind, and the device seems a rather cheap one.”

OsideGirl -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/8/2011 7:50:00 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep what's bitchy is the condescending attitude that others who post on forums aren't living real lives, while you are, which makes you superior. Lilly is correct. And some of those posters have been in same D/s relationship for decades, so does make their lives more real than yours?

0ldhen -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/8/2011 8:07:11 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: domiguy http://grammar.quickanddirtytips.com/ellipsis.aspx You should not replace all normal punctuation with ellipses. You should not allow the sweet lure of ellipses to muddle your ability to write a complete sentence. To quote the book Grammar for Dummies, “Using ellipses in this way can get annoying really fast.” The author of one of my favorite books, Punctuate it Right, feels this way about writers who use ellipses to imply that they have more to say: “It is doubtful that they have anything in mind, and the device seems a rather cheap one.” Geezzz...Domi....stalking me lately...... I am a retired registered nurse....I graduated from John Hopkins School of Nursing back when...........Guess what...that means I have an education. I can even spell...but typing..not so much....so I leave typos.... I also have Word and Office programs.....if it was important I'd write it there and copy/paste. I just am not worried about it here. If my writing style offends thee....block...block...block......

Hisprettybaby -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/8/2011 8:44:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BeautyDebased I'd not have an avid forum member as someone I'd consider when I was looking, collared now but I'd have to wonder, why are you there listening to all these opinions of others rather than actually living the lifestyle yourself with a sub or slave....seems silly to me, I was attacked here once for putting smiles up so who knows, though I do wish you luck. Time to amscray from here and go back to actually living the life, my Master is home from work today [:)] Beauty. So you are saying that one cannot have time to read the forums once in awhile AND live a real life and that, because you do live a real life, you are somehow superior to the rest of us? Wow, that sounds pretty holier than thou to me. My life is very busy. At least five or six days of every seven are very full and busy, plus Daddy and I go to several "lifestyle" events each month(one of which we coordinate ourselves) AND I carve out a little time to peek in on the forums and add my [sm=2cents.gif]. So for you to think you are superior is B.S. because you don't even know us as real people. ~Hisprettybaby~

littlewonder -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/8/2011 9:06:25 AM)
for us it was simply easier for me to relocate than for Master. Should the sub always be the one to relocate? Hell no. It should be whoever finds it easier to relocate. Master knew I was planning to move somewhere, anywhere once my daughter graduated high school and went off to college. I had no ties to where I lived and I hated my job and wanted to leave anyway so it only made sense that I would be the one to relocate. Now if it's easier for the Dom to move then sure, I'm all for it. I've known doms who did and I've known couples where both relocated to an entirely new place together. It does tick me off when I hear that a sub is the one who should move. That's just completely absurd to me.

IrishMist -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/8/2011 9:53:45 AM)
quote: if someone gets so offended by a simple word then I wouldn't waste my time with them, I'd laugh at them because it's not meant to be taken all serious all the time So, you don't mind me referring to you at all times as the subbie whore with the mask on? Good. Makes things so much easier. quote: What I see most of is a"clique" of people who sit around telling opinions and attacking some who don't agree with them, Actually, we are AN ELITE CLIQUE of people. Elite because we actually go out of our way to TRY and help those who come here looking for advice. Want to be part of the clique? Then go out of your way to impart helpful advice. That is our only stipulation for admittance. quote: why are you there listening to all these opinions of others rather than actually living the lifestyle yourself with a sub or slave....seems silly to me, And why are YOU here, giving advice, when the forums are so obviously beneath you? quote: I decided to add this after speaking to my Master about this thread and what He had to say, Should we bow down and pay homage at your feet? quote: "Why should I have to relocate" .....well as my Master so simply put it, you, don't have to do a thing, if you want to wait where you are and are happy to stick to being stubborn while hoping someone closer to you will come along. Or perhaps, with such wise advice from your umm...boyfriend...we should then endeavor to do uproot our families and move to another city or state simply because others are too selfish to understand that our families are important to us. Geesh...you know what. Go away. The forums are a much better place without your condescending, pompous, nose in the air attitude.

NuevaVida -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/8/2011 2:47:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BeautyDebased There seems to be so many angry submissves here, "Why should I have to relocate" .....well as my Master so simply put it, you, don't have to do a thing, if you want to wait where you are and are happy to stick to being stubborn while hoping someone closer to you will come along. ::snipped:: I do suggest just talking to real subs who are seeking someone and say they are willing to relocate, you will likely get a better and more heartfelt response. Hmm forgive me for saying I think this is a bit silly. People have very valid reasons for not relocating, or for not knowing if they even can. I believe I gave some reasons earlier in this thread, in fact. Assuming it's someone being "stubborn" is really limited in thinking. People have all sorts of reasons for having concern about moving - family needs being a huge one, which has nothing to do with "stubborn", so I actually wondering if he who said that thinks his slave's family is inconsequential, in which case it wouldn't be stubbornness at all which would prevent me from moving, but loss of interest. I'm grateful that the Mister is considering all options in working through concerns about moving, so when there IS a move, it can be with a peaceful mind. And as for hoping someone closer comes along, that's kind of silly, too, in that - at least with me, anyway - I was pretty damn happy with my life when I met the Mister. Just so happened he wowed my world so my plans to be happily single changed. Finally, I'd like to point out that you made an entire post about people's reactions to a word. I'm curious why you are offended by others not liking a word? I mean, you took time out of your obviously very busy life to voice a discontent over people saying they don't like a word. Of all the threads on CM that you are far too busy to contribute to, this was your choice? To voice criticism? I find that fascinating.

JanahX -> RE: What do subbies & slaves truly desire? (8/8/2011 3:05:39 PM)
Original: IrishMist quote: Actually, we are AN ELITE CLIQUE of people. Elite because we actually go out of our way to TRY and help those who come here looking for advice. Want to be part of the clique? Then go out of your way to impart helpful advice. That is our only stipulation for admittance. quote: Geesh...you know what. Go away. The forums are a much better place without your condescending, pompous, nose in the air attitude. yes, please get out from these boards and don't get stuck like 99% of the "ELITE CLIQUE" that NEVER EVER leaves the net or these boards. This "ELITE CLIQUE" has so much helpful and useful information, that they obviously are in retirement from any kind of physical/real activity because anyone can see they never leave their fucking computers -EVER, So much so- you might notice that they comment on every single thread that was ever started, whether they have had any kind of involvement/experience or for that matter clue. You fucks know who you are. Been outside lately? [image]local://upfiles/1059980/EDC507F8CC1148678DB859F5B4BE62D4.jpg[/image]

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