Iamsemisweet -> RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? (9/29/2011 8:57:10 PM)
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The relationship with offspring is critical. I had a similar experience with someone Lizi. He told me a story about how his ex wife got their 3 teenage kids addicted to meth. He "tried" to intervene, but the kids were too rebellious. So he let them stay with her, instead of getting custody, getting them help, anything. DEALBREAKER! The way I see it, the parenting is the most important thing I have ever done. I can't imagine someone who would choose someone like that for the mother of his kids, and would then abandon the kids when they were obviously in trouble. quote:
ORIGINAL: lizi quote:
ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet It'a a long list. At 52 I have become very particular. But here are the top 6 1. Doesn't like animals 2. Large number of failed relationships, such as marriages where the relationship with the ex is hostile, failed relationships with children, bad relationships with parents. 3. Unfit and unhealthy. 4. Unkempt 5. Shiftless 6. Stupid Oh, I also broke up with someone one time because he paid 75 bucks to go see Anne Coulter, of all people. Definite deal breaker This reminded me of the other deal breaker I have besides honesty, well this post and Anne's post. Bad/failed relationships with children first of all and family second. Not taking care of your children is included there as well. True story. I met someone who was attractive, articulate, very good job in DC, interesting, etc. All in all a great prospect and things between us were progressing well. We met for a second coffee date where he proceeded to tell me a story he thought was funny. About how he was taking the gf, soon to be second wife, to meet his kids who had just moved with their mother into a new home. He didn't have the exact address, just the neighborhood, the gf didn't understand how he'd know where the house was. He pulled into a driveway and they went to the front door. Sure enough it was the right place. He explained to her later that he went into the neighborhood and looked for the most unkept/disgusting/filthy place house there. Later in the same conversation he told me with a shake of the head how these new living quarters included holes in the floors that you could actually fall through and how his daughters never seemed to have any clothing when they came to visit him. I was in shock by now and asked why he didn't keep these children and raise them himself and he replied - because the new gf didn't want them around. Wow. I got up and left and never spoke to him again. He chased me out into the parking lot saying that he couldn't 'make' the ex spend his support money on her living quarters or clothing and it's true, you pay your money and you really have no say in what it goes to but to know that he let those girls live like that because a woman (who he eventually divorced as well) said so made it clear that I could never have any kind of respect for him.
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