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Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 4:45:59 PM

AlwaysLisa

Posts: 1088
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From: Washington State
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Question for the sadists, or masochists.

After cruising the "ideas for a sadistic master" thread, it raised a question. If you are a sadist, do you require a hands on approach for it to bring you pleasure? Or will pictures, video's, etc, do just the same?

Same for masochists, does it matter who (if anyone) creates the pain for it be pleasurable, or can you self inflict and get just as stimulated?

Do either require the right "mind set", or is it the act itself of giving/receiving of pain?

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RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 5:00:13 PM

HeatherMcLeather

Posts: 2559
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From: The dog house
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I don't think I count as a masochist really, I don't enjoy pain at all. What I do enjoy is being hurt by Hanners because she gets off on hurting me. So for me it has to be hands on. I can do it to myself, but she has to be there in person. I have to be able to see and hear that she's enjoying it to get any pleasure from it.

(in reply to AlwaysLisa)

Post #: 2

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 5:11:58 PM

ThundersCry

Posts: 892
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No...I never watched a video or read any books on how to *hurt* someone...I have a mind. Kinda...

It did help starting at the bottom for me, not everyones cup of tea...however I learned so much with different *toys*

Ya, it makes a difference who it is...

And yes, it`s nice to be in the right *mindset*...however thats not always possible...tsk tsk...sometimes all I could do was *endure* it...

John Cougar kinda enlightened me -L-

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Post #: 3

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 5:19:21 PM

Domspaintoy

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Joined: 2/25/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AlwaysLisa

Same for masochists, does it matter who (if anyone) creates the pain for it be pleasurable, or can you self inflict and get just as stimulated?

Do either require the right "mind set", or is it the act itself of giving/receiving of pain?

Yes it matters, only Master can inflict, create, instill pain on me and pain isnt pleasurable for pleasures sake, only because i know He is getting pleasure from the pain He inflicts do i get pleasure, if i know and there has been an odd occasion that Master hasnt been enjoying Himself i have found i dont get the same rush from it because as i see it im not pleasing Him.

We have built up such a level of trust & intimacy, if it were anyone else inflicting the cane, whip, knife etc i wouldnt go into the same space because although i would know and trust that Master knew what He was doing i would still know it wasnt Master doing it, unless i was blindfolded & had earplugs in lol

Hell pain hurts but it becomes amazing pain because i know & trust the Man who is administering it.

domspaintoy x

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Post #: 4

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 5:26:46 PM

HannahLynHeather

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hands on all the fucking way. sorry, but what's the point of making somebody bleed if you can't taste the blood?

i enjoy having her hurt herself, but that's more a mental sadism than a physical one. it's her struggle to do it that i'm enjoying then, not so much the activity, though an ouch is an ouch and tears are tears.

video and books can turn me on, but its more of a "ooo can't fucking wait to try that" sort of turn on. doing somebody online would be the last choice actually. self inflicted is the least appealing and remotely even more so. i suppose if i were watching somebody do somebody else on cam while i gave the orders might be kinda fucking neat. that's worth a try.

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Post #: 5

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 5:32:13 PM

Epytropos

Posts: 699
Joined: 7/23/2011
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Seeing pain inflicted by others gets me off the same way all porn does, which is to say in a pale, 'sufficient-but-not-ideal' kind of way. In the same way that porn will keep me from going insane between partners but in no way makes me not desire sex, watching sadism will suffice. I might be more interested in it if I was ordering someone to do it to themselves, but as I've said before my online experience is 0 so who knows?

As to masochism, self-harm (or whatever term you prefer) does nothing for me. I'm pretty sure that's because it isn't the pain per se that I get off on so much as the roughness and struggle that creates it in a sexual scenario. I don't know that I would get off on it if I willingly submitted and was bound and flogged - it's more when I'm pinning someone down and they get a hand free and try to injure me that it becomes fun.

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Post #: 6

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 5:40:55 PM

Aileen1968

Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AlwaysLisa

Question for the sadists, or masochists.

After cruising the "ideas for a sadistic master" thread, it raised a question. If you are a sadist, do you require a hands on approach for it to bring you pleasure? Or will pictures, video's, etc, do just the same?

Same for masochists, does it matter who (if anyone) creates the pain for it be pleasurable, or can you self inflict and get just as stimulated?

Do either require the right "mind set", or is it the act itself of giving/receiving of pain?

Trying to inflict pain on myself would be like stubbing my toe. There would be absolutely no enjoyment gotten from it.
For me, the biggest turn on is his face when he's hitting me. And it has to be him. He has been the only one for me.

edited to add...damn, I've been so fucking mushy lately. All of this lovey dovey talk.
Must snap out of it.

< Message edited by Aileen1968 -- 8/12/2011 5:45:42 PM >

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Post #: 7

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 5:50:49 PM

fragilepieces

Posts: 416
Joined: 7/6/2008
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It DOES matter who creates the pain---however I have gotten that desired "fogged out---I have no thought in my head other than this pain I am feeling" from accidental intense pain.

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Post #: 8

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 5:51:27 PM

HeatherMcLeather

Posts: 2559
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From: The dog house
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quote:

edited to add...damn, I've been so fucking mushy lately. All of this lovey dovey talk.
Must snap out of it.

Really, you're starting to sound like me!

(in reply to Aileen1968)

Post #: 9

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 5:58:14 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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I can get some form of enjoyment out of just about any kind of other people's pain. It's not as good as inflicting it Myself. Watching other people play can be a heck of a lot of fun. When people come to the forums and talk about what they've done that's BDSM related in any way, that can give Me a happy, too.

