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A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 9:27:02 PM   
PhageSylver


Posts: 6
Joined: 7/23/2011
Status: offline 		Since I joined this site I've encountered many "doms" who seem to think that a submissive that has a backbone and uses it seems to be a bad thing. Have any of you other submissives out there had that issue?
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RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 9:37:06 PM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PhageSylver

Since I joined this site I've encountered many "doms" who seem to think that a submissive that has a backbone and uses it seems to be a bad thing. Have any of you other submissives out there had that issue?


Not here at all really....but in time of yore, yup. I seemed to see quite a lot of chaps with less back-bone than my newly formed one.....so it was even-stevens.

agirl


_____________________________

See how easy it can be?

(in reply to PhageSylver)
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RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 9:51:50 PM   
PhageSylver


Posts: 6
Joined: 7/23/2011
Status: offline 		Well when random dom's message me and calling me things like "sub", they get a serious bug up their ass if I politely ask them to call me by the name i was given. I mean, yeah i'm a submissive but i do like when people use my name, Master calls me by name, why can't anyone else? of course then they say I have an attitude problem and say a good "beating" would suit me well.

(in reply to agirl)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 9:58:39 PM   
RaspberryLemon


Posts: 422
Joined: 7/18/2011
Status: offline 		Nope. My Master likes my backbone. Can't imagine it any other way.

(in reply to PhageSylver)
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RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 10:00:01 PM   
seekingreality


Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PhageSylver

Since I joined this site I've encountered many "doms" who seem to think that a submissive that has a backbone and uses it seems to be a bad thing. Have any of you other submissives out there had that issue?


The fundamental problem with asking such a general question is the word "backbone" is more or less meaningless. The behavior that strikes you as "backbone" might strike someone else as arrogant, irritating, snide or whatever. So unless you describe the specific behavior you're referring to, no one can really answer you, because even if they answer you, you won't really know if you mean the same thing by "backbone."

As a broad generalization -- and again, hard to do anything else with such a broad question -- I find many dommes enjoy a sub who is confident, knows his worth, and has dignity. So my guess is, if I interpret what you mean by backbone correctly, I'd probably disagree with you.

(in reply to PhageSylver)
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RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 10:07:35 PM   
MrSprocket


Posts: 85
Joined: 8/10/2011
From: Cyberspace
Status: offline 		It's a perception thing and differs from person to person.

Yeah, I've read many profiles where dominants will try belittling even the people who read their profile. Some subs seem to be into that though.


I guess that if you don't like how someone acts, you could just stay away, right?

_____________________________

I am a meat popsicle.

(in reply to seekingreality)
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RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 10:19:57 PM   
BloodRed


Posts: 13
Joined: 5/26/2008
From: Western Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrSprocket

It's a perception thing and differs from person to person.

Yeah, I've read many profiles where dominants will try belittling even the people who read their profile. Some subs seem to be into that though.


I guess that if you don't like how someone acts, you could just stay away, right?


I agree, to each their own.
Though at times I wonder what a Sub would become under such a regime... Perhaps a sub no more.

-BR

(in reply to MrSprocket)
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RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 10:20:53 PM   
PhageSylver


Posts: 6
Joined: 7/23/2011
Status: offline 		by backbone. I mean not letting someone treat them like a doormat, that they shouldn't just bow down to every tom dick and harry who calls themselves a master or a dom. I get flack from other men who say they are doms because they "demand" I call them master or sir upon first message. By backbone i mean a female or male submissive that knows what they want, but aren't afraid to stand up for themselves when some asshole treats them like they should just bow on the sole reason of them being submissive.

(in reply to MrSprocket)
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RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 10:25:11 PM   
BloodRed


Posts: 13
Joined: 5/26/2008
From: Western Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PhageSylver

by backbone. I mean not letting someone treat them like a doormat, that they shouldn't just bow down to every tom dick and harry who calls themselves a master or a dom. I get flack from other men who say they are doms because they "demand" I call them master or sir upon first message. By backbone i mean a female or male submissive that knows what they want, but aren't afraid to stand up for themselves when some asshole treats them like they should just bow on the sole reason of them being submissive.


Hmm... How pathetically insecure.

Such is to say, if one deems themselves a good judge of character, we are to stand to speak and bow to them in their black robe.

-BR


(in reply to PhageSylver)
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RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 10:29:17 PM   
PhageSylver


Posts: 6
Joined: 7/23/2011
Status: offline 		I've been with my master for 3 years now and he encourages me to stand up for myself. He likes the fact that I can hold my own against asshole males who try to "make" me bow despite the fact that I'm happily owned and don't feel I HAVE to call them sir just because they are mr. domly dom from dom-ville

(in reply to BloodRed)
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RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 11:14:05 PM   
hangemhigh1953


Posts: 245
Joined: 7/8/2011
Status: offline 		If a sub is powerful wouldn't it only make their submission that much more meaningful? And bring greater satisfaction to the Dom/me who can tame them?

