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Lockit -> RE: A long road.. (8/18/2011 11:32:34 AM)
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There have been many threads about sub frenzy, but dominants are not immune to it. I'd say you have a pretty bad case of it. You want it, you want it now and are in a hurry to make it happen. You admit you are new... so slow down and actually listen to what people are saying to you, rather than complain that it's not happening and everyone is fake or not serious. This is far different than the swinger's scene, although its been many years since I was involved.
The serious typically look for certain things in a dominant and have a few more things to consider in a poly situation. Most often they are looking for a reality base, patience, experience and signs of a dominant(s) or relationship, they can believe in. Sometimes it is not in how people respond to you... but how you present yourself. Put some effort into that and you may see some more serious interest. Examine yourselves and how you are presenting yourselves, what you are presenting and see if there is anything you are doing, once someone is in contact with you, that might be sending them packing. It isn't always the fault of another, when we are having difficulties.
You are looking for something that is more rare. Someone that wants to enter an existing relationship. They are out there, but they are selective and should be. Are you who you need to be to attract them and keep them? Are you putting in the effort to assure a successful outcome? Are you people that can be admired, respected and trusted? Attend to that.
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