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Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 4:22:54 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		Do you think there is a correlation between aftercare and subspace?
I don't ever go into subspace and I require no aftercare (unless you consider going to the kitchen and getting him pretzels and hummus as aftercare).
I find that I do like to touch him a little afterwards and if it's at night, he'll completely wrap himself around me to fall asleep.
That, to me, is normal affection though.

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 4:36:19 PM   
Endivius


Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline 		No.

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 4:38:03 PM   
tolovetolaugh


Posts: 648
Joined: 4/30/2008
Status: offline 		Cuddling works as after care for me- but I am a touchslut/cuddlewhore.
I do find the aftercare makes me feel more emotionally connected, which can help with getting to that happy subby place.


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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 5:03:59 PM   
mummyman321


Posts: 2102
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Dusseldorf
Status: offline 		I am not sure if correlation is the right term. Do I think there is a correlation. NO. Do I think aftercare is needed after subspace. YES. But I guess it depends on the play you do. I see aftercare as a safety issue. When I am in deep subspace it takes time for me to regain all my senses, motor control of my body and my mental acuity. The time it take me to recover can range from a few minutes to hours depending upon the depth of play.

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 5:07:52 PM   
fragilepieces


Posts: 416
Joined: 7/6/2008
Status: offline 		I do at times hit a level of altered sense but it is not an always thing.    As for after care---I like a cuddle but I like a cuddle after vanilla sex too.    I require nothing special.  

Do I think there is a correlation between the two---possibly.   If you are hitting a deep altered state of mind---yep it can be taxing and you might require, touch to push you back into a zone of reality, a soothing voice, perhaps food or water, or a warm blanket (I have been known to get chills sometimes).   I do sort of think it is up to the person because everyone may experience it differently or not at all.




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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 6:16:30 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		No 'aftercare' for me, thank you very much

After a good beat the fuck out of me, I don't want to be touched, coddled, cuddled, talked to...nothing. I just want to be left alone to enjoy the pain.

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 6:18:39 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
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quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

No 'aftercare' for me, thank you very much

After a good beat the fuck out of me, I don't want to be touched, coddled, cuddled, talked to...nothing. I just want to be left alone to enjoy the pain.


I never would have guessed that!

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 6:19:25 PM   
IrishMist


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Joined: 11/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968


quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

No 'aftercare' for me, thank you very much

After a good beat the fuck out of me, I don't want to be touched, coddled, cuddled, talked to...nothing. I just want to be left alone to enjoy the pain.


I never would have guessed that!



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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 6:22:18 PM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
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quote:

ORIGINAL: tolovetolaugh

I am a touchslut/cuddlewhore.



I read that about you... on a bathroom wall.  

(quickly ducks and runs)



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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 8:27:21 PM   
hangemhigh1953


Posts: 245
Joined: 7/8/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

No 'aftercare' for me, thank you very much

After a good beat the fuck out of me, I don't want to be touched, coddled, cuddled, talked to...nothing. I just want to be left alone to enjoy the pain.

Umm... Wouldn't solitude be a form of aftercare?


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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 8:32:43 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		Nope, sub space comes during play, and from play, after care is done after the play to bring me back from sub space, at least a little bit.

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 9:32:20 PM   
Endivius


Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

No 'aftercare' for me, thank you very much

After a good beat the fuck out of me, I don't want to be touched, coddled, cuddled, talked to...nothing. I just want to be left alone to enjoy the pain.


This.

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/9/2011 10:10:57 PM   
art4YOU


Posts: 55
Joined: 1/8/2011
Status: offline 		i get so deep into sub space and a bottle of water, a blanket and a hug always works . i feel the Domme needs the aftercare almost as much the gentle touching and reafirming our devotion always brings us closer

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/10/2011 8:33:11 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: hangemhigh1953


quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

No 'aftercare' for me, thank you very much

After a good beat the fuck out of me, I don't want to be touched, coddled, cuddled, talked to...nothing. I just want to be left alone to enjoy the pain.

Umm... Wouldn't solitude be a form of aftercare?


No, not when you take into account what is meant by 'aftercare' on these forums. Being left alone, for most, would be seen as a lack of aftercare.

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/10/2011 12:13:42 PM   
tolovetolaugh


Posts: 648
Joined: 4/30/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSlaveLA

quote:

ORIGINAL: tolovetolaugh

I am a touchslut/cuddlewhore.



I read that about you... on a bathroom wall.  

(quickly ducks and runs)




Did you notice when you called the number underneath, my voice sounded kinda manly? It was a cold I swear.

I am a firm believer friends should be able to cuddle without sexual connotations put into it.


_____________________________


That which yields, is not always weak. —
Jacqueline Carey (Kushiel's Dart)

I wrote a porn!
http://www.collarchat.com/m_3840531

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/10/2011 12:31:55 PM   
ProlificNeeds


Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline 		I'm in the 'no relation at all' camp.

I think reaching 'sub-space' or your happy place is entirely dependant on your favorite experiences, I like cold cruelty, or objectification to really hit that place outside myself, if he cuddled me before I came down from it, I'd lose it, which wouldn't be doing me any favors. Best way to skate on that afterglow is to be used as a foot stool for awhile and not made to move around much.

But I do love cuddling in many other contexts and circumstances!

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/10/2011 1:07:31 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		Well, if you have never been in subspace than you probably don't need aftercare.  However, that bit of affection, cuddling ect., is what many consider aftercare.  Subspace is intense as if you are transformed in some way and that can be disorienting.  Some people require more than a cuddle to regain their focus, things like candy or sugar can help many so I guess it is possible it drops the natural levels in the system.  Chocolate can be helpful to me because it has the additional element of giving warm fuzzies.  But I don't always need it.  Sometimes I want my own area to calm down and no one to bother me.

There is no correlation to me because I don't need to drop into subspace in order to enjoy a bit of chocolate or alone time.
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

Do you think there is a correlation between aftercare and subspace?
I don't ever go into subspace and I require no aftercare


_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/10/2011 1:38:37 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline 		Aftercare for me consists more of the psychological rather than the physical. In other words, if he handed me a bottle of water and a candy bar and then walked away I would probably feel pretty neglected, but him giving me nothing and sitting and talking with me for the "cooldown" would leave me feeling good.

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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/10/2011 1:49:43 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		yep.  It is different for us all.  Talking does nothing for me because I can't comprehend much when I am still spacing. 

btw... your sigline is hilarious

quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

Aftercare for me consists more of the psychological rather than the physical. In other words, if he handed me a bottle of water and a candy bar and then walked away I would probably feel pretty neglected, but him giving me nothing and sitting and talking with me for the "cooldown" would leave me feeling good.

You want to impress your girl, open her car door for her. She'll love it, plus the walk from her door to yours is a great time to fart.




_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


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RE: Afercare and Subspace - 9/10/2011 1:57:02 PM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline 		I only subspace with floggers, for some reason. But as soon as I'm out of subspace (or sometimes during!) we continue with 'other stuff'...which I find rather hot

When I was playing with others and bottoming rather than subbing, I needed the whole cuddling/sugar/attention thing. With Master, I know he loves me and I know he really wants me to be happy, and as we talk every day anyway I get the attention I need. So we don't really do 'aftercare' in the traditional sense.



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