RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd been raped?

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 2:13:28 PM

NiceGuyNihilist

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I think that this was the wavelength that the OP was on. I think he was asking that people dig deep for that extra bit of honesty, as it were. Like, 'Do you have these shitty feelings that you don't like about yourself?' That's the mode you get into, in therapy. You wince and say, 'Yes, and I don't like those feelings' but you go ahead and talk about them anyway, because you think it might help'. But that can't work at all if we move straight to a moral argument.

You not only nailed the bullseye, but split your first arrow in half with a second. Thank you.

It baffles me that some people seem unable to tell the difference between a thing's morality and its veracity. Yes, it's utterly immoral to feel revulsion for a person because of a horror that was inflicted on him through no fault of his own. That doesn't mean such revulsion can't exist, or that those who (might) hold it have any control over it. The world is full of things that are both perfectly immoral and perfectly true. Is this one of them? Well, I don't really know. That's why I asked.

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 2:18:38 PM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia

No. If this had happened to him it would not have made him LESS. He would have turned it around so that it would have made him even more in control of me, because it would have made him understand, even more than he did already, my buttons and what makes me tick. If someone knew and understood all my dark and ugly places and accepted and loved me anyway, how could I do anything but worship him and trust him even more...?
[/color]

That's pretty damned magnificent, Cynthia - that's all that I can say. :-)

Ah. Edited for what's now apparently a redundant comment to the OP.

< Message edited by PeonForHer -- 9/17/2011 2:19:31 PM >

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 2:30:24 PM

zephyroftheNorth

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Thanks for clarifying NGN. I do think though that the fact that so many of us got it wrong means the clarification was necessary.

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Post #: 123

RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 3:10:47 PM

Arpig

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quote:

I had no trouble understanding what Peon was trying to say

I would post something that says that I disagree with this, and explains why it is clear to me from this statement that you didn't, but I won't. I wouldn't want anybody to think I was rushing in to defend Heather.

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Post #: 124

RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 3:23:36 PM

zephyroftheNorth

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

quote:

I had no trouble understanding what Peon was trying to say
I would post something that says that I disagree with this, and explains why it is clear to me from this statement that you didn't, but I won't. I wouldn't want anybody to think I was rushing in to defend Heather.

*gasp* what, you're going to just allow someone to disagree with something you're honey sweetie girl posted without refuting it. You HAVE grown up.

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 3:29:47 PM

Arpig

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quote:

Whereas, apparently I'm hard-wired to prefer one nose-shape over another. And believe me, I'd change that if I could. Who wouldn't? Why limit your options?

I suspect you aren't really. I don't think any sexual preference is really hard wired. Men, women, whatever, it changes over time. I don't actually believe in homosexuality or heterosexuality as distinct things, rather they are just the opposite ends of a spectrum. And as you yourself discovered, one can move about on that spectrum as over time, one's sexual orientation can change. While I am technically what is referred to as bisexual, I have almost zero attraction for men these days, I have drifted towards the hetero end of the scale.

As far as your nose issue goes, as Cheri sort of intimated, I suspect you just have yet to meet a woman who interests you enough for you to to overlook the shape of her nose.

And as for the whole bisexual men side issue...Heather's right. The attitude demonstrated by DesFIP and certain others is homophobic and bigoted. My advice to those who wish to dispute this glaringly obvious fact is to just shut up and deal with it.

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Post #: 126

RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 3:32:50 PM

Arpig

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quote:

Yes, it's utterly immoral to feel revulsion for a person because of a horror that was inflicted on him through no fault of his own.

And in my mind utterly idiotic to do so as well. Sorry, but anybody who does feel this sort of revulsion has some serious issues they need to deal with.

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Post #: 127

RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 3:34:29 PM

Arpig

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quote:

*gasp* what, you're going to just allow someone to disagree with something you're honey sweetie girl posted without refuting it. You HAVE grown up.

Ummmmm...what to say to this...how about...go fuck yourself.

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Post #: 128

RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 3:39:02 PM

zephyroftheNorth

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quote:

And as for the whole bisexual men side issue...Heather's right. The attitude demonstrated by DesFIP and certain others is homophobic and bigoted. My advice to those who wish to dispute this glaringly obvious fact is to just shut up and deal with it.

See it's things like this that make us think you rush to defend Heather and the other three. She wasn't the only one to call out Des and the others yet it's Heather you run to support.

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 3:45:45 PM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

quote:

Whereas, apparently I'm hard-wired to prefer one nose-shape over another. And believe me, I'd change that if I could. Who wouldn't? Why limit your options?

I suspect you aren't really. I don't think any sexual preference is really hard wired. Men, women, whatever, it changes over time.

Oh, it's true all right. I really do have a problem with long, sharp, hooked noses.

