RE: What do you do when a "slave" does not care?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: What do you do when a "slave" does not care?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: What do you do when a "slave" does not care?

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: What do you do when a "slave" does not care? - 10/30/2006 1:03:56 PM

captiveprincess

Posts: 17
Joined: 3/15/2006
Status: offline

     I know there have been many responses and since I haven't read them all yet I may be repeating some of what others have said. First of all, I agree that this girl is no slave. She doesn't even sound very submissive, actually. It sounds to me like she would do better in a kinky but vanilla relationship where she can still do what she wants but have some kink on the side. And yes, she probably is young and immature, but don't blame it all on that. This girl does not want to SUBMIT to you, or to anyone it sounds like. She wants to have her cake and eat it too, so to speak. For many, the lifestyle is a romantic and almost storylike fantasy but when they try to make it a reality, they realize just how much work it actually is. A true D/s relationship is much more intimate and takes more work than a regular vanilla relationship, in my opinion.
    And also, let me state that if You enter a poly relationship with thoughts of trying to "fix" what is wrong now, it will NOT work. Poly is even harder than a regular D/s relationship because not only does the Dom have to take care of one sub and her feelings of importance and being loved, but has to do that with more than one and still keep them all feeling equally important. And let me tell you coming from a female perspective (and also from a poly household), females are usually more jealous than me, and the two women had best be really good friends (or at least have the potential to be) before trying to love and comfort and dominate both of them.
     My suggestion to You, BBVD, is to sit down and explain to her that You feel the relationship isn't working. That she has violated the agreement she made to You at the beginning, and that if she doesn't make an effort to change then You're going to have to cut Your losses and find someone who can give You the service You need.

_____________________________

"I believe that in the heart of each human being there is something which I can only describe as a "child of darkness" who is equal and complementary to the more obvious "child of light" ~Laurens van der Post

(in reply to BigBadVoodooDadd)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: What do you do when a "slave" does not care? - 10/30/2006 7:57:22 PM

CrappyDom

Posts: 1883
Joined: 4/11/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

I generally stay out of posts by dominants if I can't give positive advice but my gut tells me the "submissive" would make someone like me very very happy and that this "dominant" simply doesn't have what it takes to make it work.

8-12 submissives in eight years? Unless your standards are very very low, that is a lot of women in a very short period of time. I am pretty sure most of them did not do dual majors and have aspirations to be an FBI agent.

Funny thing is a buddy of mine had a VERY hot girlfriend about that time who was bright as hell, and wanted to join the FBI and was kinky, never played with her due to him, I wonder...

(in reply to captiveprincess)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: What do you do when a "slave" does not care? - 10/30/2006 8:28:50 PM

slavemaia

Posts: 395
Joined: 8/26/2006
Status: offline

IF - and that's a big factor, the slave does not care, there is nothing you can do. No one can actually force another to be a slave or anything they want them to be for that matter - not without illegal action, that is.

my suggestion is to meet with her and sit down and discuss all your concerns, find out what she's comfortable with at this time. After all D/s or M/s needs to be something both parties are very excited about and commited to. That can't be forced. Either it's there or it isn't. Being a slave is a pretty intense step and typically requires a much greater degree of surrender than being a bottom or a sub - at least in my opinion. Perhaps a slave is not what she intended.

In any event i doubt you'll get anywhere making demands on her. If submission isn't given freely what's the point?

_____________________________

She reaches up, not for the apple, but for what causes it to be there.
slave to love - - Chairman's maia

(in reply to captiveprincess)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: What do you do when a "slave" does not care? - 11/27/2006 3:12:15 AM

MasterStoney442

Posts: 39
Joined: 8/23/2005
Status: offline

Rose442

A bit of advice from me to you . You may take it or not . In you there are alot of your own insecurity. You are like that little school girl that thinks that you see is wrong , It is within you . Look at what you are doing to get the relaion back on track. You seem to think that every thing that you see is like a game . Due to your lack of trust with you and with the person you are with , there will be nothing but trouble . I am sure the person you are with does not want this and you do not either . Come on just l3et it be like it was . It was good and now look .

_____________________________

when you look at life it looks back at you

(in reply to naughtygeisha)

Profile

Post #: 44

RE: What do you do when a "slave" does not care? - 11/27/2006 2:28:46 PM

heartfeltsub

Posts: 1641
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline

Am wondering why Rose442's Master is using this forum to say this to her as opposed to just saying it to her in person, as she is your slave.

(in reply to MasterStoney442)

Profile

Post #: 45

RE: What do you do when a "slave" does not care? - 11/27/2006 5:34:48 PM

slaverose442

Posts: 7
Joined: 9/25/2006
Status: offline

I am wondering why it is here at all. This is not anyone's business on here.

rose442

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Profile

Post #: 46

RE: What do you do when a "slave" does not care? - 11/27/2006 8:01:11 PM

MmakeMme

Posts: 682
Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NC
Status: offline

It sounds as though she likes the idea of a D/s M/s relationship but is not a lifestyler. Can ~you~ be happy with that? Love can overlook a lot but respect trumps everything.

_____________________________

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. ~~ Dalai Lama

(in reply to agirl)

Profile

Post #: 47

RE: What do you do when a "slave" does not care? - 11/28/2006 10:26:24 AM

MagiksSlave

Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline

You people do realise this thread is over 2 years old??

Magik's slave

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.

-Rodney Atkins-

(in reply to MmakeMme)

Profile

Post #: 48