kinkiminx
Posts: 73
Joined: 10/5/2005 From: Brighton, Sussex, UK Status: offline
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Hi Rose, Good on you for having the guts to ask a question many won’t in case its not PC. I’m not overweight myself, (well technically I’m not overweight at all.) But I used to be a 12 ½ % fat 9 ½ st gymnast, so you could say that by my standards I’m a fair bit plumper than I’d like to be. (not heavier, just plumper.) To everyone who took this as an attack – I don’t think she meant it that way. It sounds more like someone with some problems with her own body image trying to understand some more about how others feel about theirs –if you’re happy with your shape I didn’t notice her saying she had anything against you, its only her personal opinion… Beauty *is* in the eye of the beholder and a lot of people find it hard to see it in themselves. If people want to get themselves fitter and lose weight, that’s their right just as much as it’s the right of those who like themselves bigger to stay big. You probably need to think about the self esteem and the weight separately as well as together, they might not be tied in a closely as you think, on the other hand, they might be even more related than you think – maybe you need to sort out the self esteem before you can lose the weight. Can I ask how any sub / slave can look in the mirror and be pleased with themselves being that way? Look at the good bits – what you like about yourself! From a personal perspective I like myself as a person, but I’m not 100% satisfied with the mirror. I would love to get myself in better shape, but I can look in the mirror and see potential if I can find the time and motivation to push myself a bit more when it comes to diet & exercise. I’ve been putting so much effort into my work life, other people etc, recently that I’ve not had time for myself. A lot of subs like to serve, maybe many spend too much time paying attention to others and not enough to themselves. How do the Dom's/Domme's feel about there overweight sub/slaves? Not being a Dom, and not having one, I can’t really help a great deal. I’m sure its all personal taste and opinion. My ex Dom used to compliment me a lot when I succeeded in keeping fit and letting me know he appreciated it, it did help, so I can imagine he preferred me slim. I like a Dom to be happy with me as I am (personality) but as far as physical weight goes, I’d rather he prefer a slim sub and take a few pounds off me than prefer me curvier as it wouldn’t be good for my health or my self esteem. Or how do You feel seeing other ones like that? If people are happy with their weight, that’s one good thing, but then there’s health to think about. There are a lot of big girls in the scene, and I worry about the health of other subbie friends who are overweight but it is up to them. Then again when it isn’t and they would love to lose weight but can’t find the motivation I’m always happy to help. Isn't health issues a major concern? Not for me in the big sense as I’m only a little plumper than I should be, but health issues are still a concern as my strength and flexibility could do with some attention, and after doing gymnastics and getting the sort of injuries you often get in competition its really important to keep things up properly, or it can cause problems. In the bigger sense, health issues *should* really be a concern to everyone. Even if someone likes them self curvier it’s possible to keep curves at the same time as keeping fit if you want to. I think overweight girls are more accepted in the scene than they are in everyday life so perhaps “coming out” into the scene for overweight subs is easier than it is for non-overweight girls. Also BDSM isn’t yet really accepted as a sexuality, and isn’t really discussed, people can become confused about whether they’re odd or perverted in a negative context and then comfort eat when they can’t talk about it. The other thing is people are just getting bigger in general. Its easy to get fat, no one has the time to exercise and the nearest piece of fast food is no more than a quick drive away and there’s so much rubbish going round about what a healthy diet really is or isn’t. Everyone is on all the latest fads, and none of them work. The truth is everyone’s body is different and what works for one person might not be good for the next… well I’ll shut up now before I diverge too far from the point into nutrition… some are happy with it, others aren’t. What does worry me though is that you said your Master "hates fat people". Did you mean that, or that he doesn't find overweight girls as attractive as slim ones? If he really does hate fat people he is judging people by their appearance alone, so please be careful. Good luck to everyone trying to get in shape and to those who are happy as they are!
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