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RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 2:34:37 PM   
SuzeCheri


Posts: 483
Joined: 7/19/2011
From: Outside looking in
Status: offline
quote:

If the willingness to help improves?  I'll post a topic asking. 
In other words you won't chance it. If everybody promises to behave, you'll grace them with your questions. Pretty lame.

Look, both of us are extreme newbies, not only to the site, but to the whole concept of BDSM, yet we started a few threads. I started a very ambitious thread down in the Polyamory forum; a bunch of complete newbs giving advice on how to make a poly relationship work, that one worked out pretty well. We started a couple of other threads as well they didn't go over very well, gay issues aren't really of interest here. (There's to many people with bizarre prejudices). But guess what? When I think of another gay related topic, I'll post it and yes, it will be inundated by homophobes in disguise spouting some bizarre biological claptrap about how being gay is wrong, and I'll just ignore those posts for the most part and look for the ones that actually address the issue I raised. Like an adult. I will mostly ignore the sniping and bickering and the insults, like an adult.

I wasn't afraid to post here, why on earth would anybody over the age of 12 be afraid to post on a forum? I've been posting on forums of one sort or another for nearly 10 years now, I know how they work, I know what to expect. How anybody in 2011 who is old enough to be on this site could possibly not know these things is beyond me. You think this place is rough? Try a room full of tweenie girls arguing over which Spice Girl is the best or if Britney or Christina is the better singer. You and the other manly Doms around here wouldn't survive 10 minutes. They'll freaking steal your boyfriend for daring to disagree with them. And cliques? OMFG, you don't even begin to understand the meaning of that word till you deal with high school girls on a forum!!!

So, like I said, put up, or shut up. That's all there is to it. Stop hijacking threads, stop making snarky posts, stop making jokes, just stop doing all the things you are objecting to and report those posts you think cross the line. Go down to the cuckqueen thread and contribute something, either a viewpoint or a good question. Go to Ask a Master and contribute something worthwhile. Stop demanding others change and start leading the way.

Either that or STFU.

(in reply to NocturnalStalker)
Profile   Post #: 161
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 2:46:17 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline

Hey Suze, anybody ever tell you that


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Profile   Post #: 162
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 3:05:06 PM   
SuzeCheri


Posts: 483
Joined: 7/19/2011
From: Outside looking in
Status: offline
Why yes, 12 to 15 times a day on average. When I walk down the hall at school that is pretty much all I hear.

Ummmmm, Suze....

Yes Hun?

They aren't saying you rock.

They aren't?

No they aren't and if you'd ever turn your iPod off you'd hear them properly.

What are they saying then?

They're saying "suck", not "rock".

BURN!!

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 163
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 3:10:11 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SuzeCheri

quote:

If the willingness to help improves?  I'll post a topic asking. 
In other words you won't chance it. If everybody promises to behave, you'll grace them with your questions. Pretty lame.

Look, both of us are extreme newbies, not only to the site, but to the whole concept of BDSM, yet we started a few threads. I started a very ambitious thread down in the Polyamory forum; a bunch of complete newbs giving advice on how to make a poly relationship work, that one worked out pretty well. We started a couple of other threads as well they didn't go over very well, gay issues aren't really of interest here. (There's to many people with bizarre prejudices). But guess what? When I think of another gay related topic, I'll post it and yes, it will be inundated by homophobes in disguise spouting some bizarre biological claptrap about how being gay is wrong, and I'll just ignore those posts for the most part and look for the ones that actually address the issue I raised. Like an adult. I will mostly ignore the sniping and bickering and the insults, like an adult.

I wasn't afraid to post here, why on earth would anybody over the age of 12 be afraid to post on a forum? I've been posting on forums of one sort or another for nearly 10 years now, I know how they work, I know what to expect. How anybody in 2011 who is old enough to be on this site could possibly not know these things is beyond me. You think this place is rough? Try a room full of tweenie girls arguing over which Spice Girl is the best or if Britney or Christina is the better singer. You and the other manly Doms around here wouldn't survive 10 minutes. They'll freaking steal your boyfriend for daring to disagree with them. And cliques? OMFG, you don't even begin to understand the meaning of that word till you deal with high school girls on a forum!!!