By comparison - It's not just that I've now freed up my bi-side. I've 'collected' images of femdoms over the years that most would see as enormously far apart. I started by imagining a femdom as a tiny, dainty little thing. Then I saw a pic of a musclebound woman with cropped hair. A stirring in me and - bang! She was added to my list. Now, a femdom for me could look like Michelle Pfeiffer only even less butch; she could look chunky, beefy and pretty much everyone's idea of a wrestler; or she could look tall, aloof and aristocratic, or of average height, rosy-cheeked and cheerful.

But she *still* couldn't have a long, sharp, hooked nose. Or a beehive hairstyle.

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 3:59:14 PM

Arpig

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quote:

See it's things like this that make us think you rush to defend Heather and the other three. She wasn't the only one to call out Des and the others yet it's Heather you run to support.

See, it's Heather who is the one who first made the proposition and spent several pages defending the proposition. Now that wouldn't have anything to do with why I mentioned her...of course not.

You see it the way you want to see it and nothing, not logic, not common sense, and not even reality is going to make you see it any differently.

That's your issue to deal with, not mine.

< Message edited by Arpig -- 9/17/2011 4:05:52 PM >

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Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

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Post #: 131

RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 4:04:18 PM

Arpig

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quote:

But she *still* couldn't have a long, sharp, hooked nose.

Well then I guess you are just a bigoted aquilinorhinophobe.

quote:

Or a beehive hairstyle.

Well that one is obvious, it really doesn't need mentioning...in fact I wish you hadn't mentioned it.

< Message edited by Arpig -- 9/17/2011 4:05:15 PM >

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Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

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Post #: 132

RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 4:14:45 PM

DesFIP

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I thought I was a bigot because I wouldn't get into a relationship with a vegetarian. Or a guy under six feet. Or a girl. Or some guy the age of my children.

Of course Heather's a bigot because she won't broaden herself in order to have sex with men, no matter what their hair color is or anything else.

And despite Arpig's assertion that none of us are truly heterosexual or homosexual or monogamous, he's wrong. There are lots of us here who are only hard wired to enjoy sex within very narrow ranges. Heather for one example, me for another.

As to why I am totally turned off bi guys? Which nobody asked about, btw. Years of experience of them coming on to me, and then a day later being all over somebody else. I have never known a bi male who is monogamous.

The same reason I don't like frat boy types because they also don't seem to be able to date one person at a time. Hell, I won't date drunks or addicts either. Yup, I'm just full of prejudices.

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 4:18:08 PM

PeonForHer

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Arpig,

As a matter of interest, has your beard been designated a national park?

It's just that I think it needs pruning because I'm beginning to suspect that are so many species of flora and fauna are now inhabiting it that they're beginning to eat into crucial portions of your anatomy.

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 4:22:19 PM

zephyroftheNorth

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quote:

Years of experience of them coming on to me, and then a day later being all over somebody else. I have never known a bi male who is monogamous

Let me ask you something then. Are you also bigoted against het men who do the same thing or is it okay with you if het males do it? You posts yesterday did display bigoted behavior like it or not or at the very least a distinct lack of understanding of what being bi means.

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Post #: 135

RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 4:23:02 PM

Arpig

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quote:

As to why I am totally turned off bi guys? Which nobody asked about, btw. Years of experience of them coming on to me, and then a day later being all over somebody else. I have never known a bi male who is monogamous.

There you go. Assigning attributes to a group of people based on an utterly unrelated attribute is pretty much the definition of bigotry. Thank you for proving beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are indeed a bigot. Well done Fipster, well done indeed.

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Post #: 136

RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 4:24:40 PM

Arpig

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Perhaps all the steroids are affecting your cognitive abilities there boy.

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Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

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Post #: 137

RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 4:26:20 PM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

As to why I am totally turned off bi guys? Which nobody asked about, btw. Years of experience of them coming on to me, and then a day later being all over somebody else. I have never known a bi male who is monogamous.

I am. I have the occasional wank at the thought of male bodies, and that's it. I don't do playing about with partnership loyalty. That's unchanged in my profile since I wrote it a few years ago.

I was wondering, actually, how do you define 'bisexual'? Is it any man who has even the fantasy of another man? Or is it a man who'll willingly have a real, all-out-partnership with a man? Two opposite extremes - where are you, re your definition of 'bisexual' - on that spectrum?

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 4:29:39 PM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

Perhaps all the steroids are affecting your cognitive abilities there boy.

Fuck off. I've never had either, and anyone who suggests otherwise will be hearing from my lawyers in double-quick time.

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Post #: 139

RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/17/2011 4:32:16 PM

zephyroftheNorth

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Umm Peon, I am perfectly willing to...ummm...inspect your body for evidence of steroid use. ~leers and wipes drool~

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