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RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 2:50:39 PM   
Kaliko


Posts: 3381
Joined: 9/25/2010
Status: offline 		A Taken in Hand relationship is one in which the man and woman are married, monogamous, and the relationship is male dominated - based on the fact that he is the male. It doesn't technically have to incorporate domestic discipline, but often does.

As some on here already know, I'm a fan of Taken in Hand, even with the religious bent it can (but does not have to) have. I'm also a believer, in my relationships, in submitting to a man based on the fact that he is a man and I am a woman. Monogamy is where I run into a problem. So, though I'm a fan, I can't say I ever expect to be able to fully define myself as being in a Taken in Hand relationship.



< Message edited by Kaliko -- 9/1/2011 2:52:03 PM >

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 2:59:13 PM   
Kaliko


Posts: 3381
Joined: 9/25/2010
Status: offline 		What's more strange...look at the "skills" tab on the profile. Now that is a limited list.

I think the lists cannot possibly be exhaustive and the best bet is to put what's important to you in your profile.

(in reply to Kaliko)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 3:13:02 PM   
zephyroftheNorth


Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
Status: offline
quote:

i said that slave was an appropriate a category for a women who wanted to define herself who was in the Gorean lifestyle and i stand by that


And you are wrong. There are plenty of females into Gor who are not slaves. You can stand by it all you like, you're still wrong. Also TiH and Gor have nothing in common, telling you to go there was a terrible suggestion.

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RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 3:56:45 PM   
Arpig


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quote:

however slave is a perfectly acceptable and common term for a female slave in the gorean lifestyle.
And "submissive" is a perfectly acceptable term for a woman in a "Taken in hand" relationship.

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RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 4:14:28 PM   
Endivius


Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline 		TIH is not really something I think needs it's own "catagory." If you can't accept the association of a 1950's household to what you want, put LFTIH and a link to a website that most represents your idea of what you want. Stop being lazy.

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RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 4:19:42 PM   
slaveluci


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Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
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quote:

ORIGINAL: tolovetolaugh

What is "taken in hand" ?



http://www.takeninhand.com/personal.ads

http://www.ownership-possession.com/wiki/Taken_in_Hand/

http://wikibin.org/articles/taken-in-hand.html

See how easy that is? Doing a search would've taken the same amount (or less) time than typing in a couple posts asking others what it is. I will take the bait, however, as I am a librarian and can't let such a question go unanswered

luci

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RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 4:20:49 PM   
LanceHughes


Posts: 4737
Joined: 2/12/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I always gigglesnort when someone says they are OG. That they follow OG ideals, cool. Otherwise? They better be collecting social security!

First check comes in a few months, 'K?

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RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 4:38:40 PM   
LanceHughes


Posts: 4737
Joined: 2/12/2004
Status: offline 		OP - I'm reminded of the time the Atheistic organization* I was in had a member who wanted us to all support / join the Sierra Club and somehow make that a part of being an Atheist.  Sure, but go join the local chapter.....

slaveluci did a fine job (good girl) of some links to "Taken In Hand" sites.  <Only started to read first one, but quickly "got" it.>  Maybe you can join those sites for TIH, and stay here for BDSM.  I see that sex is frowned upon over there.  See what reaction you get to asking for a category of BDSM in their profile lists.


* Atheistic organization n. Oxymoron, similar to "herding cats."





< Message edited by LanceHughes -- 9/1/2011 4:40:53 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 48
RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 5:12:07 PM   
tolovetolaugh


Posts: 648
Joined: 4/30/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci


quote:

ORIGINAL: tolovetolaugh

What is "taken in hand" ?



http://www.takeninhand.com/personal.ads

http://www.ownership-possession.com/wiki/Taken_in_Hand/

http://wikibin.org/articles/taken-in-hand.html

See how easy that is? Doing a search would've taken the same amount (or less) time than typing in a couple posts asking others what it is. I will take the bait, however, as I am a librarian and can't let such a question go unanswered

luci


I really loved some of the advice on that first site.

"Good people will not complain that you don't trust them, they will think you very wise to be cautious."
"Take things a lot slower than your hormones may be telling you to take them."

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(in reply to slaveluci)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 5:39:46 PM   
Arpig


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From: Increasingly further from reality
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quote:

"Take things a lot slower than your hormones may be telling you to take them."
Why? You have at best 80 or 90 years...cram as much life into them as you possibly can.

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Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

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(in reply to tolovetolaugh)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 5:43:23 PM   
tolovetolaugh


Posts: 648
Joined: 4/30/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

quote:

"Take things a lot slower than your hormones may be telling you to take them."
Why? You have at best 80 or 90 years...cram as much life into them as you possibly can.


Yes and I don't want to waste any of them on wanksters, or wham bam thank you mams.