So, like I said, put up, or shut up. That's all there is to it. Stop hijacking threads, stop making snarky posts, stop making jokes, just stop doing all the things you are objecting to and report those posts you think cross the line. Go down to the cuckqueen thread and contribute something, either a viewpoint or a good question. Go to Ask a Master and contribute something worthwhile. Stop demanding others change and start leading the way.

Either that or STFU.



I love this post !!


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Profile   Post #: 164
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 3:18:15 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
Really this shit aint rocket science! Put a tweak here a little something something there... viola Much ado about nothing. Amazingly I've managed to some extreme stuff without sending someone <myself included> to the hospital. I did it all without reading a single book on BDSM. Oddly enuff I read about a book a week.

I sure as hell don't need some moron explaining to me how to have safe sex.

BadOne

_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

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We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

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Profile   Post #: 165
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 3:25:17 PM   
M4S73R


Posts: 232
Joined: 9/5/2011
Status: offline
Lawl +1 Suze.

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Profile   Post #: 166
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 3:26:07 PM   
NocturnalStalker


Posts: 3858
Joined: 12/4/2010
Status: offline
quote:

In other words you won't chance it. If everybody promises to behave, you'll grace them with your questions. Pretty lame.


In other words I see how every other question here is dealt with and figure what the point would be if I rhetorically know what will come of it.  Like, you seem to be playing stupid to the fact that this flawed forum runs off a flawed caste system of e-social superiority. 

quote:

We started a couple of other threads as well they didn't go over very well, gay issues aren't really of interest here. (There's to many people with bizarre prejudices). But guess what? When I think of another gay related topic, I'll post it and yes, it will be inundated by homophobes in disguise spouting some bizarre biological claptrap about how being gay is wrong, and I'll just ignore those posts for the most part and look for the ones that actually address the issue I raised. Like an adult. I will mostly ignore the sniping and bickering and the insults, like an adult.


Spare me your whole bleeding-heart talk about how dealing with discrimination makes you somehow better than other people.  It's great that you can deal with people that do agree/disagree but you see the latter part where you mentioned people saying outright obnoxious stuff such as how being gay means there is something very wrong with you?  If you were to make that accusation on any other forum that was properly run, it would have been deleted at the drop of a dime.  The reason why it can go on here is because this place might as well be a free-for-all. 

quote:

I wasn't afraid to post here, why on earth would anybody over the age of 12 be afraid to post on a forum?


I'll completely forget a message sent by Heather asking for my validation on a topic you both thought about posting.  I'll also turn your words around now and wonder how anybody over the age of 12 could be scared to seek approval from anybody else that they have to get their friend to do it for them. 

quote:

OMFG, you don't even begin to understand the meaning of that word till you deal with high school girls on a forum!!!


Welcome to CollarMe.com! 


quote:

So, like I said, put up, or shut up. That's all there is to it. Stop hijacking threads, stop making snarky posts, stop making jokes, just stop doing all the things you are objecting to and report those posts you think cross the line. Go down to the cuckqueen thread and contribute something, either a viewpoint or a good question. Go to Ask a Master and contribute something worthwhile. Stop demanding others change and start leading the way.


You'll see me, "putting up" when the morale improves.  I'm not going to contribute to a cuckqueen thread because I cannot relate to that experience personally.  Why would you contribute to something you have no knowledge on?  Sure, maybe I'll read it, maybe I won't be interested in it since it is something I plan to never embark on.  I'll leave that to this community and we'll see where it goes.  If I see an increase in legitimate activity, I'm sure more and more people will feel comfortable to post their actual thoughts as opposed to clicking on a topic, reading through all the flames, and going to YouTube to see what's trending.  Because that's how it is now.  Putting your stock into one person isn't going to do much but have one person carrying it.  How do I know this?  Because there are people that do answer the questions but has anything changed?  It has gotten worse.

"Lead the way."  I actually didn't have to contain my thoughts through CMail/rant to them in their inbox.  I came out and I pointed out what was wrong with this place.  It seems everybody's defense is the strawman that I'm the guy saying it.  So I have to wonder what would have happened if anybody more "respected" made that post. 

Why we'd tell them to make the change!

And here is where I'm going to shatter your little, Will Smith-feel-good-Hollywood movie trip.  It takes a group effort.  One person can make people aware, but it is up to the people to make a change.  It's like people that have messaged me privately saying they agree with me.  It doesn't matter if they do or don't, because they're still letting this happen by being silent or by not doing it at all.  Get your balls/ovaries out of your purses and help make it happen. 