(in reply to PhageSylver)
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RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/17/2011 11:56:43 PM   
seekingreality


Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PhageSylver

by backbone. I mean not letting someone treat them like a doormat, that they shouldn't just bow down to every tom dick and harry who calls themselves a master or a dom. I get flack from other men who say they are doms because they "demand" I call them master or sir upon first message. By backbone i mean a female or male submissive that knows what they want, but aren't afraid to stand up for themselves when some asshole treats them like they should just bow on the sole reason of them being submissive.


Sure, there are plenty of assholes on CM and plenty of people who will try to dom you before they know you are and earned that right from you. There are plenty of doms here, as in real life, who are arrogant, stupid, unpleasant people. But there is lots of pleasant, reasonable people too. I wouldn't generalization. People are people, and they come in the full spectrum of personality.

(in reply to PhageSylver)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/18/2011 9:23:18 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		OP, why are you responding?

You're in a relationship, but they don't respect that. They're demanding you cheat on your partner. Do you really think somebody like that is a person you are going to have any decent conversation with?

Besides, they aren't reading your profile. They send the same email to every new female who shows up on the site. Think of them as telemarketers and just hang up.


_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to seekingreality)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/18/2011 9:42:50 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

Besides, they aren't reading your profile. They send the same email to every new female who shows up on the site. Think of them as telemarketers and just hang up.




I always ignore emails from anyone who sounds like he came here after buying Submissive Women's Secrets

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/18/2011 4:00:27 PM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline 		theyre all part of the forna and flora around here.  just ignore them and theyll go away in time.

i found that the stronger my profile was about who i was and why and i sounded more like i knew what i was doing the less they bothered me.  i read youre profile and its first para is all about them, why waste youre profile on that, its almost like an invitation to bother you so you can get snippy with them.

according to youre profile youre looking for dominant men amongst others - so if you are id suggest you spend more time about who that is youre looking for and avoid the whole 'leave me alone and treat me with respect' thats just inviting the domlydoms to swagger in and try to prove their salt.  dont pander to them and eventually theyll piss off and bug someone else.

_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/18/2011 6:54:42 PM   
Hisprettybaby


Posts: 781
Joined: 4/13/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		~FR~
Your profile says you're happily owned and collared to a Dom, so why are you even looking for other Doms or entertaining their correspondences? There will always be assholes out there that expect instant submission & want you to fall to your knees at the mere mention of their names. If they bother you, just BLOCK and DELETE. Problem solved. It really IS that simple. I learned that years ago.

~Hisprettybaby~

(in reply to lally2)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/18/2011 7:25:13 PM   
Firebirdseeking


Posts: 477
Joined: 9/3/2006
Status: offline 		: ) that is exactly right. "Dom" who thinks a sub should not be strong is threatened by a strong sub. Not much of a dom, then, is he??

(in reply to hangemhigh1953)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/18/2011 9:45:15 PM   
Kaliko


Posts: 3381
Joined: 9/25/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

quote:

Besides, they aren't reading your profile. They send the same email to every new female who shows up on the site. Think of them as telemarketers and just hang up.




I always ignore emails from anyone who sounds like he came here after buying Submissive Women's Secrets


LOL....yes, rustle up a submissive woman and you'll have all the hot and steamy sex you can handle...learn how to find a submissive woman of your very own for only $19.95.



(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/19/2011 4:39:03 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		haha submissive womens secrets returns! ^_^
yeah, if something that sounds like it came from there comes in my inbox, i just delete, and occasionally block.

these are a similar brand of asshole to the ones who pop into your inbox writing "hey useless piece of whore meat, send me pics."
uh... yeah fucking right.

i don't know why you even respond to people like this, OP. make a pre-new-years-resolution to stop communicating with them. =)


_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


(in reply to Kaliko)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: A strong, independent submissive. - 8/19/2011 6:42:26 AM   
stoni23


Posts: 178
Joined: 1/14/2010
Status: offline 		My Ma'am refers to me as whore or dorkface lol so whooo knows.

Seriously though, there are a lot of people that are into having the no backbone submissive side. And there are a lot of Doms that prefer it. It may not necessarily mean they are weak Doms, they just want that aspect of power. OR it could mean that they are low on self esteem and need to take it out on someone by belittling them lol.

Either way, you have a Master that appreciates you already, so I wouldn't care what other Doms are saying to you via messages if I was you.

_____________________________

Aren't we all just a little bit fake and a lot real?

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 20
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