RE: Who has taken Adderall, Vyvanse, Ritalin, etc.? - 9/3/2011 1:10:41 AM
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Hippiekinkster
Posts: 5512
Joined: 11/20/2007 From: Liechtenstein Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: tolovetolaugh Adderall gives great focus, but at least if you are taking the capsule form you wont be able to sleep on days you take it at first, It is a great diet pill, it makes you want to be active, and you have no urge to eat. Eating just... bores you until you notice your stomach is rumbling. It can also make you get really bad acne. I also would feel very jittery, like my body was exercising or shaking when I was still. I have gotten some very minor jitters (I think they call this Akisthesia; I don't remember), but not more than I'd get after, say, a single cup of coffee. I (so far) am able to focus in a more productive way (I read someone on a very informative ADD-I (ADD-Inattentive) forum who asserted that our problem isn't lack of attention... it's hyperfocus to the exclusion of all else...), but I am still having motivational problems. It's the translation of the redirected focus from the planning to the execution which is the difficulty. It's quite easy for me to (as I just did yesterday) make an "executive action plan" detailing the tasks which I need to complete, and to categorize them according to a logical (to me) division of effort/time.function (for instance, administrative, which are the bill-paying, insurance quote-gathering, bookkeeping etc. tasks; maintenance, which is cleaning, house and car repairs, and so on; self-maintenance (grooming, diet, doctors, etc.); income production (repair/staging of townhouse; search for compatible housemate)... however, it is the execution and completion of those checklist items which is the stumbling block. They offer no stimulation whatsoever. They not only do not hold my interest, I can't get interested in doing them in the first place. I'm able to focus on things that I am interested in (I acquired a passable knowledge of German because it was a step in my goal to go to Germany for my 50th), but I often leave the project unfinished (I am not yet fluent in German). THis has been a lifelong problem (here's another: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schizoid_personality_disorder ). And there's the PTSD. And theres the sleep disorder (forget the name; basically I'm time-shifted) Much of this is stuff that has been gifted to me by amazingly fucked up adults posing as parents, caregivers, etc., who left me to deal with this shit while they absolved themselves of responsibility (it's in gawd's hands, that kind of avopidance shit) and I've somehow been able to struggle through until now, when I've hit the wall. I've been trying to figure out how to fix myself, without any luck, for a long time ( memory came to me the other day, whilst thinking about all this. Twas the 3rd grade, and I and a bunch of kids were in the lunchroom at school, and we were talking about what we wanted to be as grownups. My choice was Psychiatrist. I think I was prescient. Enough rambling (that's the hyperfocus thing coming out, maybe).
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"We are convinced that freedom w/o Socialism is privilege and injustice, and that Socialism w/o freedom is slavery and brutality." Bakunin “Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore we are saved by love.” Reinhold Ne
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