The part that is most ignorant is people wonder why other websites are more successful than this. 

< Message edited by NocturnalStalker -- 9/8/2011 3:27:16 PM >


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Profile   Post #: 167
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 3:51:49 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NocturnalStalker:
Like this book here?  I see many people criticizing it and leading me to believe that they can offer more of an up-to-date insight in terms of an introduction.  Let me shine some perspective on this for you: when this book was published, I was starting kindergarten and one of the authors is dead now.  Some books can be timeless, but when a book written at a time when the world was still not ready for BDSM to breakthrough is cited to be a great introduction and to think it may have too much beating around the bush to try and convince the readers of the past that it wasn't so bad?  Sorry, if I want good literature I'd read good literature.  I want something fresh, today, and scientific.  Not a fuckin' labyrinth of words. That is something someone such as yourself could easily provide since you still participate in these activities today. 

I don't know if the book was ever intended to be timeless or a great piece of literature.  From the author's own Introduction.

"We use humor and illustration to make it fun.  SM is fun and we think that reading about it should be fun, too.  It's also hot stuff -- a wild, sexy, funny book that you will be proud to park beside your commode."

That doesn't sound to Me like they were attempting to write  great literature.  More like they were trying to introduce basics in a way that would appeal to the beginner or semi novice, while still being interesting reading to those who might not be kinky, but felt like picking up a book about some racy sex.

The question is does the book still fill this role?  I'd have to say that it does.  There is information in it that you're probably not going to find come up often on a venue such as CM because not all questions get asked that often and it's not worth writing a post about some silly little bit of trivia or another.


_____________________________

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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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Profile   Post #: 168
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 5:18:42 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig


Hey Suze, anybody ever tell you that



*Sigh*. Never mind.

< Message edited by PeonForHer -- 9/8/2011 5:19:56 PM >


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Profile   Post #: 169
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 5:23:57 PM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline
quote:

I'll completely forget a message sent by Heather asking for my validation on a topic you both thought about posting.
Heather didn't ask for your validation, Heather asked for your opinion. You flatter yourself thinking you were the only person I asked.
quote:

I'll also turn your words around now and wonder how anybody over the age of 12 could be scared to seek approval from anybody else that they have to get their friend to do it for them.
She didn't ask me to do anything. Suze didn't know I was asking people their opinions.

Now let me turn your words around on you, how could anybody over the age of 12 be such a pathetic worm that they would bring up a private email I sent to attack Suze. That is low, really low. That is low even by the standards of wannabe wanker dominant men. If there is anything to your new claim to want the boards to be more civil, then you will publicly apologize for doing so. However, I'm not going to hold my breath.

I feel debased just for knowing you exist.


(in reply to NocturnalStalker)
Profile   Post #: 170
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 5:48:54 PM   
NocturnalStalker


Posts: 3858
Joined: 12/4/2010
Status: offline
quote:

Heather didn't ask for your validation, Heather asked for your opinion.


Which makes no sense considering you think of me in a less-than-flattering light.  Why should my opinion matter to you?  You can sprinkle it however you'd like, at the end of the day it is still seeking my approval. 

quote:

how could anybody over the age of 12 be such a pathetic worm that they would bring up a private email I sent to attack Suze.


I don't know where you get this idea I am "attacking" Susan.  If I wanted to "attack" Susan, she'd know it.  She said something that conflicted with a prior debacle she and her partner had less-than-24 hours ago and was shut down. 

quote:

If there is anything to your new claim to want the boards to be more civil, then you will publicly apologize for doing so


I don't expect people to apologize to me over what they said to me so far.  When you're spouting a bunch of rude remarks such as, "STFU" do you honestly think I'm going to be the one doing the apologies - *especially* for displaying the truth?  I'm not going to "trade apologies" either.  She said what she wanted to, you're on the computer and can think about what you want to type (and believe me, if this was by voice you would want to kill me since I have a habit of talking over and not letting anybody else get a word in), and she got my reply. 

Yeah, I do wish for a more civil community here.  Opposing that viewpoint isn't the way to go about it, especially with flimsy statements.


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Profile   Post #: 171
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 5:56:20 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather
Heather didn't ask for your validation, Heather asked for your opinion. You flatter yourself thinking you were the only person I asked.