_____________________________


That which yields, is not always weak. —
Jacqueline Carey (Kushiel's Dart)

I wrote a porn!
http://www.collarchat.com/m_3840531

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 5:47:03 PM   
SoulAlloy


Posts: 2106
Joined: 8/23/2009
From: Preston, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci


quote:

ORIGINAL: tolovetolaugh

What is "taken in hand" ?



http://www.takeninhand.com/personal.ads

http://www.ownership-possession.com/wiki/Taken_in_Hand/

http://wikibin.org/articles/taken-in-hand.html

See how easy that is? Doing a search would've taken the same amount (or less) time than typing in a couple posts asking others what it is. I will take the bait, however, as I am a librarian and can't let such a question go unanswered

luci


Were it not for kinky librarians we would all be less informed...

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RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 6:55:18 PM   
Dreamless


Posts: 104
Joined: 7/30/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

quote:

however slave is a perfectly acceptable and common term for a female slave in the gorean lifestyle.
And "submissive" is a perfectly acceptable term for a woman in a "Taken in hand" relationship.

Exactly what I wanted to post. Taken in Hand is just a Male/female dom/sub relationship with perhaps the individual twist that "because he is the man he is the dominant partner" and or "domestic discipline" going on... it's a fancy way of avoiding saying that you're a kinkster, folks! Admit it, either you're 1) religious, 2) kinky, or 3) both. If it's what you're into, enjoy it, and don't try prettify the word "submissive" out of the picture because it's bloody well what a woman in a TiH relationship is. Is this a case of 'a rose by any other name' or 'call shit shit'? Who knows. But I never saw much difference between TiH and dom/sub relationships with a specific kink for say, 50s households, domestic discipline, Manly Macho Mr Domly Dom Sir, whatever.

Hell, seeing as I see an awful lot of male dom/female sub couples in the BDSM spectrum, I'd say that the concept is pretty much normal, run of the mill, basic vanilla kink. Everyone's doing it! Except for those that aren't. Just check the freaking sub box, or check the freaking dom box, or switch or slave. I don't even think slave is necessary. Just check sub. Though I would like to see a few more additional options for things like top, bottom, sadist, masochist... not every masochist is submissive, for example, and someone might just be looking for pain and not ID as submissive at all.

I'd rather see that than TiH added. Most people into that are probably just going to look for their partner at church. >_>

No offense meant to people into that, by the way. It's just I don't think it needs its own category, if you're that set on having it, it's the sort of thing you should be linking from your profile, I feel, and not the laundry list of kinks.

(in reply to Arpig)
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RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 7:08:25 PM   
Firebirdseeking


Posts: 477
Joined: 9/3/2006
Status: offline 		I am surprised that some folks here have never heard of a taken in hand relationship. Surprised, because that is where I discovered there was a word/description for who I am and what I need. I realize that the site itself is not necessarily held in high esteem by some here, but then, Collarme does not always attract the kind of people we would like it to, either. My doing a great deal of reading there, and trying hard to resist the feelings I was having there, is what brought me here. Precious, I was not initially interested in kink, and I know there are some here who are into the power exchange and not kink; but many people are into the kink as well in varying degrees. Over time, I began to understand how some kink, at least for me, underscores the D/s dynamic. But I remember when I first wrote a profile, I said I didnt know if I belonged "here". Someone wrote me back and said "If you think you might belong here, then you do". It was a process.

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Profile   Post #: 54
RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 7:36:36 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SoulAlloy

Were it not for kinky librarians we would all be less informed...

How very true! Thanks for noticing

luci

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RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 7:51:28 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14442
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PreciousT

I was reading some about taken in hand relationships and I was thinking that maybe this is really its own category that people should be able to define themselves as or if not going that far add it to the interest section.
Seems like women and men who identify themselves as this should have there own search profile.

Taken in Hand is a version of D/s, which is already covered.

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RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 7:53:22 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14442
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

Well you see, there's the rub. You have preconceived notions regarding each possible descriptor.
Now when I think of "Taken in hand" I think of right-wing politics and evangelical Christianity merged together into a vaguely kinky sex life.
I see: Right-wing politics and evangelical Christianity merged together into an "afraid to admit I'm kinky" sex life.


_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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Profile   Post #: 57
RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 8:13:19 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline
quote:

Yes and I don't want to waste any of them on wanksters, or wham bam thank you mams.
Your "waste of time" is my "fun night".

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


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Profile   Post #: 58
RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 8:47:18 PM   
imperatrixx


Posts: 903
Joined: 3/29/2011
Status: offline 		Person wants a category for their lifestyle.

3 pages about how OP is wrong for wanting this.

I predict this will be a good 8 pages of bored old chicks on the internet drama before it fizzles out.

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: taken in hand its own category? - 9/1/2011 9:09:21 PM   
Kaliko


Posts: 3381
Joined: 9/25/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: imperatrixx

I predict this will be a good 8 pages of bored old chicks on the internet drama before it fizzles out.


Well, yeah! What else am I supposed to do? Nobody ran with the semen-in-the-kitchen topic I liked so much on another thread, so now it's Taken in Hand or nothing.



(in reply to imperatrixx)
Profile   Post #: 60
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