Self inflicted with no inner turmoil? Not so much. It's probably way down on the list on the enjoyment scale. Kind of like how make believe or fantasies just don't thrill Me as much as the real thing.

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Post #: 10

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 6:11:37 PM

Aileen1968

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From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
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quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather

quote:

edited to add...damn, I've been so fucking mushy lately. All of this lovey dovey talk.
Must snap out of it.
Really, you're starting to sound like me!

Yeah...three years together and I'm still head over heels.

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Post #: 11

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 6:41:59 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

I'm not a maso but Master is a sadist. I get off from him causing me pain because it's him and because I love him and love to know he's enjoying hurting me and he's happy. If anyone else would do it to me it would just piss me off. The times he has me hurt myself it's incredibly difficult for me because I get absolutely no enjoyment from it whatsoever. I'm not turned on even though it is for him and his pleasure but I still find that it just doesn't create the same headspace for me which is why he likes it.

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Post #: 12

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 7:29:40 PM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

quote:

ORIGINAL: AlwaysLisa

Question for the sadists, or masochists.

After cruising the "ideas for a sadistic master" thread, it raised a question. If you are a sadist, do you require a hands on approach for it to bring you pleasure? Or will pictures, video's, etc, do just the same?

Same for masochists, does it matter who (if anyone) creates the pain for it be pleasurable, or can you self inflict and get just as stimulated?

Do either require the right "mind set", or is it the act itself of giving/receiving of pain?

Trying to inflict pain on myself would be like stubbing my toe. There would be absolutely no enjoyment gotten from it.
For me, the biggest turn on is his face when he's hitting me. And it has to be him. He has been the only one for me.

edited to add...damn, I've been so fucking mushy lately. All of this lovey dovey talk.
Must snap out of it.

yeah, you quite disgust me.

agirl

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Post #: 13

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 7:42:06 PM

caelestis

Posts: 195
Joined: 9/6/2008
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No, the act of bringing myself pain is never as fulfilling as someone I adore, trust and respect doing it to me. When it comes to self harm, I am an utter wuss. I cannot push my own limits (as far as masochism is concerned) as well as some of the people I play with.

Plus the mindset that comes with trusting another to give you pain lifts my endurance. Going into any sort of scene I know will be painful I'm nervous, fidgety, and one of the things that calm me is the confidence I have in my play partner. I know I will come out of the scene bruised and crying but euphoric, and that is something I could never do to myself.

If it was me doing it to myself, I'd have to think about it. Part of the delight I get from pain is when I reach a certain point I simply can't think about anything else. My mind is blank, I'm little more than a quivering, whimpering, hunk of flesh.. and in that moment I truly feel free. Free to let myself react purely out of instinct, instead of having to think out every thing I do, instead of worrying what my reaction may cause others to think.

/rant

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Post #: 14

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 10:04:08 PM

LillyBoPeep

Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
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if all i want to do is feel shivery, i can put clothespins on myself and wait around as the warm throbbing pain starts to seep in.
but a lot of what i get from masochism/suffering comes from having it inflicted on me by someone else.
and the "who" does matter -- i've said in other threads that one person can inspire me to greater heights than another person.

there are other things that cause pain that inexplicably turn me on. early on that was how i dabbled in my masochistic tendencies and when i first really related to the word. i would linger in situations that caused pain because i was such a fan of the sensation.
but pain at the whim of someone else takes the cake for me. =p

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Post #: 15

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 11:28:29 PM

NuevaVida

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Joined: 8/5/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AlwaysLisa

Same for masochists, does it matter who (if anyone) creates the pain for it be pleasurable, or can you self inflict and get just as stimulated?

If someone other than the Mister inflicts pain, I'm going to get really pissed off. When I inflict pain on myself (by accident), it does not make me happy. It's not about the pain for pain's sake, it's about the connection between he and I. It's his power, and his use of that power to cause pain, which does it for me.

It's not "pain", it's "pain from him." Period.

quote:

Do either require the right "mind set", or is it the act itself of giving/receiving of pain?

The mindset is that he owns me and wants to hurt me. That's pretty much all I need.

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Post #: 16

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/12/2011 11:43:32 PM

VaguelyCurious

Posts: 5264
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From: United Kingdom
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FR

For me, self-inflicted is equally as good. But then my masochistic side really is just that - masochistic, not submissive.

(Not to carp on but BRAND NEW TENS MACHINE YAAAAAY!)

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Post #: 17

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/13/2011 4:54:58 PM

zephyroftheNorth

Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
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Hi Lisa,

Nope, it has to be live and in person, I get nothing from watching others have the fun. It makes me nervous if the D-type I'm with is watching others, it usually means he is getting ideas and I'm going to be the one he experiments on lol.

#7

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Post #: 18

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/13/2011 7:03:26 PM

0ldhen

Posts: 2221
Joined: 12/27/2010
From: Henhouse in Trolltopia, Harleyville USA
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No casual play for me.....Yes...I am a masochist but only to the one who holds my heart.....along with the rest of me....

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Post #: 19

RE: Hurts so good? - 8/14/2011 8:12:28 AM

coookie

Posts: 541
Joined: 10/25/2010
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I can hurt myself but it doesn't make me squishy ..only he makes me squishy and it is the fact that he is enjoying it so damn much!

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Post #: 20

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