Nope, it's my bed time.

< Message edited by PeonForHer -- 9/8/2011 6:05:33 PM >


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Profile   Post #: 172
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 6:15:34 PM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline
quote:

Which makes no sense considering you think of me in a less-than-flattering light. Why should my opinion matter to you? You can sprinkle it however you'd like, at the end of the day it is still seeking my approval.
I didn't seek your approval, and I told you why I asked your opinion. I asked Hanners who I should ask, and she suggested some names. One of them was you, she said you were too egotistical to not be so flattered at being asked that you would give an honest opinion <she phrased with a lot more colour, but that is the gist of it>. Apparently she was right, as you are still insisting I wanted your approval or was seeking validation, when all I wanted was some opinions.

quote:

I don't know where you get this idea I am "attacking" Susan.
Gee I don't know, maybe it was this line here:
quote:

I'll also turn your words around now and wonder how anybody over the age of 12 could be scared to seek approval from anybody else that they have to get their friend to do it for them.
Implying she is both immature and afraid to ask people their opinion might just be construed an attack.
quote:

She said something that conflicted with a prior debacle she and her partner had less-than-24 hours ago and was shut down. 
No she didn't. There was no "debacle" with her partner. I am her partner. And there was no debacle except in your imagination. What we did have is a discussion over the last few days as to whether a particular thread idea was worth perusing. How that could be called a debacle is beyond me.
quote:

When you're spouting a bunch of rude remarks such as, "STFU" do you honestly think I'm going to be the one doing the apologies
I didn't say any such thing and it is to me you owe the apology for bringing up my private correspondence with you in a discussion in which I had no part.
quote:

*especially* for displaying the truth?
What truth? You have misrepresented the events at every turn. Apparently, along with your other shortcomings, it would seem you are a liar.
quote:

Yeah, I do wish for a more civil community here.  Opposing that viewpoint isn't the way to go about it, especially with flimsy statements.
Neither of us have opposed that view point. Go back and find one place where either of us has. I challenge you to do so.

(in reply to NocturnalStalker)
Profile   Post #: 173
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 6:58:56 PM   
NocturnalStalker


Posts: 3858
Joined: 12/4/2010
Status: offline
quote:

I didn't seek your approval, and I told you why I asked your opinion. I asked Hanners who I should ask, and she suggested some names. One of them was you, she said you were too egotistical to not be so flattered at being asked that you would give an honest opinion <she phrased with a lot more colour, but that is the gist of it>. Apparently she was right, as you are still insisting I wanted your approval or was seeking validation, when all I wanted was some opinions.


Because you wanted my honesty.  And if I told you that it was a stupid idea, there was a chance that this topic would not be made.  If I thought it was a good topic, then that increases the likelihood for it.  Regardless if how you want to make it look, when you ask somebody if whether it would be a good idea to do this or not you value their influence.  People ask me for my opinion every day for whatever reason so the days of me being flattered by it fizzled out quite some time ago.  You asked, you got it. 

quote:

Implying she is both immature and afraid to ask people their opinion might just be construed an attack.


Oh, "might."  It "might" be an attack.  It "might" not be.  It "might" be because she said something confrontational and assuming then got it thrown back in her face.  She went down that road, and ran into a dead-end with it. 

quote:

No she didn't. There was no "debacle" with her partner. I am her partner. And there was no debacle except in your imagination. What we did have is a discussion over the last few days as to whether a particular thread idea was worth perusing. How that could be called a debacle is beyond me.


Why must you make me do this...

You're her partner?  Really?  That is why she has two people posting under one account, differentiated by colour.  The entire point of your message was that Susan and Cherise had different feelings over the situation you presented me.  You were just the messenger in the situation, seeing as the topic's content (if it were to be made) would concern only them.  One thought this way, the other thought this way. 

quote:

I didn't say any such thing and it is to me you owe the apology for bringing up my private correspondence with you in a discussion in which I had no part.


Okay, I'm definitely not apologizing to somebody that called me a "pathetic worm" and claimed my existence made them feel debased. 

quote:

What truth? 


Anybody want to be my echo?  $9.99 per repeat.  You could probably make a fortune.

quote:

You have misrepresented the events at every turn. Apparently, along with your other shortcomings, it would seem you are a liar.


Well you almost made a post without a sly jab to myself!  There was no "misrepresentation" at all. To say that you sent me mail without the two people it concerned having *any* knowledge that you were sending a mail out to random strangers on the Internet about an issue they were having must mean you may not be a very good "partner."  I know a lot of people would dislike it if they and their SO's problems were being made available to a string of people they don't know well or at all.  Doesn't matter how deep that problem is, because personal life is personal life.

Then, if they did give consent, why didn't they just send it to me in the first place without needing you to play carrier pigeon?  Don't you think that makes my "attack" on her look more, "Hey, he has a good point.  Why would she say something like, being too scared to post a topic, when she has to have her friends talk to other people that she doesn't even know and to be judge on whether something her and her partner want to post be green-lighted?"

Oh look, Heather got herself in another bind. 

quote:

Neither of us have opposed that view point. Go back and find one place where either of us has. I challenge you to do so.


You're opposing it by opposing whatever it is I'm saying.  In case you are unaware, I'm the only person that I can see who is making this pressing issue public.  So if you agree with it, logic would dictate you wouldn't question the person speaking it, right?  Oh but wait - personal animosity cannot be placed aside.  How silly of me to expect all this talk of being "adults" to come into practice for the greater good. 


_____________________________

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Profile   Post #: 174
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 7:02:47 PM   
SuzeCheri


Posts: 483
Joined: 7/19/2011
From: Outside looking in
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NocturnalStalker

quote:

In other words you won't chance it. If everybody promises to behave, you'll grace them with your questions. Pretty lame.


blah blah blah excuses excuses blah blah

quote:

We started a couple of other threads as well they didn't go over very well, gay issues aren't really of interest here. (There's to many people with bizarre prejudices). But guess what? When I think of another gay related topic, I'll post it and yes, it will be inundated by homophobes in disguise spouting some bizarre biological claptrap about how being gay is wrong, and I'll just ignore those posts for the most part and look for the ones that actually address the issue I raised. Like an adult. I will mostly ignore the sniping and bickering and the insults, like an adult.


blah blah blah misdirection blah blah ignoring the point made blah blah

quote:

I wasn't afraid to post here, why on earth would anybody over the age of 12 be afraid to post on a forum?


blah blah blah gratuitous insult blah blah twist facts blah blah blah

quote:

OMFG, you don't even begin to understand the meaning of that word till you deal with high school girls on a forum!!!


Blah blah blah


quote:

So, like I said, put up, or shut up. That's all there is to it. Stop hijacking threads, stop making snarky posts, stop making jokes, just stop doing all the things you are objecting to and report those posts you think cross the line. Go down to the cuckqueen thread and contribute something, either a viewpoint or a good question. Go to Ask a Master and contribute something worthwhile. Stop demanding others change and start leading the way.


blah blah blah excuses blah blah excuses blah blah


Put up or shut up.

(in reply to NocturnalStalker)
Profile   Post #: 175
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 7:12:31 PM   
NocturnalStalker


Posts: 3858
Joined: 12/4/2010
Status: offline
Why did you respond to yourself using my name in the quote box?

(Damn, I'm good.)


_____________________________

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Profile   Post #: 176
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 7:13:51 PM   
Buzzzz


Posts: 839
Joined: 11/28/2010
Status: offline


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Profile   Post #: 177
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 7:16:06 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline
NocturnalStalker,

You rarely add anything of value to a thread, but bitch about others who don't. You have responded to various posts of mine in rude and or dismissive ways. You want this place to be more civil and have more class?

Leave...or grow the fuck up.

(in reply to NocturnalStalker)
Profile   Post #: 178
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 7:23:32 PM   
SuzeCheri


Posts: 483
Joined: 7/19/2011
From: Outside looking in
Status: offline
Put up or shut up. Or are you going to leave it to a bunch of teenaged dykes to do it? You're supposed to be a dominant right? So be one, take action. You've shown us all you can talk a good game, now show us there's more to you than that.

Fish or cut bait, your call. So far you're the bait boy, and not a very competent one at that. You're turning off the supporters you would have with your obvious hypocrisy, cowardice, and egotism.

(in reply to NocturnalStalker)
Profile   Post #: 179
RE: Screw the Roses.... - 9/8/2011 7:29:12 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
Suze it is his typical MO. Not really worth the bother.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to SuzeCheri)
Profile   Post #: 180
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